Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.

This is the play I wrote for drama in an hour...not that amazing, but worht a chuckle. or a WTF, something like that.


Prologue-
This is the day the great movie, The Remote Control Massacre is being made. Or…it’s.. uh.. Trying to be made. Unsuccessfully. Morgan is seen here trying to direct an angry angst filled cast, as the day grows long. The events following are not fiction, but a figment of my imagination. They halfway happened. Okay, so in actuality, it was a lot worse than this play. But, really, It was pretty frightening. So here we go,

The Remote Control Massacre,
And epic drama, by Morgan J. Stewart.
Co-written by a figment of my imagination.


Page 1
THE REMOTE CONTROL MASSACRE

Morgan- Alright, lets start this up. Lee, Dude, I need you to go by the door there-
Sam- How come I don’t have a line here?!
Erin- HAHAHA, JOES HERE!
Morgan- Sam, you don’t have a line here because your character isn’t even in the house yet. Now, Lee, go back over there--
Lacey- This movie SUCKS.
Morgan- Well, dude, it’s just a--
Sam- Are you SURE I can’t have a line?
Erin- JOES HERE!
Morgan- STOP IT!
Jaclyn- Why do you have to keep YELLING at us?
Sam- He won’t give me a line either.
Morgan- Sam, you’ve had the script for 2 months, you know how many lines you have.
Jason- You’re getting leaves on my CARPET.
Lee- Can we just shoot the scene maaaaaan I’m tired…
Jaclyn- Stop WHINING
Erin- JOES HERE! Hahahaha!
Lacey- I’m gonna quit.
Morgan- Alright, everyone, STOP. If we don’t get done, I’m not ordering any pizza.
Lee- WOAH! PIZZA?!
Jason- You better not get pizza on my carpet.
Erin- I don’t really like pizza.
Lacey- You’re ordering breadsticks too. Cause I don’t want any piz-
Sam- Can I have just ONE line?
Morgan- SHUTUP Sam. Your lines are coming up..
Sam- Fine… I just want one line.
Morgan- You have THIRTEEN lines in the end! And a fight scene! Just wait!
Erin- When do we leave?
Jason- I should have brought my couch… We are still using Pokey the Penguin music right? Because I have an idea for that.
Lee- Dude, lets just shoot the movie… I need to get some soda after we’re done..
Morgan- Alright, Lee, go over there by that door. Now, Erin, when he comes in, yell, ITS MASTER SCAR!! Okay?
Erin- I guess.. but it sounds stupid.
Jaclyn- Just do it so we can leave already.
Sam- Is this where I have a line?
Morgan- NO.. Sam.. NO
Jason- I’m still dead, right?
Sam- How come Jason gets to be dead?
Lacey- This is SO boring.. I’m gonna go look upstairs..
Morgan- hang on, what? No Lacey, you’re in this scene man.
Erin- IT’S MASTER SCAR!
Morgan- No! Lee! Not yet! I don’t even have the camera ready!
Erin- Haha…what? HAHA! JOES HERE!
Morgan- Erin will you stop saying that line? You only said it ONCE in the script..
Lacey- (mimicking) Only said once, whatever, look, here we go, JOES HERE.
Jason- I have an idea for after I’m dead at Doctor fear’s Lab. I was Joe right?
Page 2
Morgan- Yes! Let’s shoot this scene though. Now lee, Where the binder?
Lee- The what man?
Morgan- The evil remote thingy.
Lee- Oh yeah, I gave that thing to Jaclyn
Jaclyn- No, No you didn’t.
Lee- I LOVE YOU JACLYN!!
Erin- JOES HERE!
Morgan- STOP! Who has the binder?
Lacey- The what?
Morgan- The evil remote!
Lacey- That’s a stupid name, and WHY are you yelling at me! You JERK.
Morgan- Well who HAS it?
Jason- has what?
Morgan- The BINDER
Erin- What’s TH-
Morgan- THE REMOTE
Erin- Oh yeah, it’s right there
Morgan-…:sighs:: thank you…, Now. Lee, come in yelling about killing Joe.
Erin- JOES HERE!
Jaclyn- SHUTUP
Morgan- ANYWAY… When you do Erin’s gonna say, MASTER SCAR!!! Then you point the remote at her, then freeze so I can do some camera work, Okay?
Lee- Alright man.. let’s do it..
Lacey- Am I dying now?
Morgan- No, you die next.
Lacey- Ugh, Whatever…
Morgan- Okay, on 3.….one….two…
Sam- Wait! Do I have a line?!
Morgan- What?
Erin- MASTER SCAR!
Morgan- No! Wait! STOP!!
Sam- What?
Jason- Am I gonna be laying over there, or am I off camera?
Erin- Can I say something else here? I don’t like this line.
Jaclyn- Just DO it Erin, I want to go eat…This is so boring.
Lee- Jaclyn! I LOVE YOU!
Morgan- No to everything that anyone said. Now go back Lee…and.. let’s go. Camera rolling…one…two.. THREE.
Lee- BWHAHAHAA!!!
Erin- MASTER SCAR!!
Morgan- Okay….now.. STOP…That’s a wrap everyone. Now, only 16 more scenes to go.
Lacey- Good. I quit.
Sam- Not before any of my LINES!
Erin- Joes here!
Morgan- Okay.. well.. we’ll finish later. Les go eat
(everyone agrees)
Erin- But… I don’t even like pizza.
Lee- I LOVE YOU JACLYN!
Morgan- I hate you all. The End