Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.

----Chapter two----
The backstory

Now Jim, who had lived on a farm in neptune his whole life, had waited for his turn to be a superhero.

The superhero's lived on mercury, for unknown reasons.
They probably just thought mercury sounded sexy.

Well, Thomas or jimmy, I can't remember, he decided that his superpower would be,

TURNING INTO AN ULTRA POWERFUL SUMO WRESTLER.

Now of course, the evil supervillain aggency, PETA, was fighting against him.

Curse that peta.

Well, Uncle Sam or matthew, whatever, he was anxious to destory peta with some sort of gamma ray/anti matter salad fork.

BUT THERE WAS NO TIME.

There was a nuclear war between space factions 6 & 7, and the planet of PluSat. This was after pluto and saturn collided and the french decided all their women were evil for not shaving their armpits.

Those crazy french.
TO BE CONTINUED