Smurfy's MindSay Blog

Open for Grooviness

Smurfy — 2004-05-12T06:05:00-05:00

Looks like Smurfy got a "BLOG". Oh my. For my first rant/whiney thing, I think, what I'm gonna do, is be a typical mindsay user. Get ready.

AH MY LIFE SUX I CANT SPELL NE THING AND I WANT TO DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE.

Okay, I'm glad I have that out. Now onto the important stuff, like my pointless life details which no one on earth could possibly care to read.

Ba-Da-Bing

The day started well, I got on the bus. Bus. The bus is a good place in the mornings. I am the offical GUY-WHO-YELLS-FUNNY-STORIES guy. I just make up alot of stuff and blurt it out in odd patterns. You have NO idea how much fun this is. Like my inviclbe FIEND rant, and the SWEDES rant, (that was a good one, I did it twice) and then today, Our JARROD-GOT-HIS-FACE-KICKED-AND-BECAME-A-SUPER-SAIYAN rant. It was a DARN good one too, I must say. Then I got to school, stared around at people for the first few minutes, actually caught a glimpse of the one they call... "Brittany", and proceeded to follow the magical bell of scheduling classes.

I ate 2 or 3 lemon drops and I don't remember much after that.

I told this stupid ghetto girl to stop talking because she was stupid. That was fun. She just yelled some stuff in Ghettoish and walked off. didn't sound like much, but I couldn't tell.

I then wrote a play about the making of The Remote Control massacre....

Then Brittany forgot the holy grail. Curse her kool-aid drinking self.

Then I made this stupid thing.

Then I wrote about random things, and will continue to do so.

WOOHOO.

Later my home-diggities.

The Remote Control Massacre: The play about the movie, that sucked.

Smurfy — 2004-05-13T07:05:00-05:00

This is the play I wrote for drama in an hour...not that amazing, but worht a chuckle. or a WTF, something like that.

Prologue-
This is the day the great movie, The Remote Control Massacre is being made. Or…it’s.. uh.. Trying to be made. Unsuccessfully. Morgan is seen here trying to direct an angry angst filled cast, as the day grows long. The events following are not fiction, but a figment of my imagination. They halfway happened. Okay, so in actuality, it was a lot worse than this play. But, really, It was pretty frightening. So here we go,

The Remote Control Massacre,
And epic drama, by Morgan J. Stewart.
Co-written by a figment of my imagination.

Page 1
THE REMOTE CONTROL MASSACRE

Morgan- Alright, lets start this up. Lee, Dude, I need you to go by the door there-
Sam- How come I don’t have a line here?!
Erin- HAHAHA, JOES HERE!
Morgan- Sam, you don’t have a line here because your character isn’t even in the house yet. Now, Lee, go back over there--
Lacey- This movie SUCKS.
Morgan- Well, dude, it’s just a--
Sam- Are you SURE I can’t have a line?
Erin- JOES HERE!
Morgan- STOP IT!
Jaclyn- Why do you have to keep YELLING at us?
Sam- He won’t give me a line either.
Morgan- Sam, you’ve had the script for 2 months, you know how many lines you have.
Jason- You’re getting leaves on my CARPET.
Lee- Can we just shoot the scene maaaaaan I’m tired…
Jaclyn- Stop WHINING
Erin- JOES HERE! Hahahaha!
Lacey- I’m gonna quit.
Morgan- Alright, everyone, STOP. If we don’t get done, I’m not ordering any pizza.
Lee- WOAH! PIZZA?!
Jason- You better not get pizza on my carpet.
Erin- I don’t really like pizza.
Lacey- You’re ordering breadsticks too. Cause I don’t want any piz-
Sam- Can I have just ONE line?
Morgan- SHUTUP Sam. Your lines are coming up..
Sam- Fine… I just want one line.
Morgan- You have THIRTEEN lines in the end! And a fight scene! Just wait!
Erin- When do we leave?
Jason- I should have brought my couch… We are still using Pokey the Penguin music right? Because I have an idea for that.
Lee- Dude, lets just shoot the movie… I need to get some soda after we’re done..
Morgan- Alright, Lee, go over there by that door. Now, Erin, when he comes in, yell, ITS MASTER SCAR!! Okay?
Erin- I guess.. but it sounds stupid.
Jaclyn- Just do it so we can leave already.
Sam- Is this where I have a line?
Morgan- NO.. Sam.. NO
Jason- I’m still dead, right?
Sam- How come Jason gets to be dead?
Lacey- This is SO boring.. I’m gonna go look upstairs..
Morgan- hang on, what? No Lacey, you’re in this scene man.
Erin- IT’S MASTER SCAR!
Morgan- No! Lee! Not yet! I don’t even have the camera ready!
Erin- Haha…what? HAHA! JOES HERE!
Morgan- Erin will you stop saying that line? You only said it ONCE in the script..
Lacey- (mimicking) Only said once, whatever, look, here we go, JOES HERE.
Jason- I have an idea for after I’m dead at Doctor fear’s Lab. I was Joe right?
Page 2
Morgan- Yes! Let’s shoot this scene though. Now lee, Where the binder?
Lee- The what man?
Morgan- The evil remote thingy.
Lee- Oh yeah, I gave that thing to Jaclyn
Jaclyn- No, No you didn’t.
Lee- I LOVE YOU JACLYN!!
Erin- JOES HERE!
Morgan- STOP! Who has the binder?
Lacey- The what?
Morgan- The evil remote!
Lacey- That’s a stupid name, and WHY are you yelling at me! You JERK.
Morgan- Well who HAS it?
Jason- has what?
Morgan- The BINDER
Erin- What’s TH-
Morgan- THE REMOTE
Erin- Oh yeah, it’s right there
Morgan-…:sighs:: thank you…, Now. Lee, come in yelling about killing Joe.
Erin- JOES HERE!
Jaclyn- SHUTUP
Morgan- ANYWAY… When you do Erin’s gonna say, MASTER SCAR!!! Then you point the remote at her, then freeze so I can do some camera work, Okay?
Lee- Alright man.. let’s do it..
Lacey- Am I dying now?
Morgan- No, you die next.
Lacey- Ugh, Whatever…
Morgan- Okay, on 3.….one….two…
Sam- Wait! Do I have a line?!
Morgan- What?
Erin- MASTER SCAR!
Morgan- No! Wait! STOP!!
Sam- What?
Jason- Am I gonna be laying over there, or am I off camera?
Erin- Can I say something else here? I don’t like this line.
Jaclyn- Just DO it Erin, I want to go eat…This is so boring.
Lee- Jaclyn! I LOVE YOU!
Morgan- No to everything that anyone said. Now go back Lee…and.. let’s go. Camera rolling…one…two.. THREE.
Lee- BWHAHAHAA!!!
Erin- MASTER SCAR!!
Morgan- Okay….now.. STOP…That’s a wrap everyone. Now, only 16 more scenes to go.
Lacey- Good. I quit.
Sam- Not before any of my LINES!
Erin- Joes here!
Morgan- Okay.. well.. we’ll finish later. Les go eat
(everyone agrees)
Erin- But… I don’t even like pizza.
Lee- I LOVE YOU JACLYN!
Morgan- I hate you all. The End

Another day, another bruise on my right elbo.

Smurfy — 2004-05-13T05:05:00-05:00

Feel free to leave threatening/ or comedic messages in my message(s) section, dawg.

Welllllll

Let's get started on another fine magical day, on my equally amazing MINDSAY WEBLOG.

Woosh.

Okay, so like, dawg, I got on the bus this morning, and lol it wuz lyk, Kwiet!

Starting now:

Yes, today was a day. A day for any day, to be a day, that is.

I took the aformentioned play to school, to discover that everyone wanted yo do it because my group has 7 people and there are seven characters. Hot diggity . I don't know if that will show up in italics...but it might.

I got Brian playing lee...Megan playing Jaclyn... LeeAnn playing erin,
Derricka the amazing black chick of reading is playing Lacey...I got Riley playing Jason. (whom he sucks at portraying) and Brielle playing Sam. Ha...Girl playing sam..

Then, as I played ULTIMATE FRISBEE, I was called..to the OFFICE.

So I walk in, with my sexy cool charm, and they are all like, OMG U GO TO TELFORDS OFFICE RIGHT NOW,

And I'm like,

Oh man am I screwed.

But NAH, just a RANDOM DRUG TEST.

(no details necessary, right?)

After that I ate my last lemon head and proceeded to ask Brittany if she brought the holy grail today,

Which she didn't. The turkey. But I forgot Mr. Derby too..so..::longwinded::

And..Hmm.. I think I'm out of things to say?

Maybe...maybe...

I DID ORDER CHINESE FOOD!

And Melissa DID bring the cool music video DVD....so...hmm...

I'm gonna do do/watch that.

Catch you on the other side of the Chicken Scallion Sucka's.

Ah..Delicious...Delicious..Chinese..

Smurfy — 2004-05-13T06:05:00-05:00

Man. The chinese guys sure make one heckuva Chinese dish. I figured the italians would better chinese food..but...Whatever...Brittany is making scones....Hahahahahaha....Ah..man...haha....whew...
China Wok, doth indeed, Roxor, as does "The Hardest Button to Button", by the great ol' band, The White Stripes. ::bass::

Isn't it funny when people forget their middle names?
I think it is. Some people acutally do that. >D.

Man..but..ah..
I think I'm going to run an amateur film contest at school next year..I'm gonna bring that up in the baord meeting..since..I'm in the baord now...Bwa, ha HA

I just feel like taking this to (NAME REMOVED TO PREVENT CONFLICT AND NUCLEAR BOMBS) and saying:
Hahahahaha. Idiot. LOOKS LIKE IM NOT THAT Unprofessional AFTER ALL EH MATE? I love being evil like that.

and I pronounced Nuclear, "Nuke-Leer", for all you crazy BushSpeakin' democrats.

I'm gonna stop writing to all you guys there bored at home now. Enjoy Thursday, for it is coming up soon, to the day we all fear, hate, and loathe..the day..er..week..
We call....

Exams...

Ba dum da ding. Looks like another..Friday, dawg.

Smurfy — 2004-05-14T04:05:00-05:00

Yo man. Today was wiggy. Today, you see, was Friday . I mean, REALLY. We get yearbooks monday..and..no way man, I finished my MATH TEST. TEST! Thats INSANE! And no less,

the play, was SMASHING . I got, like, laughing, and like, "Lol"'s, all that shiznit.

I was very happy.

Soemwhat because Riley wasnt there to flirt with brielle and get them off page, and Steven could...do almost a good a jason as jason can. ODDLY ENOUGH.

Then we dissed Mr. Gayrrod on the way home, for generally just beign retarded as usual.
That was cool.
I also ate a dorito.

Ah man...we played like..Hacky..Bottle today.. because our sac's were, alas, gone. No SAC'S.
;-;.

But..ah...I got like...17 pages of english work to do...Some..science..STUFF... I made like, a 50. a FIFTY. THATS INSANE. DAWG.

BonziBuddy: I dont really remember much after the idea.
BonziBuddy: I'm kinda like Kilgore Trout that way.
BonziBuddy: He was a character in Vonnegut's novels, a completely unknown science fiction writer. He has some of the most insightful, crazy ideas, and he puts them into his books.
BonziBuddy: But his prose SUCKS.

Aye!

And then, good heavens, Brittany didn't bring the holy grail, again . HAhahahaha....>D..Scones...

I'll make sure to enter nore of my unreadable thoughts later, yo.

And to all my haterz out there, dawg, xD... U AWL SUK. >D

So, like every other entry before, I'm, "running off" so to speak.

It bez Saturday. the day...of..."The Plan" Dot, Dot, Dot.

Smurfy — 2004-05-15T01:05:00-05:00

So Dot, Dot, Dot. I KNOW WHO YOU MIGHT BE. Anyway,

Looks like today is gonna be a good day to use "The Plan"

And I will too.

Looks like a movie theater trip is in store for Smurfy. After a through investigation of the Smurfmobile. Of course. Man that smurfmobile rocks. After some good Hax0ring it shall be good. Also I ate Spaghetti-o's.

I ran into Toni Sacco up at Lowe's Food's today, (DOUBLE APOSTROPHE) and I talked to her for a good...15 minutes...During which time she accidentily flicked me off..twice. ::Sneaky stereotypical emoticon:::

I also realized I know alot of biploar pshypneumatic Traumatized children who have problem understanding simple logic like, What, EH? and GET THE HECK OFF MY LAWN.

Kind of like that game on the hall of cheese near disaster labs I was reading about.
>D

And so, with a snort and a chuckle,
This guy,
Is fastening his buckle.
HIS SEAT BUCKLE

BRACE FOR SUNDAY IMPACT.
~ Smurfy J. Fox.

I..seem to be..ready...

Smurfy — 2004-05-15T05:05:00-05:00

Looks like it's t-minues 60 minutes until departure time..for..
"The Plan" .

And so the mental breakdown begins...

Will we be successful?
Or will they catch us on the cameras....
Will we make it into place? Or will we be caught and apprehended...

Psh, they don;'t even care.
Expulsion is always an option..but...
Will we succeed? TUNE IN NEXT TIME, AND ALL WILL BE REVEALED..ABOUT...

The Plan.

Fate...Fate..Fate is Bipolar except theres no good swings.

Smurfy — 2004-05-16T04:05:00-05:00

Okay. Yes.

"The Plan", as we say,

ah..
It sorta got screwed..
BY FATE

Okay, heres the "Scoop"

So We're like..Waiting..
Waiting for the cue to commence the plan.
And we just like, do it.
WE RUN FROM VAN HELSING TO KILL BILL 2.

See, cause there was this fat suited guy.
He was there
When he left,
WE CHARGED.
Unfrotunetlly fate screwed us over.
We forgot to look out for the OTHER guys.
Or girls.
Whatever.
So we're like.
There.
IN THE SEATS.
And then,

"uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....Could we like, see your tickets PLZ"

"er..yeah..we need to leave don't we"

"Hahaha...Yeah. Like NOW."

"*#@@!."

So we watched VAN HELSING.

"DO YOU LIKE TO FLY?!!! BWHAHAHAHAHA"

Man that movie sucked.

Okay so like, 10 hours later after frankenstein went super sayian or something, we like.
Tried to leave.
WRONG
Fate screwed me over AGAIN.

My car died.
Like,
There.

HAHAHAHA Fate said, laughing and spitting.

(@#&#@ I said, just spitting.

So you see children,

This is what happens when Fate hates your *(@&#* Guts.

LIVE AND LEARN I ALWAYS SAY!

Until later, like, tonight,

Smurfy and his good friend, Fate.

*(@&@( FATE

&#*(@@& ESSAYS.

Smurfy — 2004-05-17T08:05:00-05:00

End of the year..one more essay to make it through..but we did get yearbooks today. Yearbooks, man, I LOVE yearbooks
signatures make me feel very good about myself.
all the SMURFY ROCKS and stuff.
It's always a smug day.
I met with the drama board, Ill fill that in later.
I don't have much time..TRILLIAN FROM MELISSA IS NEEDED.
While we are planning THE PLAN 2

...I did manage to get my car back.
Cost 150 bucks, but, woohoo....Suckas...I got my car BACK.
and the radio even doesnt smoke now. Thats really cool!

I wish I had more time to chat, but Im out,

ESSAY TIME!

HYUK!

-Smurfy

It's no longer monday, in fact, it's not even wednesday.

Smurfy — 2004-05-18T04:05:00-05:00

Looks like 8 days left of ...the...intolerably evil freshman year. Aye. At least I've got a yearbook to handle all the extended grief over exams. and over 40 signatures included! It's crazy man. Crazy!

I had somethign i wanted to say, but I forgot what it was..

Had a good day at hacky-sack period today. We were all "chilled" Like, sitting around enjoying the good weather and talking..and..just..talking. Very relaxing. Then I threatened Brittany because she keeps being stubborn. About being stubborn. It's those red-heads.

Then I yelled "PUNCH YOU IN THE BACK" to this guy who gave me a paper cut. It made people..like..

Laugh.

and Mrs blake go

CHILDREN SETTLE THE (@#&@* DOWN BEFORE I GIVE YOU ALL EVIL GRADES BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I hate her stupid voce. ITS LIKE A HAMMER IN MY EARS.

The Mr Thmopson, who couldnt figure out what the heck he was doing, plunged our stupid world history class into debate over the Iraq war AGAIN.

SO I just got out my cd player and grooved to smash motuh for the next 45 minutes.

Realxation again!

And then I came here, wrote THIS, and decided that i should stop.

Post me some groove's dawg.

Smurfy; gone and left.

Pollster.

Smurfy — 2004-05-18T08:05:00-05:00

Entered at the magic place we call school.

Smurfy — 2004-05-19T08:05:00-05:00

I'm.."At" School. In the "Lab". Sitting here in business watching "Final Destination". I have realzied after seeing tis movie 6 times, that this guy is in fact, insane. Regardless of whatever anyone in the movie said. DONT @*@#&^@* WITH DEATHS PLAN YOU (@&@#(@*( KID. - Morgue guy.

He got mad at his incessant tendency to not die.
Poor kid.

We're alomost at th epoint where that chick gets hit by the bus so...I'm..gonna go watch it.
Check in later yo.

Smurfy in room 911
-SMURFY

Na da da da DUN

Smurfy — 2004-05-19T09:05:00-05:00

Looks like it's one day closer to the end of time. Or exam week, whatever.

I'm preparing myself by going through self-torture things each night. Like, last night, I pretended I was in the amth exam and I pulled out clumps of my hair and didnt blink for 45 minutes. I think my contacts melted. Aye...

*@##&@* Math exam.

And so I will sit and wait, preparing for death.
And trying to get my one LAST signature, that I really really want. You know who you are. >D.

But for now, I'm gonna go prepare for my egnlish exam by sitting on my arm for 50 minutes until it falls so asleep I need to throw dry ice on it. because english bores me like that.

Stick in there guys, 6 days left...6...I..think..Possibly 16. Maybe even 4 or 2. I can't remember.

But 14 days until that groovy new harry potter movie comes out...thats gonna be fun.

ADIOS FOR THE 2nd TIME.

-Smurfy, not in room 911.

Final Destination: Day III

Smurfy — 2004-05-20T08:05:00-05:00

Whats-his-face is getting drowned by the tree now..close to the end..CHAPTER ESCAPE FROM DEATH. It's a good chapter.
Like ramen noodles.

And I just forgot whata a star wars T-wing fighter looks like from Http://theforce.net . Stupid memory. OOH! METAL BAR THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD. ALmsot time for CHAPTER 6 MONTHS LATER.

Aye.

The Stare at Someone until they run away plan didnt work because Emily sucks at working with my sneaky plans. YOU PEOPLE MUST REALIZE IM GOOD AT BEING SNEAKY. I mean, I just KNOW... sneaky

It's crazy.
Like ramen.

oh..car's on fire now. GENIUS DIALOG:

"YOUR CAR WILL EXPLODE MAYBE"
"I'LL DO THIS AND CHEAT DEATH...FOR THE LAST TIME...YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO"

"I'll always be ehre, in the power lines"

Woops, car exploded. Gas does that.

Is alex dead? NAH. He just got electrocuted with 81st degree burns. Any ol' kid could survive that. Being blown up is just a fun thing kids do these days.

I have decided to take Kat's advice. I'm furthermore going to be a critic of everything. It pays 6.35 a week.

But now Im gonna wish I had sundrop and food lion pizza.
Like Ramen.

~Smurfy in room 911.

D00000d!

Smurfy — 2004-05-20T09:05:00-05:00

WERE WATCHING FINAL DESTINATION 2!!!!

HOT DOG!

This will be sure to roxor. WHich I doubt. I'll complain about it later.

My fortune, which is funny.

Smurfy — 2004-05-20T09:05:00-05:00

Q: How many members of the U.S.S. Enterprise does it take to change a
light bulb?
A: Seven. Scotty has to report to Captain Kirk that the light bulb in
the Engineering Section is getting dim, at which point Kirk will send
Bones to pronounce the bulb dead (although he'll immediately claim
that he's a doctor, not an electrician). Scotty, after checking
around, realizes that they have no more new light bulbs, and complains
that he "canna" see in the dark. Kirk will make an emergency stop at
the next uncharted planet, Alpha Regula IV, to procure a light bulb
from the natives, who, are friendly, but seem to be hiding something.
Kirk, Spock, Bones, Yeoman Rand and two red shirt security officers
beam down to the planet, where the two security officers are promply
killed by the natives, and the rest of the landing party is captured.
As something begins to develop between the Captain and Yeoman Rand,
Scotty, back in orbit, is attacked by a Klingon destroyer and must
warp out of orbit. Although badly outgunned, he cripples the Klingon
and races back to the planet in order to rescue Kirk et. al. who have
just saved the natives' from an awful fate and, as a reward, been
given all lightbulbs they can carry. The new bulb is then inserted
and the Enterprise continues on its five year mission.

D00d!!!!

Smurfy — 2004-05-20T09:05:00-05:00

Man, that was the WILDEST pile-up EVER. CARS FIRE WATER COFFEE! AND A GUY ON A MOPED! It was WAY Groooooovy!!

Wooh, boy, 5 entries..

Smurfy — 2004-05-20T08:05:00-05:00

What a crazy day. Started Final Destination 2, saw a guy get impaled by a ladder, the coolest car wreck scene in any movie, EVER, and all that jazz.

Emily did fail in our plot at staring at people, but she's all far out like that.

Looks like out "The plan"®™ Logo was indeed, NOT destroyed.

I planned out my summer, so I'm gonna be gone from like, June 12th to July 4th. SO LONG FOOLIOS! And after that I'm elaving mid july for a week or so. Nya.

Typo's are your enemy children.

So I'm like..pondering...

Do I eat a massive amount of various foods, or one heaping load of spaghetii-o's. Im thinking both of them.

Or ramen.

I did manage to find the entire version of that...video of that guy from iraw that they killed over there, beheaded. That's mega-wicked man. That was pure evil, and I'm not even sarcastic for once there. Anyone who watches this will have respect for our soldiers and civilians over there, there's just no way not too. That was just sick man, sick.

On that incredibly sour note, I'm going to finish posting for today.

EXPECT MORE ROOM 911 HAPPINESS LATER!

Remember, pigeons equal death.

Smurfy — 2004-05-21T09:05:00-05:00

According to the great philosophical movuie, Final Destination 2, if you see pigeons, you friggin BETTER not go near them. Or you'll get your body squshed to a greasy street mold. Dentists also equal death. So does newspaper, and ladders, and watches. STAY IN THE ROOM WITH THE FLASHLIGHT. Also potted meat is poison

W00tity w00t, w00t.

Smurfy — 2004-05-21T08:05:00-05:00

Okay, well, I think Chad lost it. He got all....poor chad. He's gone insane. SMURFY IS STILL SMURFY CHAD. When you revolutionize the planet give smurfy Korea.

Anyway

ONTO MY DAILY BORING BLOGGED LIFE

haha...blogged...

Alright, so

I like, kept watching, like, like, like, like, Final Destination 2, like, today.

Then I worked for several hours slept on the bus while Jon fat kid jon talked about cars for ,God knows, the 4 billionth day in a friggin row.

So I slept.

Then I woke up!
And lo, behold, there laid theron my kitchen table a note of POWERDOM:

"MORGAN WE ARE GONE AND NOT HERE

-MOM"

Not quite getting what she was trying to say, I panicked and did nothing.

Then she called and was like,

"OMG MORGAN U NEED TO COME WEED THIS GARDEN BYE"

So I got in the smurfmobile and drove to grandma's and weeded her garden raked up the 5 wheelbarrow fulls of weeds, not weed, to the woods there in front of the house, and grandma bought us supper from LIBERTY FAMILY RESTUARANTê

Then i found out ol' ********* is now ****************************************. (BLEEPED! EGAD!!!)

I just like the asterisk key. Deal wid et.

so, I think, in essence, is that My math teacher stile sucks, *************** is ************************************************************************. Chad just decided to destroy the world, I'm extremely thirsty, and also I am wearing a shirt with spaghetti cauce on it.

And she doesn't even have a vcr. Double-you-tee-eff.

>D

Also I am harassing people.

And..uh...man I had something else.
Oh well.

"The Plan 2: Wussies Rock" Looks to be screwed by fate from the get go.

****ing fate.

Blast it, what WAS I going to write?!

Ah, screw it. POST ONB MY BLOG AN DBE HAPPY CHILDREN

~Mr. McSmurfy

Looks like its POLL DAY

Smurfy — 2004-05-22T04:05:00-05:00

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Moderate
Schizotypal:	High
Antisocial:	Moderate
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Moderate
Narcissistic:	High
Avoidant:	High
Dependent:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Moderate
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Very Low

Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test

take the emo quiz.created by jessi

Your Superhero Persona by couplandesque
Your Name
Superhero Name	Mullet Man
Super Power	Irresistable Sexuality
Enemy	The Disgruntled Mailman
Mode Of Transportation	Motorcycle
Weapon	Frying Pan

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

Neutral:
Harmony and balance is key. You don't look at the
world in a negative or positive way and you'll
never judge or assume a situation- you just
look at the facts. People like you are peaceful
and accepting.

What color do you see the world in?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're Skittles!!! You have a very interesting
personality, you're so unique. You're the kind
of person who always thinks outside of the box.
You're also a very accepting individual, and
believe in inner beauty.

Which kind of candy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

The Plan 2: WUSSIES ROCK, a SUCCESS!

Smurfy — 2004-05-22T07:05:00-05:00

HAHAHAHAHA! Fate! We hath screwed ye over!

Not us!

HA!

You only TRIED to screw us over, but we just DROVE.
HAHAHA!

So Kill Bill 2 was better than Van Helsing, that's no surprise, but turns out, it answered like, the one question no one knew. THAT OLD GUYS WITH BEARDS CAN KICK ASS. and they also pluck eyes.

But, man.

Man.

I don't think much has happened today, besides finally beating fate, and I don't think much else will.

Enjoy the free day, me groovin's.

-Smurfy.

one more, just for good measure.

Smurfy — 2004-05-22T07:05:00-05:00

Whats does your personality rate from 1-10? by morning_prayer
Your first full name
Your personality rates a	seven
your best quality is	your sense of humor =)
your worst quality is	youre too nice to people
this is because	you are who you are

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

Yeah.

Smurfy — 2004-05-23T04:05:00-05:00

I ate at taco bell. I think that's about it for today. OH AND I WASHED THE SMURFMOBILE. Then it rained. ****ing fate.

I did finally wash that seatbealt buckle that had seemingly been lodged in this greasy spot under the car seat for a few years. possums. But then the windshield wiper broke off. Man, this car hates me.

One last day of normalacy before the end of the world/week/schoolyear/most annoying month ever.

BRACE FOR IMPACT.

Im fire! Hot diggity.

Smurfy — 2004-05-23T04:05:00-05:00

Your element is Fire: Strong, hot tempered,
powerful, and passionate. Well now lets see,
being fire you are quite strong and powerful,
people look up to you greatly and often seek
your protection. You have the ability to gain
many friends and you are always one people can
count on to do what you say you will do. You
are extremely loyal be it friends or family
you'll stick up for them and you are never
willing to put them in a position that could
hurt them. You know what roll you play in life,
leader, and you intend to let people know it.
Not everyone is capable of leadership but you
certainly have the willpower and flare to do
it. You have quite a temper if it shows itself,
one that can often lead you into trouble. Once
your mind is made up there is no changing it
but no one said that was a bad thing.

.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla

Smurfy in 911, yeah dawg, he's back

Smurfy — 2004-05-24T08:05:00-05:00

Some guy just got chopped into 4 pieces, got their head impaled by PBC pipe, and the obnly survivor to the flight 180 crash just blew up. As in, the guy who was dying's emergency battery caught on fire and exploded while the girl walked into the room and her skin melted. so did her body. That was odd. Now whats her face is klling herself in a white van. UDNERWATER.

But no doubt they will get eaten by a massive pirahna fish or mayeb a nuclear sub will explode and make them into superheroes who will be destroyed by a comet.

OR Maybe the fire actaully gave them a powerful SUPERPUNCH attack, which will cause them to explode.

Oh wait no she survived. After she was dead. That's cool.
It always ahppens that way. I miss the exploded girl. Oh well. THEY CHEATED DEATH. See you next time!

Man this movie sucks as abd as the 1st one. WHich is not sucking at all

~Smurfy~

bah dahhhhhhhh DAH.

Smurfy — 2004-05-24T05:05:00-05:00

>D.

Nothing at all happened. nothing.
Unless..NO.

Kat announced sadly that due to problematic problems, she may have to move to California.
This is saddening due to the fact that Kat roxorz.
kat we shall hope it doesn't come that you are able to sing Californication and be serious about it.

Otherwise I thre this Werthers wrapper in melissa's hair 4 times, threw clovers in Natalie's hair 4 times, messed up jordan's hair twice, and on and on the list goes.

It's so aggravating to have to bother people.

Jason apparently died or was stuffed in a locker, he was nowhere to be found.

We're hoping it wasn't chad's ramen. PRONOUNCED RAY-MUN.

Aye.

We took a cool group pic of the "HACKY SACKING GROUP"

Which includes me, carmon, sam (JEW) marion, glen(jamin), some guy named Tim, zach when he doesnt hate us and that upperclass guy no one seems to know the name of.

MORE TO COME WHEN IM NOT YELLING AT KIDS.

ITS A PICTURE OF ME! SMURFY!

Smurfy — 2004-05-24T05:05:00-05:00

OMG WTF STFU MY HEAD!

Smurfy — 2004-05-25T04:05:00-05:00

OMG MY HEAD IS GOING TO DIE!

68 question of pure mortal death.

THATS WHAT THE SCIENCE EXAM IS.

Action mark.

Lawl.

I'm never going to be able to look at science again adn say, "ha, I like science".
NO.
I CANT DO THAT NOW.

Alas.

I am now departing from hence mae howze to my grandma's, to eat her groovy old fashioned southern food. LONG LIVE THE SOUTH. *$^&@*#&#* YANKEES.

So, as the last week of school begins it's final act's, we must say our goodbyes, and our farewells, also our OMG IM GLAD THEY ARE DYING's. Watch out for pigeons.

So, in leaving, I am giving you this quote from the worst movie ever, RETURN TO ZORK.

Will you just go AWAY? I only have ONE milk cow, and she only eats CARROTS. so JUST go AWAY. ::say in irish accent::

Also: >D

-----Smurfy

w00t, w00t, w00t.

Smurfy — 2004-05-25T06:05:00-05:00

As I return, in an effort to move that stupid picture down another notch so this thing resizes again,

I came to the utter realization,

that no matter how many times a day I write on this thing,

No matter how many hours I invest,

I still don't have a blasted thing to say.

Also : XD

I do, however, bleieve that Emoticons are man's best friend. Especially to a man who just ate 6 plates full of rich hearty food, not to leave out banana pudding and hunny butter, not to leave out the fried chicken and biscuits and macaroni and potato salad and green beans...and...and...AND corn on the cob, and slaw! AH! I LOVE SOUTHERN FOOD.

*#&!&!@*! YANKEES.

>D

That's right,

I insulted yankees, and no, NO one is going to marry her, not even the goth guy. SO SHUTUP, HATERZ.

As a last gift to my BELOVED math teacher, I plan on being the biggest pig possible in her last class thursday, for the exam. I am so going to flick her short black midget body off, until her AGONIZINGLY painful AGAONIGly irritating, AGONIZINGLY AGONIZING AGONY. >D

Also One should not read Tv Guide late at night. Those anna nicole ad's sneak up on you. I was sick for hours.

Sigh.
Action marks.

Well, adherring to my startegy of writing absoutely nothing that would make anyone go, AHA! SO THATS WHERE THE HUMIDIFIER WENT!, I'm going to retire for the day now and spam other peoples comment log's.

Have a nice afternoon, and a PLEASENT evening, which is the same thing, but not REALLY . You know how us spazzy kids get. >D

LATER DOG.

Day 2: Exam day over

Smurfy — 2004-05-26T10:05:00-05:00

My last day in room 911....AND ITS NOT WATCHING A MOVIE ABOUT DEAD PEOPLE OR RETARDS!

So the business exam..is over. DAY 2 HAS ENDED. So I'm going to lunch for both periods then leaving. I feel like bothering alot of people, so I probably just will. Enjoy the torment, SUCKERS. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Posting Later,

Smurfy.

The deed, is done. OR ITS JUST BEGGINING.

Smurfy — 2004-05-27T07:05:00-05:00

>D

Algebra I.

OVER.

English.

OVER!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA

*^#@&@ Spybot search and destory.

My exams went well, being that I assumed this was the worst day of my life, but it WUZNAT! LOL!
YAY FOR 14!

>D

Sorry, Needed to do that.

But emily's party sneaks closer. I shall be meeting this new groovy'n some refer to as "Laura". She seems to be groovy..but you NEVER know. Thinks back to that far-out-insane-psycothic girl Will tried to set him up with::

Well, no one can have as big a face as she did,....at least.. I hope not.. oh help me...

ANYWAYZ

Looks like Jason and Mel broke up, and..OMG CHAD AGAIN. ::vomits over ramen::

He overdid the RAMEN . UGH.

DONT CONSIDIER IT CHEATING NOW, TELEVISION MAN!

>D

So, in order to celebrate my victory over the darkside, and algebra, or, whor eally is the same person.

SMURFY IS OUT OF HERE DAWG

hahahaha. I am prone to being EVIL

Smurfy — 2004-05-27T07:05:00-05:00

Demi-Cerberus:
A demi Cerberus is very similar to Cerberus in
appearence but the difference is that a
Demi-Cerberus only has two heads. You are
cruel and inhumane. You lack the food
intentions and sense of being that Cerberus
has. You like to play with peoples emotions
and torture them to the last. You have few
friends because many are scared of you and you
are also prone to violence.

What Mythological Creature Are You (Many Results and Beautiful Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

One more. For good measure

Smurfy — 2004-05-27T07:05:00-05:00

Which Family Guy character are you?

My conversations are bordering pure insanity. Or they sure as heck dont follow any pattern.

Smurfy — 2004-05-27T08:05:00-05:00

Raining SkyFire: 85% (Dixie). Did you have any Confederate ancestors?
Raining SkyFire: YES
citylove2006: lmfao
Raining SkyFire: >D
citylove2006: i got 98% -- Is General Lee your father?
Raining SkyFire: o.o
Raining SkyFire: Serious?
citylove2006: ;]
citylove2006: yeah
Raining SkyFire: OMG I LOVE YOU
citylove2006: no you don't OMG ;[
Raining SkyFire: wutevar.
citylove2006: my boyfriend of two days just dumped me i think ill go slit my wrists & die ;[
citylove2006: .. jk ;]
Raining SkyFire: >D EMO.
citylove2006: XD

Your southern score.

Smurfy — 2004-05-27T08:05:00-05:00

http://www.wrns.com/carlylereplay.shtml

Aye

Smurfy — 2004-05-28T10:05:00-05:00

Does anyone find this journal offensive? it look's like it's offended some people. How has it offended anyone when all it is a clear expression of my thoughts as a journal would be on paper. Yet i have managed to offend some people? I daresay I have not said anything uncalled for, because these are MY thoughts. So if you're reading this, and are somehow offended, I DEEPLY appologize, but isn't getting offended at this like reading a book? Just deal with it. This is bogus...

Word to your mother.

Smurfy — 2004-05-29T11:05:00-05:00

Vanilla Ice, baby.

THIS IS THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE.

If someone ever invites you to watch all 3 of the incredibly b-graded movies, in the line of night of the lviving dead, man, TAKE THE OPPRUTUNITY TO LAUGH AT SOEMONE WHOS LIFE IS WORSE TAHN YOURS.

>D

Nothing better than food lion pizza, sundrop, and a b-grade zombie movie. Again, >D

But,a s of now, In preparation for the partê this afternoon, I'm watching SUPERMAN THE GUY FROM KRYPTON with my cousins who are up from wilmington.

Sad face. :______________________(

Superman from the 1910's, not suprman from the 1980's. And I hate the 80's.

But I think I'm gonna go pop in woody woodpecker now.

ALTERZ

Word

Smurfy — 2004-05-29T11:05:00-05:00

S	Saintly
M	Meek
U	Unnatural
R	Realistic
F	Funny
Y	Young

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

Man. What a RUSH

Smurfy — 2004-06-02T05:06:00-05:00

Well. After an absence it's good to see people ahve still been coming everyday. Makes a man proud to be a groovy blogger. BLOGGGGGGGGG.

That word just never gets old, I swear.

Well, let's get started shall we.

SCHOOLS OUT

EXAMS OVER
SMURFY ROXORED THEM

I got a b in algebra.

ME! A B!

IN ALGEBRA!

That is in SANEEEEE

Like people who instead of saying macaroni say "MAC"

Which bugs me for some reason.

Idiot people.

I found this cool magent that said

I HATE EVERYONE!
(picture of a guy in a suit smiling)

I thought it fit me well. I may purchase it at a later date.

But doing that would require me going to the mall.

MALL.

UGH.

MALL.

The mall. The place where humanity ends and possibly evil stores and zombies arise.

Which makes me skip that topic completely to move onto zombie movies.

When one is givien the opprutunity to say, watch zombie movies.

One must accept.

But when one is given the chance to go to say, a party, where, by chance, a fellow by the name of CARL I-SUCK-AT-LIVING-MANNER is attending, you certainly best not attend, for he is, for lack of better words, REALLY FRIGGIN RETARDED.

let's replay this scene in order to make you understand his retardedness.

::fade into cool wavy sequence::

(Smurfy is filming David, who went abso-freakin-lutely insane and began making alot of odd noises and acting out epiosdes of beavis and butthead. No lie)

HAHAHA. LOOK. HAHAHA. HE SAID BUNGHOLE. HAHAHAHA. LOOK.

(Suddenly, Some great pain enters smurfy's leg)

OW! CURSES! CURSE THE WATERS! WHAT HATE HIT SMURFY LEG! OW!

Carl I-Suck-Manner: Dude I don't like people who use video-cameras.

(Kicks smurfy again)

(Smurfy limps off yelling about how gay carl is)

::end wavy echo sequence:::

UGH.
CARL.

And what a lame name

MANNER...

hahaha..

manner...

HAHA.....

Anywho...ah...

This is the safest place to be...or..did I already post on this. I can't remember.

My opprutunity to get a job at the beach may have just diminished due to the fact my relatives are going on vacationt hemselves, preventing any prolonged visits by smurfy himself.

Also, typos suck.

And now, after ranting a weeks worth of unposted blogs (BLOG! HAHAHAHAHA) which turned out to be only two days worht of stuff half of which I had already posted,

Smurfy bids thee,

farewell.

"Therefore young one's love lies not in their heart, but in their eyes"

As usual, I TOOK TESTS AND POLLS

Smurfy — 2004-06-02T06:06:00-05:00

How net savvy are you??

Once upon a time

Smurfy — 2004-06-02T08:06:00-05:00

There was a lad by the name of Tim in a magical land known as ZARGON.

Zargon only had one cow, in allllll the magical land.
And possibly a few McDonalds and maybe even an Arby's.

But we don't care about that cow, because it only ate carrots.
Nor do we care about resturants.

STUPID LOW CARB FOOD.

So, after bill or tim or whoever it was slayed a beast by the name of MUTANT STRING,

He lived in an equally magical town called FLORGON.

Now Florgon had two cows, so we won't worry about them,

But the moral of this lesson is that:

The fewer cows your town has, the more chance you have of surviving a nuclear holocaust.

because see, it's not about COWS, or bob or jimmy, or whatever his name was,

It's about the cold war.

And the cold war is NOT something we should kid about,
Especially in front of an english teahcer or perhaps your uncle who's name might be Zimbo, and might have been from Japan during the time when Japan ruled the fish market.

Around say, 1987.

Man I hated the 80's.

Now uh..What I was saying..was...like..

Cows who eat carrots are bad.

And Low carb sandwiches are just burgers wrapped in lettuce.

Call me crazy,

But I hate those stupid low carb sandwiches.

-The story about the cows, a novel, by: Smurfy.-

Tired, sleepy, and writing in this blog for some reason

Smurfy — 2004-06-04T07:06:00-05:00

Wake up at 10. GO shopping, Buy stuff. Build tables. Get yard sale stuff ready, build more tables. Carry wood. Carry more wood. Carry wood back. Wander around, plant tomatoes, water garden. Sleep. FOR THREE HOURS. AGH.

Wake up at 5:00.

Go to work.
Come home at 4:30.

Do work.

Build another stupid table.
Carry 26 boxes of yard sale stuff up a hill.

Don't cary 4 boxes that had rats and some sort of giant cockroac in them.

Keep ferret from killing herself in a mousetrap.
Try to kill ferret. Stupid cat.

Wander around.

Write in my blog.

Go build another table.

My work,

is done.

But man am I getting buff. Hot diggity.

The Novel of my life, part II

Smurfy — 2004-06-04T07:06:00-05:00

----Chapter two----
The backstory

Now Jim, who had lived on a farm in neptune his whole life, had waited for his turn to be a superhero.

The superhero's lived on mercury, for unknown reasons.
They probably just thought mercury sounded sexy.

Well, Thomas or jimmy, I can't remember, he decided that his superpower would be,

TURNING INTO AN ULTRA POWERFUL SUMO WRESTLER.

Now of course, the evil supervillain aggency, PETA, was fighting against him.

Curse that peta.

Well, Uncle Sam or matthew, whatever, he was anxious to destory peta with some sort of gamma ray/anti matter salad fork.

BUT THERE WAS NO TIME.

There was a nuclear war between space factions 6 & 7, and the planet of PluSat. This was after pluto and saturn collided and the french decided all their women were evil for not shaving their armpits.

Those crazy french.
TO BE CONTINUED

The story of my life, Part III, made with 100% real memory.

Smurfy — 2004-06-06T02:06:00-05:00

Wanderings

Screw tim, this episode is focusing on smurfy.

Take that...jake..or...Kyle..whatever your name is.

My wanderings.
A story of the Smurf.

I wander around aimlessly alot.
As you might will know, this causes starnega nd marvelous things.

Like my discovery that dead things float on my pond, and live ones don't. that's a story for another day. or perhaps just to keep me out of jail.

Anyway.

So, one day, Smurfy wandered
And he wandered.

And I heard an odd sound, one that sounded, to me, like "A dying dog" For whatever reason.

Now I looked up, into the trees from the gulley, and I beheld a very odd sight, which I have not encountered again.

It was a umongous DEATHBIRD

This bird cleared over the tops of the trees in a mere second.

But it floated through trees like a shadow! IT WAS A GIANT DEATHBIRD.

One of a kind I always said.

And then, upon creating enough bravery to enter the woods, the realm of GIANT DEATHBIRD, I simply walked through the dying dog noises and proceeded to the field. Where I sort of walked for 4-19 minutes after drinking a CODE RED MOUNTAIN DEW.

Curse that soda.

Now after this I heard a strange roaring sound, as a cat. Or perhaps a gopher.

BUT IT WAS A FOUR-WHEELER

Those stupid kids

RIDING IN MY FIELD

So smurfy got vicious.

I walked to edge of the woods and STARED at them.

They srot of started riding towards me so I searched out shelter in the wilderness.

Kind of like that time when kyle psuhed me through a window and I ran to the math building.

THAT TO IS ANOTHER STORY.
(And sam's version sucks)

So, they stop, and look into the woods, but Im in a tree. and then they ride off nto the sunset. AND I CHEERED

Then they came back with another four-wheeler, so I sort of just left.

Stupid kids.

So the moral of TODAYS story is:

When faced with GIANT DEATHBIRDS and stupid kids, ne should challenge the deathbirds, and just stare at kids. Because they suck. AND GIANT DEATHBIRDS ROXOR.

The end of part III

Smurfy.

Screw you bill. Or Robert. Whatever your name is.

I forgot EVERYTHING I might have written.

Smurfy — 2004-06-06T02:06:00-05:00

Mindsay was downa gain yesterday.

I grow bothered by their lack of good serverness

AND CURSE MY TYPOS.

I'm wearing overalls and a pocket watch for some reason.

But it's sexy.

I have 7 days left, and I shall be posting sparingly for 3 weeks.

VACATION TIIIIIIIME
But I'm doing one of thsoe annoying countdowns like everyone does.

Stupid countdowns.

I thought of alot of stuff to write, but I just forgot it all I think.

Beware, this fall,

SMURFY IS GOING TO CAST SOME HOTT NEW MOVIES, STRAIGHT FROM PHOENIX SHADOW PRODUCTIONS!

~.o

get ready. these WONT suck.

So yesterday, Im having like.
This yardsale.

And you know

After I carred 147 boxes up a hill and unpakced them all.
I friggin made 14 dollars.

Stupid yard sales.

At least it bought me a milkshake.

Last time I made 68 dollars selling old pokemon cards. Alas, it's not a fad anymore. So I have 300 pieces of nothing sitting in my closet in a box.

Stupid fad's.

STUPID YARDSALE

STUPID BOXES

UGH.

Although, next monday, I may be watching CHILDREN OF TH NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD.

Sounds groovy.
AND HIP.

Also cat's who are named ferret do not make good feet cushions as you recieve third degree...uh...bites or something.

-.-,,,...

Anyway.

I'm pretty sure Im done rambling for now.

WORD TO YOUR MOTHER.

-Smurfy.

Three updates for the price of SEVEN

Smurfy — 2004-06-06T03:06:00-05:00

Poseidon

?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Okay, so you get FOUR updates for the price of a case of salmon

Smurfy — 2004-06-06T03:06:00-05:00

Last one, I swear

Smurfy — 2004-06-06T03:06:00-05:00

What stupid celebrity are you destined to kill? by daydreamer8852
Name
Birthdate
You killed
With a
On	February 14, 2022

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

OH THANK GOD.

YES.

I KILLLLLED HER..I KILLLLLED HER....

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
DIE MEAN GIRLS DIE

Continuing the saga of Tim. part IV

Smurfy — 2004-06-07T02:06:00-05:00

JIM
the incredible saga
PART IV
(That's four in romanish)
>D

When we last left our hero, he was getting ready to enter the time/space portal on PluSat. Because I like words like that.

Now John was a vicious hero. He often ate sandwiches with nothing but mayonaise on them. Jimmy or Tim, I think his name is, would often Swim along the POOL OF ACID On jupiter.

The pool of aicd was just a fancy name they gave a pool of acid. Those crazy jupiterians.

Well, Tim decided he was going to enter a beauty contest in order to win a BLUE CROCODILE diamond. The Blue croc had magical properites. It allowed people to sing karaoke without embarassing his entire planet.

And he needed to do that in order to win the karaoke cotnest to prevent the krypton people from blowing up his planet. or maybe it was so he could destroy a local wal-mart.

No one really cares about wal-mart on Jupiter or Uranus (HAHAHAHAHA) anyway.

Does anyone on saturn care about wal-mart or nuclear subs?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME IN THE INTERGALACTIC SPACE COW ROUNDUP

Next time, in the huge and spacecd out adventures of PECOS JIMBO...or...TIM..®

Until then

Later, Space beauty contest guy.

Entry 51

Smurfy — 2004-06-07T03:06:00-05:00

It's like area 51 only LEGAL

How insane is that.
make sure to check back 6-17 times a day for more updates.

Mkay then

LETS START
-----------------

Smurfy woke up.
The clock of timing displayed to smurfy that it was 1 pm.
Being it wasn't 12, I was aggravated that I could have slept an extra 60 minutes.
How Screwy is that.

So I sneak into the so-called "Kitchen" and eat a wonderful meal

A meal of peanut butter crunch

Go Cap'n, Go.

Then I hopped into my Smurfmobile (A car, actually)
And wooshed it up to Grandmas house where she fed me again.

How awesome is that.

Thena fter moving a lawnmower around in certain odd patterns ancient civilaizations developed, I was able to mow the "grass"

Then I bid everyone farewell and jumped into the smurfmobil, lsitening to Learn to Fly by whatstheirface.

Once I returned home, I fed the dachsund, got the mail, moved the mower, Moved my feet, put a new license plate on the smurfmobile (GRVYSMURFY)
>D. personalized for extra hottness.

I'm now here, contemplating the word "Blog"

What the heck is up with that word, "Blog"

it's like, hey, BLOG, what are you? A pronoun? A messed up adjective? What?

And then BLOG is like: OMG WUT U R LYK sOoOoO TARDED lol.okay.so.today nuthin happing.o well lol.lol.lol.

The you sort of vomit, and click off of "Blog" In order to access "FREE VIAGRA FOR WOMEN" Links. I hate pop-up ad's.

Anyway.

Catch you on the other side of the blog (WHAT IS IT?) chill'uns.

Later.

~Smurfy

HAHAHAHA! AOL IS DEAD

Smurfy — 2004-06-08T06:06:00-05:00

HA!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

I killed aol!

Wait, who killed satan's spawn?
Smurfy did!

Hot diggity.

Well see,

first off AOL is actually spelled,

AOHELL

They just like to trick you.
And their slogan is

WE HATE YOU
SERIOSULY™

They even have the "TRADEMARK" icon there.

Good heavens, It's GONE.

Okay, thats enough, let's move on.

There will be no SmurfoStory today due to lack of imagination, sorry for the inconcvebekivinevebenevece.

it's this rain, it always gets me like that.

Blasted rain.

I did get a new email address for anyone intrested in EMAILING smurfy

Smurfy@Triad.rr.com

Spam me, and thou shalt be dead.

My spaghetii-o's are cooking now. As you can tell by my more then regular pointless rambling theres not much happening.

besides typo's.

or typographical error, sorry.

Well, I woke up about 11 today, and noticed something odd.
Something very very very not good, odd.

As I was in my tired stupor, I seemingly forgot to shut my room door all the way.

There was a ferret in my room.

And not a normal ferret

My CAT ferret.

This..horribly vicious...FURBALL OF DOOM.

See previous entries for more on this evil THING.

Well,

She did manage to ruin these items:

My sheet, as it had an odd looking SLASH in it.

My carpet had several fresh tons of ferret fur on it.

A magazine in my floor is now beyond unrecognizable, and oh dear, my pasta is on fire.

Have a good afternoon, Im going to put out the kitchen.

Smurfy, the guy who killed AOL.

>D

LATER.

One quiz, for the lovely.

Smurfy — 2004-06-08T07:06:00-05:00

Take the quiz: "What instrument are you?"

Bass
You are a Bass. My kind of person. You hold things in place because that is your job you are the most important member of the band. People do not give you enough credit they should but they don't.

Today is the beggining of the middle aprt of the beggining of the 2nd chapter!

Smurfy — 2004-06-09T02:06:00-05:00

Don't ask. Anyway.

Today has been relatively normal, speaking for my life which isn't much in the way of normalacy to begin with.

Late last night I began writing down idea's for future movies/plots/random quips that might be groovy

-Mr. Derby and the beauty contest
-Mr. Derby strikes back with a ninja sword
-Mr. Derby and the pizza commerical
-Rocketman's adventures with low-carb food
-170 ways to kill people on low carb diets
-The nursing home of DOOM
-The Smurfinator

Out of those pockets of insanity, I do believe I might have 2 or 3 good idea's. By good I mean slightly tolerable.

Of course I still have to make my PHONEX SHADOW Logo.

Stupid art skills.

But as I prepare to make my ROCKETMAN: THE ULTIMATE EDITION Movie, I often become so excited by my thoguths I can't remember to write them down.

I always know when I have a good idea, because I start talking to myself alot. I'm kind of an odd person, you realize.

But the days are counting down to my departure for somewhere beyond these walls.

Next Sunday, you can kiss you're sanity hello, as You won't have much in the way of "Blog's" to make you lose it. My blogs anyway.

Which brings me to point number..uh...7 or 12.

What in the heck is BLOG.

Total Knowledge:

Blog.
Web Log

A diary or journal of personal information, and or catalogue of data collected for use outside of your own mind.

A clear outpost for the declaration of ones one knowledge, whch is a relief in these days of petty lawsuits and politcal correctness.

Now if anyone thinsk I didn't write that, raise your hand and poke yourself in the eye.

Just because I SOUND retarded, doesn't mean I THINK ...uh..What was I saying again?

Anyway.

All that blathering is supposed to help me figure out what a BLOG is. Is it some kind of messed up noun? Or perhaps it's an adverb of some kind.

ONLY ~~THE DICTIONARY~~ TIME WILL TELL

So until possibly later today,

This has been a presentation of

SMURFY™

hahaha...trademark!®

hahaha..copyright...(I forgot the code for REGISTERED, I appologize, jeez, just deal with it.)

When for the good of a human, one must RECIEVE EXCALIBUR.

Smurfy — 2004-06-10T06:06:00-05:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA,.....

Ah.

Oh, sorry.

Why am I even updating today. I have no idea.

Children of the living dead has arrived at the Jason Sir's house.

Other than that.

Feast on this desert of lame words.

because I can't think of anything to write.
So I will leave you with this..strange..riddle..

What's almost blank and says later at the end?

-Later

Rolling along, like a cheese wheel.

Smurfy — 2004-06-11T01:06:00-05:00

Woosh.

The smurfy is here.

So I was driving around earlier, in the almighty smurfmobile, and by chance, I seemed to pass 5 possums, 1 groundhog, and what resemebled some sort of bird.

Kind of odd?
No.
No, seriously, no.

But does anyone know what the legal driving speed is for driving behind idiots?

5!

FIVE!

FIVE????

Idiots.
IT'S OBVIOUSLY 15.

But tonight, I will dine on chicken and dumplings.

>D

Fear the southern fried dumplings and gravy you foolish YANKEES

Yes, I said YANKEES

So sue me, YANKEES

Yankees.

That's enough, thankyou.

Okay, Well,

I have but a few days left before my marvelous trip to away from here.

Bask in the glory of my suntan.

That's right.

IM TAN.

TAN.

Not "Peach"

Or "TANGERINE"

or even "BRICK RED"

But "Tan"

You know that color you made all the white people with when you were little.

The one that made them all look like thye were dead.

"tan"

What an odd word tan is, you know?

I'm making an odd word list.

1. BLOG
2. Tan
3. That other one I cant remember

But enough's enough, I'm out of here suckahs.

Catch you on the dark side of the moon.

BUT FIRST,

hmm..

Should I write an angsty poem?

Mmmm...

yeah.

Softly, gently,
I hear you calling
So far away,
But so close to my heart...
You've always been there,
yet so far away.
I can hold you as close,
as I ever could hope,
but still, I will know,
You're soul is away.
I could dream and I could wish
And I have, I have wished
That you could be here,
instead of so far away.

Not my best, but I wanted to write something.
Hope it doesn't sound to emo.
But see,

not emo.
ANGST.

It's totally different.

Later,
Smurfy.

My theories on wal-mart from a post. FEAR WALMART

Smurfy — 2004-06-11T02:06:00-05:00

Red. (haha meghan!)
Well, me and my mom are about to go to Wal-mart. Thats a great store. Everything is cheap! Just as it should be. :-) I have no idea what I want to do today though. After I get home that is. I have a weird feeling that this is going to be an univentful day. Ah well, time goes on...Ryans poem that he wrote was very heart wrenching. Especially since it was about my sister. I don't even know if they talk about the situation. I don't even know if they're still friends. but i guess its really none of my business. I think I'm about to get my "pay check". haha. See ya kids.

-Ames

Mood: hum dum
Song: 100 years - Five for Fighting

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Post a new comment)

Wally-World
rockerannah AIM: xBrOkzTiDaLwAvEx
2004-06-06 21:56 (link)
Dude, I just went to Wal Mart today too. I agree, I love their cheap prices. I don't see what all these rich kids' deal is with Wal Mart, they think it's bad or something but you can get good name brand stuff there, great makeup music and more for cheaper prices. If I can get a cute purse there for $20 bucks why would I go to Abercrombie or American Eage to buy one that looks almost exactly the same for $50 bucks? I love Wal Mart, it's great for the American society.
(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Wally-World
smurfy AIM: RainingSkyfire
2004-06-11 14:12 (link)
Oh, smurfy aint no rich kid, I defientlly aint no rich kid

BUT WALMART IS GONNA CAUSE THE WORLD TO CRASH INTO A BLACK HOLE.

here's me thesis on the subject.

A( Wal-mart charges low prices but stocks 56 quntillion brands of itmes into 3 feet of space

B( Black holes are quintillions of miles away

C( WALMART IS EVIL

D( Some guy invents a new form of fuel in the year 2034 that allows us to burn walmart items and generate power

E( Evil scientist most liekly named Dr Freakenstein uses this power to move earth towards a black hole

F( A musical note, F.

M( Something happened between e and m

X( Earth moves towards black hole at great rate

Y( Bill clinton and OJ finally plead gulity to having a "Sexy relationship" with each other

Z( Earth goes into a black hole and walmart is to balme as we rot in dimension F

See? Walmart is going to kill us all.

AND I KNEW IT.
GIVE ME MONEY VIA PAYPAL NOW.

Hot diggity...This movie so rocked...8 years ago..

Smurfy — 2004-06-11T07:06:00-05:00

Power Rangers Movie!

What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

because I feel like adding more of my angsty poems:

Smurfy — 2004-06-12T01:06:00-05:00

I couldn't sing enough to prove to my heart,
That the only thing worth seeing
is your beautiful face
You're beautiful face...
So my heart will sing the song for me
The song I have never uttered.
The song that exists only because of you,
My beautiful one.

Feel free to critcize my angsty poems, for they are angsty and deserve criticism

So, Walmart is evil, right?

Smurfy — 2004-06-12T12:06:00-05:00

Almost right. Wal-mart's rulers are pure evil, but wal-mart itself is a good thing.

IN LIMITATION

These things grow faster than a basket full of rabbits.
And those things multiply pretty fast man.

But let me tell you, this walmart stuff,

It's a bad deal.
It all started back in 1831, when a man by the name of WALLIFORD JONES Decided to open a general store south of main street.

Well walliford jones was rich as a dead pine beatle 'cause he owned half oh nevada. The other half belonged to the US. the other 1/8 belonged to Tim, the guy from all my stories. (Tim will return in a few weeks with an actual sense making story) (haha)

So WALLIFORD JONES, he always liked to have his name in caps, just kept adding on to his general store south of main street, until it was south west AND east of town.

IT misplaced 12 CITY LIVERS!
And they all had to watch (A PIC OF THE RIIIIIIINNNGGGGG! OH NO! DONT LOOK!

And they only had 30 people in the town of Barthololog anyway. It was a german town. In the US. probably located somewhere near a mcDonalads now.

Well after they grew so huge, everyone just stsrated living in campers outside WALLLIFORDMART
That's the beggining of the trailer people's obsession with WALLIFORDMART

Because of the campers.

Because,
The camper guys
They needed camping supplies every day to survive
They were the people WALLIFORD JONES relocated 'cause he hated humanity and wanted ti to SUFFFEEERRR

Now Walliford Jones, (He wanted a regular name now) one day, decided to go for a stroll

Some guys came to jump him, but he pulled out a

WALLIFORDMART .10000000 REVOLVER

And shot the poor people in the head.
Oh this did not kill the man
It was a WALLIFORDMART gun
It was torture, it might their faces become deformed, but it caused NO HARM!

Walliford Jones saw how he was the only one who would hire these guys, being how ...ugh..they were ugly man.

So this was WALLIFORDMARTS beggining to "Help people"

AFTER THEY SCREWED THEM UP TO BEGIN WITH

Fast forward 100 or so years
it's 1998

WALLY JONES is now in control of the "EVIL EMPIRE OF WALMART"

And he did grow

He grew till he couldn't see a street in america without WALMART on it

Then, in 2031, when there were walmarts withing every 5 miles,

They unleashed it.

THEY UNLEASED THE

FACEMUTILATORRAY.100000000

WALMART DESTROYED OUR FACES

Because of this, we were froced to work in WALMART
Under WALLIFORD JONES XIII.

Now after the next generation had come and gone, there were normal faced people again, and they planned a revlution for humnity against the evil that is wallifordmart.

THEY DECIDED TO MAKE STUFF INSTEAD OF BUY IT!

(Hear gasps from readers all over the world)

So to do this, they moved to the one place wal-mart never went.

AUSTRALIA...

Seriously how come these guys never do anything at all.
It's insane.

Anywho, after we relocated to australia, we could sense danger rising.

The humans left watched in horror as the WALMART ZOMBIE FACE ARMY conquered every single countr except australia.

A few faceless ones found there way to austraia, but not much could be done to save any others.
We had to save our stregnth to fight walliford the XIII (HE liked small letters now)

So he began the invasion.
"CHARGE"
Walliford issued the command
"DEBIT YOU BLOODY FOOL, DEBIT" Cried one of WAllIfOrD's (he liked this now) enemies.

Thenm out of the blue, in amidst the battle,

An evil being called THEATKINSLOWCARBDIET appeared!
HE SLAUGHTERED THEM ALL WITH CONTINUAL AD'S FOR THEIR ENTIRE LIVES, HE SLUGHTERED THEM WITH POINTLESS STATISTICS, HE SLGUHTERED THEM WIH PHOTOSHOPPED IMAGES AND HIRED ACTORS!

He slaughtered them all in the name of LOW CARBS.

The moral of the story is: I FRIGGIN HATE LOW CARB DIETERS

The beggining is only ending.

Smurfy — 2004-06-13T04:06:00-05:00

As this is my last update until possibly July 5th or so,

I wish you all a merry month of June.

Leave me lots of pointless comments here, so I can keep up with say..blondy and skittles and that other guy and myname here and all the people I actually know in person.

Stay safe, and sue wal-mart friends.

Until later,

Your spaztic friend,
Smurfy.

A cliffhangar to keep you dorks happy

Smurfy — 2004-06-13T11:06:00-05:00

"Hat time!" The stupid child announced loudly
The child placed a large braves cap on it's tiny easy to pucnh face.

"FACE TIME" Announced the retarded grown man.
He did hit the kid right in the face too.

"Ow! My nose! Ow! my eyebrows are swelling! EYEBROW TIME! hahaha" The kid said.
"Since your such a mean old man I'm going to run away from home"

The young stupid child witht he bald head ran towards the frozen lake in the middle of summer.

"How is that lake frozen in the summer OH MY! THERE IS A LIZARD!" Announced the retarded middle aged man loudly.

"OH NO!" Yelled the child"
"I HAVE FALLEN INTO THE FROZEN LAKE IN THE SUMMER AND I AM DROWNING! ITS WATER TIME!"

"LOOK AT THIS LIZARD AND IT'S EYES OH MY! THERE IS A CRY OF ~~HELP~~ THE BUZZARD!

SUDDENLY

"Who's there?! 'OMG'! I CANNOT BELIEVE IT! IT'S TIME FOR ME TO-----------"

To be continued.

IN THREE WEEKS SUCKERS.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

HA!

See if you can finish the story for smurfy.
FINISH THE STORY IN TH MESSAGE BOARD THINGY! THE CHOMPIN ZOMBY!

The winner recieves 5 smurfodollars!!!!

So far the smurfodolalrs rankings are:

Stephanie- 1 smurfodollar
everyone else- no smurfodollars.

Can you hand the power of getting FIVE SmurfoDollars™?

Play the

WIN FIVE SmurFoDollars STORY SWEEPSTAKES! AND FIND OUT!

See you in three week's, foolios.

I best have some story enders too.

-Your best blogging friend in the whole of MindSay,
Smurfy.

3 weeks..oh..man..I'm gonna miss ranting...

Breathe

Smurfy — 2004-07-05T06:07:00-05:00

I'm Back.

And so , The merriment begins

Smurfy — 2004-07-07T02:07:00-05:00

I will soon have updates on the Magical Smurfy Vacation period. AFTER I CHUG THIS FLAT AND HORRIBLE TASTING SODA!

Okay.

Now, I don't feel like talking about my 3.5 week vacation right now, so you're all just going to have to grin and bear the excitement of my...uh..whatever...

Anyway.

It's summer so naturally I have nothing to talk about, but who cares, when do I EVER have anything to talk about.

I did complete these film projects:

Mr. Derby In: Commercial CRRRRRAZINESS
PuPuEEZ: Dietary Suplement
ROCKETMAN: The Ultimate Edition (With a sick soundtrack, ladies)

Not only that, But I made a SUPER TAPE,

45 FREAKIN' Minutes of Smurfy MADNESS.
And it's YOURS for only 79.99 plus tax! plus shipping! Plus insurance! Plus medicare benefits!

needless to say I often thought; MAN I SHOULD BLLLLLOG THIS. OH WAIT I AM ON VACATION CURRRRRSES.

I alays think in caps, my friends. Because on the inside, I really am a n00b at heart.

Stupid n00bs.

But man.

I filmed the opening credits sequence of rocketman, and it was so good and seamless that I freakin cried.

Good heavens is it magical or what.

ALso def leopard roxorz.

Anywho.

This is my blog, in which I am well pleased.

Please, go be a chompin' zombie, and reply to your hearts content.

ADIOS FELLOW CITIZENS OF MINDSAY AND HOTT UPPERCLASS CHICKS

(more on that later, tee hee)

Also,

Smurfy — 2004-07-07T03:07:00-05:00

raggamuffin wins the 5 smurfodollars. the rest of you suck at randomness. Jeez.

Dude, I hate spam.

Smurfy — 2004-07-07T03:07:00-05:00

Your Homicidal Rampage! by crash_and_burn

Your name:

Weapon of Choice:

A broomstick

Your Favorite Target:

Pornstars

Your Kill Count:

224,979,226

Your Battle Cry:

"Enlarge your penis with this ALL-NATURAL PILL!"

Years You Spend in Jail:

How Much Money In Damages You Cause:

$209,258,627,001,075

Your Homocidal Insanity Level:: 43%

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

??

Smurfy — 2004-07-07T03:07:00-05:00

My Update old entries button hasnt worked for a long time.

anyway.

You are Spearmint.
You are quick-witted and sharp. You pay close
attention to details and you can tell what your
friends are feeling. You are always the first
to understand a joke and you are valued for
your insight and advice. However, you
sometimes isolate yourself from other people,
afraid to share your own feelings.
Most Compatible With: Cinnamon

Which Tic-Tac Flavor Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

CURSES! CAPS AGAIN!

Smurfy — 2004-07-08T01:07:00-05:00

Aye.

It's time for a good ol' fashioned rant, rave, and full out offensive manuver, people of mindsay.

And Bill Clinton.

Anywho.

It's some to my attention that for some reason I'm hangin' out with a bunch of whiny yankee democrats who happen to be liberals which is the same thing.
XD
BURN MY DEMOCRATIC FREINDS, BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURN

Man.

Okay, thats out of the way now.
If you guys get fat I'm killing all of you.

But I'm here today to address something for more random than politics.

E-mail.

Remember along time ago, if you are an old net-savvy senior like me, around the time of 1998.

There was hardly any such thing as "Spam"
Remember, how you would get 6 or 7 emails a day from people?
Yeah.

That doesn't happen anymore
Take this letter, from some idiot named MAYNARD...hahahahahahahahahaha

maynard...
gah.
anyway

..."Here is the trend: Lately, when emailing my groups for my political party, church, and service club, I have noticed slower, and much much fewer responses. Why is this? People tell me they are tired of opening their email, whether it be AOL, outlook, yahoo, whatever they use, and findind spam, viruses, and worms. Not to mention alarming messages like security breaches firewalls..etc..

How long would you keep your newspaper subscription if every morning it was wrapped in 2 or 3 pounds of garbage and ad's? I guess it will be back to telephone before long..."
Maynard (HAHAHAHAHAHA) Gross, Homer, Alaska.

hmm..So, like some chat rooms on the ol' AOHELL format, will email become some underground fringe of society thing?

Will it just simply fade into the past, with newer mediums coming into play?

Will people some day consider email the forerunner of modern communication, like landlines and cell phones today?

Also, when was the last time you just sat down and wrote am email? just randomly sat there and typed someone an email.

For me, it's been a long long long time.
I used to have email penpals from alll over the world, but now, it seems simpler to IM everyone.

Why email?

Time shall reveal it's secrets, I suppose.

Later rant-readers.

-Smurfy

"They set us up the bomb!!!!!"

Smurfy — 2004-07-09T10:07:00-05:00

All your base are belong to us

AYE.

Watch out for KATS. Not Kat. KATS. He onyl has half a face.

Anywho.

I'm displaying RocketMan: THE ULTIMATE EDITION at jasons today, along with Mr. Derby 2.

God bless that Mr. Derby, I tell you what.

Man, I have nothing to say.

I'm leaving tommorow morning at seven for DOLLLLYWOOOD HYUK HYUK.

So I'll be gone all weekend. Don't worry, it's just 72 hours of non-smurfical sadness....::cough::

yeah.

So anyway, I'll eb riding that dolly parton coaster with the two really big hills (TEE HEE HEE) for awhile. I'll come back an dupdate about all these crazy vacation antics.

Inculding the case of the missing bacon. Seriously.
ITS CALLED THAT.

I IMed Blondy, that chick who said she was leaving, etc. and she was all.

"Lol yeah"

Then she sort of went away or blocked me or something. But ah..LOL YEAH MAN.

Lawl. That's how you say that.
So after my public service announcement of email yesterday, I realized that made way to much sense, and am offering..uh...Blast it, I forgot what I was gonna write...well...

But check out that hit counter man. 540 hits! How insane is that.

(I'm just jabbering today, nothing ACTUALLY is going to get written.

So you could stop now.

Or...noooooow.

I might have some pictures to psot before long, but, I suppose, until then....

Have a way wiggy/groovy weekend, don't eat to many lucky charms, take out the trash, and walk you're dogs/or ferrets.

Those crazy ferrets.

Also I'm wondering why I've gone to 5 blogs and found mention of ICP 5 times.

Insane Clown Posse is a tool of retardation man.

AND JUGGALOE IS THE MOST ANNOYING WORD EVER .

Also their fans are more retarded than AIMGIRLS

Check out http://www.somethingawful.com for more.

LATER SUCKA'S.

Blue! you are artistic, and very creative, but
sometimes too mellow for your friends! cheer up
and go WILD!

What color crayon are you??
brought to you by Quizilla

"The horrors of Wal-Mart Vol. I" A new novel by Smurfy J. Foxx

Smurfy — 2004-07-12T08:07:00-05:00

The horrors of Wal-Mart Volume I

Take a look around. You are no longer within the strands of normality.

You are now in Wal-Mart.
That's right, fools, Wal-Mart.

Not for the faint of heart, this "Super-Store", or as some call it, "Stupid-Store", is the center of power for all people to retarded to go find somewhere else to quote unquote "CHILL".

During my recent encoutners with wal-mart I have logged these certain types of people:

Home-Boy: A person who has gotten parole to visit wal-mart. Likes to terrorize the bicycle and car sections. Watch out for their liberty spikes! Woah! That was close!

Angry Mexican: Angry mexican's who stare at pricetags, then you, then at pricetags again. Watch out amigo!

Bored black girls: They just sort of group into masses and walk paths around the stores. Mostly safe, but watch out for their ponytails!

102 Jamz drones: The most annoying, obnoxious and retarded of all Wal-Mart clans, save the rednecks (TEE HEE). They frequent only ONE isle. THE RADIO ISLE .
They will not attempt any communications whatsoever with anyone whatsoever, save their "god" which is the DJ on 102 JAM"Z". These guys just make smurfy angry.

Rednecks!: The most entertaining of all! Watch as they persue their ambitions of buying 13-packs of beer! That's right! Thirteen! the 12 pack and the one they hide in their mullets on the way out! Haha, smurfy you dog. WATCH OUT FOR THEM THERE CHEVYS! THEY WILL GIT YOOO!

Out-Of-Place-White-Guys: Me. They sort of look around and walk to many places seeking isolation from the masses of 102 JAMZ Drones. Gah. Poor OOPWG's.

Trailer-Chicks: Girls from seemingly RedNECK family's. Often wear little to nothing and like to shop the candy aisles looking for mullet children.

Mullet Children: Kids from RedNeck families. They are startlingly scary. Oftnen their mullets will exceed the patriarch's, or even the She-Mullets. FEAR THE SHE MULLETS.

TO BE CONTINUUUUUUUED

Also I will be under a lawsuit if this is not placed:
Erin turned Fifteen. GASP. There. NOW STOP SPAMMING MY EMAIL ACCOUNT SUCKER.

Also.

Smurfy — 2004-07-12T08:07:00-05:00

Tonight at 9, VH1, I FREAKIN LOVE THE 90's!

Hahaha! this is awesome!

I REMEMBER the 90s!! So this show will make SENSE.

Stupid 80's.

Dollywood; not for those with bad backs

Smurfy — 2004-07-13T11:07:00-05:00

Man you gotta see my pictures of the roller coasters, upon which my ace made a funny looking scream. Never seen so many blood veins in one picture before.

Gotta which them thar wood coasters ya'll.

Also I love the 90's roxorz.

So, I arrive at my hotel, in pigeon forge. best westeren or something.

We have a party of 5 today, as my Grandma went with us.
They have beds for four, suckers.

Guess who got to sleep on the...or..well..should I say, GUESS WHO GOT TO LAY ON THE FLOOR AND PRETEND TO SLEEP!

That's right man,

SMURFFFFFFY

Aw, poor smurf.

Other than the usual family complaints we all seem to experience, I don't have much to say as not much happened.

Hmmm...

I did discover IHOP is pretty groovy.

Any resturant that hops is way wigged out n' stuff.

Still no party at Lee's.

I HAVE GOT TO GO TO A PARTY SOON OR I AM GOING TO DIE/SCREAM

gah.

I havent flirted with anyone in like a month.

It's getting old man.

So is this blog entry, let me tell you.

Coming soon: THE HORRORS OF WALMART VOL. II!

This time, it's on pay per VIEW.

Your element is Fire: Strong, hot tempered,
powerful, and passionate. Well now lets see,
being fire you are quite strong and powerful,
people look up to you greatly and often seek
your protection. You have the ability to gain
many friends and you are always one people can
count on to do what you say you will do. You
are extremely loyal be it friends or family
you'll stick up for them and you are never
willing to put them in a position that could
hurt them. You know what roll you play in life,
leader, and you intend to let people know it.
Not everyone is capable of leadership but you
certainly have the willpower and flare to do
it. You have quite a temper if it shows itself,
one that can often lead you into trouble. Once
your mind is made up there is no changing it
but no one said that was a bad thing.

.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla
I did that one before, but TOO BAD.

Time for my first boring generic survey

Smurfy — 2004-07-13T12:07:00-05:00

ABOUT YOU
Your full name::	Smurfy J. Foxx
Age::	16
Height::	5'5"
Natural hair colour::	Brown/blonde/black/red combo.
Eye colour::	Dark dark blue
Number of siblings::	1
Glasses/contacts?::	Both! HAHAHAHA.
Piercings::	None at all
Tattoos::	None
Braces?::	Nope!
FAVOURITE
Colour::	Blue
Band::	Smash Mouth
Song::	Float On!!!
Stuffed animal::	They bez all in the basement with all the other things from my long past childhood
Video game::	Right now...out of my old ones, Time splitters 2
TV show::	Late Night with Conan O'Brien, or the No-Spin Zone on fox news.
Movie::	Office Space
Book::	Hmmmm....The Wanderer.
Food::	Spaghetii
Game on a cell phone::	My cell phone games suck.
CD cover::	I burn everything. >D
Flower::	Im allergic. ::nose runs::
Scent::	...No idea..
Animal::	Phoenix
Comic book::	Sonic The Hedgehog
Cereal::	Lucky Charms!
Website::	http://www.expage.com/smurfpedia
Cartoon::	eh..Not cartoon...ANIME..fool...Trigun.
DO YOU
Play an instrument?::	No sir.
Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?::	NOOOO way
Like to sing?::	Yes
Have a job?::	Going to
Have a cell phone?::	Yesh
Like to play sports?::	GAG
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?::	hahahahahahahahaha...HA...no.
Have a crush on someone?::	Plenty
Live somewhere NOT in the united states?::	Confusing question aint it
Have more than 5 TVs in your house?::	Yes
Have any special talents/skills?::	Hmmm...I can act like theres no tomorow, and I can edit movies to death
Excercise daily?::	Yes
Like school?::	YES
CAN YOU
Sing the alphabet backwards?::	No
Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes?::	O.o some people can't?
Speak any other languages?::	No
Go a day without food?::	Im dead not eating since last night fool.
Stay up for more than 24 hours?::	Yes
Read music, not just tabs?::	Not at allll
Roll your tongue?::	Yesh
Eat a whole pizza?::	Very much so, and have plenty of times
HAVE YOU EVER
Snuck out of the house?::	No
Cried to get out of trouble?::	No sir/ma'am!
Gotten lost in your city?::	My city is like..un..get lostable
Seen a shooting star?::	Yes!
Been to any other countries besides the united states?::	Yes!
Had a serious surgery?::	Yes sir!
Stolen something important to someone else?::	mmhm
Solved a rubiks cube?::	hahahaha, no, stfu.
Gone out in public in your pajamas?::	Yesh
Cried over a girl?::	Not a'tall
Cried over a boy?::	>D No sir.
Kissed a random stranger?::	Nope
Hugged a random stranger?::	Nopppe
Been in a fist fight?::	Yes, ohhh yes.
Been arrested?::	Not in this life
Done drugs?::	Shertinly nawt.
Had alcohol?::	nope
Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?::	Laughed and had dr. pepper come out my nose.
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?::	mmhm
Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?::	No
Swore at your parents?::	Not out loud..anyway..>_>...
Been to warped tour?::	Nope
Kicked a guy where it hurts?::	Nu-uh
Been in love?::	Not at all
Been close to love?::	Wished
Been to a casino?::	No
Ran over an animal and killed it?::	almsot hit a groundhog yesterday
Broken a bone?::	no
Gotten stitches?::	No
Had a waterballoon fight in winter?::	O.o..NO
Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?::	noooo
Made homemade muffins?::	u.u... stupid questions
Bitten someone?::	w....t....f.
Been to disneyland/disneyworld?::	Yes
More than 5 times?::	No, twice.
Been to niagra falls?::	I'm going next year
Burped in someones face?::	Duh
Gotten the chicken pox?::	Yes, thankfully,
WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU
Brushed your teeth::	yesterday morning
Went to the bathroom::	o.o dude.
Saw a movie in theaters::	3 weeks ago
Read a book::	last week
Had a snow day::	a while back, like, february
Had a party::	my parties nottoriously suck.
Had a slumber party::	o.o no.
Made fun of someone::	>D I'm way evil, I make fun of everyone. so like, yesterday
Tripped in front of someone::	at school, sometime back
Went to the grocery store::	yesterday
Got sick::	wow...uh...november?
Cursed::	like...7 or 8 days ago.
PICK ONE
Fruit/vegetables::	Grapes
Black/white::	>D Racist. RACIST! YAY! Black, like byron.
Lights on/lights off::	lights DIMMED. HAHAHAHAHA.
TV/movie::	Movie.
Car/truck::	Car
Body spray/lotion::	Neither. Eugh. For you yankee's, not a southerner!! HAHAHAHA.,...how retarded,,,
Cash/check::	Moneh
Pillows/blankets::	....u.u
Headache/stomach ache::	I'm so not into s & m.
Paint/charcoal::	Paint?
Chinese food/mexican food::	Ch-ch-ch-ch-chinese
Summer/winter::	Summah
Snow/rain::	Raaaain
Fog/misty::	O.o..lame questions man. mist.
Rock/rap::	ROCK.
Meat/vegetarian::	Vegetarians are stupid. GIMME MEAT.
Boy/girl::	now this is perplexing. Is it asking what we are..or..hmmm...GIRL.
Chocolate/vanilla::	Chocolate
Sprinkles/icing::	Icin'
Cake/pie::	Pie.
French toast/french fries::	Toasssst
Strawberries/blueberries::	StEEERAWBERRIES
Ocean/swimming pool::	Pool
Hugs/kisses::	o.o...depends on the person
Cookies/muffins::	Cookeh.
p33n/bewbz::	*&@^&@ 1337'5!!!!!!!!!
Wallet/pocket::	As mr. derby says, POCKEEET
Window/door::	O.O door. @_@.
Emo/goth::	I despise them both but seemingly don't. I'm complex.
Pink/purple::	die.
Cat/dog::	Dawg man, dawgs. I got a cat named ferret and..a...you've all heard it...
Long sleeve/short sleeve::	short sleeves.
Pants/shorts::	Pants.
Winter break/spring break::	Spring.
Spring/autumn::	Autumnnnmnmnmn
Clouds/clear sky::	Clouds! Woosh!
Moon/mars::	u.u<^> moon.
FRIENDSHIP
How many friends do you have?::	A freakin ton of em.
What are their names?::	Hahahaha..seriously?
Do you have a best friend?::	I find that to be elementary level there.
Have you ever liked one of your friends?::	Yeah
Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?::	probably equal with a bit more chicks.
Have you ever lost a friend?::	Yeah
Have you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend?::	mmhm
Whats an inside joke between you and a friend?::	hmm...THIS IS THE SAFEST PLACE...
Have you ever gotten in a big arguement with a friend?::	Yeah, check out melanies blog dude.
Whats the nicest thing youve ever done for a friend?::	I send e-cards. Thats it.
Whats the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?::	Hmmm...wait a minute...
Do you miss any of your old friends?::	Some of them. Others can stay away.
What friend have you known the longest?::	a guy no one here would probably know.
Do you regret anything youve done to a friend?::	I don't regret anything in my life.
If so, what is it?::	oi.
How often do you spend time with your friends?::	as much as I can.
Do any of your friends drive?::	not like I do. >D
Has a friend of yours ever died?::	yes
Whats the dumbest thing youve done with a friend?::	hmmmm....pushed one off a cliff at my house. seriously.
What do you think your friends think of you?::	Oh, that smurfy. I just want to kick his ^%&@& THEN I WILL #$^&@*&!!!!!!!!
LOVE AND ALL THAT CRAP
Have you ever been in love?::	No
If you have, with who?::	No
Are you single?::	yessssss...;-;
Are you in a relationship?::	..
If so, for how long?::	no
Do you believe there is someone for everyone?::	Yesh
What is your idea of the best date?::	bowling and a movie and some food man. THREE
What was your first kiss like?::	Nonexistent
How old were you when you got your first kiss?::	;-;
Do you think love is a load of shit?::	No
Whats the best experiance youve ever had with the opposite sex?::	Hmmmmm...Something in the play probably..
If you are single, have you had any boyfriends/girlfriends before?::	Nope
Have you ever been dumped?::	No
Have you ever dumped someone?::	nooo
Whats the most sexual thing youve done with the opposite sex?::	>D
WORD ASSOCIATION
Slippers::	rabbit
Hat::	mr derby
Hard::	O.o
Free::	O.J. Simpson
Space::	monkey
Taste::	spagethii...typo..
Good charlotte::	emo scum.
Red::	blue
Deep::	clear
Heart::	bodily organ
Cord::	vocal
Cheese::	cat
Rain::	dark
Work::	fun
Pedal::	pain
Head::	ache
Bed::	sleep
Fluff::	cat
Hardcore::	Metal
Race::	hyuk, nascar
Knife::	O.J. Simpson
Jump::	moped
I....
am::	Smurfy, the groovy one.
want::	food
need::	People
crave::	pasta.
love::	frequently
hate::	alot of things
did::	not do it
feel::	hungry
miss::	a few people
am annoyed by::	a few people I dont miss
would rather::	eat uncooked pasta
am tired of::	emo and foolish political banter
will always::	remember
SILLY STUFF
What is your favourite genre of music?::	Varies
What time is it now?::	12:11 pm
What day is it?::	Tuesdee
Whens the last time you called someone?::	I need to call Lucy, thanks for reminding me.
How much money do you have right now?::	13.45 cents
Are you hungry?::	O.o YES!
Whatcha doin?::	lame survey
Do you like parades?::	No
Do you like the moon?::	Yes
What are you going to do when youre done with this?::	eat
Isnt cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?::	u.u no.
If you could have any magical power what would it be?::	Invisibility....>D
Have you ever had a picnic?::	Mmhm
Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?::	Yesh
What about sock em boppers?::	no, deprived of joy.
Are you wearing any socks right now?::	no.
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE
funny?::	Yes, moderetlly
pretty?::	No
sarcastic?::	heavily
lazy?::	No
hyper?::	Not all the time
friendly?::	yesh
evil?::	~.o sometimes.
smart?::	very
strong?::	Not at ALL
talented?::	at some things
dorky?::	yeahhhh
ASSOCIATE THESE WORDS WITH SOMEONE YOU KNOW (or dont know)
high::	Robert Rhodes
skip::	stupid people
dance::	Julie from school
lonely::	hmm...
pen::	Pen...PEN? Wha? Mr. Derby..?..and Mr derby..Jason.
flower::	Lucy
window::	no idea
psycho::	alot of people I know, Mostly Lee Hill
brain freeze::	Me
orange::	o.o
sassy::	emily..
jelly::	Michelle Cohen
FOR OR AGAINST
suicide::	against
love::	for
drunk drivers::	against
airplanes::	for
war::	for
canada::	it's canada man.
united states::	This is my country, I support any decision it makes regardless of my own.
rock music::	for
gay marriage::	Against, against, against.
school::	FOR
surveys::	after this, against
parents::	ah..SKIP
cars::	for
killing::	..aye..against..hm...
britney spears::	WHo watches her music videos for the music. o.o
coffee::	ah..no opinion
pants::	for!
WOULD YOU EVER
Sky dive?::	I want to!
Play strip poker?::	and show off this flabby bod? ha.
Run away?::	Nah.
Curse at a teacher?::	I'm scared of d-1's.
Not take a shower for a week?::	Yeah, heck, I've done that.
Ask someone out?::	I dunno. from the looks of me today it would be no, but, heck, who knows.
Lie to someone to make them think better of you?::	Yeah
Visit a foreign country for more than a month?::	if it's Japan..yeah
Go scuba diving?::	yes
Write a book?::	I have done so.
Become a rockstar?::	Nah
Have casual sex?::	Doubt it.
LAST QUESTIONS
What shampoo do you use?::	hahahaha, NONE HYUK HYUK HYUK
Whens the last time you did something sexual with the opposite sex?::	o.o Getting deep?
What kind of computer do you have?::	Im a nerd, don't make me start
What grade are you in?::	10th
Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?::	no
Or just make out?::	Possibly
How many posters do you have in your room?::	I had a freakin ton of them before I repainted.
How many cds do you have?::	20 or 30
What time is it now?::	12:21, and time to END it. GAH. DIE DIE DIE.

extremely long survey brought to you by BZOINK!

Tropical SKIES? YOU MEAN LIKE CAR ENGINES?

Smurfy — 2004-07-13T11:07:00-05:00

This entry is guranteed to make no sense. I MEAN FREAKIN NONE.

I know I have a thing against those stupid surveys, but I did one anyway.

So sue me, I'm at almost 600 hits and I could care less.

LONG LIVE MY BLOG WHICH IS KIND OF FUNNY BUT MAKES MODERATE SENSE ALTHOUGH I HAVE OFFENDED YOU™

That's my slogan!

WOW SMURFY! FUUUN!

So this chick, Tropical Skies IM's me, says:

SMURFY U ROXOR

Or, more like,

I read your blog a few times, and it's quite funny.

Rock on TropicalSkies, Rock on. THOU ALSO DOTH ROXOR!

Roxor being rock except groovy

Now lets talk about the rainforest shall we?
NAHHH

I'm more intrested in Oh MAN I totally forgot everything I was gonna say.

So get this, at my math tutoring conference over the evils that soon will be geometry, I learned that geometry actually indeed does SUCK. BUT IT'S HIDING IN THAT TRIANGLE BY YOUR SHOULDER!

GASP!

It's a QUADROPEDIC MULTI-LINGUAL TRIANGLE CUBE!

TURN IT TO FOX QUICK AND WATHC FOR LOVE OR MONEY 62!!! HURRRRRYYY!

I honestly don't have ANYTHING to say here, I'm just screwing around. Big time. Even for me.

And that says alot, folks.

But I have to get to bed so I can pick GREEN BEANS TOMMOROW!!! HHHEEEEEYUK!

Also, while surfing gamefaqs, I noticed a startling trend among people aged 12-34.

They are really freakin' stupid.

Man,

If your so lazy you can't type the three characters to spell "You", you REALLY need to quit posting on forums dedicated to Super Mario dating Lara Croft, okay?

Idiots.

Man, Lara is hott though, let me tell you.

I told you there was no substance here today folks.

Oh wait!

CONVO TIME SUCKERS

Raining SkyFire: !
eventachic: !!!
Raining SkyFire: Man
eventachic: ?
Raining SkyFire: Didn't you watch I love the 90's?!
Raining SkyFire: O.O!
eventachic: nope
eventachic: everyone else in the world did
Raining SkyFire: !!!!!!!!!!
Raining SkyFire: THEY HAD POWER RANGERS TONIGHT!
eventachic: me and liza compliled a I HATE THE 90s LIST
Raining SkyFire: o.o
Raining SkyFire: Why is you gotta be so coooold
eventachic: kileigh becky and arianna were all born in the 90s
Raining SkyFire: CRAP YOUR RIGHT
Raining SkyFire: Blast!
Raining SkyFire: FOILED
Raining SkyFire: CURSE YOUR LOGIC JACLYN PENELOPE BROWNING!
eventachic: hahahahahahaha
eventachic: i got you
Raining SkyFire: So you did
Raining SkyFire: FINE
Raining SkyFire: You cant touch power rangers though
eventachic: yeah they were cool
eventachic: i wanted to be the pink one
eventachic: she was sexy
Raining SkyFire: Amy Jo Johnson.
Raining SkyFire: hahaha
eventachic: you know her name?
eventachic: wow
Raining SkyFire: Dude.
Raining SkyFire: O.o
Raining SkyFire: She's hott.
eventachic: lmao
eventachic: told you
Raining SkyFire: I liked the hott asian chick better though
Raining SkyFire: ahhh
Raining SkyFire: bah
Raining SkyFire: anyway
eventachic: lmao
eventachic: what is it with guys and asians and lesbians
Raining SkyFire: Dude
Raining SkyFire: Asian chicks are way hott.
eventachic: lmao
eventachic: was the red one a girl or a boy?
Raining SkyFire: It's to late for me to make sense, sorry.
Raining SkyFire: O.o
Raining SkyFire: Theres NEVER been a red power ranger chick
Raining SkyFire: not even in the NEW series
eventachic: so its a guy
Raining SkyFire: it's always a guy
Raining SkyFire: in all
Raining SkyFire: 16 shows.
eventachic: haha
eventachic: ok thank you
Raining SkyFire: this is so going on my blog.
eventachic: what the power ranger convo??
Raining SkyFire: oh yyyeah
eventachic: lmao
eventachic: tell me when its up i wanna read it

Hahahahaha,.......U_U<^>

It's up!!!!!!!

EXCLAMATION POINT DOT DOT DOT!...

Man I am on the biggest sugar rush of the NIGHT ladies and gentlemen.

You know something that's been bothering me re..oh screw it I'll do that tommorow.

I love the 90's is still all far out man.

Next up for my agenda,
MR DERBY: THE POLITICAL CAMPAIGN

Be prepared suckers. This one is going to leave a mark.

Not unlike a blow from those weird dinosaurs in Jurassic park.

Also rosie O'Donnel is retarded.

TIME TO GO WATCH JAY LENO!

Man, Conan is so much better.

Also :____________________________(

Later fools. (LATER AS IN AFTER I PICK GREEN BEANS! TEE HEE!)

LONG LIVE MY BLOG WHICH IS KIND OF FUNNY BUT MAKES MODERATE SENSE ALTHOUGH I HAVE OFFENDED ~~DONALD TRUMP'S HAIR~~ YOU™

Smurfy? Getting a job? NO!

Smurfy — 2004-07-14T02:07:00-05:00

Hmm...let's see

7.50 an hour.

18 hours a week?

SOUNDS GROOVY TO ME!

Smurfy's gonna be the library book shelf guy. YESZ.

No Offense, yo.

Smurfy — 2004-07-14T02:07:00-05:00

My earlier misleading articles might have reflected bad on TropicalSkies.

Smurfy digs the TropicalSkies, so, my previous words are NULL. HAHAHAHA.

o.o

Anywho.

After that sad disaster of words I put together last night, I just decided to fix some issues with myself.

I love the 90's roxorz, according to some hard to read earlier opinions, it seems I didn't like it.

WOOPZ.

I ate at this killer chinese buffet place today man. Waaay hip 'n such.

I am so going to work at the library. And when they ask:
"SIR AND OR MA'AM, ART THEE FAMILIAR WITH DEWEY DECIMAL SYSTEM?"

I shall pronbably respond:

"HAHAHAHAHAHA WUT? HOO'S DEWEY?!!!!"

To which Donald trump will reply:

YOURFIEUHED.

To which I shall say:

"OMG U GUYZ SUXUR."

And then lave for more chinese food.

But I will accidentily walk into walmart, and will imeedietlly hear the HOMEBOYZ and 102 jamz drones turning up the stereos in the walmart electronics aisle, and wondering what the word "Fly" means.

Those crazy homeboyZ and 102 jamz drones.

How I hate their idiotic selves.

Tommorow on my blog:

SMURFY VS. RAP ARTISTS. WHA?!
It's gonna get spicy in here tommorow folks, just you wait.

I'll answer important questions like,

How come in "GANGSTA RAP" they frequently choose to use the word "Nigga"?

I don't get it man.
Like, 150 years of yelling over THE N WOOOOOOORD O.O!!!,
and now it's like.

Hey, let's not do that anymore.

UNLESS YOUR MEXICAN OR WHITE SUCKERS.

It confuses my easily confused and simple yet offensive mind.

Smurfy Note:
The above does not reflect the actual views of the author, nor does he condone or approve any language which hereby was not written with expressed consent of the author himself. He therefore holds no liabil GOOD HEAVENS WHAT JUST HAPPENED TO MY EYE!

MY EYE!

o.o

Smurfy — 2004-07-14T04:07:00-05:00

Quizilla freakin SUCKS.

So I tried to make a smurfy quiz?!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

No.

45 minutes of misplaced server icons, and a whole lot of freakin NO PAGE AVAILABLE pages.

Stupid Quizilla.

YOU STOLE FROM TOHO AND YOU KNOW IT.

Smurfeh pix!

Smurfy — 2004-07-14T04:07:00-05:00

^Smurfy as Dr. FreakenStein

^Smurfy as Mr. Derby (Number one)

^Smurfy as was kewl smurfy

^Smurfy as weird angst smurfy

^Smurfy as Dr. Freak after lab exploded, making him EVIL.

Chat

Smurfy — 2004-07-14T11:07:00-05:00

Touchê.

Seems we have a knife in our midst.

I will weed you out.

I too can be dis-tasteful.

Enjoy the ride.

What the smurf?!

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T11:07:00-05:00

What, is this the End-Of-May fiasco all over again?

What the smurf man.
What the smurf.

You guys are all going freakin' crazy.

Don't rain on my parade.

So let's see what's been going on, shall we?

let's start at the beggining. It's now 11:15, and you recieve the following IM from "Brian"

Brian: Smurfy!
Smurfy: (Random jabber like usual)
B: get mel to invite you to the chat
S: Alright dawg

Smurfy: INVITE ME TO THE CHAT
Mel: WHAT?!?!?!
S: Dude, the chat. Invite me.
M: HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?!?!?!?!
S: Invite me and I shall reveal my seeeeeecrets

(Invites)

Smurfy: Done
Brian: hahaha.

(Chat sequence now takes place)

Shortly after 11:40, a fellow by the name of HENDRIX LUVAR or something comes into the chat.

I presume this fellow is around the age of like

4.

But I might be wrong.

This odd fellow beings to flame smurfy!

HEAVENS NO!

HENDRIXLUVAR: d00d smurfy is a gay name u gaywad
Smurfy: Like you? >D HAHAHAHA
H: U #&@(#*@&!@&*@* I'll BEAT YOUR &*#&@* &*@^#&@ #^^!!!!! THEN "i"'ll *$&#*#&* #^@^!@^
etc.

Now, Smurfy is ultimately at fault here because the world is anti-smurf in times like these because you guys are all yankees or ornery or somethin.

So the next lines of chat are

Stephanie: OMG SMURFY U ARE BEING MEAN
Mel: OMG SMURFY LEAVE
SomeGuyWhosSNeludesme: WHO TEH HECK IS SMURFY
Smurfy: OMG WHAT?
Jason: KEVIN?!?!?!

It went like that for about ..like..15 minutes

SMURFY IZ A JERK!
SMURFY SHUSH!
KEVIN?!
HAHAHAHA WHAT >D >D >D >D >D etc.

The world has lost it's freakin' mind man.

Anywho, now that I have ensured that everyone possible is now gonna be like

WTF U SMOKING SMURFY

I'm all clear to begin the usual task of being loud and obnoxious, not unlike my chatting last night.

I have to work on those caps.

I ate two very extremely large pancakes today.
I am full.

It's morning.
hahahaha

When i left the chat though, I did this cool dramatic exit thing.

I was like.

Oh screw this

When the darkness falls on the late hour, the fools will sleep with darkened thoughts, but as morning comes again,
our tommorow's will be the same.
You have yet to see true vengeance.

XD

DRAMA ROXORZ!

You gotta love my poetic angsty nature man.

Even if you totally hate poetic angsty nature.

I'm quite done now.

LET THE FLAMING BEGIN!

w00t!

-Most magical and wonderous smurfy

I made a smurfy poll!

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T11:07:00-05:00

Get to playin' suckers.

How smurfy are YOU by UltraSmurfy

Name?

Favorite color

Dave Thomas or Texas Pete?

Smurfy percentage: 24%

Grooviness level

Day You Will trip on you

June 1, 2012

How much those shoes are worth

$20

Your win percentage in TWISTER! THE HOT SPOT!: 54%

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

My results

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T11:07:00-05:00

Also the grooviness and smurfy rankings are way off on mine, by like, 60.

How smurfy are YOU by UltraSmurfy

Name?

Favorite color

Dave Thomas or Texas Pete?

Smurfy percentage: 63%

Grooviness level

Day You Will trip on you

December 22, 2009

How much those shoes are worth

$14

Your win percentage in TWISTER! THE HOT SPOT!: 31%

Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

So, As the day went on

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T02:07:00-05:00

Smurfy got an IM from yet another of the groovy chick bloggers of the mindsay set

lorenrobinette

Go visit her blog and talk about hwo people shouldn't copy and paste the word schizaphrenic when it's spelled wrong.

(She also tends to not know the proper way to say "My Bad"

Which is "MY 'B'"

Courtesy Jason.

Now, it feels so absolutely wonderful outside.

I'm going to go dance with the acorns.

Where did the pasta go?

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T02:07:00-05:00

Search the DRESSER, shouted Zora. She was looking for the box of pasta.

Previously her Great grand cousin Ralphy Bill Jr. Had given it the blessing of being magical pasta.

Pasta with a passion FOR MURDER.

That's right.

Her great grand cousin RALPHY BILL JR. WAS A PSYCHOTIC TRANSDIMENSIONAL KILLER FROM MARS

Why weren't you WATCHING it! I TOLD YOU ~~THAT BILL COSBY IS MY NEMESIS FROM NOW ON~~ TO WATCH THAT BOX.

Zora was angry with her nephew, Tommy.

Tommy was a very very very very very stupid child.

I don't like tommy and I just made him up.

Tommy replied to Zora, who was his aunt:

BUT GRAMMA LINDSAY! I LOVE PASTA!
O.O!
WHAT?! Shouted zora,
DID YOU EAT THAT PASTA?!
To which Tommy replied
LOL YES.

Zora immedietlly ran from the boy, for she knew, there was no hope.

She closed her eyes as she began to hear the explosions!

THE PASTA HAD EXPLODED TOMMY!

The very very very very very stupid child.

NOOOOO! Cried Zora, NOO!...w..well...
Actually I didn't like Tommy very much.

He was very very very very stupid.

Zora casually walked back in the house with a song on her lips and a smile on her 68 year old sagging face.

But SUDDENLY

ZOMBIE TOMMY WAS RUNNING AMUCK IN HER CLOSET!

That son of an english SALAD MAKER! Cried Zora

Suddenly Tommy's dad, the great english salad maker Ralphy Bill Sr. Felt his ears catch on fire and he too became a zombie.

Meanwhile, in vermont, Bob Newhart cracked a stupid joke from his INN, in the show NEWHART, and everyone immedietlly cancelled him.

And so, after Zora was properly eaten, The evil pasta was proclaimed the new emperor of Rome, after which was massacred by the turkish invasion of 2018, to which someone replied:

What the HECK is smurfy talking about and why do I care.

Like I would know the answer to that. It's not like I ~~Have any idea what I just wrote or WHY~~ I'm superman.

Good website

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T04:07:00-05:00

Warning, Not for liberals who are more biased than I am....>D
(I'm a conservative republican! alright!)

Way wiggy blog

http://www.thepatriette.com/

Man

Smurfy — 2004-07-15T08:07:00-05:00

I tell you what, God bless neutrality.

For once I'm neither the antagonist nor the pro..oh screw it.

So, since I've been confused by the whole thing since the beggining, here's my take on it: (It's in rhyme! TEE HEE!)

Once upon a midnight clear,
Melissa said: "hello chad dear"
I have some things I'd like to say
So listen good and listen close
all will be revealed today!
Down the path of "lying" chose,
The words were down,
the print was in
The battle won?
Or just a smidge of..hmmm...

Verse two brings in the very next day
The day chad said Oh, you'll pay
So chad talked and talked, not without whine
vengeance, said he, will soon be mine

The third of the verses is now in place
With secrets revealed! There's been plenty of space;
To post your mind onto your blog
and give to them a whole new song
However much, they shouldn't terry
It's all publicity for john kerry!
(I am so not falling for it)

verse four takes place this very moment
With all the parties in mad panic
All included, are full in torment
And smurfy laughed and said "it's like a planet"!

So take this song that really sucks
and give smurfy one hundred bucks.

Thankyou.

-Smurfy and his lame-song abilities.
(I still don't know what the heck is going on)

Cool NEW pics

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T12:07:00-05:00

YES.

West side yo.

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T12:07:00-05:00

That's righ' DAWG

1000?

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T12:07:00-05:00

I just realized I'm about to hit 1000 on the ol' hitometer.

o.o

DUDE THAT'S FREAKIN AWESOME.

If you happen to be looking at this blog when 1000 appears on the bottom of the page, leave your ol' name and junk, and you'll win a groovy new prize.

LIKE THE PRICE IS RIGHT!

And man, did you see jeopardy last night.

Ken came close to losing once, but ultimately came back and was like 15,000 ahead.

He now has 32 day total winnings of over 1,000,000 dollars.

That sucker is freakin GOOD.

GO KEN!
JEOPARDY MAN!

And here's a joke for all you suckerasa's at home.
(I LIKE THIS ONE MAN!)

So,
This couple had just gotten into the medical ward, because this man's wife was in labor, aboutto deliver a baby.

The doctor told the man and his wife about this new invention that would mentally transfer some of the labor pain off the Mother and onto the Father.

The man and his wife said they would use it, so they hooked machine up. They set it for 10% of the woman's pain, and told the guy it'd probably be more pain than he'd ever experienced in his life.

But when they activated the machine, the man felt absolutely FINE. He said to the doctor, put it up to 30%!
And they did, but the man could STILL handle it!
The man said to the doctor, take some more of it off my wife, I can handle it! And so the doctor cranked it up to 50% of the labor pain.

The doctor was AMAZED that this man had such a high high high tolerance for pain! The man and his wife talked for a minute, and then the man said, put it all the way to 100%! And they did! Everyone in the room was amazed! The wife felt wonderful! The man felt fine!

So the woman delivered a very healthy baby quite painlessly, and everyone was very astonished about the events as the word spread throughout the hospital.

However, when the couple got home, they found the mailman lying dead on the porch.

Crap

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T02:07:00-05:00

I accidentily tripped the 1000 marker myself.

Way to go smurfy.

Idiot.

I stole this, and I'm not very exciting.

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T02:07:00-05:00

11:20am - Type your name with your........

Fingers: Smurfy

nose: swkj7845r57 (my nose is huge)

elbow: wsjk784r6

chin: samuyrfdryuh

feet: smurtyu

eyes closed using one finger: s,uedt

palm: sjmurfgyu

mouse: smurfy

wrist: sqx oh screw that

knee: x c mn btdgyio

Jeez man.

Awesome John Kerry site

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T04:07:00-05:00

http://www.kerrycore.com/index.htm

>D

Enjoy.

AWESOME TSHIRTS

Smurfy — 2004-07-16T04:07:00-05:00

More political grooviness.

YES.

The time before that thing which already happened

Smurfy — 2004-07-17T02:07:00-05:00

HOWDY!

It's now 2:30, and I'm well on my way for the premiere of ROCKETMAN and Mr Derby 1 & 2.

My first public screening of these cinematic gems I have so ELOQUENTLY crated.

XD

Gems.

Anyway.

If you ever hear of spider walkin' crazy chilluns running down stairs spewing internal organs, you are definetlly watching a horror movie with no plot.

So,

I just ran out of things to say.

CURSES, FOILED AGAIN!

So now I'll resort to my usual random banter that just wins over your hearts every time.

I am now in a heated politcal debate with one, "Megan Carroll":
sUpEr FuNk oOx: this is place where all the junkies go
Raining SkyFire: ese masterful cinematic gems which I have so eloquently created
Raining SkyFire: oh CRAP
sUpEr FuNk oOx: oh CRAP
sUpEr FuNk oOx: carpe diem
Raining SkyFire: >D
Raining SkyFire: You interupted my blog!
sUpEr FuNk oOx: on with those smilies!
sUpEr FuNk oOx: hahaha, i am entirely way too lazy to make those things
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: I am too
Raining SkyFire: I just write random crap and put pics of me up
sUpEr FuNk oOx: MUAHAHA
Raining SkyFire: ITS FUN
Raining SkyFire: and I get around 150 hits a day doing it too
sUpEr FuNk oOx: slap hands
Raining SkyFire: ::slaps hands::
Raining SkyFire: WHEE
Raining SkyFire: YOU ROXOR!
sUpEr FuNk oOx: YOU REPUBLICAN
sUpEr FuNk oOx: !!!!!!!
Raining SkyFire: YES.
sUpEr FuNk oOx: you IDIOT
Raining SkyFire: Did you go to my blog and find that out?
sUpEr FuNk oOx: yes
Raining SkyFire: XD
sUpEr FuNk oOx: i have lost all respect for you
Raining SkyFire: Those are awesome t-shirts babe
Raining SkyFire: At least the boycott france bumper sticker
Raining SkyFire: You gotta be anti france regardless of party.
Raining SkyFire: France just sucks!
sUpEr FuNk oOx: FRANCE ROCKS!
Raining SkyFire: O.O
Raining SkyFire: OMG WTF STFUUUU
Raining SkyFire: >D
sUpEr FuNk oOx: i want to go there so bad
Raining SkyFire: Politcs rocks.
Raining SkyFire: Why do you want to go too...too...FRANCE
sUpEr FuNk oOx: its beautiful
Raining SkyFire: ::republicans cream::
Raining SkyFire: *Scream
sUpEr FuNk oOx: down with bush!
Raining SkyFire: XD
sUpEr FuNk oOx: when is the election
sUpEr FuNk oOx: sept?
sUpEr FuNk oOx: i thought u said bush was an idiot
Raining SkyFire: I LVOI UYOE!
Raining SkyFire: He's not politcally "Intelligent"
sUpEr FuNk oOx: lol
Raining SkyFire: but hes better than mr. flipper
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: ~.o
sUpEr FuNk oOx: Kerry?!
Raining SkyFire: YES
sUpEr FuNk oOx: HOW IS HE BETTER THAN KERRY!?
Raining SkyFire: HIS LOGO IS NOT A FLIP FLOP!
Raining SkyFire: HAHAHAHAHA
Raining SkyFire: >D
sUpEr FuNk oOx: what is his slogan
Raining SkyFire: o.o
Raining SkyFire: Wha?!
sUpEr FuNk oOx: i gotta pee
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: Im putting this on my blog
Raining SkyFire: RIGHT NOW
sUpEr FuNk oOx: what? the fact i have to piess?
Raining SkyFire: This whole converSATION
sUpEr FuNk oOx: NEH
sUpEr FuNk oOx is away at 2:42:58 PM.
Raining SkyFire: XD

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Auto response from sUpEr FuNk oOx: im running for president of the united states against Smurfy and i will win you stupid republican go die i have to pee
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am so mentally disturbed.
:sigh:

Party! Like it's...uh..1983. or maybe 94.

Smurfy — 2004-07-17T02:07:00-05:00

...

I can't even remember why Im blogging!

My mind, it slips

So last night, I was talking to these canadains on MSN or whatever, and theres this guy, "Pasqui"

He claims to have had a heart attack and to have gone into a coma for about a week, so I totally ...uh..Said something like

Smurfy: Why don't you just go have a heart attack again
Smurfy: Or maybe go into a COMA
Pasqui: -.-
(Pasqui who owns vermont has left the chat)
Smurfy: oh snap!
Someguy: OOOOOOHHHH
Daisy: LOL HUGZ!

I left shortly after that.

However terrifying it was.

But, BLAST IT I CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING AT ALL.

I got my angsty poetry disk and my Ham Radio guide and I'm all set.

It's GO time, suckers.

LETS ROCK!

Lee, philosopher or lunatic?

Smurfy — 2004-07-17T11:07:00-05:00

Man.

It's so amazing.

Lee, this..guy, who seems to have the conversational ability of a dead animal occasionlly, is like..

Anti-thesis.

So for the first time ever, Me sanders lee and jason, we're like

conversating

I mean like a true to life conversation where we expressed ideas and reflected on them open-mindedly without the endless immaturity that seems to invade a teenagers mind regardless of their active level of intelligence.

That was pretty cool.

But anyway. Enough of my psycho-babble. I know no one reads THIS blog for the insight into humanity.

Partially because I write stories about possesed bags of pasta. But that's ol' smurfy you know!

::sigh::

Anyway.

I displayed my RocketMan movie, and for the msot part people recieved it "Okay".

I expected to get more laughs, or, quite frankly, even a this movie sucks, but for the most part it was just like

"DUUUUHHHH..."

Gah, this song is so cool.
It's the theme song to rocketman

If you want to hear this grooviness, try

"Rocket" By Def Leppard

It's got a reeeeeally awesome bass line.
and the last 45 minutes gives me chill bumps when I think of how it was used in the movie.

If I ever get the bandwidth on this other site I'll psot these movies online.

FOR A PAYPAL PRICE.

GIMME URRR MONNEYYYY

Anyway.

I also publiclly showed off Remote Control Massacre for the first time...in it's.....er..slightly edited form.

Movies movies movies.

When I enter this 24-hour film festival in october, if I win, or of I even come close, I will be as proud as I can be.

Pride in the good form, not the obessesive over ego-fied pride you wouldn't want to experience. That's a very bad thing to have, that kind of pride.

I've gotten a request for another smurfo-story.

I'll get one going tommorow if I can.

Thanks for visiting, and have a wonderful day/afternoon/night/WHAT ARE YOU DOING ONLINE AT 4 IN THE MORNING HUH?, faithful bloggers.

Stay groovy,

"And for all time and eternity, all I could do would be to love you"

Watch out for zombies.

src="http://members.aol.com/chrispyk16/weird.gif">

I am Dr. Weird from Aqua Teen Hunger Force!!

Which Aqua Teen Hunger Force character are you??

New layout. New hairdo. STUPID CONTACTS

Smurfy — 2004-07-18T02:07:00-05:00

I'm only operating on one eye today, thanks to the wonderous invention, CONTACTS!

W00t.

Oh, screw it.

noooow

Alright

So, let's see what's going on in THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF SMURFFFFFY

Nothing

Alright!, now that that's over witht let's get onto the good stuff..like..uh..

Crap.

There's no good stuff.

Well, I did have homemade chinese food

"Just like grandma used to hate!"

That's the slogan on the box.
That's a really stupid slogan.

Tommorow I'll put in that applicatior that library job, which I would certainly love to "Have".

Ha.

Me, working.

Imagine that.

I can't.

But yes!
That reminds me of what I wnted to whine about today.
the post 80's generation.

That doesn't inculde smurfy as I'm..all..

80's generation

Whatever the heck we're calling ourselves.
Generation NEXT or
Maybe generation NOT THE STUPID POST 80'S GENERATION

whatever it is, I totally just lost my train of thought.

So screw that.

I got a request for a new smurfostory yesterday.

I'm filling that now:

(Next entry, TEE HEE. like, in an hour..trust me..it'll be a good'n.)

Stupid microwave radiation

Smurfy — 2004-07-18T02:07:00-05:00

Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me with Smurfy's Lurgy
Cause:	exposure to radiation
Symptoms:	fingernail biting, excessive restlessness, bulging eyes, coughing
Cure:	click heels together three times
Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:

KEN JENNINGS ROXORZ.

Your soul is OPEN-MINDED. Although you do have
strong opinions and make decisions, you never
make them without thinking first of not only
everything that is, but those that may not be
as well. People trust that you'll willingly
hear them out and understand when they tell you
something, and you are well-liked for it. You
are often the mediator in disputes and your
desire to do what is right overcomes all else.
You are an understanding and admirable soul.

What Is Your Soul's Trait?
brought to you by Quizilla

w00ty.

Smurfy — 2004-07-18T04:07:00-05:00

DOUBLE FEATURE

Great grandpa neighbor will's Story
Part I

"Hey Alex, come hop up here next to your neighbor, will, and I'll tell you a story"

And Alex did just that, but immedietlly asked:

"Great grandpa neighbor Will, why does your hair look so funny?"

Will immedietlly put the dunce cap on Alex and he began to cry!

"Aw, it's alirhgt. Seriously. Stop.

That's really annoying."

"SERIOUSLY KID SHUTUP"

But He continued to cry, yelling about the dunce cap.

So he just said:
"HERE KID HAVE A DISINTEGRATION BEAM!"
"YAY" came the reply. Alex loved being disentegrated. He had just gotten out of a 2 year stay being put back together a week before now.

But since this WAS the future, and it was okay to do so,
Will pulled out his vaporiszing gun and vaporized the kid, but continued with the story anyway.

"-----" Alex said.
"YOU SHUT YOUR DIRTY MOUTH" Screamed will.

"--".

Will then scooped up Alex's dusty remains and put in a call to 9111 ( In the future they had to make it longer due to 911 being taken over by a violent "HOTT TIMES" phone company.)

So, anyway, the moral of this story is:

If you can't figure out which button makes Mario jump then you really suck at your life and you need to go work at some accounting place.

But watch out for LEMURS!

The office lemurs.

..

I don't even know what I'm TALKING about anymore man.
I really don't.

PASTA DEMON:
Part II
This time it's EASY MAC.

Linda looked around quickly, weilding a package of kraft cheese.

"WHERE ARE YOU THOMAS?!" Yelled Linda.
"I'm right HERE you STUPID PASTA"
Thomas hit Linda with a spoon to the face because he believed her to be the pasta!

"MY NOSE! YOU IDIOT!"
She pulled Thomas over to the side of the cliff and almost poured the cheese on him.
"wait! YOUR THOMAS"
"AND YOUR LINDA!"

"Hey, (Linda said) Let's go to wal-mart. This possessed pasta hunt grows cold in my mind!"
"Lol" said Thomas.

They went to walmart!

WALMART

I freakin hate wal-mart.

The end!
Moral: If in pasta you are searching, go forth to walmart and be gone!

Pop-tarts

Smurfy — 2004-07-18T09:07:00-05:00

My experiences have taught me that if a certain said girl is mad at you because of your pop-tart consumption, it's best to agree with said girl and move on.

Those poptarts really are twisted.

SEE, I HAVE EVIDENCE!

See! THATS WHAT POPTARTS DO TO YOU!

Mark my words, I'll never stock up on s'mores poptarts again!

HAHA! NONSENSE!

Smurfy — 2004-07-19T02:07:00-05:00

You are a black and white cat. Can't you make up
your mind about what color you are??? You are
very indecisive, and not too stable. You can't
sit in one place, you need to explore, see new
things, perhaps you even have ADD...

What color of cat are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

HAHAHAHAHA....u..uh..
Bah.

Stupuid quizzes.

I got a haircut tommorow.

Well, that's it for the part of this blog where it makes sense. and I gotta knock that stupid picture down. It's NOT ME So stop asking. I'm the idiot in the jester hat that comes on behind the words.

The hott one. ~.o

last night, around midnight, this girl named GRENDAL BOURNAPEST or wahtever IMed me and said I knew her from school. When I asked what school she said

LOLYOURZ

How old are you?

17!!!! HAHAHAHA LOL

Are you sure?

lol I lied. Whoa re you Y ARE U TSLKING TO ME

IM REPORTING YOU!

Then she blocked me.

She must have been on AoHell. TO BAD IM NOT!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HA
A...

Oh shutup smurfy.

So yesterday evening, I decided to drive the smurfmobile randomly, and I went down to my great great grandfathers old house which is conveintly located on provate property I just sort of drove down the driveway then came back because there was suddenly a large light focused on my car

God bless accelleration.

But I had this crazy dream last night

I had played waaay to much time splitters 2. Way too much.

I was doing this thing where I put all these weak robots on one team(Chassis bots), so the onyl one on my team was me. Took me 45 minutes to finally beat the level, but This "ROBOT WAR" must have had some kind of adverse effect Where it causes me to believe I'm actually int he middle of a "ROBOT WAR"

So I fall asleep, but my dream picks up RIGHT as I'm going to sleep,

So Im looking at the cieling, but I decided to cut on my lamp. My lamp wouldn't cut on, but I noticed my closet door was open. but then my TV cut on, and started changing channels by itself, and went to channel 1218, which I thought was really weard, cause thats my brith month and day.

But when the tv faded from black, it had a picture of me on it, like some camera was looking at me. then when I looked at my closet door, it was shut, and I realized the horror moveis must have finally caught up to me. But then everything changed to daytime, and for some reason i was standing in front of 5000 Chassis bots. (from the game, they told me there was 5000)

They said we were fighting Crypt zombies, and I was to lead the chassis bots to victory.
Then suddenly, witht he binoculars I was looking through, I saw like, 10,000 crypt zombies running towards me. So I asked 200 chassis bots to come with me, and for the rest to sneak behind the zombies and surprise them, so we could run through and kill all the zombies. For some reason I was now Harry Tipper from timesplitters. I rpefer Hank nova myself. So all ym chassis bots have a minigun, while the zombies just have bricks.

>D

so my chassis bots are SLAMMING through the zombies numbers when all the sudden this chassis bot says

DID YOU EAT YOUR CHUNKEE NOODLE SOUP? BAIBAIBAIBAIBAIBAIBAIBYEUH BYE!

And I was watching arfenhouse for some reason..

Then I don't remember anything until I woke up.

Stupid zombie movies/timesplitters.

at least they werent spider-walkin.

Am I seeing things or was that like some kind of thought process right there?

How frightning.

I'm so odd.

Then this morining I realized my eyes were all weird yesterday because I had both my contacts in backwards. THATS why I couldn't see anything at all. HAHAHA.

I'm a genius.

POSSESED Pasta
______________
Part III
Dedicated to the only one who reads these things:
TropicalSkies! w00t!

"June, have you any idea what is walking around outside?"

"Nooo papa, I am currently lsitening to dashboard confessionals! so I cannot make any complete thought process without the words OH MY LIFE SUX popping into my head!"

"June, you are an idiot! HAHHAHAHA" Announced her borther strongly, who was preparing a beef stew.

Suddenly, the house began to shake!
THE POSSESED PASTA WAS NOW BREAKING ITNO THEIR HOUSE!

"JUNE QUICK GRAB THE AIR FRESHENER! HURRRRRY!"

However, June had turned the volume up, and she was RIGHT IN THE PASTAS PATH!

"JUNE! RUN!"

Her father and brother quickly ran from the house, but they heard nothing more!

Thnking quickly, Junes mother had made the pasta lsiten to JAY-Z AND TEH RAPPER DAWGS.

It exorcized itself and seeked out new pasta.

Will this pasta ever die?

Will smurfy ever just write something else?

Will he eat this stupid pot pie or will he throw it away?

TUNE IN NEXT TIME TOO:

SMURFY'S BLOG!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!! AAAA! NO! PASTA!!!!

HAHAHA!! I LOVE THIS SONG!

Smurfy — 2004-07-19T03:07:00-05:00

http://www.castlemountains.net/flashmar/A_Cup_Of_Joy.swf

And I've almost gone over 1500 hits now.

>D

YES.

Stupid quiz and OTHER stuff! d00d!

Smurfy — 2004-07-19T08:07:00-05:00

So We got the end of Jeopardy coming up. The end of jeopardy's regualr season...So regardless of how well Ken Jennings does this week, he'll be gone the next..;-;

"THE MUNCHIES, MAN!"

That's my saying from now on. If you piss me off, I'll say MUNCHIES MAN! and if you make paper origami swams I'll say, MUNCHIES,MAN!

GO! It's JEOPARDY TIME, SUCKER!

!!!!!!!!!!!

?!??!?! WHA?!??! YAMAUCHI?! WHY?!

91% Of The Internet Loves Me!

I am loved by 91% of the population, including:
12412 people who love people talking on cellular phones
33060 people who love happy people
27349 people who love people who like cake

In return, I love 77% of the population, including:
8551 morning people
17110 skinny people
20776 people who wear sweaters

show the love at spacefem.com

It's UPDATE time agaim, SUCKERS.

Smurfy — 2004-07-20T06:07:00-05:00

Hahahaha, I don't know why I typed that...Help..My head..

Gah.

Okay, onto the stuff that made sense today:

<>I got a haircut
<>...uh...
<>There..had to be something else..
<>! oh..wait no..yeah..I sadly had to go the mall.

WOO!

The end.

Okay, now for the beefed up detailed smurfy version of those events.

So, man, I woke up early this morning, like,

10:00! I almost couldn't STAY awake. Jeez..so..EARLY..
I live off my own sarcasm.

Anyway.

After me and the rest of the "Family" borded the "Mini-Van"

We departed off for a day of mortal agony and delusions.

Or errands.

Whatever, same thing.

Painful agony 1: Trip to some diet place to pick up some random crap.

Painful agony 2: Take random crap to CPA office and get "cheques"

Painful Agony 3: Go to the Mall. OH THE MALL. NO NO NO NO.
There is no greater painfula gony then standing with your sister and mother at "CLAIRES!!!!". UGH. You just CRINGE at the sight of those accursed stores!! PAINFUL!!

Painful Agony 4: Retuarant. Bojangles. Freakin store. Egh.

Painful Agony 5: Go back to diet place and take "CHEQUES" back. Yes cheques, thats actually the correct way to type it.

Painful Agony 6: Haircut. I shaved off my grooviness in favor of a less "ITS FRIGGIN ALIVE! HOLY CRAP!" look.
Now it just looks stupid.

Painful Agony 7: I forget that one

Pa..Oh screw this dude,

Also on this road trip of horrors, I was taken to "Roses"

You might remember them if your not from the post-80's generation.

Back when they were cooler than walmart or kmart.

OI!

So while I was there, we asked the assistance of what appeared to be a mentally challeneged employee.

"Sir," we asked,
"Could you get those boxes down for us?"

The man mumbled to himself, looked around, looked at me in particular, then said,

"What?"

After explaining the dire situation once more, the man retrieved a ladder and slammed it violently down, explaining under his breath that "That was the only way..etc."

After getting down the lids and boxes he started talking about how much assitant managers sucked, and I sort of slipped out of the conversation zone in favor of some place to laugh violently. Because I'm a jerk like that.

But it suddenly took a less favorable TWIST, as he began following me around. Now, being the wuick thinker I am, I stopped and checked out the garden hoses.

"Nice garden tools they are, those tools for gardening right there! Hahahaha"

I quickly retreated to the safety of the candy aisle, and I appeared to lose him. I noticed soon afterward that he was following some other people. I found that amusing and liked the way they kept looking at him and going faster.

His name,

"Kevin"

Frightning as it is, I will never forget the "Only way" to set up a ladder. Bang it violently on the ground while talking to yourself. Then again, working in Roses may be thecause of this insanity. Will the world ever know?

Also noted in my mental power arena, is that "The Mall" is for some reason full of people who do not like you for some reason.

They freaking RAN me over with a bloody shopping cart. TWICE.

TWICE!

so after all these insane encounters of the saddening kind, I was told we were going to "GYMNASTICS CLASS" for my darling sister to runa round and attempt excerrcises of some sort.

I spent more time watching out the 16-19 year old instructor chicks. Because I'm an idiot, and I CAN. SILENCE!

After returning home, I realized the one thing I wanted to do, buy some cans of sundrop, was unaccomplished. That means..TOMMOROW...oh..Oh my..

FEAR THE WAL-MART FOOLS!

POSSESED PASTA
Part III

Ah, screw that, I got another joke today.

THE COFFIN

There was this guy coming home from work one day, when his car stopped.

He looked at the engine and it was ALL messed up, just totalled, so he left it on the side of this suburban street, by a church. It wasn't far from his house, so he'd just walk. He needed the excersise anyway.

So as he began to walk, he heard a distant

"THUMP...THUMP...THUMP"

Looking around, he saw a COFFIN, bouncing, up and down, coming towards him.

Thinking it was just some really odd guy, the man began to continue to walk towards his house. Whenever he looked back at the coffin, it would be

"THUMP...THUMP..THUMP"ing towards him.

So he began to walk a little faster, getting kind of nervous.

The faster he got, the faster the coffin got! He could see his house in the distance now, so he flat out ran for the door. When he got to the door, he realzied his keys were still in the car. there appeared to be no one home,a nd the coffin was at the end of drive way now!

"THUMP THUMP THUMP" it came, coming closer and closer!
The man JUMPED through the window, and ran up the steps, to look out the window.

Suddenly, the coffin started POUNDING against the door, so violently the cieling was flaking!

"BAM!" The coffin was through the door. It stopped, then began slowly bouncing towards the stairs.

"NO!!"
Cried the man, as he ran for the only door upstairs with a lock, the bathroom. As he got in, he slammed the door and locked it tight, sitting against a wall, catching his breath. But then he heard it again!

"bump,bump,THUMP"

The coffin was climbing the steps!

As it climbed to the top of the stairs, it grew silent

The man held his breath, prepared for the worst. Then: "BAM BAM BAM BAM" It was bouncing to the door, pounding it with it's mighty weight.

Then it busted in!

There was nowhere to go! The coffin was quickly thumping towards him! He looked for something, ANYTHING to halt the coffins path towards him!

All's he could get his hands on were come cough drops! He threw them at the thumping terror!

Suddenly

The coffin stopped.

-Smurfy

Woah! Two updates! SPICY.

Smurfy — 2004-07-20T09:07:00-05:00

"What is..Roll-on..Like the deoderant!"

--KEN ROXORZ--
-35 Day Total winnings record setting CHAMPION-

Also I have more pointless poll things.

Can Ken Conquer Wedenesday? HAHAHA YESSSSSSSSSS.

...

It's YooHoo time, suckers.

(Vote for roxiemohammed in the best of mindsay layout! http://bestof.mindsay.com )

And check out that new header eh?

SEXY!

HAHAHA!!!!!

Smurfy — 2004-07-21T09:07:00-05:00

Yeah, suckers.

No update today(except for this one, I'm cynical.) because I'm a fat lazy disgusting excuse of a pig.

EXPECT HOTTNESS TOMOROW!

In the meantime check out that killer heading.

Took me all of 14 seconds to make!!

w00t!

They set us up THE BOMB! Freakin' right we did.

Smurfy — 2004-07-22T11:07:00-05:00

I just love that quote.

Best game "EVAR" right there.

Hm, okay

So after a day's vacation playing TimeSplitters for 4 straight hours, my eyesight once again began to fail me, and I realized after taping some sessions of me palying timesplitters that for some reason I don't blink very much at all while I play that game.

This is unusual, yes.

That's why after I play my eyes are all red and bloodshot and...GAH LOOK THERES THE PASTA

::runs to a new subject::

Ominous mistake number 1: I was told to fill up "THE CAT HOPPER"

This device is what feeds my mortally retarded cats, like ...like..FERRET

(insert yell here)

Now, in this mistake, I decided to go downstairs and pour the "CAT FOOD" into the "Hopper"

Mistake number two of mistake number 1.

I'm still picking up the cat food, because, see, the bag of "CAT FOOD" burst open whilst I was pouring, ensuring me that I would not be having an easy day.

Then ferret came down to join me, and ultimately I just got scratched and she ran under the steps where she sits until this hour, SCREAMING IN MY HEAD.

That cat's one messed up bag of fur.

And by bag I mean cat.

Ominous mistake 2:

I turned in my job app. for this job, and they informed me they "FROZE THE HIRING PROCESS FOR A TIME..HERE, HAVE A FREE SUCKER!"

I hate lime flavored suckers.

Ominous mistake number 2:

I was seemingly out of "Cereal" so I had to resort to pop-tarts.

EVIL POP-TARTS!

Now my face is going to cave in.

::cough::

As I was saying...

Hahaha, got you,

You thought I had a topic didn't you?

HAHAHAHA NO!

I was enjoying more Aqua Teen Hunger Force last night.
My hero is Dr. Weird.

South Jersy, yo.

"I NEED TO LOSE ANOTHER 20 POUNDS...OR I'll NEVER BE PRETTY!

Also, as many of you have already seen, This flash roxorz.

This Land is your land! THE POLITICAL VERSION.

Hahaha, look, HTML, w00t.

...

I'm REALLY rambling today, ain't I?

So, for now, SO LONG

The Possesed Pasta
PART I FORGET
(EndGame)

"YES!" Cried great uncle Pete.
"The pasta is now on it's way to Australia" He said proudly.
"After all these years..possesing HERMIT CRABS...I NOW have the POWER to possess PASTA."

Pete was really really sad up in the brain region.

"And now" Pete said,
"NOW THE REAL WAR BEGINS"

Pete pressed a flashing orange button on a small control panel. Suddenly, alarms began going off all over the base. THE UNDERGROUND BASE.

All of a sudden, As pete continued laughing in delight, Airplanes, and TANKS, and SUBMARINES began appearing all over the French radar.

"ZACRE BLU"! They announced,

"IT'S POLITICAL SATIRE FROM THE LIKES OF SMURFY!"

Will the french guys get blown up? Will I offend half my readers? WILL THEY REALIZE I'M AN IDIOT!?!?!

WILL I EVER SHUTUP?!?!?!

Yes!

-Smurfy
But FIRST, Here's a way wiggy song by SmashMouth..I think it applies to smurfy..XD

Hot
(Get the Picture album)
Hey, so you wanna play
You’ll see my game’s on fire
And we don’t play the same game
You’ll see i’m greedy for speed
And neutral means nothin’ to me
So if that’s your desire
We’ll get along famously
Just one thing’ I like to lead you’ll see
I light ‘em up before the motor starts
I go so fast that i could never stop
Look under the hood but you don’t know what i’ve got
I’m a moving violation baby
Hot! Hot! Hot! Hot!
Highway, that’s my scene
I may look like a blur when you see me
And i mean i’m flirtin’ with disaster
I'm the master of g’s
Goin’ faster, gonna pass ya
Gonna blast some dust your way
And I say you got skills and somethin’ to prove
But you’re in my way so you better move
One foot on the peddle and the other in the grave
So don’t give me a reason I got a license to rage
I light ‘em up before the motor starts
I go so fast that i could never stop
Look under the hood but you don’t know what i’ve got
I’m a moving violation baby
Hot! Hot! Hot! Hot!

Stupid bandwidth

Smurfy — 2004-07-22T02:07:00-05:00

I killed my bandwitdh for my stupid pictures.

KILL villagephotos.com!!

BANDWITDH MURDERES

Smurfy — 2004-07-22T03:07:00-05:00

I fixed, the powerful issue.

And just to show photovillage whos boss I went somewhere else and added a BOTTOM pic. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

"What do you want me to do? SIGN YOUR FREAKING YEARBOOK?!"
-ATHF said it best.

Magical updates 'n such.

Smurfy — 2004-07-23T05:07:00-05:00

Due to the complications of a baseball game, my update will be later. Like in... 4 hours.

SO LONG SUCKERS! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

"Oh for the love of, DR. FEAR GET OFF THE FLOOR" - Master Scar

Smurfy — 2004-07-24T12:07:00-05:00

Man.

What a SUCKY end to a SUCKY SUCKY two days.

And by Sucky I obviously mean Not sucky.

I talked to Brittany, and she got some random faceless boyfriend who doesn't exist. So I just yelled about that.

Stupid nameless boyfriend.

So last night I was "Volunteered" to clean up the concession stand at the football field. If you saw the stuff that builds up in those places you would never ever EVER eat ANY food at a concession stand, much less a restuaraunt, ever EVER again. EGH.

so 5 hours of grease haulin' later and moving and waxing and doin' all this crazy stuff,

I just got a 4 month old Mt. Dew and drove off in the smurfmobile listening to CLASSIC ROCK 92. or maybe 100 point whatever. Some classic rock station.

I re-discovered my good ol' friend Melody's screename, and immedietelly began talking to her about the same stuff I talked to her about 7 or 8 months ago.

Aye. You know how I am.

then today:

TODAY.

Absolutely nothing intresting.

I went to watcht he warthogs, they lost, woosh, wooptydoo.

Then they had fireworks and for some reason I got inspired to make a movie with actual character development.

Then I realized I was single and how annoying that was.

I do that alot during the summer, listening to other people tell of how they get so sick of their relationships, and I'm like, man, I wish i could get sick of MY relationships.

But, you know how that is.

Oh, DadGUMMIT, I just ealized I just missed Conan..curses..

Well.

I'm jabbering again.

And those fireworks there at the ballfield SUCKED..sort of..not really..they did have some pretty humongouesly huge ones.

Anyone else noticed that there have been like, alot of new styles of fireworks this year?

When I was little all's I remmeber are regular boom yellow or blue fireworks and maybe a few willow tree ones and those screamers. now they have all these cool colors and shapes within shapes and stuff. Maybe I just never saw the right fireworks.

Also, on the Ken Jennigs front,

He won.

And on Jay Leno last night, (Which Ken was on)

he said when the season starts again in september, HE WILL BE BACK ON.

Dude, YES.

Ken ROXORZ!

He's never going to lose man. Never.

BWHAHAHAHAHA.

Of course.. I would want to lose sometime..otherwise you'd never get no moneh. ::nods:: anyway...

Also, a note of smurfy, when you are sitting between an angry toddler and a fat black guy, anger the toddler. not the fat guy.

I can only describe the results of the other combination in a purely frigthning memberance of terror.

Poor guy.

Also, while I was at the baseball field, this kid, like, randomly falls over and his shoe hits me in the head.

Freaking Fate.

I'll actually have some posts tommorow. I just need to finish off my yoohoo now.

Talk to me in the posts man, later!

-Groovy Smurfy, over and AWAY! OW! TREE!

What the HECK is wrong with that freaking DOG

Smurfy — 2004-07-24T02:07:00-05:00

So the first thing that happened today was I awkaened by my mom talking into the answering machine for 30 minutes or so trying to wake us up, which unfortunettly succeeded.

Annoying things like that, that kind of stuff. Just makes me want to infilict pain upon the rocking chairs on my porch.

But then, as I am awake and seeking pop-tarts and hot pockets, I hear the noise which I hear often, My dachsund barking his tiny tiny little barking head off.

So I look out the window, then at the road, and there's this..tiny little dog running up and down the street.

I have no idea what the heck was going on there.

I just let it sliiiiiide

As I drank my Yoohoo and orange mountain dew.

God bless yoohoo, I tell you what man.

I also got an invitation for a corndog from Roxie. Now that's friendship right there.

I just got alerted to the fact that I'm about to leave for food.

So, ah..I'll probably have more SMURFALICIOUS updates when I return.

Which will be later.

I need to find another good joke for on here, don't I. you know, my really really classy jokes.

The jokes that suck, yes, those jokes.

But in the meantime I'm gonna listen to that groovy Smash mouth album, Get the picture.

...

Okay, now I'm listening to the groovy album, Get the picture.

You can't tell because this is a BLOG.

This doesn't REALLY exist, it's just tricking you into thinking that.

Because it can!

"L.O.L."

Ever notice those quoatation marks point the same way?
"Look"

Now that just looks retarded man. So here, have a quote from an episode of ATHF.

" It's all starting to add up now isn't it,
the levitation,
the EVVVVIL book reading,
them crème cookies you always eatin'.

You're a WITCH."
" Oh yeah,
well what are you gonna do about it?'
"...
Eat Pizza.
PIZZA TIME! PIZZA TIME!"

Good episode right there.

Anyone on here bought that new dvd box set?

Also, last not I noticed that the sprite mascot is called "Thirst"

So what they have done, is decided the physical incarnation of your "Thirst" sense, is actually a small doll-sized black man with a really bad afro.

I was quite confused by this, and I still am quite frankly.

Is thirst racist? Am I racist by wanting MY thirst sense to lose the 'fro? it tickles the throat, you know.

So, the next point I need to make is that there wasn't a point. I just TRICKED you.

"And we'll float on okay..and we'll all float on okay! and we'll okay float on okay! and we'll float on anyway!"

Man that song roxorz.

But I dunno, that song by franz ferdinand is pretty groovy too...Bah,.

I'm jabbering again.

I SHALL POST AGAIN SUCKERS!

w00t!

I'm a moving violation baby,

Hot. Hot. HOT!
-Smurfy
(don't step in that!)

I AM 39% HIPPIE!

I need to step away from the tie-dye. I smell too good to be a hippie and my dad is probably a cop. Being a hippie is not a fashion craze, man. It was a way of life, in the 60’s, man.

Take the HIPPIE test at Fuali.com

I am SO more hippie than THAT.

UGH!

Update Number 2 of alot more random sausage links!!

Smurfy — 2004-07-24T09:07:00-05:00

Woah..weird..Ever had a rolling blackout sweep by your power box?

Sucks man.

Yeah, right on smurfy.

HEAR HEAR!

No, I disagree entirely, it's necessary for the safety of our country.

Now, on that subject,

I heard on FOX NEWS Network recently of how it was banned in Canada, and Al-Jazeera network is allowed, and I know a few Canadians from some old websites I used to frequent, so I asked them about the matter.

It's quite an eye opener, let me tell you.

Fox news was described as being "Propaganda that controls the government"

I asked, so what about CNN?

"CNN doesn't have Bill O'reiley"
__________________________________
Frequently using the term "Evil Empire" to describe America, I asked why they chose to name it so,

Some reasons given were:

1. We had destryoed Cuba (?) because of our trade neglections. CUba would have a successful communistic countyr had we not "Royally screwed them over"

I have no idea how suddenly we've screwed over cuba, but let's keep going.

2. Bush is satan,& Clinton was evil. I guess we need Ralph Nader then, apprently.

Speaking again on "Successful Communism" I don't believe that's actually possible.

In theory, it's magnificent, But with so much power onto so few people, it is impossible to keep them in check. As you can see throughout history, even if America doesnt "Royally screw them over" it just doesn't work, at least after a short time anyway.

I asked them about American emotion, in pop-culture.

It's not necessarily negative, they say, comparing most americans opinions of france, But just a sort of, "They are so SCREWED" kind of thing. Which I don't really mind. All's they have is beavers and hockey anyway.

Alright, I'm done with my political banter. Hope it was actually worth reading.

I enjoy these brief run in's into intellectual properties, but they spark to much debate, and I freakin' hate debate.

Anyway.

Now, moving from night to day, here is the shocking conclusion to the Pasta Saga.

Prologue
The pasta had now taken over a large wal-mart center on Morning Lane, after it spread it's infectios curse upon other products. They had possessed shopping carts, garden gnomes, anything you could imagine. Some even called this disturbing possession, ZOMBIE FEVER!

"I knew it was bad luck the first time I saw that pasta kill that squirrel" Remarked Old Man Wilson to the newspaper.
"It ate it right up! Like some kind of crazy possessed pasta! which it might JUST have been!" he said with a wink, at the obviously drunk newspaper reporter. She wasn't single, sadly.

After several failed attempts to regain Control of the wal-mart, which was ground zero for the nefarious, now called, "Zombie pasta gang"

They had armed Zombie guns, pacing around the stores, Stuffed animals lurking behind corners, in packs full of non-explosive north carolina fireworks. The deadly spark shooting kind.

But what they didn't count on, Was Great-Grand-Cousin Will, showing up with his new product, The Black Hole®

Will was talking to the drunk newspaper reporter woman, who was still not single.

"What I plan to do," he said.
"Is show these zombie producsts who's boss. I only have one Black Hole, and it will stay open for ten minutes. But it's gravitational pull is so ..Oh wow..hey..I thought you were Single?!" Suddenly the report ended.

Three days later, backed by an entourage of media coverage, was great-grand-cousin will, with a sealed crystal colored box, which contained, The Black Hole®.

Will turned to the reporters with a nod and said
"I'll be back" (SMURFY PAYS $5,000,000,000 in royalty fees to terminator creators).

And so, he marched with his riot armour on. Almost immedietlly spraks began flying, bullets began pouring into the press area, several members being shot, But Will kept walking forward.

"You could sense his determiantion to destroy the evil pasta" One witness later told the paper.

Once inside, a mysterious bluish veil covered the store. But the ground began shaking! Explosions were going off intensly inside the store, cries of doom from the pasta emerged, and bullets continued to flood the store. All witnesses outside were now seeking protection behind cars.

As the crowd stared in awe, the entire building began collapsing in on itself.

"NO! JAKE!" Cried a member of the press.
"His names Great-grand-Cousin Will, the drunken newspaper reporter corrected. And I'm going to save him." She said sternly.

"Save him? But isn't he going to come out alright anyway?!" The crowd became confused.

The drunken reporter handed them a piece of paper, which scribbles on it.

"To whom it may concern.
If you are now reading this, the pasta took control of the world, or I controlled the pasta. Either way, I am now dead. The black hole will consume me as well. I only hope that one day we will be able to shop at walmart again.

Sincerly,
Grand Cousin Will."

"But...he said..he'd.." Several of the stand byer's broke down into tears, other's were obviously confused as they couldn't read the note at all.

"Now worries, Mate" she said.
"I will save Will."

"NO YOU WON'T!" Announced Evil Andy.
"WHA!!!" The crowd turned around, as Evil Andy pointed the gun at the drunken reporter.

"I was the one who originally created the possesed "Zombie" pasta. I WILL NOT LET MY CREATION DIE!" He yelled and walked close to the drunken reporta we will now call "Mindy".

But, in a dash to save Wll, She ran anyway, dodging shots from evil andy.

"NO! WILL MUST DIE! AND YOU..UH..YOU DO TOO! HAHAHAHA!"
Andy chased after Mindy, and they both entered the quaking collapsing store.

Several minutes of breathless watching later, and the entire store began to fade out of existince.

"NO! WILL! 'MINDY'!" The corwd responded. But just as the store disappeared 3, or was it FOUR figures jumped out of the energy field.

it was Will AND Mindy, who was no longer single by the way.

The celebrations were underway, and a brand new even bigger wal-mart was being built.
No one noticed, the floating pice of fettucinni, moving swiftly towards the setting sun.

-Smurfy

Because I can

Smurfy — 2004-07-25T04:07:00-05:00

I am now making a boring repititve sprite comic like everyone else in the world.

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/GroovySmurfy/243360

DONT LOSE YOUR MIND!

And after all that crazy blogging I did last night, I'm going on hiatus on the posting front to work on this comic. and by Hiatus I mean like 1 day.

And by one day I mean I'll probably update tonight.

And by tonight, I mean I'm updating right now.

because I can.

Also check out the COMIC
http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/GroovySmurfy/243360

It's FUNNY. HAHAHA.

It's like my blog with PICTURES.

It's amazingly groovy!

POST ON MY BLOG FOOLS!

Smurfy's analysm

Smurfy — 2004-07-25T08:07:00-05:00

Remember back to when you were 5 or 6 years old? When you would be at a park or something and you'd see the "big kids", like, the teenagers, and you'd think to yourself, "I really really wish I could be a big kid, then I'd be cool". And then you'd run offand play freeze tag or jump off the swings and just be really carefree about things.

And then when your 15, and you sit around, looking at the little kids jumping around and playing games as they make them up on the fly, and you think to yourself quietly:

"I really really wish I could be a little kid again"

Stupid copycats.

Smurfy — 2004-07-25T11:07:00-05:00

Oh, so now EVERYONE get's a webcomic. POSERS! ALL OF YOU!

Cap'n! we're out of Ombaoojiebaseo!

Smurfy — 2004-07-26T11:07:00-05:00

That's a korean word there, ombaoojiebaseo. It means confused.

mmhm.

Before I begin my daily rampage of webcomics and crap like that, I have to ask myself:
"Why do people come here"

And to answer that I say:
I have No FREAKING idea.

Posslby, it may have something to do with the amount of "HUMOR" But, that may not necesaarily be the case.

Becasue after I empty my head of my thoughts, onto this "BLOG" I often read it and think: "What the HECK am I talking about here"

But then I got 62 responses we're people sign annonymously and say: "HEAR HEAR" or "LONG LIVE THE COURT JETSER"

Those kinds of things, right there.

Kind of odd isn't it?

It sure is man,
Let me tell you.

So for now, I bid thee adieu. For further sexy smurfy goodness, you could check my webcomic whihc is laughed at the world over.

Beautiful, you know?

So remember, Hold on to your IQ folks. That is all.

SEACREST OUT!

GAH. I HATE that guy. SEACREST OUT. WHA?! Like it's some kind of coming of age CATCH PHRASE?
NO!
YOU'RE JUST STUPID! SEACREST, GAY!

-Smurfy

Confound these evil addictive webcomics!

Smurfy — 2004-07-26T07:07:00-05:00

So my dad's truck blew up yesterday. Thatw as intresting. Timing thingy broke and the engine destroyed itself. Alot of fun to see, let me tell you what guys.

I also ended up making around 50-1900 web comics

Man, addictive!

I even have a storyline. Isn't that weird? A storyline!

Imagine that.

In the last story Melanie and Carl, tired of being killed constantly by Lee, Jason and me, combines their evil powers to make the WTFRU monster.

It absorbed everyone, Jaclyn, byron, Chad, brooke, Jason, some random cowboy, and AGENT SKWRIL and caused lee to ignite himself on fire. and began reampaging around the world. Jason (televisionman) used his GO TIME powers to blow up wtfru, then was believed to be dead. He dug himself out of his own grave and went back to his kickin' zombie heads off master Jowintza. They were forced to go public with the fact jason was alive after the corrupt forces at channel 3 began broadcasting fake-Jason reports to raise their very sad ratings. What will happen next?

Apparently melanie and carl have just created what they call "The ultimate evil-doer" which will destroy Smurfy and his friends once and for all. Will they suceed? WHO KNOWS!

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/GroovySmurfy/243360

It's up there^ because my HTML left my head. And because I'm an idiot!

Haha.

Smurfy — 2004-07-27T11:07:00-05:00

"Man..STUPID freshman...I mean no offence to you..or you..or any of you..but ...STUPID Freshman!"
-The late great Wayne Miller

Blah blah blah blah Freshmen blah blah

Smurfy — 2004-07-27T05:07:00-05:00

Brooke is hip.
Brooke is "with it"
Brooke didn't scream in pain after listening to me jabbering for 3 or 4 hours.
w00t.

Talking to me is like reading this blog except it makes less sense.

I couldn't stand myself if I was anyone else, honestly.

So everyone had no idea where the freshmen were. Turns out they hnad left 2 hours earlier then we showed up. because everyone has no idea of anything at all.

For some reason Melanie became evil and got all crazy again today.

I have a bit of the dialog saved in my head.

Brooke:"You ever read smurfy's comic?"
Melanie:"Noooo"
Brooke: "He has you walking around and saying cleavage"
Smurfy: "Oh yeah. I needed a villain. Your with Carl"
Melanie: "WE'RE NOT EVEN FRIENDS ANYMORE"
Smurfy: "I needed a villain though"
Mel: "I'm not a villain, YOUR the villain"
Smurfy: "Right, right"
Melanie: "You just don't have any common sense"
Byron: "Isn't it the other way around?"
Brooke: "Why don't you like smurfy again?"
Melanie: "Oh it's a LONG story"
Smurfy: "not really"
Byron: "You know she's driving a spike through your face smurf?"
Smurfy: "Yeah...I got scars from that, right here on the left"
Byron: "Dude the spike is about as big as your leg"
Brooke: "McSmurf'ms we need to find more freshmen"
Byron: "Smurfy, you are my personal jesus"

The jesus thing came later but I got to lazy.

Man, why can't you just let the old things DIIIIIIEEEE.

Sure, she DOES walk around in my comic screaming cleavage alot, but she has a frightening amount of cleavage. Frightning.

That's just part of my Mr. Telford routine that alot of people felt was funny. So I ressurected it for my own happy use. So anywho. I'm sure there will be more clashes of the ego later on. w00t! So for now.

I'm going back to west again tommorow, probably with Brooke again, unless sarah shows up. It's not like we're actually working anyway.

Also, anyone else here know that Stefanie oppermun and Chad are going out now?

Brace yourself for some craaaaazy emotional rollercoaster rides.

Stay hip, suckerz.

Raining SkyFire: Man, blast it.
Raining SkyFire: I wish you rode my bus again.
Raining SkyFire: I want to make them NOT sit in the back so much.
Raining SkyFire: but if I say
Raining SkyFire: HEY IDIOTS MOVE
Raining SkyFire: they'll be like
Raining SkyFire: omg wtf u die smurfy
BonziBuddyX: How would Jason being there help that?
Raining SkyFire: uh...
BonziBuddyX: I mean, then our combined weight would be more, but..
Raining SkyFire: backup.
BonziBuddyX: That's about it.
Raining SkyFire: Shoot.
Raining SkyFire: your right
Raining SkyFire: at least I'd have someone to witness me getting beat by a freshie
Raining SkyFire: or jarrod going
Raining SkyFire: ::cracking knucles::
Raining SkyFire: THIS YEAR PUNK
Raining SkyFire: LOL
BonziBuddyX: Ooh, yeah..
BonziBuddyX: Good point.
BonziBuddyX: He did say that, didnt he?
Raining SkyFire: ah..yeah..
Raining SkyFire: Maybe we'll get lucky and he'll forget
Raining SkyFire: otherwise he'll stab me on the first day
BonziBuddyX: Man, that would suck.
BonziBuddyX: "TOWN GOON STABBED TO DEATH BY LARGE BLOB"
BonziBuddyX: Worst headline ever.
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: Dude, that's jilarious
Raining SkyFire: I'm seriously "Laughing out loud"
BonziBuddyX: Haha, L.O.L, as you would say!

-SMURFY!

Smurfy's comic: Overdone or not done enough?

Smurfy — 2004-07-28T04:07:00-05:00

Response A:
"Dude,Smurfy! Your comic got boring all the sudden! What's up with it?!"

Visitors reponse:? Leave one.

Duuudeee

Smurfy — 2004-07-28T04:07:00-05:00

The freshmen this year are extremely evil and/or stupid.

Also Byron holds the dance dance hand puzzle.

THE DANCE DANCE HAND PUZZLE.
I do hope brooke got her sunburn fixed. Her face looks odd when it's upside down. The poor girl.

I got home today to get the realization that a guy I knew was coming over here to get the camper off the truck we had that exploded. Of course I had to take the C-Clapms off with a wrench, then we found the non-wrenchy thing.

Blasted 9/16th socket thing.

I have no idea what that means. Also I can write music. Also also is a stupid word.

Anyway, I gave the memo to Mr. Telford (THE PRINICPAL OF DOOM) that will allow me to do the morning announcements. If no one is else get's to do it...>\...

He'd better lemme. He said I could.

C'moooon Mr. Telllford... Make sure to drop a post about my comic series..

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/GroovySmurfy/243360

Haha. My html sucks.

WORDDDDD

Smurfy — 2004-07-29T02:07:00-05:00

Man.

Just a little over a week left before school stars all over again. ;-;

Although for the most part I'm looking forward to it. I miss my socially inedept friends who can't carry a conversation and all suck at everything. mmhm.

But besides that. After a healthy conversation about apyware with brooke and arguing about how erin passed out on a mountain was entertaining, I left my house for a visit up-the-road and gathered a newspaper. I waited for the mail, but came it did not. Stupid mailmail what a waste of my precious gas that was. Accursed 30 dollars a fill up! EVIL!

and thats why your BALD.

I noticed my blog was starting to taper off in terms of update quality, and I place blame solely on that comic. Which roxorz, by the way.

So I did my usual SMURFY research, and developed a blog lifespan.

Blog birth- categorized by posts that describe every pointless detail of everything. No feelings, no emotion, just words.
Firey young teenage blog- Emotion! content! feeling! very groovy stage
Middle age blog- fewer updates, less changes, more of a "Nothing happened today" kinda flavor
Dying blog- updates once or twice a week with fewer than 1 or 2 paragraphs of information
Dead blog- lyrics. Just lyrics.

When you see a blog with 5 entries in a month, then 3 or more posts with just lyrics, it is dead. It can be ressucitated, but it would take more work then most are willing to loan.

"TEH MOOR U KNO!"

FEAR THE EVILING OF YOUR OWN DOOM!

Smurfy — 2004-07-30T11:07:00-05:00

I dunno, I just think that title would make a good black and white horror movie.

Which reminds me I forogot about the zombie movie script.

Haha, you thought this was a worthwhile entry! WRONG!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Suckers.

I have an actual "Update" on my life's current situation and pasta story to come Later . So don't get to cocky.

>D

Later, foolio's.

SMURFY

Man

Smurfy — 2004-07-30T04:07:00-05:00

Haha, tricked you again, there ISN'T going to be worthwile reading entry today!

>D

Stuff that into your car engine and ignite it.

I did find this intresting away message. It made me go: "heh..'L.O.L.'"

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'." -Chris Rock

2:29pm - When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.

A good way to threaten somebody is to light a stick of dynamite. Then you call the guy and hold the burning fuse up to the phone. "Hear that?" you say. "That's dynamite, baby."

Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.

I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadors came up to you and asked where the gold was, I don't think it would be a good idea to say, "I swallowed it. So sue me."

I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye.

To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.

Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."

If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn't open, and you friends are all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were swimming.

I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver. and since he is so busy, you'd probably have to run up to him real quick and give it to him.

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.

It's true that every time you hear a bell, an angel gets its wings. But what they don't tell you is that every time you hear a mouse trap snap, and Angel gets set on fire.

If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them

SCHEDULES!

Smurfy — 2004-07-31T01:07:00-05:00

*#&(&# WEST AND THEIR STUPID MAIL DELIVERY.

MY SCHEDULE IS LOST!

Nevermind

Smurfy — 2004-07-31T01:07:00-05:00

1. Eng 2 hn.- fergusson
2. Theater arts II - hubbard
3. Geometry - Storey
4. Biology Hn. - Felder
5. Spanish 1 - Olsen
6a. P.E. - Casey
6b. Health - McConnell
7. Civics / economics Hn -Clayburn

Mrs. Fergussen seems like trouble

Sing, a simple song, one more time.

Smurfy — 2004-08-01T05:08:00-05:00

Everybody, hamster dance.

Man.

No idea why I brought that up. No idea at all. What a tiring day. I discovered that my theater class is going to deeply rock this coming year. Sure, everyone in the whole world said I should switch english classes while I still can, but hey, I need the expereince of havingbad teachers so I can tell people I've had horrible teachers. Makes for good conversation you know. And boy do I enjoy my conversations.

Yep.

I also caught up with Barry and Robin Cohen today. I rather enjoy those guys. And I don't get to see themt hat much, so it was really cool to see her and barry again.

w00t.

I think I'm going to slow down on the webcomics too. I think I'm going to do 5 a day instead of 25 or 30.

Just to justify the plot. Which is nonexistent. BUT HEY! You know smurfy.

http://www.stripcreator.com/comics/GroovySmurfy/243360 (just a hint.)

I always end up being more compassionette and intelligent when I'm more on the tired side. Not one hundred different random thought going about my head. Just twenty five. So it makes for a better blog, you know?

I have open house thursday, so I will meet with this..english teacher...might get a little evil, but, it remains to be seen.

I think I'm going to go off and post some crap on some other people's blogs now.

Because I can.

So I'll catch up with you guyzo's lataro.

w00t; and so long.

Smurfy.

HOT FOR THE TEACHER!

Smurfy — 2004-08-02T11:08:00-05:00

Man.
God bless Van Halen, I tell you what man.

Haha, I said man twice.

HOT FOR THE TEACHER!

Best drumline/guitars/OMG VAN HALEN ROCKS.

I got it bad! SO BAD! I'm hot for teacher....

>D

If I ever became a teacher I'd so be the one caught making out with the freshmen chicks.

You know smurfy.

The idiot.

GAH!

So, I'm fixing this pot pie. It's a chicken pot pie.
As in

WARNING DO NOT PREPARE IN TOASTER OVEN.

Guess what I did?
I used a toaster over.

Guess what? haha, it exploded. Like. POOM YOU JUST WASTED 1.35 ON A POT PIE THAT IS NOW TOASTER CRUMBS.

I hate pot pies.

FOILED AGAIN!
BY THE PIE!

That makes me amd though, I mean

What difference does it make if I'm using a CONVENTIONA..Oh screw that. Some idiot is just gonna post on blog about how neurons inside toaster ovens produce evil trolls and thusly your pies blow up. Idiot blog posters.

You know what I mean.

Those guys,

That know EVERYTHING about oven trolls.

I HATE THOS GUYS.

Flag.

"But then my homework was NEVER quite like this!"

What a wiggy song fools.

LISTEN AND LEARN.

Or w..watch.

Whatever.

I did realize that once again I am having no classes with anyone in particular I'd care to have classes with. Man does that "Suxur" or suck, in english.

I did discover the correct way to screw up a pot pie today. But I believe that's gonna be the extent of my intelligent uses this afternoon.

I STILL haven't begun work on the zombie script. I NEED TO DO THAT.

Also I need to work on the adaption of the remote control massacre skit into the one act play... You can read the skit I did last year in school around the first few days of May when I posted. It's around the 28th..or..Whenever I started.

Also Kazaa users are idiots.

Random Fast-Food Mascot

What's Your Personality Type?
brought to you by Quizilla

-MASTER SMURFY

Oh score. Hamster dance REMIX.

Smurfy — 2004-08-03T12:08:00-05:00

Dude, I so just found the full hamster dance REMIX.

On the WEB.

Be de ba de de do do....

Score.

Also I was alerted to the fact that I was woken up at 6:30 to go "Watch" my cousin up the street, only to be informed that IT WAS CANCELLED.

Oh screw that man.

Screw that.

Also.

OH SCREW ALSO

I HATE ALSO.

DIE DIE DIE DIE ALSO.

Gah.

Stupid word.

I also found out that playing TimeSplitters assault mode on one shot kill mode with One player versus like, 9 robots, that you are beyond screwed.

And by screwed I mean

HAHAHA. It's been 25 MINUTES and I cannot reach the WATERFALL. KILL ME PL..oh, thanks, you DID kill me.

Stupid robots.

Chassis bots suck.

IN NUMBERS.

(Smurfy lost track of his thoughts back at the hamsterdance)

Also noted is the 5 day remainder between me and school. Those 5 days are going to SUCK. They are going to suck that due to the fact that tommorow leaves 4 days, that measn the day after that leaves 3, et cetera, et cetera.

I talked to someone one time who said the word et cetera didn't exist. The whole word they said, was etc. HAHA. Idiot.

It's obviously...french or...italian or something.

Possibly portugese. AND BY PORTUGESE I MEAN SPANISH.

jeez.

I was reading through the paper yesterday, and they said john kerry's political ratings dropped 2% after the democratic convetion. I don't really see it, but being republican I'm an idiot anyway.

haha, silly smurfy, REPUBLICANS DON'T EXIST.

And how.

Oh dear. For some reason now I'm listening to Stevie wonder, what christmas means to me.

If only I was blind black and had cornrows. THEN I COULD JAM TO CHRISTMAS!

IN AUGUST!

Haha, you thought I'd say July.

We'll Screw ALL of you, It's AUGUST.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

As seen above, I'm out of things to ramble about. Jam to the bebop suckers.

1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.

2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me.

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.

5. Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside card) - Someone other than you.

6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!

7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me..
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

8. We've been friends for a very long time..
(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?

9. I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.

10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?

11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.

12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your birthday...
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.

13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, and West Virginia)

14. Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but wonder...
(Inside card) - What was I thinking?

15. Congratulations on your wedding day!...
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband!

-ULTRASMURFY

YZYZYZYZOOOOOWWW

Smurfy — 2004-08-03T10:08:00-05:00

Caffine should be illegal in UTAH.

NOT HERE.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

UTAH IS THE PLACE WHERE ILLEGAL CAFFINE SHOULD BE!
Not..in...MY STATE...

Backoff MY CAFFINE FOOLS.

ITZ MINE!

YES

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh MAN I'm so high on CAFFINE it's ILLEGAL.

MAN.
MAN,

MAN!

WORD TO YOUR MOTHER!

-Someone who is obvuously NOT YOU

To all my fans in smurfacadia

Smurfy — 2004-08-04T10:08:00-05:00

I have decided to quit mindsay.
I really just keep wasting my time on here, and it's taking up alot of time I'd like to dedicate to other activites. Like life, so as of today, I shall never return to the lair of mindsay. I sppologize to all my fans.

You fell for it didn't you. You know you did.

APRIL FOOLS!

"But SHMURFY, it's not APRIL LOLERZ, YYY DID U DO THATATATATATA"

Well, tough luck m'dears, thats what happens when you turn the calander to august. You might accidentily flip it to april.

Freshmen orientation tomorow. I have to go recruit them for drama club.

If another freshmen insults me, they die.

I only allowed that one because brooke slapped me rather hard. Twice. And I'm lying again, look at that.

Smurfy you dog.

Also i had a good heart to heart with michelle cohen about the dangers of my using caffine as a drug. Good to have friends like that, you know.

Good ol' Michelle.

And everyone else who ran AWAY from me on ym CAFFINE TRIP.

hahaha, thats fun to say.

You should all try it. It will liven yuor day.

So I was working today, right? And we pull up to this hangar. They don't have an elevator. And they ordered 8 boxes of 50 pound paper. and they have 3 flights of stairs.

Smurfy: Excuse me, where do you want this paper?
Guy-In-Monkey-Suit: LOL TOP FLOOR HUSSLE!
Smurfy flicks him off.

I carried 4 boxes.

Now that was quite a workout.

Carrying 50 pounds of paper up 3 flights of stairs.

I hate businesses.

Man was today hip

Smurfy — 2004-08-05T10:08:00-05:00

I have no time to talk of today, so as a result I will talk of today TOMMOROW. THEN TOMMOROW I WILL TALK ABOUT THE PRESENT WHICH WILL BE TOMMOROW. In

Man I hate caps.

I seriously do, I swear.

*Things of note, for tommorow:
-Michelle's otter
-Absence of people at open house
-FRESHMEN OF DOOM
-The stare of death
-The return of drama club drama
-Doomy's
-SON OF A DUCK THATS ALOT OF STUFF

Feel free to NEGLECT THE FOLLOWING

Brooke cannot keep a sunburn away.
Brittany often has no idea.

Equations.

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T05:08:00-05:00

Just add boxes!

Heres another one.

Once upon a time

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T06:08:00-05:00

There was a place called high school.

Hello High school! Smurfy yelled.
Hello smurfy. Good to meet you.
Where is it you live smurfy?

Asked the high school.

I live near shallowford! Smurfy announced happily.

But as the next year came around, smuryf said to the high school:

Hi old friend!

To which the school replied

Who the *#&#* Are YOU?

Yeah. Blasted school bus routes.

"We're sorry,b ut we have no record of you ever having lived where you say you do."
"Dude, my families been here for over two hundred FREAKING years"

"I'm sorry your just not in our records. Have a nice day."

Haha. OH SCREW YOU ALL WEST! SCREW YOU ALL!

BAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Man

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T08:08:00-05:00

I updhated the beggining and closing pictures of doom.

I even added a gay looking font to the bottom one. It just helpes to make the rest of the site blend in. I'm working on a COOL new background. One that doesn't SUCK.

haha, kidding, of course it will suck.

haha.

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T09:08:00-05:00

Yeah. That background SUCKS.

I'll get a better one that DOESNT suck soon.

As in,

it sucks less. BUT NO ABSENECSMENBSNE OF IT!

Also:

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T09:08:00-05:00

I am now beggining a NEW social experiment. This is social experiment three for those counting. Which will be hard to know because the first two were top secret disasters. No lie.

Results to be posted soon.

here's a hint of the social experiment.

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T10:08:00-05:00

rz: i found ur name on a search on a picture website
rz: for digital images
rz: pictures that r actually digital images is wut i mean
rz: lol
Sb: errrrrrr....oookayyy
rz: so wut state do u live in?
Sb: nc
rz: nc?
rz: i live in south dakota
rz: haha its def. not NORTH dakota!
rz: LOL
Sb: no.. it would be north carolina
rz: oooo
rz: then it really isnt north dakota!
rz: lol
Sb: yeah ha ha
Sb: how'd you get my screename again??

See. This is the AMAZING experiemtn where I just act stupid and get people to say stupid things.

it's a very stupid social experiment! BUT FUNNY.

FUN.

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T10:08:00-05:00

Man is this lame. No good'ns.

rz: hey ttherE!
HannahMk: hi whos this
rz: lol
rz: robert
HannahMk: robert who
rz: robert manguard
rz: and u?
rz: i found ur name on a journal
rz: online
rz: on the interweb
rz: i mean net
HannahMk: oh k
HannahMk: cool
HannahMk has blocked you at 10:38:22 PM.

One more time!

Smurfy — 2004-08-06T10:08:00-05:00

Now THIS guy was stupid.

rz: Hello there!
hugsRfun: whos this
rz: My name is Peter Julian Maguard, and I would like to know if you would participate in a quick survey
hugsRfun: oh sure i guess so
hugsRfun: well u see i only jackk off once a day
rz: Well that's not neccesarily the survey.
rz: Of course....Now let's begin.
rz: Have you/do you ever consume "Friedman's Green beans"
hugsRfun: well uhhhhhhh well i dont think so
rz: Okay, Have you ever consumed any Friedmans's food products at anytime?
rz: That you are aware of.
hugsRfun: i dont kno what fried mans is lol!
hugsRfun: well good bye now
hugsRfun signed off at 10:50:58 PM.

More stupid stuff

Smurfy — 2004-08-07T11:08:00-05:00

rz: Hello there!
STARSwithN: hello...
STARSwithN: whosthis
rz: Oh, Sorry
rz: My name's Robert Julian Manguard
rz: Or Robbie!
rz: haha!
rz: How are you?
STARSwithN: im good
rz: Haha, Alright!
rz: Would you like to take a quick survey?
rzr: I'm doing a consumer relations bit for Friedman's food company
STARSwithN: naw im good
STARSwithN: sry
rz: You sure?
rz: It's only a few questions.
STARSwithN: yup
STARSwithN: sry
rz: You'll recieve financial compensation.
rz: :-)!!!!
STARSwithN has blocked you at 10:31:35

man.

I tell you what this makes it alot easier to update.

Actual smurfy life info coming soon!

What do you call a watermelon in mid air?

Smurfy — 2004-08-08T09:08:00-05:00

A watermellon football.

Or maybe the thing THAT JUST EXPLODED ON YOUR NEW SHOES.

Blasted watermellon football.

I'm thinking about making smurfy's blog t-shirts.

Wouldn't that be groovy? It could have like, a picture of my amazing eating man avatar, with words such as

HE'S NOT STONED! BUT HE SURE IS STUPID!
Smurfy's BLOG

Or something like that.

Possibly not stupid.

But hey, you never know, you know?

I am gonna look deeper into t-shirts anyway.

Gonna be awesome.

ANNNNNNNYway.

Wow, I TOTALLY forgot what I was gonna say here, and I had alot. I guess I'm just off today. So tommorow begins another magnificently over-dramaticizised year of high school. Gonna be a sophomore this year, you see.

What I like best about being sophomore, is that you gain a little knotch in the IMNOTAFRESHMEN meter. Whew.

Boy do these freshmen suck. This year. Especially.

See, they get so naive. When I was a freshmen, I was fully EXPECTING high school to suck, you knbow, get blown up,whatever.

I did get thrown through a window, but I covered that newstory on the smurfopedia.

http://www.expage.com/smurfpedia

Curse that Kyle Rasmussen! and his last name!

Also I was alerted to the fact that some senior chick, Abby Hill, also asked Mr. Telford if she could do the morning announcements. Of course even though I had already asked, he agreed, so we split the days now.

Bah.

At least I get to do it. That still satisfy's my hunger for stupid jokes I can do over the P.A. System. Boy do I love my stupid jokes!

Oh my!

I must depart!

SINCERELY

Smurfy!

Another stupid one!

Smurfy — 2004-08-08T04:08:00-05:00

rz: Hey there!
foolishgirl1 returned at 11:57:57 PM.
foolishgirl1: Hey!
foolishgirl1: Whose this?
rz: My name is Robert Manguard
rz: or ROBBIE!
rz: hahaha.
rz: You know, like a "Nick Name"
rz: hahaha.
rz: What about you?
rz: Hello?
foolishgirl1: whoa, sorry
foolishgirl1: awesome, yeaaah I have a "Nick Name" too
foolishgirl1: Ali
rz: Ali!
rz: Awesome nickname.
rz: I would call you AL but that would be a Nick NICK name
rz: hahahaha!
rz: Ah, well
rz: Anyway
rz: I'm a PR guy for Friedman's vegetables
rz: Would you like to take a reeeealy quick survey?
foolishgirl1: sorry aim keeps signing me off, if youve noticed lol
foolishgirl1: for SHO!
foolishgirl1: hmm
foolishgirl1: waiiiit. did you get my s/n from mindsay?
rz: Probably something like that.
rz: I have a screen name sweeper
rz: It goes over blog's and like, say, picture websites.
rz: But it seems as if I have been alerted to a delay
rz: I shall contact you Later!
rz: hahaha
foolishgirl1: oh, fun.
rz: Later al!
foolishgirl1: lol cya robbie

Dude.

Smurfy — 2004-08-08T04:08:00-05:00

NEW flavor of mountain dew.

And it is HOTT.

BAJA RUSH

Chat logs

Smurfy — 2004-08-08T09:08:00-05:00

freedomhowler has left the room.
freedomhowler has entered the room.
Electron Pink: well
Electron Pink: i have furious george shirts!
Electron Pink: and no one has heard of them
Raining SkyFire: dude
Electron Pink: so in your face
Raining SkyFire: what teh WHA
BonziBuddyX: Furious Geroge!
BonziBuddyX: The RAGE-FILLED LITTLE MONKEY.
Raining SkyFire: HAHAHAHA
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: !!
Electron Pink: no
Electron Pink: idiot

Holy SNAP did today SUCK.

Smurfy — 2004-08-09T05:08:00-05:00

"YOU CAN CUSS ALL YOU WANT AS LONG AS YOU CAN SPELL IT" My bus driver said.

Immedietelly there was a cry from this freshmen.

"HAHAHAHA REALLY?"

"Dude!!!!! MANNN!!!! I saw a guy who looked like FIFTY CENT who had on a FIFTY CENT t-shirt!!!!!! it said G-Unit on the back!!!!"

Actual freshmen quote.

Now, I'm pretty laid back about social situations. I don't general like to be a ripple in a roraring pond, but today, man.

Today.

Today just SUCKED.

I find out I don't ride 660 like everyone else I rode with last year.

I now ride 603.

It comes complete with 75% underclassmen.

::sigh::

I'm going to miss Susan and the bus last year.

This means April doesn't ride my bus, none of thsoe cool chicks, none of those far out guys.

Nothing.

What a sucky day.

I waited for my bus outside my house for 2.5 hours before I realized it just wasn't coming.

After I found my bus, after so much problems, the driver simply said

"I was tryin' to finish real quick you know"

Stupid evil ghetto bus driver.

And then SPANISH

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh I am so screwed.

What a lousy day.

See, this isn't "emo"

This is just whiny.

If I was being emo I'd say "sux" or "killz me" alot.

OR MAKE MY BACKGROUND FILLED WITH POSTERS OF CHICKENS.

I wondered why people hated freshmen so much.

And today the reason came up to me, slapped me in the face, bruised my legs, and said "ROFLOLMAO"

I have included a picture taken recently of freshmen at my school. Note the obvious lack of intelligent brain cells.

.........

So today, the title of life is

Freshmen Suck

Also, Here's an angsty song that reminds me of alot of relationships I'm in the middle of

You're better off without him
Don't call him
He's breaking your heart.

He's hanging with your best friend
And you're waiting there
It's tearing you apart.

He lied to you a thousand times,
When I was there he kept you waiting.

And I'm still here waiting there
To catch you if you fall.
I don't know why I care so much
When I shouldn't care at all.

Finally got the nerve to tell you
How much you mean to me
You said that I was your best friend,
A real sweet guy
But that's all I'd ever be.

I don't know why I care so much
When you don't care at all!

"Sing a simple song full video"

Smurfy — 2004-08-09T08:08:00-05:00

"Hidy hey! Hidy ho! Sing a simple song.... When they played it on the radio, everyone sang along! Hamster dancing in the street! They had it going ON! From paris to hollywood! from new york to hong kong! Everybody everywhere! Singing a simple song!

It's HAMTASTICALLY groovy!"

They said hamtastical and groovy in one sentence.

God bless those dancing hamsters, I tell you what.

Let's make fun of blogs now.

Smurfy — 2004-08-09T09:08:00-05:00

Here are some excerpts from blogs I've discovered on my journey's.

REJOICE IN TAKING THINGS OUT OF CONTEXT!

"
1. MY NAME IS TULIP PANSY
What kind of parents would name their child Tulip Pansy? The kind that are mine, i guess.

2. I AM A COMPULSIVE LIAR

3. MY HAIR IS THE COLOR OF PUKE GREEN
My mother has assured me that it's because of the chlorine
in the school pool. But i have a different theory. I think God is punishing me.

4. MY BUTT IS THE SIZE OF WISCONSIN"

"Anyway, I have to tell you that my ants are smart. Last night I went and laid down for a few minutes, which turned into 7 hours. Anyway when I had got up this morning I realized that I had left an empty glass sitting by my computer desk. The glass had once had sweet tea in it so it was swarming with ants. I picked it up and looked at it in disguist and then slammed it back down and cussed out the ants. Well wouldn't you know that they all came trooping out of the glass, down the side, and have disappeared to who the heck knows where. There is once again not a sign of an ant anywhere and my glass is free of them. I thought that was rather strange, but then again I guess I have neve cussed out ants before either. Maybe they understood, but I kind of doubt it. So not like anyone has probably ever studied the behavior of ants before, but is this normal for them to do something like that? Maybe they knew if they didn't leave I would kill them all, not like that isn't my overall intention anyhow, but still."

"August 5th, 2004.

whos hungry?!

6:24pm - i just got off the phone with like one of my best friends she moved to georgia but it was kewl to talk to her and stuff!! i want to runnaway and stay with her and her family any one want to come with me.... i've got donuts lol!!"

Hahaha.a.a...a....

I HATE MY LIFE BUT I HAVE DONUTS LOL REJOICE I AM HAPPIE.

Moving on.

(This is fun fun FUN!)

"August 8th, 2004.

Theres underpants in mah pants?!?

my stupids for the week...okay..i was swimming laps at the hotel and my hand hit the wall then my head hit the wall and i have a big ole scrape ontop of my head..i tripped once when there was a bunch of people around..i studdered alot when i tried to say this one word(dont remember what it was) and some lady had to say it for me..i think that was it..

i am at kates and i havent seen her in forever so it was great. i missed my friends and talking to all you people that are kind enough to read my blog. thank you.

randomness..me and kate are gonna have ear hair when we are old men!!

post a comment? in mah pants!"

He actually said, Post a comment in mah pants.

Dude.

I can't make this stuff up folks, I just CAN'T.

Who IS David Lynch?

Smurfy — 2004-08-10T06:08:00-05:00

"Yeah..I'm jason..and I brought this..booklet...because it proves that if if David Lynch does anything I'll buy it...."

"Who did you say?"

"David Lynch"

"You mean eraserhead?"

"No..I mean..David Lynch."

"Oh...uh..I don't think I know who he is...Next?"

XD

You could SMELL user TelevisionMan getting angry at the mention of no one else actually liking David Lynch.

And also, it was show and tell.

WHA TEH WOOOAHT?

Anyway.

My bus actually picked me up today, that was cool, and "ALAN THE HICK" Yelled at the freshmen while the Junior, Seth Christian farted on some freshmen who wandered into the back of the bus.

Idiot freshmen.

Also my fat idiot Jon managed to further make me wonder why I have to be related to idiots like Jon. Who are also fat idiots.

Also theater is hip.

Smurfy:"Maybe they are like, Triplets...or..something"

Class:"HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!"

Smurfy:"Why was that funny?"

Everyone:"We don't really know"

Also The operative known as Kat is going to help produce the smurfy's blog tshirts!

Also, I noticed my 4000 mark is about to be tripped. Scoreeeeeee.

Leave me a post if you notice your close to the 4000th hit.

w00000t!
__________________________________
It's that time again! Time to find random blog excerpts and enjoy TAKING THINGS OUT OF CONTEXT!

"August 1st, 2004.

1:16pm - Yesterday a very smart friend of mine told me words that meant alot to me. He told me not to worry about everything and to be happy in the time i'm here. Granted he only said this because we almost got hit by a huge bus, but it's true. I'm spinning the black circle."

Hahaha. Those crazy buses! Always hitting those CRRRAZY kids!

"August 2nd, 2004.

Hallo

11:02pm - Hey people. I stayed home today and cancelled with Arlise, =( oh well, next time. The good news was that I baked some uber awesome blueberry muffins! They are only 90 calories, (cause Stephy is on a diet and all) and then for dinner me and my aunt made popovers but they came out too eggy and ish, ick. =[ I guess it's cool.

It was soo hot today. i went out to help my aunt in the gardne and ugh...i think summer decided it wanted to come back with humidity...blah...I ate an early dinner at like 5 and then at 6 i went up to my room read a lil and then passed out for two hours! Wow, I was le tired. Now I am up waiting for my Snugglebear to habla with me. I miss my Mooshi!!!!!!"

o.o

Oh

Snap.
Snap.

SNAP.

One more.

"August 4th, 2004.

So bored

8:44pm - Werewolves are teh best... (us intelligent ones call them "lycans") but ive been wondering. whow oudl win, spiderman, or a vampire."

When haven't we asked ourselves the SAME question! it is one of the eternal's. Like DID THE CHICKEN MUTATE OR DID THE EGG FALL INTO TOXIC WASTE?

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz.

Carry on, soldiers of DOOOOOOM

-Smurfy

SHARK!

Smurfy — 2004-08-11T08:08:00-05:00

It's time for another one of my corny jokes.

"L.O.L."

There is this atheist swimming in the ocean. All of a sudden he sees a shark in the water, so he starts to swim furiously towards his boat. As he looks back, he sees the shark turn and head straight towards him. He's scared to death, and as he see's the jaws of the great white beast open, revealing it's horrific teeth, the atheist screams, "OH GOD! SAVE ME!" In an instant, time is frozen and a bright light shines down from above. The man is motionless in the water when he hears the voice of God say, "You are an Atheist. Why do you call upon me when you do not believe in me?"

Confused, and knowing he can't lie, the man replies, "Well, that's true, I don't believe in you, but how about the shark? Can you make the shark believe in you?"

The Lord replies, "As you wish," and the light retarcts back into the heavens. The man feels the water being to move once again. As the atheist looks back, he can see the jaws of the shark start to close down on him, when all the sudden the shark stops and pulls back. Shocked, the man watches as the huge beast closes its eyes, bows it's head and says,

"Thank you Lord, for this food for which I am about to recieve..."

Hahaha. JUST KIDDING. NOTHING HAPPENED.

Smurfy — 2004-08-12T09:08:00-05:00

And so my caps attack once again.

Events of note that occured today-

>I remembered I suck at english

>I suck at english

> I NEED a new seat in theater arts...

>I got to hang out with brittany for 4 or 5 minutes. Thats 6 or 7 more then usual.

>I'm still single.

>I'm STILL freaking single.

>I know WHY

>I suck at English

>My civics classmates are idiots. And also preppy.

Example A.

Morgan Lovelace, the only girl at West who cares if her eyebrows are not styled properly.

I hate styled eyebrows.

> SOme other stuff

>I suck at english.

Also noted was that I now have the ability to speak the spanish alphabet with accuracy unmatched by anyone as stupid.

Smurfy's Blog T-shirts are coming QUICKLY my dear retarded freinds!! HAHAHAHAHA.

Whatever.

The darkened light haunts the evening sunrise.

33 pushups in 60 seconds!

SMURFY IS A MIGHTY NERD BEAST.

The strongest nerd this side of My house, SUCKAH.

w00tations.

And KAT did TWENTY crrrrrrrAZY pushups.

You havent seen pushups until someone does them in converses.

And Kat sure did, fool.

AS soon as she provides that link she shall become groovier....

The one and only.

Smurfy.

-.-...

Smurfy — 2004-08-12T10:08:00-05:00

Sometimes, you just have to realize that we wear alot of masks.

As do I.

The day the Day became a day that had a day like no other day.

Smurfy — 2004-08-13T04:08:00-05:00

HAHAHAHA.

YESSSS.

Also some hott freshmen chicks ride my bus man.

Hot FRESHMEN chicks.

w00tations.

Everyones a hottie when you live in smurfavitaville.

It's like Jimmy Buffett except not.

AND BY NOT I MEAN I'VE HAD A HIT SINCE 1983.

I've looked into the smurfy's blog t-shirts, and I'm seeing potential here folks. Really am.

Also my autobiography:

THE BETTER THEN BILL CLINTON BOOK

Coming most likely in 9-10 years/months/never.

(Fill in later)

(lazy)

Also my comment numbers died down.

What the smurf man!

WHAT THE SMURF!

It's not like I'm DICTATING you all to be DICTATED into DICTATION.

Oh snap.

Cici's pizza.

ILL BE BACK TONIGHT FOLKS

THE DOOM BEGAN ON FRIDAY THE 13TH

Smurfy — 2004-08-13T11:08:00-05:00

And it KEPT On until friday the FOURTEENTH.

HAHAHA!

I have so many way far out idea on t-shirts.

We need to have some voteage on which ones would be grooviest.

We have

1. Smurfy picture giving thumbs up saying: I SURVIVED SMURFY'S BLOG! MY MIND DID NOT!

2. WALMART KILLZ U. SMURFY DOESN'T.

3. A thong that reads: SMURFY WAS HERE

(I like number 3)

4. t-shuirt with a huge >D on the front and SMURFYS BLOG ROXORZ on the back.

So what do you think fools?

The jacuzzi of death

Smurfy — 2004-08-13T11:08:00-05:00

You have a phone call.

Your mission: Move hotub from point A (old guys house) to Point B (not old guy's house)

Problems:
>Hot tub weighs 762 pounds.

>Two bungee cords.

>6 foot truck bed, 8 foot hot tub.

End result:

Pain, misery, broken hot tub, broekn truck, broken back.

Final solution:

Give old guy a mean look.

__________________________

Blah blah blah blah.

Jarrod Bailey got beat up by some freshies today.

Rarr.

I opened up my online store, and I'm adding things now.

Only thing is, once I start selling stuff,

I got to apply for taxes.

I'm not sure I want to do that right now.

But who knows....

Aye.

NOTHING HAPPNEDED, GAAH

TYPO!

SHOO!

GO AWAY NOW!

COMICSSSSS

Smurfy — 2004-08-14T12:08:00-05:00

But the funniest one of all may just be Get fuzzy...

Smurfy's Family Reunion

Smurfy — 2004-08-14T09:08:00-05:00

Man.

My family knows how to reunite.

Let me tell you.

We had my grandma's macoronii, and her chiken and dumplin's, and my aunt elains strawberry shortcake, and uncle carl and aunt francis'...uh....Soda...

My family is the colest bunch of rednecks in the world.

But see, you could be confused by that

There are Hicks, Bad rednecks, and good rednecks.

Hicks are just idiots who live in nowhere.

bad rednecks are the rednecks who live in doublewide trailers, eat dog meat, and have 5-19 children.

Good rednecks, are farmers, who are generally intelligent but lack the means to bverbally express it.

Good rednecks roxor.

'Cause they can cook.

We played banjo music, did some pool, foosball, played with some of my 3rd and 2nd cousins, all that jazz.

And do we know how to freaking COOK.

aw MAN.

Alex Melda and DJ from school apparently were arrested earlier today for smoking pot. Some of you I actually know might know those guys.

I find it funny, because DJ is a jerk.

Big jerk.

With STUPID hair.

I have another really corny joke to tell soon.

It's a GOOD one.

Better then my OTHER bad lame corny dumb jokes that somehow are still funny.

Comma.

My Blog T-shirt fantasies are soon to come to fruition my friends/mortal enemies/random internet hobo's.

Everyone who I don't think is an idiot gets a free Smurfy doesn't think your an idiot ballcap.

Or maybe a dollar off.

I might even offer smurfy's blog trucker hats.

Everyone likes trucker hats.

Except me.

But hey, this blog isn't about SMURFY, it's about say,

George Washington Carver.

Or,

Benjamin the blue eyes Gopher.

What pointless and dull and has later at the end?

Later.

-Smurfy

BAD MIDI FILES MUSIC

Smurfy — 2004-08-14T11:08:00-05:00

I now have BAD MIDI MUSIC on my BEE LAWG

It'll die soon, don't worry.

I just like that song.

^_^

if it's annoying tell me and I'll kill it.

IDIOTS!

Smurfy — 2004-08-15T03:08:00-05:00

So I went to K & W today.

K & W as in RACIST DOOM.

For example;

Friday afternoon my history teacher asked:

What race of people most often immigrates to america?

"MEXICANS!" Cam the response from the back row.

"Right" Said my AFRICAN/AMERICAN PSUEDO EUROPEAN 1/6TH IRISH CIVICS AND ECONOMICS TEACHER.

And then we got into an hour long discussion of why we should call hispanic people mexicans which turned into some stupid race thing we've talked about in every class, ever.

Which leads me to my opinion, which we have all grown to know and love.

"I'm puerto-rican. Not Mexican. It's offensive to call me Mexican" One PUERTO RICAN MEXICAN said.

But now. I want you to scroll up and look at my picture.

Do I look white to you?
HAHAHA IM NOT YOU RACIST.

That's how the class ended up.

But now, let's get technical.

I'm Irish, scottish, german, cherokee indian, sioux indian, english, and some other crazy stuff.

I'm mostly scottish.

Do I ge toffended if some guy call's me a white guy?

Do I get offended when someone calls me a "A FOO' DUM CRACKAH!"

Not really.

This is why I label this column, IDIOTS.

Who in the heck CARES if you're part german/irish.

If you look hispanic rednecks like me call you a mexican.

Is it dergoatory?

No.

Then why does it matter?

Because historically, people are stupid.

Blah blah blah blah blah.

Who Cares.

Now, if I wanted your family history, I would ask.

I would ask

"LOL WHATS YOUR FAMILY HISTORY BEFORE I CALL YOU MEXICAN"

Sure calling some white guy a mexican would be stupid.

Sure calling someone who was wearing a thsirt that said

I AM PUERTO RICAN a mexican would piss them off.

But dude.

Why the heck would I care to know that?

Why would you CARE to know that I'm scottish.

And this brought up the point of American culture.

There IS NO American culture.

American culture, is a whole bunch of everybody stewed into one big pot and left on boil for 2 weeks.

NOBODY in other countries says:

Oh MAN look I dress liek an AMERICAN.

WHA?!?!?!

We don't dress or act like ANYTHING.

Theres so much bloody diversity that any resemblence to any culture we migth ahve had died out centuries ago.

The only American culture we have are NATIVE AMERICANS.

I'm a NATIVE AMERICAN.

I can't say INDIAN because thats POLITICALLY INCORRECT.

You know what?

Being politically correct is going to kill ALL of you.

This has been a message brought to you by

REDNECK CORP. OF AMERICA.

Man.

I'm SO going to get flamed for this.

FLAME ME YOU FOOLS! BUUUURN AWAYYYY.

Moving on,

I made contact with a freshmen at west today about "Cell Phones"

She was hott.

Stupid hott freshmen.

Why do they have to be FRESHMEN.

Everyone knows they kill CATS.

Also, what in the name of smurf is with these guys and their crazy personalities?

So I'm in a chat room last night, with these PEOPLE

And all the sudden everyones like

OH SNAP WE'RE ANTISMURFY NOW.

Wha?!?!?!

You can all have your smurfy's blog t-shirts at FIVE TIMES the normal price for a nonexistent SMURFYS BLOG T-SHIRT.

No one likes an ANTI-SMURFY-NIST

And remember kids, if you download music, you're downloading communism.

~_^

-Smurfy and his mind of death.

It's been a long time coming.

Smurfy — 2004-08-15T05:08:00-05:00

Been a long time, my good friend and worst enemy.

Looks like my mind just corrupted itself again.

Blasted depression.

And then it goes away and then you eat some soup..

A year ago this week

Smurfy — 2004-08-16T07:08:00-05:00

That's right.

A year ago this week the worst attack on US soil to ever occur happened right here, in the states.

Do you remember where you were?

Where your family was?

When Gigli came into our theaters?

Oh I shudder at the thought,

We all know someone who was infected.

Let's have a moment to remember the fallen of our own.

Woo BOY

Smurfy — 2004-08-16T05:08:00-05:00

Check out this angry response guys! It made me go "Lol"

"
-Smurfy and his mind of death.
Their reply was:
Subject: You are a f------ idiot
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm far from PC, I normally applaud the lack of political correctness, but you are just stupid. Not one comment you made had any sort of coherance or hindthought. Some people are just too stupid to live...congratulations!...you are one of them! Try thinking before you type, dumbass!"

HAR HAR HAR

METAL FOOL OF DOOM!

Now, my primary suspects are narrows down BECAUSE I HAVE THE FREAKING ISP NUMBER.

IDIOT!

Now, Mr. /Mrs. 69.200.164.95

I bet you didn't know that even though you posted your ANNONYMOUS COMMENT on my BEE LAWG

I can TRACK your freaking NUMBER.

IDIOT!

Time for the JUICE

Smurfy — 2004-08-16T06:08:00-05:00

How random are you?

this quiz was made by alanna

haha!

WHODA GUESSED!

Anyway.

I'd love it if my annonymous poster left another remark.

I'd be very happy if you did, my annonyomous poster.

I'll kill your and your 2nd cousin yet.

ANYWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

DUDE.

I cannot STAND but to laugh at these guys.

Also, I'm DEFINETELLY going to do this the next time I go to the beach.

I'm saving watermelons RIGHT NOW

So anyway. SHUTUP.

Smurfy — 2004-08-16T07:08:00-05:00

Okay, onto the actual SMURFY NEWS OF THE DAY!

W00tations.

Man.

Today, on the bus,

I was sitting there,

and like,

nothing happened.

So after that, I like, went to class, like, like like, like, and like, then after that, like

nothing happened

BUT THATS UNFAIR TO ANIMALS!

That's EXACTLY why I'm here to piss you PETA people off today.

Boy smurfy, they might say,

You really are on a roll with this stuff lately!

Too which I would reply.

Freakin' right I am.

Which is exactly why I'mnot attacking PETA today.

The metric system, however, is open season.

You know what

SCREW THE METRIC SYSTEM.

So what if EUROPE can't figure out how much an inch is.

SCREW EURUPE AND THEIR STUPID MEASUREMENTS.

Also ASIA CAN ALSO LEARN THEIR STUPID METRIC SYSTEM.

But personally

I freakin' hate the metric system.

Of course,

the metric system is only here in order to make life easier. Now thats what they SAY. But it's NOT.

Especially when you PROPOTIONALIZE METRIC aha.ah..blah blah...

I felt extremely dumb whent he freshmen were like

OH LOL I GET IT

And I was like...

Dude.

O.o
WHA?!?!?!

That sort of thing.

I just sort of stopped lsitening after that and looked out the window and pretended I was outside at my field laying out doing nothing.

Then Erin hit me with a binder called me an idiot and I was reminded that I was currently doing something:

Existing

Then I realized quickly that existence was a thought in the mind and that I had no mind then so I just sort of jabbed erin and continued not paying attention.

Poor erin.

She's going to kill me.

But besides that.

I realized English II Honors is a sucky class.

That Civics and economics was a sucky class.

That geometry is a sucky class.

And that if I keep on making stupid not funny jokes in mrs hubbards theater class shes going to MUTATE me into a CYBERNETIC ORGANISM capable of MASS FIRE ..a.s..STARTING.

But really.

I've been wondering something.

Where in the name of my sideburns is my freaking digital camera so I can make a NEW layout?

A year ago..this...wekk

Smurfy — 2004-08-16T07:08:00-05:00

Christin Stewart. My relative who isn't related.

Smurfy — 2004-08-16T09:08:00-05:00

Raining SkyFire: Hahaha.
Raining SkyFire: Christin.
casbaby12: hello
Raining SkyFire: How was the pictures there..for...uh..
Raining SkyFire: Field hockey!
Raining SkyFire: haha.
Raining SkyFire: yes.
casbaby12: lovely
casbaby12: we all wore our hair crazy
casbaby12: like on the top of our heads
Raining SkyFire: Oh SNAP.
Raining SkyFire: Thats INSANE
Raining SkyFire: INSANE I SAY
Raining SkyFire: Who would have thought.
casbaby12: meanwhile.. the cheerleaders brought their hair straighteners
Raining SkyFire: On TOP of your HEADS!
Raining SkyFire: Cheerleaders are crazed beasts.
Raining SkyFire: Threatening our sanity
Raining SkyFire: By use of their HAIR PRODUCTS
Raining SkyFire: and CLEAVAGE.

And By cleavage I obviously mean MISTER TELFORD.
casbaby12: hahahahahahaha
Raining SkyFire: Stupid hair products.
Raining SkyFire: No one really minds the cleavage but mr. telford
Raining SkyFire: but those blasted HAIR products.
Raining SkyFire: EUGH.
casbaby12: hahahahaha
Raining SkyFire: But..ah..
Raining SkyFire: Did you have practice too?
Raining SkyFire: Or just pictures
casbaby12: yea practice
Raining SkyFire: Groovy!
Raining SkyFire: Did you whck anyone with you're far out field hockey stick today?
casbaby12: nah lol
Raining SkyFire: Well
Raining SkyFire: Hmm...
Raining SkyFire: Maybe you should have *ACCIDENTILY* like
Raining SkyFire: Hit one of the cheerleaders
Raining SkyFire: YOU WOULD HAVE BRUISED THEM
Raining SkyFire: They would have shrivled up into NOTHING
Raining SkyFire: But HAIR PRODUCTS
casbaby12: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Raining SkyFire: and maybe CLEAVAGE
Raining SkyFire: Like a shriveled pile of HAIR
Raining SkyFire: and CLEAVAGE
Raining SkyFire: Then we'd have mr. telford all pissed off
Raining SkyFire: NO HAIR PRODUCTS WITH CLEAVAGE
Raining SkyFire: Studendenntas...s..students..
casbaby12: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaha
Raining SkyFire: You know I saw Mr. Telford at the movie theater once
Raining SkyFire: he was watching Garfield.
Raining SkyFire: Becuase as ashamed to say it I am, I actually saw garfield
Raining SkyFire: and the only ones in the theater was me mr. telford some balck guy and mr telfords wife
casbaby12: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Raining SkyFire: And I felt very uncomfortable knowing someone knew I actually watched garfield
casbaby12: lmao
Raining SkyFire: But then i was like
Raining SkyFire: holy crap
Raining SkyFire: mr TELFORD watches...GARFIELD..
Raining SkyFire: I'm sure he was mad at it
Raining SkyFire: because liz had some CRAZY lookin' shirt on one time
Raining SkyFire: cleavage indeed
Raining SkyFire: I figured he'd stand up and be like
Raining SkyFire: CUT THIS OFF
Raining SkyFire: THERES CLEAVAGE THERE
casbaby12: LMFAO
Raining SkyFire: You'll notice my whole purpose of making you laugh so hard is just so I can make fun of mr. telford while saying cleavage at the same time
casbaby12: hahahahahaha
Raining SkyFire: But I had fun doing it.
Raining SkyFire: I'm putting this conversation on my blog now.
Raining SkyFire: it deserves it.
casbaby12: hahahahaha k i'll read it later

A good reason to keep Christin around is that she laughs at my stupid jokes.

I like people who like my stupid jokes! ^_^

WHAT THE SMURF

Smurfy — 2004-08-17T05:08:00-05:00

I think my eyesight is failing again.

I'm going to need stronger contacts before long.

It's all you peoples fault.

YOU AND YOUR BEE-LAWGS.

Here's a quote by non other then Morgan Lovelace;

"So..if it's like..salad..then it's all together..and the same..but all seperate sort of and different but..I..I don't KNOW!"

Morgan Lovelace, I despise your idiocy.

Blondes would be better if they had common sense.

Or,

Wait,

Nevermind.

Theyt wouldn't

I also noted today, that Zach's (Man, you DUMB) sister enjoys hearing me laugh. So I did this cool new laugh.

It's like a combo of my Huuu huuu huuuuuh laugh and my crazy HEHEHEHEHEHE laugh.

It's just SEXY.

Also noted was that a certain dear young woman by the name of Kate Matthews has begun a reign of terror at my drama club table that may never cease to destroy our minds AND hearts.

Oh we are all so dead.

SO DEAD.

I also managed to increase my flirtation output by 17% today, due to some upperclass chick encounters of the best kind.

Hot diggity.

SEVENTEEN PERCENT.

THATS INSANE

You might say

To which smurfy may reply,

Hahahaha! look! It's sarcasm! AND ALSO DOUGHNUTS.

I learned that my former in-car and drivers ed teacher, Mr, Elliott's fiancê was killed in a car crash.

Isn't that ironic?

Irony is a bitter symphony in life.

So is the fact that today's entry is so short when I have so so so much time.

Aw,

Smurfy — 2004-08-18T05:08:00-05:00

Just a warning, I may not have a big update today.

I'll try to get around to it,

But I have to walk this stupid goat my dear Mother purchased.

I don't like goats.

I don't like a goat named "SOCKS" even more.

PREPARE FOR RANT ON AISLE 18!

-Smurfy the forewarner.

IDIOTS.

Smurfy — 2004-08-18T06:08:00-05:00

Now we have TWO annonymous idiots to kill.

Listen here 192.168.100.229,

I'm going to eat you ALIVE.

And spit out your STUPID html encrusted COMMENTS

Operation Goat Doom

Smurfy — 2004-08-18T10:08:00-05:00

So it goes down like this.

Yesterday, a box arrives with man driving a large pickup truck.

"That..uh..goat you bought is here.." He says.

"Um...right..You need to bring it down the hill here and put it in that old fenced in area"

"er...right.."

The man pulls out a small white pygmy goat.

Innocent looking enough.

But then it makes a sound.

a DEMONIC sound.

A sound that een NOW recoils throuhg my mind.

It bleats.

And bleats.

And BLEATS

It's right outside my bedroom window.

And it DOESN'T shutup.

So what's the solution to one goat?

Well, this goat,

My dear mother named "SOCKS"

"SOCKS" is lonely.

So we got ANOTHER goat.

Goat 2= NAMELESS BEAST

Goat 2 is on order for tommorow.

Express goat.

But see,

We don't want "SOCKS" to get fat.

So My mother insturcts me,

"WALK THE GOAT YOU FOOL! FOR YOU ARE ADOPTED!"

I'm walking a goat.

I realize, quickly.

I'm walking a goat.

Why am I cursed to live my life, I ponder

_____________________________

BUS ENCOUNTERS OF THE 42nd KIND!

Jarrod continued his onslaught of bad verbal attacks on pretty much everyone, and threw the following items out of the bus window, claiming it was cool.

1) 2 sheets of paper

2) Pudding cup

3) Something else

4) Spit into a large paper ball and thre it at Freshmen.

Now, after these things which Jarrod did, several "Freshmen" became angry and did something that will remain in my memory forever.

Said "Andrew" went to the front of the bus.

Jarrod got off and said; "GOODBYE YOU (Insert 6 random cuss words here)

So when jarrod walked by the kids window, the freshmen spit the biggest....eugh..

Nailed him.

mannnnn was that fun.

Jarrod tried to get back on the bus and asked the driver

"Can I have permission tog et on the bus and kick his ass?"

The bus driver said:

"GET THE BLAZES OFF MY BUS FOOL"

I love my bus driver.

Sure, spitting the biggest.a...eugh..

Sure that sounds incredibly imamture, foolish, and downright stupid.

But if you knew the back story behind it,

You would have yelled in glee as loud as I did.

Man.

I don't have much ways of ending this terribly entry unawkwardly now anyway.

So I might as well say some trite and terrible thing like

LATER FOOLS!

-The one and only,
Smurfy.

Why do we have to keep saying FRAN DRESCHER.

Smurfy — 2004-08-19T06:08:00-05:00

I HATE Fran drescher.

Goat # 2 arrived via GoatLand Express today.

That's two goats now.

Three goats too many.

My board meeting is tommorow, which will be about the first time I've seen any of the drama groovin's since..open house.

Brooke, Brittany, Amy, Lucy...and..uh..oh wait, carrie.

Then smurfy.

Of course when brittany comes she might just drag around DAVID because they are getting awful clingy lately.

I HATE people who cling.

I'm such a pissy little fellow you know.

Also, I had a very intresting conversation with "Kristen"

Raining SkyFire: Oink oink OINK
SpottedPinkDuck: Moo moo MOO
Raining SkyFire: Carlos keep on BLABBING
SpottedPinkDuck: HA HA HA
Raining SkyFire: and everytime we ask a question,
Raining SkyFire: my mind
SpottedPinkDuck: lol
Raining SkyFire: it just keeps dragging..
SpottedPinkDuck: ha ha ha ha ha
SpottedPinkDuck: thats funny.
SpottedPinkDuck: very sorry.
Raining SkyFire: I made a nice poem out of it
SpottedPinkDuck: may i read lol
Raining SkyFire: that was the bad poem right there dear.
SpottedPinkDuck: oh
SpottedPinkDuck: lol
Raining SkyFire: ~_^
SpottedPinkDuck: teehee
Raining SkyFire: ANYWAY
Raining SkyFire: How are you grooving around these days bonzai?
SpottedPinkDuck: ehh slowly
SpottedPinkDuck: lol
SpottedPinkDuck: im groovin very slowly
SpottedPinkDuck: u?
Raining SkyFire: I'm..
Raining SkyFire: Just partially groovy
Raining SkyFire: you coming to the football game tommoroee?
SpottedPinkDuck: Yup
SpottedPinkDuck: rich is takin me
SpottedPinkDuck:
Raining SkyFire: ~_~
Raining SkyFire: Freaking boyfriend.
SpottedPinkDuck: lol whats wrong w/ my 'freaking boyfriend' ?
Raining SkyFire: I'm anti-boyfriend.
Raining SkyFire: All around.
Raining SkyFire: Because, Kristen,
Raining SkyFire: I have a very flirtatious nature
Raining SkyFire: and of course,
Raining SkyFire: when theres that boyfriend anti-flirtation wall
Raining SkyFire: I am BRICKED
SpottedPinkDuck: lol well you arent flirtatious w/ me even when i didnt have one. lol
SpottedPinkDuck: and im very flirtatious too... and im bricked also lmao
Raining SkyFire: Dude.
Raining SkyFire: PSH
SpottedPinkDuck: ?
Raining SkyFire: I am beyond any level of flirtation you could imagine
Raining SkyFire: I think thats probably one of the reasons I'm always single.
Raining SkyFire: You know,
Raining SkyFire: for the last 15 years.
SpottedPinkDuck: youve NEVER had a girlfriend???
Raining SkyFire: mmm
Raining SkyFire: Yeah.
Raining SkyFire: That's about it.
SpottedPinkDuck: dang. i would think you would
Raining SkyFire: Yeah.
Raining SkyFire: I would too.
SpottedPinkDuck: you DO have a ton of girls as friends
Raining SkyFire: FRIENDGIRLS OMG .
SpottedPinkDuck: and uhh you DO flirt... a lot!
Raining SkyFire: Yeah.
SpottedPinkDuck: well yeah. but like... someone w/ your flirtatious nature would usually snatch up one that isnt uhh well... abnormally looking lol
Raining SkyFire: I don't know.
Raining SkyFire: I mean
Raining SkyFire: I'm certainly not gay.
SpottedPinkDuck: i know i know.
Raining SkyFire: I'm 107% sure of that
SpottedPinkDuck: ha. thats good.
Raining SkyFire: ::nods::
SpottedPinkDuck: you dont seem like a gay guy.
Raining SkyFire: Yeah.
Raining SkyFire: being all, straight and all.
SpottedPinkDuck: yup lol
SpottedPinkDuck: well usually gay guys flirt w/, GUYS
SpottedPinkDuck:
Raining SkyFire: Oh YEAH.
Raining SkyFire: Point!
Raining SkyFire: But, it doesn't nullify the fact that even the ugly stupid guys have 5 or 18 girlfriends a year.
SpottedPinkDuck: well paying a girlfriend doesnt count
SpottedPinkDuck: lol
Raining SkyFire: Shoot.
Raining SkyFire: I've tried that,
Raining SkyFire: I should have known
SpottedPinkDuck: im really shockedu dont have one though. cuz well girls LIKE humor right???
SpottedPinkDuck: ha. lol
Raining SkyFire: I guess.
Raining SkyFire: Maybe they don't like guys who are so obnoxious and wear clothes that don't have ABERCROMBIES SLAVE written on them
SpottedPinkDuck: ha! well i hate that.
Raining SkyFire: But you never know!
SpottedPinkDuck: well unless your wearing ABERCROMBIE then you arent gunna get the really really hot popular girls
SpottedPinkDuck: mmeee 2!
SpottedPinkDuck: ha.
SpottedPinkDuck: yeah. and they are just freakin stuck up and ANNOYING
SpottedPinkDuck: brb smurfy
SpottedPinkDuck is away at 6:46:00 PM.

Which made me once again come to the conclusion that I'm single.

Still.

Blast it.

Jaclyn Penelope Browning is purchasing a Goat-Eating-Horse for me, however.

It's a new breed.

It's from Czechaslovakia.

Smurfy that's the Czech republic now, you might say.

SCREW THE CZECH REPUBLIC, I would respond.

Haha.

I just offended THe czech republicans.

Oh right, I have a project for biology too do.

I'll probably update again tonight..

IF YOU ARENT ALL IN A COMA BY THEN.

And remember, at 10:21 tonight,

Duck.

That's all I can say.

-Jimmy da SMYUF

Hee hee

Smurfy — 2004-08-19T06:08:00-05:00

* The patient before you was a goat.

* Instead of anesthetic he has you watch PBS.

* He has an assistant named Igor.

* The local bar association named him "Client of the Year."

* Whenever he leaves the room his nurse makes duck noises.

* During surgery he has to keep repeating that "thigh bone connected to the knee bone" song.

* Mike Wallace and a film crew are hanging out in his waiting room.

* He asks you to turn your head and cough during an eye exam. (Smurfy note: That ones very funny)

* You can beat him in a game of Operation.

* All his Medical books are from the Time-Life "Do-it-Yourself Series."

Lame blonde jokes.

Smurfy — 2004-08-20T05:08:00-05:00

How overdone, smurfy.

BLONDE COOKBOOK

MONDAY:
It's fun to cook for Bob. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately.

The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

TUESDAY:
Bob wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve
without dressing. So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Bob brought a friend home for supper.

WEDNESDAY:
A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kinda of silly but I took a bath.
I can't say it improved the rice any.

THURSDAY: Today Bob asked for salad again. I tried a new recipe. It said
prepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour
before serving. Which is what led up to Bob asking me why I was
rolling around in the garden.

FRIDAY:
I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put all ingredients
in bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with
this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I
left.

SATURDAY:
Bob did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked
me to dress it for Sunday (oh boy). For some reason Bob keeps
counting to ten.

SUNDAY:
Bob's folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast. All I
could find was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I
put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast.
It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY:
This has been a very exciting week. I am eager for tomorrow to
come so I can try out a new recipe on Bob. If we could just get
a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with Chocolate
Moose.

Futbal Americana

Smurfy — 2004-08-20T05:08:00-05:00

w00tations fools.

Looks like Smurfy made friends with this new girl from Pennsylvania today.

Senior chick, fool.

~.o

I also heard this terrible joke.

Smurfy all your jokes are terrible!

Lies.

bananas are opposite of stop lights. Yellow means go, green means wait a second, and red means where the heck did you get that banana?

I don't even think that ones funny.

I just wanted to point out the inferior quality of brain cells versus witt.

Witt is better then brain cells.

MESSAGE!

Football game tonight.

Bring Money.

Football games are like one humongous flirtation FESTIVAL for me.

You all know how obnoxiouslly flirty I get, so it's like...

Waaaay wiggy.

And by wiggy I obviously mean fun. And by fun I mean w00000000000t!

Had a moderetelly successful Board meeting for the drama club.

The only thing I could concentrate on however, was the fact that there were no other guys on the board.

All these girls and only I get to flirt!

Ah...

I'm having a perfectly ALRIGHT day today.

Tonight, it shall surely grow to be a better day, as spaghetii is about to be served.

We shall dine on delight.

"Though this be madness, yet there is method in it."

--From Hamlet (II, ii, 206)

Shakespeare.

^_^

Hurray for theater.

Looks like Harvey auditions are coming up!

I hope this time I get a part that someone doesn't drop OUT of...

Drama drama, you know how it is.

But anyway and half a sausage link.

I leave you with this quote from my spanish class.

We had just said some long word which means.."Peanut"

My teacher said it "is one of 5 or 6 words I know for peanuts"

It sounded odd, and suddenly this random black guy in the class goes

"Did you just say PENIS?!"

To which the class laughed remarkably loud, and answered:

"No, peanuts"

"Oh..haha...oops"

Too which we replied

EBEROOOOOO

February or something.

Que fasil!

Anyway.

I thought it was worth noting that that fellow made himself look stupid.

Oh yes,

it was Alex Cutler.

Go make fun of him sometime.

So wheres the goat information for today smurfy?

OH SCREW YOU I REPLY IN CAPS.

Now go comment before I knock some sense into your eyebrows. RAR.

"Though this be madness, yet there is method in 't."

Polonius whispers this as an aside, referring to Prince Hamlet, a brooding enigmatic character who may be pretending madness throughout much of the play. We see early on that Hamlet is despondent over the death of his father, and the hasty remarriage of his mother to his father's murderer. Feigning insanity allows Hamlet to say and do things not otherwise acceptable. Everyone looks for reasons for his madness. The queen believes it is related to Hamlet Sr.'s death and her haste in remarriage. Polonious believes it is because he ordered his own daughter, Ophelia, to break off her romance with Hamlet , yet notices that there is some order and rationality at the heart of Hamlet's madness, a "method" which will lead to revenge. This line has been commonly rephrased as "There's a method to his madness."

Football: The aftermath

Smurfy — 2004-08-21T12:08:00-05:00

Stupid leg muscles.

Stupid VOICE.

Well, at first it seemed very low profile.

It was just me Sam And Ben.

That was it.

Then after I made an excursion down to the boardwalk, I found Jason and the Emo Krew.

Emo Kids.

::nods::

So I trucked them all up to our usual bleachers section at the top of the stands, and Jaclyn and Erin were now there.

Madison and Whats-her-face...uh...red hair..whatever..LIZA..ha..yes..

They wouldn't come up, because they hate our bleachers.

Whatever.

After a short time, 2nd quarter, we all went down to the area beside the bleachers in front of the secondary concession stand.

After noting that "Future Jared" was indeed stoned, we stared at his middle aged multi-colored pot smoking hair and wondered how the heck anyone could look so creepy just sitting down.

After that it's pretty much anyones guess what happened.

I attempted some lame conversation with melanie and she just gave me the verbal finger.

But that's alright,

It's on her now.

~_^

Boy do I love drama drama.

What was I going to say now?

This guy, JEFF, from parkland got pissed off because our school wasn't DIVERSE.

Our school is so diverse.

92% White.

That's diverse, right?

I didn't see that cool senior girl though.

That was depressing.

Also I have to admit my flirting ratio was down immensely.

I was MELLOW.

John Stamper scored something something.

I used to be able to run faster then him when we were in elementary school.

Then he went and got STRONG.

Now he just sort of floats from one end of the field to the other.

He filled some of the big shoes our seniors left last year.

Also, at the game I saw Toni.

Little tiny short groovy immensely far out Toni, although there was immediete lack of Lucy or Michelle Cohen, depressingly enough.

I did talk to this one girl at the football game, Who's name I can't remember right now.

I'm so terrible at names.

I guess I'm off, unless I had something else to say.

I'm sure I do, But I won't remember it until I leave for the night

I'm kinda stupid like that.

I did see afro-guy.

I forget his name too.

Time to once again restock myself with some foot-pain relief.

Standing for 4 hours does that too you, you know.

That soreness thing.

I have got a heckuva lot of homework to do.

Projects.

And Crap.

-Ranting about everything while maintaining a 3.0 average,
Smurfy

When in doubt, use a shop vac.

Smurfy — 2004-08-21T04:08:00-05:00

I realized I had an odd obsession today.

While in the middle of doing a "CAR WASH" Like every organization in the world does, I realized I deeply enjoyed using a shop vac to suck up odd objects.

I pulled 10 yissues out of a box just so I could suck them up usuing ht power of the shop vac.

I sucked up 3 of this one kids crayons.

I "Accidentily" sucked up around 72 cents worth of change, and also 6 paper clips, a little bag with one french fry in it, and a part of a car I'm sure someone wanted to re-attach.

But the thing was, I was so amazed at how I could suck random objects into the cleaner, it took to long to actually vacuum.

But dude.

Shop vac's rule.

(Also inhaled were two straws, a pencil, a ball point pen, one sock, a shoestring, and I sucked up a whole cup of water.)

I AM OBSESSED WITH SHOP VACS

THE DOOMSDAY DEVICE!

Also,

Smurfy — 2004-08-21T04:08:00-05:00

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/madhamster.php

Not very funny.

But I like the songs.

Also, speaking of songs, I finally killed the one in my background music.

You can't listen to a bad MIDI version of Ben Folds' Brick but for so long.

The Race

Smurfy — 2004-08-22T12:08:00-05:00

The races at bowman gray only prove that pissing off rednecks is a bad idea.

What is

Smurfy — 2004-08-22T02:08:00-05:00

Tuberculosis

A) A lame research paper

B) A semi-extinct llama from northeast asia

C) A stupid project

D) A disease

E) All of the above plus .70 cents for tax.

Oh..SEXY

Smurfy — 2004-08-22T05:08:00-05:00

Walkin' on the sun.

Smash Mouth.

Remember to tell me if the lame MIDI music gets annoying.

Also, go check out these groovy Icons man.

Brittany mankes them. You remember her.

She's the one who continually didn't bring me the holy grail.

You knoowwww

Monty PYTHON

Anyway

http://www.livejournal.com/users/midnightparade

Go check it out, because my HTML LINK SKILLZ suck.

CRAZY cool icons...

Reason to hate idiots of the day/Reason to like funny kids:

Smurfy — 2004-08-23T07:08:00-05:00

"But illegal aliens have rights just like WE do"

Announced proudly, one HISPANIC girl.

Sure, she's from Mexico.

But if I say MEXICAN

I might get KILLED by members of the ANTI SAYING MEXICAN ANNONYMOUS BLOG POST DEATH SQUAD.

To which I said to her:

You're freaking stupid.

Then this quote came up,

"Well why are M & M's and Eminem the same eh?"

Brian replied:

"Well.

They ARE both chocolate on the inside"

-End of pointless post.

LAUGH IT UP SUCKERS.

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/badgerphone.php

Mannnn

Smurfy — 2004-08-24T07:08:00-05:00

I SWEAR I'll have an actual UPDATE sometime withing the next 24 hours.

HONEST!

In the meantime, this new song is way groovy.

"A favor house atlantic"

My my.

Smurfy — 2004-08-25T07:08:00-05:00

It turns out this guy from Harvey, Wilson, is like the part written for me.

I too, want to abe a man from a medical ward who carries women off into random cells, and flirts with their daughters.

I TOO WANT TO PUT AN UNLIT CIGAR INTO MY MOUTH FOR 6 SCENES.

After that I read an away message that said

"im gone u find me"

To which I thought,

Has the youth of today lost all sense of what the english language can PRODUCE, if you just spell the FREAKING word YOU.

JUST SPELL YOU.

Lord.

Other'n that, I don't see any reason in continuing this discussion.

Picture day is TOday.

TO.

So I have my snazzy white/black shirts on with the suave jeans.

SUAVE.

Also, it seems as of note that it's gonna take alot to fill those shoes.....with cement so they sink to the bottom....

~smurfy

This girl. She is so STUPID.

Smurfy — 2004-08-26T07:08:00-05:00

Stupid girl: "Why are you DOING that"
Smurfy: "Doing what?"
SG: "Making all that NOISE"
S: "I was sighing?"
SG: "You've been doing it for like an HOUR"
S: "Class in only 45 minutes long"
SG: "YOU'RE THE BIGGEST JERK I'VE EVER MET"

___________________________

Guy taking Pictures : "Now, turn your head a bit"
Smurfy: "Which way?"
:::CLICK:::
GTP: "Next!"
Smurfy: "WAIT! I wasn't ready!"
GTP: "MOVE KID."

___________________________

As you can see, yesterday was mostly retarded, with light bits of lame insults coming in every now and then.

Stupid kids.

I'm so going to mess up that stupid girls hair.

crap

Smurfy — 2004-08-27T07:08:00-05:00

More news at 11

Well

Smurfy — 2004-08-27T07:08:00-05:00

Looks like everyone is an idiot these days.

So the mortality is real

Smurfy — 2004-08-27T06:08:00-05:00

Going to my great-unlces funeral Wednesday night, I was reminded once more of my great grandmother stewarts untimely death.

In 1988, 3 months before I was to be born, my great grandmother recieved an urgent telephone call from her niece, who happens to be blind.

It seems her husband, in a drunken rage, is trying to kill her. She wants her grandmother to get some people together and come help her.

When my great grandmother stewart arrived at the mans house, with one of my uncles and a few cousins, he pulled out a gun.

Declaring some irrational thing, he shot my grandmother dead. He shot my uncle as well.

he placed a call to 911 stating that he had just shot two people.

He was arrested later that night.

In the court's, he was found not guilty, and only sentenced to probation from ever stepping foot inside lewisvilles township again.

His name eludes me at this second.

But seeing her daughter, Ruby, at the funeral home, I could not help but be reminded of this.

I don't know why it stays on my mind on odd occasions, but at least theres a medium to pour it into..

Oh my

Smurfy — 2004-08-27T06:08:00-05:00

"You're breathing too loud"

So I;m getting my test back from Mr. Clyburn, the incredibly dull civics teacher.

I notice on my paper I have recieved an A! WHA?!?! I stated firmly. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HECK WERE DOIGNR IGHT NOW?!?!

This attracted the attention of Femi, made her usual "UGLY WHITE KID" face at me. In return, I did the most mature thing possibly and threw paper into her hair.

Now, Smurfy, was this the right thing to do?

Nope.

But you know. If your names Femi

You know?

Anyway.

I ordered my class ring, and everthing was going normal..until thursday!

During my math class, as my math teacher, miss storey was going over the hoemwork, she suddenly slumped against the dry erase board, and squaked out: "Someone..please..come up here now!"

She immdedietelly fell over and collapsed to the floor.

I, along with 2 or 3 other people, ran up quickly to see her.

My first thoughts were that she had just had a heart attack.

I kneeled down beside her, and her eyes were rolling, but she was still breathing normally, it seemed.

4 or 5 other kids went out into the hallways trying to get another teacher over to our location.

As I continued to kneel down beside her, another girl come over to her side. After feeling her forehead she said she was incredibly unusually hott.

I reached behind her rolling cart and got out her canteen of water, and gave it to the other girl while I stepped back and looked at some of the other kids in the class.

Some morons, the jock kids, seemed to be laughing. I haven't been so mad in quite awhile, but rest assured I was.

After attending a gym class later that day, and having one of them same kids from my math class declare I was "Queer" because I liked to use "dumbass sarcasm"

I firmly solidifed my belief that anyone who is deemed "Jock", is hardly worht the energy of ignorance.

Distasteful, at best.

This has been the weekend update.

See you on..THE OTHER SIDE...of...FRIDAY..or..SATURDAY!

Speaking of.

I'm going to carowinds saturday.

It's going to suck quite a bit.

I'll come back with more tales from the mind of smurfy, as soon as I can figure out where the heck I put my wallet. Blasted thing.

I NEED MY PERMIT!

SO I CAN DO PERMITTED THINGS!

And can you say horror without it sounding like whore?

"I need to watch a whore movie"

Woah

Smurfy — 2004-08-27T09:08:00-05:00

I found..much...MUCH better background music..Enjoy,

"Hotel California"

God bless the Eagles, I tell you what man.

And I tripped 5000 hits now!

It's so amazing, to see people respond to this.

Especially considering the onyl material I have here is my politically incorrect jabber and pointless nonsense.

But isn't that what the world is REALLY about?

Selected Conan O'brien jokes

Smurfy — 2004-08-27T10:08:00-05:00

I wish he came on now.

Argh.

Accursed olyimpics.

"The Associated Press reports that over 500 million people in China have never brushed their teeth. In a related story, China has just changed its name to England."

"According to CNN, many people along the campaign trail are now coming up to Teresa Kerry and telling her to keep speaking her mind. Not surprisingly, they all work for the Bush campaign."

"Yesterday, President Bush tried to appeal to voters in Iowa by peeling a raw ear of corn and eating it. Afterwards, Bush said, 'That's the worst banana I've ever tasted.' "

You really can't argue that Bush really does make better jokes then kerry.

We should re-elect him just to have more jokes, like these.

Look at what the nation gains by laughing at things that aren't necessarily funny yet somehow ARE!

~_~

Smurfy — 2004-08-28T11:08:00-05:00

Update.

Scre the calendar.

HAHA!

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T04:08:00-05:00

Expect more news at 11.

Only on the station that people at madison garden say:

"FOX NEWS SUCKS!
FOX NEWS SUCKS!"

Stupid marchers.

Gather 5000 people to march against something besides fox news

So, it all comes down to this.

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T06:08:00-05:00

Carowinds can be lethal to your mind.

On the way to said theme park yesterday, I eagerly anticipated riding "The borg assimilator"

Haha.

Freaking two and a HALF hour wait.

Oh, screw THAT ride.

So I just did topgun thrice, the hurricane, ricohet, 4 times (that coaster rocks)

and..uh..

my head stopped responding well after that

Coasters do that. but MAN do I love getting trashed by the HURLER.

The coolest coaster in the world.

Next to say

a cooler coaster.

9.84 cents for 12 chicken nuggets and a medium drink.

2.99 for a 20 ounce bottle of water.

5.00 for two pieces of fudge

1.00 I lost
___________________

Thats like.

25 bucks.

on GARBAGE.

Luckily, I have De niro on me.

Like.

SIXTY FOUR DOLLARS.

I am so loaded.

So 42 text messages later, I arrived back home.

Slightly conscious of the fact I spent 10 dollars on crappy chicken nuggets.

A joke

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T06:08:00-05:00

A NEW SMURFY JOKE

Boy is this a good one.

ready? Cause these are CLASSICS.

_______________________

This one couple was in a counseling session with ..a counselor.

They had gotten around to discussing cheating and it was the wife's turn to talk.

"Have you ever cheated on your husband?"

The counselor asked.

"well....3 times..I have cheated on him Three times..."

Immedietelly, the husband looked depressed, but the wife began to talk.

"Remember love, when we were out of money, and you needed a raise at your work? Didn't you ever wonder how come he changed his mind so quickly?"

"wow..you did that for me? well...What was the other time?" The man asked his wife.

"Welll...you remember that time you got that ticket for speeding? And then it got revoked the next week?"

"Wow...that's..I didn't know that...what was the last time?"

"Well, do you remember that time you were running for president of the hunting club, and you were short 17 votes?"
________________________

O.o

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T10:08:00-05:00

For some odd reason, I began recieving alerts about posts that occured back in june today in my mailbox.

Anyone else get this crazy messed up....glitchy thing?

BYRON SAID LOL

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T10:08:00-05:00

Novancaiel: Sigh...in the 31st century, we called it empathy and compassion.
BonziBuddyX: We call it that here, too, man.
Raining SkyFire: Noo
Novancaiel: Heh.
Raining SkyFire: It's angst now
EVILKNIGHT4002: heh
BonziBuddyX: Dude, ssh.
Novancaiel: lol
BonziBuddyX: ...
BonziBuddyX: Oh my god.
mayflower27023: ITS THE EPOCOLISPE
BonziBuddyX: Apocalypse, Imani.
Raining SkyFire: *APOCOLYPSE
EVILKNIGHT4002: appocolypse
Raining SkyFire: IDIOT

Welcome to the hotel california..

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T10:08:00-05:00

EAGLES LYRICS

"Hotel California"

On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night
There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself,
'This could be Heaven or this could be Hell'
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
Plenty of room at the Hotel California
Any time of year, you can find it here

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes Benz
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat.
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget

So I called up the Captain,
'Please bring me my wine'
He said, 'We haven't had that spirit here since nineteen sixty nine'
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...

Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
They livin' it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise, bring your alibis

Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said 'We are all just prisoners here, of our own device'
And in the master's chambers,
They gathered for the feast
They stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can't kill the beast

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
'Relax,' said the night man,
We are programmed to receive.
You can checkout any time you like,
but you can never leave!

The first part of a story I wrote

Smurfy — 2004-08-29T10:08:00-05:00

This story takes place in the 1950's..

There was once a man in a small part of the outer banks who's name was Jonathan Hamm. He was a lifeguard on the coast, and had been for quite some time. One day, when there was some terribel rip currents out in the seas, Jonathon caught sight and heard a woman screaming.

He dove into the water, and pulled the woman out of the water. It was the most beautiful person he had ever laid his eyes on. After making sure she was alright, Jonathan asked her what her name was. She was a 19 year old girl, 2 years younger then he, who had come to live with her aunt. Her name has Cathleen Richards.

She was very grateful to the man, and asked if there was anything she could ever do to repay him for saving her life. He said that having dinner with him the next day would satisfy any want he could have.

Several months later, the couple was deeply in love. It was a joke between them, whenever it happened to be spoken, that cathleen swore she would save Jonathons life if he was ever in trouble in the water. How could you ever do that, Jonathon would smile, when you cannot swim yourself?

(I'll finish the rest...sometime....tell me if it sounds good or not. Of course theres no..PLOT yet..so..egh..whatever)

What a world.

Smurfy — 2004-08-30T08:08:00-05:00

Listening to the republican convention has once again enflamed my passion for beating down idiots.

Man do I love doing that.

BRALRKABAYAJGHGAITY.

"Your desks are too close together! Move them!"

RAWR

I always win those fights.

Well, gettin around the issue of number 47.

I attended the auditions for Harvey, which were at school today.

I was signed up for the 4 audition slot, but I hung around for another hour just to be mellow and hang out with all the groovin' drama chilluns.

Kat can attest to my flag football dominating skills.

My battle cry, which echoes each tackle I make, is as follows:

"YEAH FOOL, SMURFY KILLZ U"

I swear.

Stupid jocks.

STUPID GRASS.

I once again questioned humanity when Taylor Murphy as usual sat at the little "LUNCH TABLLLLEE" And let out an unusually disturbing monologue about ripping my hair out and forming a mullett so I would stop saying he had one.

Taylor Murphy, you freaking have a mullett.

A STUPID MULLETT.

After a rousing chat with Jane-anne during my auditions, I became quite relaxed! Mostly due to the fact that I had J-Pop blaring from every direction and I was within the realms of creativity and mellowsness, shade, and breeze, that should always accompany a groovy time.

That is why, for the first in a long time, I have classified today as "Groovesday"

If you look back on the blog, you'll notice that there have only been 4 groovesdays.

Ever!

Crazy.

I indulged into my usual rampart about sprite's stupid logo during my civics class today.

You know,

"Thirst"

"Thirst", you see, is represented as a very small black man with an afro.

Now, when I imagine the personification of "Thirst", one of the last things that occur in my mind, is a tiny black man with an afro, declaring that it's: "Hotter then a devil's DRAWAZ"

Which led me to post this quote from my spanish class.

Teacher: "TJ, why must you get into so many peoples BUSINESS?"

TJ: "Man dawg I aint been not doin nothin dawg"

Quote,

unquote.

My faith in humanities future is silently killed in a corner, and sold on the black market for organ transplants.

Kinda like that one episode of Aqua Teen.

I also came to the startling conclusion about how insanely abnormal my thought process was.

In theater class, today,

we began our short "Radio Skits"

I was newspaper reporter man.

Ego fame crazed maniac.

I fit the part perfectly, needless to say.

and so, with this part of the day complete, I enter the state known as "REPLYING TO EVERY SINGLE COMMENT ON MY BLOG"

Adios, anyone stupid enough to have read this whole thing.

~SMURFY AND HIS POSSE OF MTV VMA SHOW HATERS.

(Expect rant after I throw stuff at Femi)

XD

Smurfy — 2004-08-30T09:08:00-05:00

I just found a japanese version of the song

"Television Man"

And, I also found

"If I had a million Dollars",
By the BareNaked Ladies, the only good thing to come from canada since the radioactive beaver invasion into antartica in 1927.

It's the new background music.

Does that mean it's better then "Hotel California"?

HAHAHA.

No.

It just means I got tired of hearing it's opening chords when I looked at my stuff.

My day is complete.

and this makes 31

Smurfy — 2004-08-31T07:08:00-05:00

I somehow managed to post everyday this month.

Since I achieved my goal, I no longer will attempt a badly written post on days when I have no time to make my regular badly written posts.

w00tations.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-08-31T07:08:00-05:00

The new background is a little on the loud side, but you can handle it!

"But I am NOT wearing ANY trousers!"

I actually said somthing funny during improv today.

Imagine that.

Thats my indian character being questioned at an airport after triggering the metal detector.

The australian behind him said

YEAH MATE, JUST PULL THE FRIGGIN BOMB OUTO YA TROUSERS AND ITS ALL COOL MATE.

To which I replied, with my other shirt on my head,

I am not wearing trousers!

What are these trousers you speak of?

But you know.

All loud and smurfy like.

Rawr.

TODAY WAS FAIRLY GROOVY WITH PATCHES OF UNCOOLNESS.

More updates when I finish theseblasted reports on virginia foxx.

Idiot.

Well, my friends

Smurfy — 2004-08-31T08:08:00-05:00

it appears as if I finally aggravated the one named FEMI to the point of..uh..AGGRAVATION.

Unless she wasnt before.

Whatever.

Heres the SCOOP.
Curse my blatant immaturity.

Also, I noted that some of my co-bus-riders who happen to be "African-American" like to call my bus driver a "Nigga"

I don't quite grasp it.

Maybe it's because I'm white.

We fight for civil rights for God knows how many years, and now it's just a "Nickname".

Perhaps humanity is doomed to retardation.

Man do I hate my generation.

And it's stupid..generation..thingies..people..whatnot..

UGH

Smurfy — 2004-08-31T09:08:00-05:00

I can't believe I made a typo on the PICTURE.

What an IDIOT.

Oh my.

Smurfy — 2004-08-31T09:08:00-05:00

And I seriously somehow just screwed up my encoding.

For some reason the HTML for the background is embedded into the field.

Problems problems problems...

if you have adive on how to fix this problem, seeing your background image thing so fried, let me know

Dude.

Smurfy — 2004-09-01T10:09:00-05:00

Okay,

moron of the day.

I saw a man pull up to the burger king parking lot in a bright yellow new convertible.

He pulled up, and hopped out, and locked the doors.

Thing was, the top was down.

Now, personally

I feel that this man was retarded.

maybe I'm just a jerk.

Who knows.

I realized my seat in theater arts sucks.

and I spent over 2 hours on the phone.

That's like.

A smurfy-impossibility.

That just doesn't happen.

Scroll button wearing out?

Well.

Tough.

While I was on my bus today, a short little kid with blonde hair came running up (This was before we left), smacked this guy in the face, kicked him in the knee, then ran back off the bus. Apparently his name is "Travis". So when he ran off, I tripped ihm, and blamed it on the guy he just hit for some reason.
RAWR. He immedietelly kicked him again and ran off.

Glory be.

I still have a typo on that picture.

I gotta fix that stupid thing.

other'n that.

Today was just...ehhhhhh...

EMPTY.

Yeah.

Later suckas.

MY FOOT, IT IS IN TOO DEEP!

Smurfy — 2004-09-02T04:09:00-05:00

AYE!

I have a way of running my mouth too much.

ESPECIALLY WHEN FEMI FINDS YOUR BLOG.

Hahaha.

Boy.

Good thing I have that friends only button ready for deployment.

I am so screwed.

Otherwise, my opinions stay put, fresh in resolve to be my opinions.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO SMURFYS MOUTH

NEW music..AGAIN...

Smurfy — 2004-09-02T06:09:00-05:00

It'll take a good long time to load though.

It's TWO HUNDRED FIFTY SIX "k"

(Smurfy note: Actually, nevermind, I just changed it back to the barenaked ladies)

And you heard of the new 'dew?

Mountain Dew:
PITCH BLACK
This, is added with

Mountain Dew:
BAJA BLAST

Mountain Dew:
LIVEWIRE

Mountain Dew:
CODE RED

Mountain Dew:
MOUNTAIN DEW

And
MOUNTAIN DEW:
THE MOVIE:
THE MINISERIES:
THE NOVEL:
2

Anyone else hyped about seeing that new movie,

SkyCaptian, and the WORLD OF TOMMOROW?

That looks hott.

Now I'm anxious of course...

The call back list for harvey is out tomorow at school.

Let's hope I didn't suck too much.

AYYYYEE.

Also,

What do you get when you cross 4 quizzes, 3 papers, and a lame dinner?

One pissed off smurfy child.

Don't mine me, IM JUST DRINKING MY DEW.

But for now it's backt o writing about VIRGINIA FOXX.

Boy do I despise virginia foxx...

I'm still hyped about arnold schwarzeneggar's speech at the republican convetion though,

FOWAR MUR YEAYERS!

FOWAR MUR YEAYERS!

You know they are actually proposing an ammendment to the constitution se he can run for president?

I wouldn't mind arnold as president at all.

I think that would be fun and very very amusing.

Who else wouldn't want a president that could easily just TALK his opponents into submission.

Personally,

I'm voting for Arnold, even if he CANT say four more years.

SMURFY.

(Anime is teh suck)

Bah.

Smurfy — 2004-09-02T10:09:00-05:00

I finally fixed the header.

No more typos.

^_^!

Celebrate with a bottle of MOUNTAIN DEW PITCH BLACK.

And possibly,

just maybe,

a crappy background midi file.
'

I also found this rather amusing post by SmurfHunter

Andrew (smurfhunter) wrote,
@ 2004-08-31 16:12:00

very dead squirel
Today as I was walking home from school I was thinking to myself about how nice it was outside,when I almost stepped on an extremely massive squirel.I then jumped to my senses and decieded to poke it with a stick. It was definitally dead. The moral of this story is squerils are amusing regardless of how dead they are

Sounded kinda cool

Smurfy — 2004-09-02T11:09:00-05:00

"...'fire' does not matter, 'earth' and 'air' and 'water' do not
matter. 'I' do not matter. No word matters. But man forgets reality
and remembers words. The more words he remembers, the cleverer do his
fellows esteem him. He looks upon the great transformations of the
world, but he does not see them as they were seen when man looked upon
reality for the first time. Their names come to his lips and he smiles
as he tastes them, thinking he knows them in the naming."
-- Siddartha, _Lord_of_Light_ by Roger Zelazny

ohh SNAP.

Smurfy — 2004-09-03T04:09:00-05:00

What a semi-sucking not really too bad but pretty ungroovy day today was.

I got the crap beat out of me during gym class. That's for sure.

I was making fun of the idiot kid, matt green, like usual, when all the sudden "Blain Thompson" comes out of nowhere belting out things like "STOP MAKING FUN OF THE STUPUD KIDS."

Good intentions, of course, but isn't he hypocritical? Let's review.

It's 30 minutes before we go out to play football, and what is "Blain Thompson" doing, but making fun of MATT GREEN!

Good heavens.

And while this is going on I get rammed in the back by "Kyle Walker" and trampled over many times.

I didn't even feel that, man.

That was some push, let me tell you.

Then I found new backgroun music, as usual, but not before I discovered that I made call-backs.

Yippy!

I'm quite afriad she wants me to do the lead role, and I don't really think I'm a "Lead role" kinda guy.

Too forgetful, and I have a seriously notorious attention span, noted for being a bad one.

CRAP!
hang on

Finish in a few

STOLEN: Lame blog entries from around the world..and...MINDSAY

Smurfy — 2004-09-03T10:09:00-05:00

Q: How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None, they just sit in the dark and cry about it.

Q: How many punks does it take to change lightbulb?

A: None. Punks only talk about change.

and

Q: How many punks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb and one to say that he liked the old lightbulb better.

Q: How many add kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Wanna go ride bikes?

haha.

Jokes.

LAME JOKES.
______________________

5:21pm - yay happy!!! ok..i had a biology test today..i was kinda easy i thought. but if i failed im just kidding, it was the hardest thing ever.
school is retarded. i hate english. it sucks so bad. we have homework every night and we have to read books with big words...who does that? i like math because i have friends in my class...and we have fun...talking...about stuff..yeah.lol. AP history is so gay and my teacher is crazy...he makes funny faces and laughs like a...monkey. i dunno. Ag is the same, except for more work and notes. ap bio isn't that bad. DC is funny
my new laptop is great and i love it. i have internet now and i spend too much time on messenger. yay. mom yelled at me and told me that the computer wasnt just for chatting and that i should do something useful with it...so i spent money
today was a good day..not much happened..school..i heard that some people were talking crap about my best friend and i had an allsups burrito...yay allsups! leave a comment after the beep...ZOINK! I MEAN BEEP!
__________________
September 2nd, 2004.

Kate pulled another stupid..

7:56pm - I was talking to Jason online, eating oreos, and doing my math... and I guess crumbs got all over the graphs on the book and they looked like points, so i started freaking marking them down... and then I sneezed.

_______________

Boy.

I love doing that.

So,

I was in little richards,

and who should I see walk in but Sarah Kate Matthews.

I think I choked on my burger.

Possibly.

And also, This girl,

Lizzy Cohee,

She tells me she read my entire blog out of boredom yesterday.

Poor girl..

Dude, IIII Don't even read my blog.

::nods:::

FAWAR MOWAR YEARZ!

And I'm reporting for duty.

~_^

Good job at making me think I'm funny again Christin.

Thou doth certainly roxor.

And KAT.

She needs to play more FOOTBALL.

So we had some conversation...

Smurfy — 2004-09-03T10:09:00-05:00

it's civics class.

Otherwise known as your DOOM.

It all started when someone in the class made a refernce to someone else in the class, and for some strange reason we began talking about jehovah's witnesses.

Don't ask me, but it sure was intresting.

See,

It all began when the normal class idiots began questioning how "JH's" can build churches in 3 days.

Through the power of THEIR RELIGION.

And building contractors.

~_^

But that led to some people talking about how annoying door to door religion salesmen are.

There's not an issue with tracts for me at all, I've left some before,

but...

See,

if you're riding a bicycle,

in say,

my neighborhood.

And you want to ...SAYYY..

Ring my DOORBELL.

WRONG, SUCKAH.

The guy Christin always talks to and for some reason makes eye contact with me said something about that.

But my ego was blocking my ears. I'm SURE Christin, the one who has eye contact problems, had something to say too.

I think it all sunk into my head as

"Man are they ANNOYING"

or something along those lines.

And I'm sure at some point I said "Mexicans"

I think that led to another class disscussion about how mexicans don't exist.

I'm sure they must have, at some point.

Blast it.

I had a point when I staretd this entry.

Now I'm just jabbering.

buildings..door to door..the word mexican...um...

Crap.

Oh wait! Haha! STORY!

See, we we're at my uncles house once, and then the bicyclle bound Witness guys came to the door, and my uncle's like

"haha...watch this.."

"HELLO THERE!" They announced loudly.

"What...do you..WANT" My uncle replied.

"well.." etc, stuff.

"Sirs, I am a SATANIST. GET OFF MY LAWN"

They walked backwards a bit and peddled off.

Kind of amusing.

I think thats the keyword to making them leave, I'm not sure.

Remember kids,

When in doubt, it's best to just delete the blog entry.

See? Like this one.

Let's count how many people I've offended with this one.

(13) Jehova's Witnesses
(4) Satanists
(1) Femi
(9) Spanish-Americans
(7) Random passerby's
(1) Femi again

Curse my luck!

Is it REALLY?

Smurfy — 2004-09-03T11:09:00-05:00

Raining SkyFire: WAIT
Raining SkyFire: BATTLE
Raining SkyFire: WAR
Raining SkyFire: New Jersey nonetheless played a pivotal role in the war. It was the scene of five major battles and two hundred minor encounters.
eventachic: YES!
eventachic: MAJOR BATTLE
Raining SkyFire: THREEEEEEEE
eventachic: yay
eventachic: which ones
Raining SkyFire: It doesnt..say..
Raining SkyFire: U_U
eventachic: sigh
Raining SkyFire: but
Raining SkyFire: that gives us hope!
eventachic: of what?
Raining SkyFire: ..uh..
Raining SkyFire: /...
Raining SkyFire: Oh screw it
Raining SkyFire: New jersey sucks.
eventachic: i know
eventachic: sigh!
eventachic: tommorrow noonish at sanders house
Raining SkyFire: we have INFORMATION now?
Raining SkyFire: GASSSSp
eventachic: yeah what a friggin miracle
Raining SkyFire: XD

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-03T11:09:00-05:00

mmmm

5560 hits, some foo fighters, and a whole lotta attitude.

Sounds like a night to remember.

If the music is groovy...

Smurfy — 2004-09-04T12:09:00-05:00

Do you believe in magic in a young girl's heart
How the music can free her, whenever it starts
And it's magic, if the music is groovy
It makes you feel happy like an old-time movie
I'll tell you about the magic, and it'll free your soul
But it's like trying to tell a stranger 'bout rock and roll

If you believe in magic don't bother to choose
If it's jug band music or rhythm and blues
Just go and listen it'll start with a smile
It won't wipe off your face no matter how hard you try
Your feet start tapping and you can't seem to find
How you got there, so just blow your mind

If you believe in magic, come along with me
We'll dance until morning 'til there's just you and me
And maybe, if the music is right
I'll meet you tomorrow, sort of late at night
And we'll go dancing, baby, then you'll see
How the magic's in the music and the music's in me

Yeah, do you believe in magic
Yeah, believe in the magic of a young girl's soul
Believe in the magic of rock and roll
Believe in the magic that can set you free
Ohh, talking 'bout magic

Do you believe like I believe Do you believe in magic
Do you believe like I believe Do you believe, believer
Do you believe like I believe Do you believe in magic
{Fade}

Just call me Lightning Rider, THE VIOLATOR.

Smurfy — 2004-09-04T01:09:00-05:00

SW DVD Changes Confirmed
Fri, Sep 03, 04 02:07:56 AM EDT

The DarkLord files this report after cracking open a case of SWE DVDs. We'll have our hands on a few copies next week, so we'll give you the full rundown:
I work for a retail store and today we got in our SW trilogy dvds and I would like to confirm some of the changes to the movies. In episode IV they did clean Jabba up he still looks fake but better. Ian did infact redo the Emperor's scenes with new dialog in empire, and finally yes they did add Naboo to the ending of Jedi as well as add Hayden to the end of Jedi as well.
Again yes it is confirmed I have seen them with my own two eyes.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

http:/theforce.net

I CANT WAIT FOR THESE FREAKING DVD'S!

Star Wars Original Tilogy disc set, launching september 20th.

BOOYA, SUCKAHS!

49.95

FOUR discs.

Personally, I'm shooting for the vader box.

I have the original trilogy, released a bllion years ago,
the re-released VHS set,

and I'm SO getting this dvd re-release...

naboo shots, new dialog, all this crazy stuff..

Forget sanity, Star Wars PWNS you ALL.

And check out this t-shirt for episode III!

\

Then I just deicded, lets go star wars crazy here.

Random "Cool Name" Generator by Bluez
Your mundane first name
"Cool" first name	Lightning
"Cool" last name	Rider
"Cool" title	"The Violator"
How to use this name	Yell your name to everyone you Pwn.

Quiz created with MemeGen!

Get to know the REAL you by crash_and_burn
Your Name
You Are A:	Prep
Your Favorite Band/Song	Britney Spears - Slave 4 U
You Like To Read:	Everything
You Firmly Believe In:	God
Everyone Thinks You Are:	You don't have any friends
You Were Conceived:	In a cheap motel
You Will Marry:	A religious fanatic

Quiz created with MemeGen!

Good heavens, are you INSANE?

Smurfy — 2004-09-04T07:09:00-05:00

I spent the entire afternnon text messaging.

I sent 72 text messsages.

and like, 67 of them went to Jaque.

My thumbs are NUMB.

who in their right mind sends 72 text messages.

WHO SENDS 72 TEXT MESSAGES.

Smurfy you IDIOT

And I just can't resist the urge to keep adding new BACKGROUND music.

I just can't!

I also added a little thing at the bottom to tell you whats playing, so you don't have to guess.

I'm just CRRRRAZY like that

I've been thinking.

Smurfy — 2004-09-05T01:09:00-05:00

And now my head aches.

These long weekends are always a killer for my blog.

I never know what to write on a weekend.

It's like, my usual jabber, onyl intensified to include LESS then nothing, instead of the usual, ONLY nothing.

Know what I mean?

Yeah.

I don't either.

The thing is, people, you just ahve to...THINK...would you rather WRITE in a blog..or would you like to look up the definitions of: Perfidious..or..sagacious.. and study them for 3-9 days? Don't be obtuse! Eh. English.

Persoally, I don't feel the desire to mark down sentence patterns mindlessly for hours on end. Just don't get turned on by it like some folks.

You know?

Yeah.

I still don't either.

So I got like, this job offer for this radio station. Sort of. What I would do, is every home game for west, I would call into this radio station and give a minute long report for halftime, and one for the end game.

Isn't that nifty?

The thing is,

I have no idea what half the stuff that happens in a football game means, mostly due to my blatant nerd-ness.

Nerds are sexy.

So, I'm not quite sure if I want to learn about it or not.

But you know, everyone needs to hear the word "Groovy" every now and then on the radio. Maybe it owuld help to..spread the "WORD"...HAHAHAHAHA! PUN! BWHAHAHA!

Ohhh by.

Smurfy you IDIOT.

Whew.

I hate to think I"m making a point here, so let me delve off onto something equally nonsensical.

I also got to thinking about the whole "BLOG T SHIRT" thing.

That got so screwed over.

I'm pretty sure that's never happening.

But it sure is fun to SAY!

HYUK!

Besides, who wants to wear a tshirt with my face on it, saying

WALMART KILLZ U

or

WALMART IS TEH ####

Eh.

@_@...

But anyway,

Concluding,

Sometime...

Oh, wait, I can't have any news posted without mentioning

HURRICANE FRANNNNCESSSSS

HYUK!

Because, of course, since it's a hurricane, it shoudl rule any news broadcast, from here into saturn and back.

Trust me.

IT'S THE LAW™

Sort of like how, when you have to go somewhere quickly in the smurfmobile, but all's you hear is

HOLD ON!

and

YOU'RE ADOPTED!

Because that happens to me, quiiite a bit.

Trust me.

Because...

I told you too.

Now another thing that's taken to pissing me off lately, is this whole "Stereotyping Old People" thing.

"Ageism" they call it.

Theres a whole article I read about how

"Over the Hill" gag gift products are creating a false image of old folks.

To that, I say,

You are really freakin' stupid, newspaper article reporter.

I'm never going to stop liking over the hill gag gifts, because some half brained newspaper reporter says it creates false images of old people, by making it look like they enjoy prunes, or need canes.

So if you use a cane, remember,

You're killing newspaper reporters, and their KITTY'S.

And PUPPIES.

You sick liking over the hill gag gifts likers.

The one and only,
Except for that other guy,

-SMURFY-

Cool John Kerry quotes

Smurfy — 2004-09-05T02:09:00-05:00

Becuase I can bash liberals all I care too, heres a few groovy little quotes I found enlightening

The Economy Sucks. Your Life is Worthless, you Dog

In a Washington suburb today, John Kerry laid out his ten point reality check for America. According to Sen. Kerry, the American economy is in ruins thanks to George W. Bush. "Today, most American families live on rotting scraps found in garbage cans. More than 90% of Americans have inadequate healthcare and will die a terrible death next year if George Bush is re-elected.

The rich homeowners live in fancy houses, collect their equity and don't give a damn about the two-hundred+ million US citizens living under trees, behind rocks and in our country's southern swamps.

"If you can't see just how bad America has become, then you're an even bigger imbecile than I thought," said Kerry. "Just look around, our economy and our country reeks of extreme poverty, filth and squallier...I hate it here, and so should you!"

Http://www.kerrycore.com

Kerry hates it here!

:_____________________(

In front of a crowd of obviously dejected Democratic supporters, John Kerry reassured his base that the Iraq situation was "still pretty bad". Kerry instructed the crowd of angry, dirty foaming hippies not to give up.

"Because of George W. Bush, 10 million Iraqis still don't have health insurance. 1 million Iraqi seniors still have to pay for their own prescription drugs. 500,000 Iraqi college students can't even afford to go to a decent university", Kerry said.

"If George Bush wants us to believe a sovereign Iraq is better off today than it was under Saddam Hussein, he must think we Democrats are the most idiotic buffoons on the planet", said Kerry.

hahaha. Dirty foaming hippies.

You know kerry used to be a hippie too, right?

har har.

YAY FOR LIBERAL BASHIN!

-Smurfy, the only conservative republican within 6 miles of this blog. Except for that one guy.

And my favorite,

How come I cant find any good MP3's of this.

Smurfy — 2004-09-05T10:09:00-05:00

This is like, the smurfy national anthem.
Sure I can find japanese versions of the flaming lips,

but an american classic rock song.

Ha,

WE LAUGH AT YOU.

IN JAPANESE.

Artist: The Allman Brothers Lyrics
Song: Ramblin' Man Lyrics

(Refrain)
Lord, I was born a ramblin' man
Trying to make a living and doing the best I can
When it's time for leaving, I hope you'll understand
That I was born a rambling man

My father was a gambler down in Georgia
He wound up on the wrong end of a gun
And I was born in the back seat of a Greyhound bus
Rolling down highway forty-one

(Refrain)

I'm on my way to New Orleans this morning
Leaving out of Nashville, Tennessee
They're always having a good time down on the Bayou, Lord
Them delta women think the world of me

(Refrain)

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T09:09:25-05:00

MY STUFF!

MY LAYOUT!

MY PICTURES!

MY MUSSSSIICC

It's all..gone...

;-;...

I fear my mindsay departure shall be quick.

The agony.

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T10:09:39-05:00

So, my question to mindsay idiots.

Why did this have to happen again?

Could I have not recieved fair warningt hat my entire layout and mp3 collection would be deleted because my ENTIRE FREAKING BLOG HAS BEEN RESET?!

Now this is just pissing me off.

Good job, mindsay guys.

Good job.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T12:09:32-05:00

I must appologize to Lee.

Wrong person,

"MY BAD YO"

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T12:09:57-05:00

Fine.

So I can't add background music anymore. I don't ..think...Anyone found someplace on this new layout where you can actually edit the HTML codes n' such?

I'd LOVE to know!

But, you know. I guess...Gah...

I suppose I can live with this, But I wish I'd recieved more warning first.

It's not too bad, I just want my old music.

;-;

The end is UPON US.

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T01:09:10-05:00

I figure I'll have actual posts..or..something..like..LATER.

I'm too busy..recovering now.

And by recovering, I mean I'm lazy.

Spent like, an HOUR on the phone yesterday, and it felt superb.

I think I finaly found it.

^_^

Fine, then let's update.

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T05:09:42-05:00

So I guess I can't whine about this forever.

Time to...MOVE ON..so to speak..

or..a..

I'm just talkin out of the ol' rear end again.

~_^

I do that.

So, fools and mindsay followers, through the course of this journey into uncharted CSS territory, where things don't end with >'s, (or tag's for you...TECHIES..out there..I'm sure theres one or two..) I have discovered that when allowed, making CSS layouts may be a bit tougher then I previosuly assumed. And by tough I mean holy CRAP, I'm actually going to haev to LEARN stuff.

Blasted things.

So I had 5,843 hits before Mindsay killed the HTML.

~_~...

Now I can't COUNT them...;-;...

Man.

So how am I going to amuse my ego now?

HOW?!

I CAN'T, thats right. I CAN'T.

rawr.

So, I guess, after everythings said and done, it really dosent matter if some guy from hickville cans ee how many hits he's gotten on his little BEELAWG.

Beelawg.

Gah.

Anyway, so, um, Today is my "DAY OFF" because it's a "HOLIDAY". You know, Labor day and all that jazz.

So I thought, why not go see Alien Versus Predator today.

Since I'm an idiot, and I havent seen it yet.

Or HERO!

I thought, mindlessly.

After watching "Big Fish" yesterday, and "Tremors", I was aiming for something with alot more...um..stupid people getting killed.

Rawr.

Although I did LIKE Big Fish.

That was one cool/far out/groovy movie right there.

The Dad guy reminded me of myself.

Because I do that..story.."Thing"..sometimes.

But when I do it, that, story thing,

I'm pretty sure theres..no..like..

Moral/cinematic qualities too them.

Most of them just end in:

And thats why (Insert someones name here) is STUPID.

Ah..smurfy..

If I didn't put spaces between every other word, it would look like I didn't have as much,

so just deal with it.

RAWR.

SMURFY!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T06:09:13-05:00

OH SNAP! KEN KENNINGS IS BACK!!!!!!!

testing image html tag

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T06:09:16-05:00

Well,

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T07:09:10-05:00

So if your lonely,

You KNOW I'm here waiting for you,

I'm just a crosshair,

I'm just a shard away from you,

and if you leave here..

You'll leave me broken, shattered, A lie!

I know I won't be leaving here..with..YOU...

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-06T09:09:26-05:00

One of my friends wrote this in a paper about the revolutionary war,

"Many have argued that we can not fight against a military so strong as Britain's. A military is as strong as its soldiers' devotion to the cause, and if we will dedicate ourselves, our passion for independence will serve as our ammunition."-Michelle Cohen

Is that not like, way freakin' groovy?

Michelle roxorz.

GO SHELLY.

GET AN A.

It's just.

"Smurfalicious"-Lizzy Cohee

Or,

"Smurftacular"-Lizzy..Cohee.

See, it's cool, she add's the PREFIX, smurfy, to NORMAL words, and makes ALL NEW WORDS.

Is that not just INSANELY beyond any normal mental reasoning?

I agree.

it is.

And go Michelle.

Man.

I love that quote.

Sounds fishy to me..

Smurfy — 2004-09-07T08:09:25-05:00

So.

I was greeted with the reality that the girl I recently met by the name of "Britini Phillips" is moving back to Pennsylvania after being here since June.

;-;...

I was very saddened by this.

Britini has been such a groovy classmate and all...but..I got her screename, so at least I won't have to deal with her being entirely absent from the life of smurfy.

Other'n that, let's get to the BEEF.

First off, I met a girl who's name was pronounced "Ash-lay".

I hate these STUPID names that parents name kids these days.

STUPID, TERRIBLE, RETARDED.

Ugh.

I informed her that if she wished me to address her, I would not ever be caught saying "Ash-Lay"

To which she replied

"You're a fag"

to Which smurfy responded

"At least my name isn't STUPID."

What ever happend to, say,

Matthew.

or,

Jim.

Now we have

Guys named Michelle,

Some idiot guy I know named Bolt,

this GIRL named ZEPHYR, and..ugh..

Idiots.

I was also once again alerted to the frighting amount of people who have viewed this blog.

Another guy randomly came up to me today, asserting firmly that he had read my blog.

o_O....MMkay! PLZ DRIVE THRU!

Never use that Q key, you know...Right Lizzy?

Gotta wear it in sometime.

Well, after school today we had callbacks for the play..which is of course, Harvey.

Unfortunetelly, I have become alerted to the fact that I am destined for the lead role, the lead understudy role, or no role at all.

Unfortunetelly for me, I don't really want the lead role.

I have a bad habit of not paying attention. I'm sure that could prove DISASTEROUS!

O_O!!

Seriously.

But you know, taking away the boring emoticons,

I have no idea what I'm talking about.

I was sitting in spanish today, 5th period, when I became encircled by a group of "Ghetto" guys.

I heard the word "Nigga" said no less then 14 times in a span of 45 minutes. That just pisses me off. What in GOD'S name was the freakin' civil rights movement about again? Haha, silly smurfy, you forgot that saying "Nigga" is different then saying ""TEH OMG DONT RITE TEH N WERD HERE".

Man does that just piss off my mind.

u_u'.....Anyway.

Quick recap time!

Ken is still winning in jeopardy, I'm still pissed off about names, I'm going to get the lead in a play, against my will, my name is stupid, I can't improv without making references to aquateen hunger force, my names bill, my names not bill, I have an UMBRELLA hat, Callbacks are groovier when you're flirting with upperclass chicks, This is the longest psuedo-paragraph I'll ever write, Mr. clyburn's an idiot, I finally found a freshmen who doesn't suck entirely, the world ended after finding a non-sucking freshmen, I'm neglecting my homework again , and the sky is blue.

Speaking of an umbrella hat, I have one.

I wore it to school today, amidst cries that a gay looking young man with a multicolored umbrella hat might in fact, be retarded.

To which I replied,

I'm not the one getting wet, sucka.

~_^

-Smurfy, whose mouth probably just got him in trouble again.

(According to my observations, I should now have 5,921 hits)

A Play I wrote..for...

Smurfy — 2004-09-07T09:09:42-05:00

I recently remembered this play I had writtena while back.

It's still very funny!

Sorta!

Enjoy!

"May 13, 2004 7:32 AM

The Remote Control Massacre: The play about the movie, that sucked.

CO CO WRITTEN BY AN ACTUAL EVENT

Page 1
THE REMOTE CONTROL MASSACRE

Morgan- Alright, lets start this up. Lee, Dude, I need you to go by the door there-
Sam- How come I don't have a line here?!
Erin- HAHAHA, JOES HERE!
Morgan- Sam, you don't have a line here because your character isn't even in the house yet. Now, Lee, go back over there--
Lacey- This movie SUCKS.
Morgan- Well, dude, it's just a--
Sam- Are you SURE I can't have a line?
Erin- JOES HERE!
Morgan- STOP IT!
Jaclyn- Why do you have to keep YELLING at us?
Sam- He won't give me a line either.
Morgan- Sam, you've had the script for 2 months, you know how many lines you have.
Jason- You're getting leaves on my CARPET.
Lee- Can we just shoot the scene maaaaaan I'm tired'
Jaclyn- Stop WHINING
Erin- JOES HERE! Hahahaha!
Lacey- I'm gonna quit.
Morgan- Alright, everyone, STOP. If we don't get done, I'm not ordering any pizza.
Lee- WOAH! PIZZA?!
Jason- You better not get pizza on my carpet.
Erin- I don't really like pizza.
Lacey- You're ordering breadsticks too. Cause I don't want any piz-
Sam- Can I have just ONE line?
Morgan- SHUTUP Sam. Your lines are coming up..
Sam- Fine I just want one line.
Morgan- You have THIRTEEN lines in the end! And a fight scene! Just wait!
Erin- When do we leave?
Jason- I should have brought my couch We are still using Pokey the Penguin music right? Because I have an idea for that.
Lee- Dude, lets just shoot the movie I need to get some soda after we're done..
Morgan- Alright, Lee, go over there by that door. Now, Erin, when he comes in, yell, ITS MASTER SCAR!! Okay?
Erin- I guess.. but it sounds stupid.
Jaclyn- Just do it so we can leave already.
Sam- Is this where I have a line?
Morgan- NO.. Sam.. NO
Jason- I'm still dead, right?
Sam- How come Jason gets to be dead?
Lacey- This is SO boring.. I'm gonna go look upstairs..
Morgan- hang on, what? No Lacey, you're in this scene man.
Erin- IT'S MASTER SCAR!
Morgan- No! Lee! Not yet! I don't even have the camera ready!
Erin- Haha'what? HAHA! JOES HERE!
Morgan- Erin will you stop saying that line? You only said it ONCE in the script..
Lacey- (mimicking) Only said once, whatever, look, here we go, JOES HERE.
Jason- I have an idea for after I'm dead at Doctor fear's Lab. I was Joe right?
Page 2
Morgan- Yes! Let's shoot this scene though. Now lee, Where the binder?
Lee- The what man?
Morgan- The evil remote thingy.
Lee- Oh yeah, I gave that thing to Jaclyn
Jaclyn- No, No you didn't.
Lee- I LOVE YOU JACLYN!!
Erin- JOES HERE!
Morgan- STOP! Who has the binder?
Lacey- The what?
Morgan- The evil remote!
Lacey- That's a stupid name, and WHY are you yelling at me! You JERK.
Morgan- Well who HAS it?
Jason- has what?
Morgan- The BINDER
Erin- What's TH-
Morgan- THE REMOTE
Erin- Oh yeah, it's right there
Morgan-':sighs:: thank you', Now. Lee, come in yelling about killing Joe.
Erin- JOES HERE!
Jaclyn- SHUTUP
Morgan- ANYWAY When you do Erin's gonna say, MASTER SCAR!!! Then you point the remote at her, then freeze so I can do some camera work, Okay?
Lee- Alright man.. let's do it..
Lacey- Am I dying now?
Morgan- No, you die next.
Lacey- Ugh, Whatever'
Morgan- Okay, on 3.'.one'.two'
Sam- Wait! Do I have a line?!
Morgan- What?
Erin- MASTER SCAR!
Morgan- No! Wait! STOP!!
Sam- What?
Jason- Am I gonna be laying over there, or am I off camera?
Erin- Can I say something else here? I don't like this line.
Jaclyn- Just DO it Erin, I want to go eat'This is so boring.
Lee- Jaclyn! I LOVE YOU!
Morgan- No to everything that anyone said. Now go back Lee'and.. let's go. Camera rolling'one'two.. THREE.
Lee- BWHAHAHAA!!!
Erin- MASTER SCAR!!
Morgan- Okay'.now.. STOP! That's a wrap everyone. Now, only 16 more scenes to go...
Lacey- Good. I quit.
Sam- Not before any of my LINES!
Erin- Joes here!
Morgan- Okay.. well.. we'll finish later. Les go eat
(everyone agrees)
Erin- But I don't even like pizza.
Lee- I LOVE YOU JACLYN!
Morgan- I hate you all.

The End

Number on in da hood, G.

Smurfy — 2004-09-08T10:09:03-05:00

w00tations sirs.

kat is in love with waffle, and I actually made the lead role int he school's fall play, "Harvey".

AIn't that something.

I did something good for once.

I also ntoed the decline in my like of the bus, since these new freshmen got all loud and took over the backseats.

u_u'....

Licensein3months,licensein3months....BREATHE SMURFY...

Bah.

So now, whenever people think of corn, they think of my nonexistent inivisible girlfriend who is allergic to corn.

Or something..

It's the thought that counts anyway, people.

I think there were a few people at school who got kinda ripped about the play though, with the casting. Megan Carol (carroll?) (Caroll?) Should have definetelly gotten a bigger part, along..with..say..brooke..or possibly Brittany, although she's anti-umbrella hat. So I dunno. :::shrugs::

I was told that I could show my movie, ROCKETMAN: THE ULTIMATE HERO in class friday, (My user picture is a screenshot from the movie) and I'm simply going insane waiting for it. Gah. Just to spite me tommorow will go slowly and the world will implode friday morning before theater arts.

So, um...I think..I thinkt hat about covers it.

I think.

I did however, discover that I am in need of an aqua teen hunger force t-shirt

AND SOME OF THOSE STUPID SMURFYS BLOG TSHIRTS.

I realize my blog has expectations to live up too,

to be funny,

to be racist,

to be incredibly moronic,

and to just BE.

I think I failed on all those except the last one there today.

I dunno, I'm just not feeling the groove.

At least Lizzy's gonna read it.

But Lizzy could be flattened by a horse at any time.

Again.

So the moral of todays story is:

If you wear an umbrella hat long enough in the rain, it will kill your mind, and make any blog entries later on in that day suck like a freakin gay guy.

Unless of course,

They suck to the point of funny, like, say,

Day of the dead.

Or Exorcist II, The heretic.

::nods::

Stay groovy, you crazy general blog reading public you.

-GROOOVYSMURFY

What should you calls omeone who's got nothing but an umbrella hat?

Smurfy — 2004-09-09T07:09:46-05:00

Rocketmantommorowmorning,rocketmantommorowmorning,rocketmantommorowmorning...

O_O..

I'm so excited.

And I just can't hide it.

~_^

MWAH.

Anywho.

Today was filled with wonderment.

As I approached the bus this morning, I was saddened by the fact that there was no rain. Which equals no umbrella hats.

Well, ah, you know.

Femi informed us all in 7th period that we had no "tact" (Sensitive mental touch; peculiar skill or faculty; nice perception or discernment; ready power of appreciating and doing what is required by circumstances).

Here is the lowdown.

Smurfy: What is that SMELL.

Ferris: Smells like..gym class...or..clothes..

Christin Stewart: hahahahaha

Smurfy:::makes loud sniffing noises::

Ricahrd: It's not me.

Smurfy: ::stares at richard::

Smurfy: Yeah.

smurfy: It's you sir.

Smurfy: yep. It's you.

Smurfy: makes loud sniffing noises again

Richard: haha. Naw, it's my hair.

((People laugh, including guy-with-red-hair))

Femi: Ugh. SHUTUP.

Guy-With-Red-Har: What?

Femi: I said shutup.

Smurfy: Wha?

Femi: You all lact TACT.

GWRH: Say what? Tact?

Femi: Look it up in the DICTIONARY.

Femi: Actually, you know what, don't.

Christin: hahahahahahaa!

Smurfy: haha, she said tact.

Ferris: Wait, what happened?

Femi: you all should just shutup. That's stupid.

Smurfy: hahaha, she said TACT!

And that was the end of that segment of today.

As you might would imagine,

My life is filled with those scenes. AMAZING IT IS.

On the way home from tutoring, as I was driving, I noticed a car parked at the bottom of the big hill by the old horse farm. As I drove around it I noticed a man who appeared to be taking a piss there, right on the side of the road, onto the car. Around these parts, it's usually normal. We're kinda rednecky.

But not THAT rednecky.

Stupid goats.

We had to buy collars for the goast today, so they could be taken on longer walks. Apparently my parents forgot you don't walk goats.

I hate goats.

I also hate hypocritical morons who expect to give nothing in return for times theyhave been helped.

Suckers.

SMURFY KILLZ U

Anyway.

I was greeted this morning by a girl named Jane-Anne, who'd obviously had too much caffine/sugar. And ### was that cool.

I walked back to my seat, and she's like, dancing int he seat, and goes

"heyyyy theeeereee smurfYYYYYYYYYYYYY"

And I was all

hahaha I LOVE hyper kids!

And then i got hyper and me and jane-anne both pissed off mrs fergusson.

After 15 minutes of us continuslly laughing she says

"I think it stopped being funny about an hour ago guys. ROPE IT IN"

And then Tristan OHL (Ohm?) Started talking about being born in Japan.

Now, none of you know tristan, save for the people who I actually know in rela life.

Imagine the most, incredibly...ugh..acnefied..awkward looking..overbalanced person you know.

Make them worse

And you have tristan.

Poor kid.

well, hes talking in his extremely light death voice about it and says

"I think my birth was probably an accident, because my mother was only over there a short time"

Too which me and Televisionman laughed.

Oh look, my rides here.

More news,

AFTER THE Q.

Long live the Q.

Testin' somethin'

Smurfy — 2004-09-09T07:09:22-05:00

BEHOLD! MY MUSIC RETURNS!

An odd topic to pop up...considerin...

Smurfy — 2004-09-09T08:09:16-05:00

Raining SkyFire: And I hope your neck..um..
Raining SkyFire: gets less.
Raining SkyFire: ::cough::
Raining SkyFire: um..
Raining SkyFire: Weird
Luv2DanceEMC: lol thanx
Luv2DanceEMC: i walked my goat 2day
Raining SkyFire: Cause you get to see my MOVIE
Raining SkyFire: ...
Raining SkyFire: I .a.....u..a..O_O...NO........

After this I hit my head against the desk, because we just bought new goat walking collars.

:sigh:....

;-;

One thing you gotta realize is, we're all rednecks here.

Smurfy — 2004-09-10T11:09:21-05:00

Odd thing it is.

Sitting in the "TOWN SQUARE" (Which is actually circular), and in the middle of "Oliver", the musical, some random drunk guy walks onstage with short shorts and a flashlight, and apparently "Not again" is the catchphrase.

Who knows.

Thats the fun part of our town, gotta tell you.

Yep.

But yesterday, this thing, it keeps ANNOYING me.

I'm sitting in civics, right,

this is the same time femi's TACT fiasco is occuring, but while the room grows silent, I hear a CLICK...((shuffle)) CLICK...((Shuffle))

Then rapid CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK's.

What is THIS?

Our sub is cutting her FINGERNAILS?

with a CLIPPER?!

O_O!

The annoyance.

THE ANNOYANCE.

Hey Ch-CLICK

Why does she keep doin-CLICK

CLICK CLICK

CLICK.

Blast it.

So I showed rocketman in class today!

Everyone was like

"omg d00d thats cool"

Except maybe they spelled words differently

Oh, I can't finisht his.

IM PREOCCUPIED WITH MORTAL KOMBAT AND THE LETTER Q.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-11T12:09:11-05:00

So as we should not forget.

Smurfy — 2004-09-11T01:09:24-05:00

It's still important.

Googlism

Smurfy — 2004-09-11T07:09:55-05:00

The GOOGLISM, for smurfy.

Don't tell me you haven't heard of the googlism. It's been around for like, 3 years now.

http://www.googlism.com

smurfy is
smurfy is what they might yell
smurfy is trusted by
smurfy is a member of the solitary circle club on yahoo
smurfy is damn hott
smurfy is the identity of fatima
smurfy is a great bodyguard and always makes me feel completely safe
smurfy is back
smurfy is the best
smurfy is ranked number 111 and has played for 10h in 14 days
smurfy is the one with all the knowledge and the 3msl chauffeur
smurfy is eating pretzels n> mago0 has left irc
smurfy is away
smurfy is scary
smurfy is to smurfs
smurfy is ranked 124 and has played for 1h in 14 days
smurfy is now known as
smurfy is schedule to perform this summer at teh house of blues
smurfy is ranked 127 and has played for 2h in 30 days
smurfy is the only one who understands me
smurfy is the person who is in charge of the asylum gate and the boot camp gate
smurfy is uncute
smurfy is asking the question in the first place shows clear and unmistakable integrity
smurfy is as smurfy does
smurfy is working on these pages right now

Googlisms for EVERYONE

Smurfy — 2004-09-11T07:09:48-05:00

brooke is sad
brooke is the web queen
brooke is looking pretty
brooke is bored
brooke is best
brooke is getting on my nerves
brooke is changing
brooke is a dog
brooke is nervous about the
brooke is cooler
brooke is missing
brooke is exposed
brooke is silently stunned at the sight of deacon
brooke is a lesbian

skittles is a game that is made from appalachian hard woods that involves knocking down pins by spinning a top through a sort of maze
skittles is the braver of the two
skittles is a carnagasavore
skittles is a bug type of alien with black wings and a green
skittles is paralized from the neck down
skittles is a is old english
skittles is a very unique and inspiring feline
skittles is to win points by knocking over the pins
skittles is a game of nine pins
skittles is a game of ninepin bowls
skittles is one of those toys that will provide your children with years of fun and still look like new when you need to pull it out for grandchildren
skittles is a game that is made from appalachian hard woods that involves knocking down pins by spinning a top through a sort of maze
skittles is the braver of the two
skittles is a carnagasavore
skittles is a bug type of alien with black wings and a green
skittles is paralized from the neck down
skittles is a is old english
skittles is a very unique and inspiring feline
skittles is to win points by knocking over the pins
skittles is a game of nine pins
skittles is a game of ninepin bowls
skittles is one of those toys that will provide your children with years of fun and still look like new when you need to pull it out for grandchildren

jason is god
jason is alive
jason is the happiest he has ever been in his life
jason is judging my camera work
jason is alive? jason is in
jason is awesome
jason is jason vs freddy
jason is that which is
jason is going later this year
jason is a therapeutic super protector and
jason is not
jason is not stupid
jason is a daddy
jason is one of new york city area's most respected
jason is hostile
jason is possessed
jason is still here
jason is a new man"
jason is a buttmuffin

kat is onzindelijk met ontlasting
kat is opgehaald?
kat is not happy
kat is de tijger
kat is
kat is where its at
kat is a brat
kat is weggelopen
kat is furious
kat is daydreaming' by murray perry
kat is my religion
kat is drowning cowboys
kat is you around??? iz left ya a masage at da talk bawd
kat is walking towards me
kat is blah blah blah

walker is ford home page
walker is a long
walker is named brooke teacher of the year
walker is likely to start if he's healthy
walker is all that has moved
walker is named as forest
walker is evolving at defensive tackle
walker is a hit for team
walker is god?
walker is only 'nole to go in first round
walker is heard
walker is dead
walker is colorado's
walker is changing

luc is 13 and eich is 6
luc is not against open space
luc is 13
luc is a group of people who are not interested in preserving open space or promoting quality of life
luc is still around/vermont ecovillage
luc is 1 jaar
luc is het eigenlijk ook geen probleem want
luc is from a dwarven clan in the principality of ulek
luc is focusing more on the f/x
luc is to set up a dynamic and active university education in order to create optimal opportunities for the development of independent
luc is now a flamboyant lawyer
luc is the eldest son who has cast off his knight's armor to be a farmer
luc is not turned on by her vamping
luc is een
luc is "part of the budget electronics family" en verschijnt ook als zodanig op de balans
luc is setting up a network to resist the nazis should germany invade and occupy france
luc is all about
luc is a noted lecturer

chad is shrinking
chad is sacred
chad is a terrible thing to
chad is more than just prevention
chad is confirmed
chad is so hot
chad is here
chad is
chad is the man
chad is stupid
chad is famous
chad is the hottest guy on earth
chad is the patron saint of elections
chad is gay

jeanette is dan ook gewenst en deze krijgt gestalte in een groter verwarmd terras
jeanette is considering plastic surgery
jeanette is returning on may 22
jeanette is pretty much bisexual
jeanette is our grand marshall
jeanette is honored with two stars on the hollywood walk of fame
jeanette is know for her unique physical/emotional approach
jeanette is available worldwide as a speaker
jeanette is raising questions about the practicality of draft new smoke
jeanette is an approved trainer in the danish retriever club and the danish evening school association
jeanette is a graduate student at the university of pittburgh
jeanette is a creature that is native to bloomington
jeanette is gamba timpoera met wasaabi mayonaise
jeanette is the oldest child in a family of 4 and is a godmother to her nieces and nephews
jeanette is an award
jeanette is welcome at any time

brittany is the name of the north
brittany is a friggin slut
brittany is coming up for air
brittany is going down
brittany is born
brittany is accepting entries for july
brittany is a pro
brittany is tired of february 14th
brittany is being deleted"
brittany is back
brittany is a postal worker
brittany is for
brittany is a hearty
brittany is unique
brittany is a happy
brittany is a natural pointer and excellent retriever who makes a great hunting companion

Isn't that just INTRESTING

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-11T07:09:22-05:00

And how are you guys getting that Nominate thing to show up?

Is this some BEST OF MINDSAY trickery?

Yeah sucka, LETS NOMINATE SOME GROOVY STUFF.

Smurfy — 2004-09-12T04:09:14-05:00

SMURFY'S BLOG-WEEKEND UPDATE (Hahaha, I DIDNT steal that from...SNL...FOOL...)

Attention: Everyone whos not an IDIOT

(This means YOU)

(Unless you're an IDIOT)

It has come to my attention that this far out new top blogs thing is all groovy an such,

IT IS MY MISSION TO BECOME THE BEST BLOG IN THE (TEH) WORLD.

OR MINDSAY.

Or some stupid thing like that.

Leaving the sucking up,

So, last night, I was invited to the town scwaure to watch "Oliver" again, but this time with BROOKE. What a groovy night man. So, I arrive at the same time she does, and we take up talking to David. Which is a good thing to do, you know. David's all...david..and stuff. So after David decided he didnt want to watch the play and he went off to do david things, brooke and I traveled off into the distance to sit on the blanket. The one thats tan but not really. And has flowers, but not really. And we WATCHED. Also, I'm pretty sure some other guy was there, but he smelled terrible, then there was amy, and some girl named "Catherine" or maybe it was "Katherine" or maybe it was spelled some way that was more retarded.

At intermission we regrouped with david and trudged to the GAS STATION. Where I bought brooke some "OUCH GUM". I didn't even know they still made ouch gum. it's that..crazy....band aid BUBBLE GUM.

I still can't feel my foot.

and then brooke was all RAWR! ITS FREEZING! and I was all, YES! OPPRUTUNITY TO BE NICE! So I gav her my EXTRA COOL SMURFY SHIRT. The EXTRA extra smurfy shirt.

After that we ran into melanie carivou and stephen uses alot of drugs stephen. Melanie gave me the verbal finger again and when asked if brooke looked cool in my shirt she was all.

"No Comment"

And then steven just talked about being high for a few minutes, then we ran off towards another group of peole, it was BEN. Star wars ben.

After a 5 second awkward hello and a wuick getaway from ben we were free to go....sit down or something.

No more drunk guys. That was cool.

I think thats about all the good stuff. Or at leats the stuff I can make sound halfway intelligent. Haha, just kidding, it's not intelligent. At some point Brooke walked off and I was laying down, and someone went

"SMURFY"

And I awoke to find Erin whatsherface standing over me with a SODA.

And I was all like OH SNAPPPP!

And then we conversed intelligently about math tutors. For 16 seconds or so.

Yet again, before the show started, I kept hearing someone yell

SMURF

SMURFY

IDIOT

DORK

So I'm..kind of puzzled...but then MEGAN CAROLL pops out of nowhere and says hello and then I said something like, Wait..how long has that been going on?

To which she replied, GOTTA GO.

Then ran off!

MYSTERIOUSLY.

But man.

Crazy.

It sort of made up for the fact that I wasn't invited to the emo kids' party. Which I'm sure was just emo. Or maybe something not emo. Heck, I dont know, they watched the texas chainsaw massacre remake. That alone is enough for me to know it was worth missing.

ESPECIALLY FOR OUCH BUBBLE GUM.

But you know, through all this I've learned a valuable lesson all over again.

Fate is SO bipolar, it's BEYOND not funny.

Or ...uhm..no..wait..

No.

I didn't learn anything, sorry, false alarm.

((Crosses his fingers for top blog))

I can't believe I wrote an actual paragraph up there...that's insane...

It's just the power of the Q.

THE Q.

So I walked outside this morning, to feed the dachsund, and I noticed something peculiar near the smurfmobile.

IT WAS A LIMB.

OF A TREE.

And it SCRATCHED MY SMURFMOBILE.

The pain that tree shall SUUUUFFFEEERRRR.

And then, FRIDAY, I managed to step in TWO DIFFERENT types of gum.

From now on the word gum is prohibited on my BEELAWG.

Freakin gum chewers.

I think thats enough of my nonsense.

Anyoen who reads all of this is either bored out of their minds or mentally disabeled. And thats a FACT.

-The only one who can say stupid pointless things about random stuff and have it called funny,

Smurfy

Except for that one guy. I think he can do that too.

Whats his name...like...

WHICH REMINDS ME.

You seen that ad for that new..TALK show..whos doing that...some idiot...gah..I can't remember.....TONY DANZA...

HAHAHA!

If TONY DANZA can get a talk show, I CAN WIN TOP BLOG.

...Tony DANZA?

Tony Danza: ((Unintelligent brooklyn jabber))

Conan O' Brien: KEEP COOL MY BABY!

Tony Danza: OMG LOL CANCELLED

~Smurfy

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-12T05:09:34-05:00

Ah, CRAP.

I killed my bandwidth again.

My theory on addiction

Smurfy — 2004-09-12T09:09:01-05:00

I just realized I've posted everyday since July 12th.

3 months of everyday updates.

I think I have a problem.

hello!

I'm smurfy.

And I'm addicted to my randomly written loosely translated into english..blog..

And I freakin' love it.

MY MIND!

THE PAIN AND JOY!

Irony is the world!

And the world is made of IRON!

AND THE MOON IS MADE OF Y!

hahaha. Smurfy joke.

Smurfy — 2004-09-13T10:09:00-05:00

So there was this guy, right, he's in a rush, and he needs to take a cab.

He hails one and asks him to take him to North street, past downtown.

Sure, the guy says, and they were off.

Now this drive should be short, the distance was only 7 or 8 miles.

I should be there quickly, the man thought.

Now time begun to pass rapidly, and soon 30 minutes had passed.

Does the driver even know where we are? The man thought

Maybe I should ask him...

So the man tapped the driver on the shoulder, and he let out a scream, and RAN off the road!

He went down a hill, and turned sideways, slamming into a tree. After a few minutes, the driver and the passenger crawled out, trying to restore their sanity.

"I'm so sorry about this," The driver said.

"This is my first day on this job. For the last 22 years I've driven a Hearse...."

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN. My mind plays TRICKS on YOU.

Smurfy — 2004-09-13T10:09:36-05:00

So today was mostly groovy, right?

Drama club!

So I'm all, on the board and everything.

I arrive, and the crowd is about 47-50 this time. about 8 people fewer then the time before, but with new people showing up.

So they nominate me for sophomore ...whats-it..hoemcoming rep, and then I somehow manage to win.

And then after that, I find out I'm NUMBER TWO BLOG ON MINDSAY.

Which is pretty hip, you know? I beat out like...Luc. Luc pwnz everything. So I was all.

"Holy SNAP. I got more votes then Luc who PWNZ U ALL?"

And then, too my surprise, I think I did.

Isn't it crazy?

Isn't it just INSANE?!

It sure is smurfy.

it sure is.

Then I heard another good smurfy joke, had some sort of ...refried..CHIKEEN...and realized I was supposed to make a phone call 15 minutes ago.

I am so screwed.

But besides that, um.

Heck.

I don't think anything else happened today.

besides this song jason wrote about byron.

Shoudl I share it?

I THINK I SHOULD!

YOU ARE UNPREPARED FOR WHAT SHALL OCCUR!

Actually, you know what

I'm not, you know why? Because, thats right.

I was supposed to make a phone call 15 minutes ago. But you know,

I'm trying to think of some amazing incredible story. and I had one.

But I FORGOT.

How annoying.

Blast it, I HAD A FUNNY STORY.

CURSE MY MIND AND ITS INABILITY TO WORK!

:;shrugs::

I don't know, today's just one of those days where I just say stuff. Then i quit. Then everyones like,

"OMG LOLZERZ SMURPHE(FEE)(FIY) IS SOOO PHILILILOSPOSHPICAL!:"

Or they say

"Haha. Idiot"

That sort of thing, you know?

I'll make more sense tommorow. I promise.

I mean,

I can't make much LESS.

o_o'....

-Smurfy

(And his subconcious)

RAWR! THE ANSWER TO PIE IS SIX GRAMS OF TUBERCULOSIS!

Smurfy — 2004-09-14T06:09:05-05:00

So I talked to SKITTLES yesterday, and..um..today..yeah..Pretty groovy, you know. Talkin to someone whom you call skittles. At least for me anyway.

At least for ME man.

And on the way to school, with my Smash Mouth, Astro Lounge album in tote, I redisvoered this groovy song

Well here I am at my front door
And oh what an odor is rising
It seems I've stood on this porch at lesser times
Now I've been down the road
You know the one you've dreamed about
And that's surprises you
And I'm sure you'll chalk it up to sell out crime
Home
What do you do when opportunity knocks
When success stalks and along comes fame
Do you open the door or watch in horror
Through the peep hole as they all go away
Lottery or poverty you're a commodity so what's it gonna be
I'm moving on I'm moving on
Home I'm going home I'm going home
Sitting in that same spot
There with the other lot whining
And you know this must be just a mirage
Ain't no doubt I ain't got the clout that's defined by you
But oil stains are all you're gonna find in my garage
Hey whatcha gonna do when the fun stops
When the boat rocks and the crew gets old
Make up your mind it's about time
Because at this time you're staying
Home

I love that one set of lines, there,

What do you do when opportunity knocks
When success stalks and along comes fame
Do you open the door or watch in horror
Through the peep hole as they all go away.

It was like

Oh, MY, a song that SPEAKS to you.

How rare is THAT.

So, on the bus, I saw Seth Christians DAD. How odd. He is tall and lanky, with a slight mullett, kind of like seth. He also has that roseacia thing down.

Oh blast it.

Time to leave.

I HAVE MORE NEWS OF SMURFY.

I THINK.

Resonance.

Smurfy — 2004-09-14T10:09:59-05:00

Tuesday, the fourteenth of September.

A K A YOUR DOOM, STUPID FAT KIDS WHO BREAK IN LINE ( more on that later)

_________________________

I don't quite grasp what all the reminiscence in my head was about, and I'm sure I spelled remininescinemsnese wrong too.

I was riding in the back if my own car, because my parents were all, haha, sucker, you are so not driving, AND YOURE ADOPTED, so I didn't drive.

But then all the sudden I was like

Holy CRAP I'm in high school.

::shrugs::

Been in high school for awhile.

You know.

2 years.

So, I don't quite grasp what hit me all the sudden, but I guess I srot of realized that my childhood was all, bam. It's all in your head now fool, it's SO gone.

I was just thinking about all the people I used to know that I haven't seen in so many years.

there was this old woman whom my dad mowed the lawn for, and did yard work, that stuff.

I was 3 to about 5, and whenever he would go to her house I would always go in, and she would always give me three musketeers bars, and we would talk about how stupid our sisters were.

The last time I saw her, I was 7 years old, and we ran into her at food lion. A few months ago, we ran into her son at a resturaunt, and he said she had gotten alzheimers, and was in anursing home now, at the age of 84. I've wanted to see her for so long now, but her son said that she most likely would have no idea who I was, nor my father, nor anyone else, and that saddend me a bit. But it just..randomly POPPED into my head.

For some reason.

But that let's you know how much mature you've gotten, when you can look back on changes like this, and realize that it's not within your power to change anything like this.

You just have to grow.

::shrugs::

Leaving the stuff that makes sense. You know how much I enjoy that.

Blast it, I was sure I had more then that.

Think...think...think...

OH YES.

But I swear, one day, I'm going to outlaw groups of breaking in line fat kids.

Especially if they are breaking in line.

And they are in clusters.

and they take the good pizza.

Ugh.

SPARE THE BLIND MY FRIEND.

-The one guy who notices that the world is his ranting room

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-14T10:09:25-05:00

Holy CRAP. MINDSAY JUST KILLED MY TWO PAGE ENTRY.

I am going to SCREAM MY BLOODY HEAD OFF.

I think I fixed it...

Smurfy — 2004-09-14T10:09:01-05:00

Tuesday, the fourteenth of September.

A K A YOUR DOOM, STUPID FAT KIDS WHO BREAK IN LINE ( more on that later)

_________________________

I don't quite grasp what all the reminiscence in my head was about, and I'm sure I spelled remininescinemsnese wrong too.

I was riding in the back if my own car, because my parents were all, haha, sucker, you are so not driving, AND YOURE ADOPTED, so I didn't drive.

But then all the sudden I was like

Holy CRAP I'm in high school.

::shrugs::

Been in high school for awhile.

You know.

2 years.

So, I don't quite grasp what hit me all the sudden, but I guess I srot of realized that my childhood was all, bam. It's all in your head now fool, it's SO gone.

I was just thinking about all the people I used to know that I haven't seen in so many years.

there was this old woman whom my dad mowed the lawn for, and did yard work, that stuff.

I was 3 to about 5, and whenever he would go to her house I would always go in, and she would always give me three musketeers bars, and we would talk about how stupid our sisters were.

For some reason.

But that let's you know how much mature you've gotten, when you can look back on changes like this, and realize that it's not within your power to change anything like this.

You just have to grow.

::shrugs::

Leaving the stuff that makes sense. You know how much I enjoy that.

Blast it, I was sure I had more then that.

Think...think...think...

OH YES.

RANTVILLE.

One thing that's always bothered me is people who neglect to say the pledge of allegience at school, or who stand up and just act like idiots.

For example, last year in my buisness class, (1st period, where we always say the pledge) the big jocky senior football players wouldn't say the pledge after about the 3rd week of school. They'd say,

"Sorry coach! (the teacher was a football coach) We gotta save our legs for practice. Can't be pledging you know!"

But then,

ohhhh it BURNS me UP.

FEMI, won't SAY the pledge.

Now it's my personal belief that if you live in America, and you won't say the pledge, you are just a SORRY little fool. So then someone goes, Oh, but you have to say GOD. O_o. Shutup. Shutup. It's the most foolish thing in the world. Last friday, the 10th, after our "SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH MEMORY SPEECH" we were asked to stand for the pledge as usual, and even if you don't think it's worht the effort to make it that big a deal, you know, maybe you should make an effort to say the pledge of allegience anyway. You know? Well I look over at our dear friend Femi, and she's fiddling with a piece of paper and passing a note. o_o. I was all, oh, you foolish little CHILD.

~_~....::puff::

Since then she just stands there gawking at the whiteboard. Not pledging.

That just ANNOYS me.

Then, uh..oh..Shoot..

What else was I going to rant about.

CURSES!

Ohhh YES

I REMEMBER NOW.

So I'm in the lunch line as usual, and this hgroup of fat kids, as usual, is about to break in front of me.

In this group of fat kids, and believe me, I can't stand fat kids who break in lunch lines. Oh, you better believe I can't. In this group of fat kids, there is this one black fellow who wears a hoodie on top of a hat. Some..ball hat or whatever. He usually walks around with a fatter white guy and a fatter other white guy, and another fat black guy.

So today, I built up a "MAKE YOURSELF LOOK LIKE THEY CANT BEAT THE LIFE OUT OF YOU" face, and said,

You stupid FAT FRESHMEN. You are NOT Breaking in front of me TODAY.

Too which the one fat black guy with the hoodie said, and I quote here.

"hahahahaha, I aint not takin your place in line nigga, hahaha, look at this guy, he's all mad, hahaha"

And then the other fat guys broke in line anyway. Then they took the good pieces of pizza. But the fat guy who called me a nigga walked off and got nachos and 4 cookies.

So I was all.

Oh, yeah, stupid fat kid.

Take that.

I WILL TRIUMPH OVER ALL LINE BREAKING FAT KIDS ONE DAY!

I swear, I shall.

And that STILL pisses me off.

Why is it cool to say "NIGGA"?

heck if I know.

I'm just a stupid anrgy nerd.

::shrugs::

But I swear, one day, I'm going to outlaw groups of breaking in line fat kids.

Especially if they are breaking in line.

And they are in clusters.

and they take the good pizza.

Ugh.

SPARE THE BLIND MY FRIEND.

-The one guy who notices that the world is his ranting room

SMURFY

WOOOOOSH!

I think I fixed it...:: Okay, I got it back, but it put some weird white background in for some reason.

Smurfy — 2004-09-14T10:09:32-05:00

Okay, I got it back, but it put some weird white background in for some reason.

::shrugs::

Just ignore it.

Tuesday, the fourteenth of September.

A K A YOUR DOOM, STUPID FAT KIDS WHO BREAK IN LINE ( more on that later)

_________________________

I don't quite grasp what all the reminiscence in my head was about, and I'm sure I spelled remininescinemsnese wrong too.

I was riding in the back if my own car, because my parents were all, haha, sucker, you are so not driving, AND YOURE ADOPTED, so I didn't drive.

But then all the sudden I was like

Holy CRAP I'm in high school.

::shrugs::

Been in high school for awhile.

You know.

2 years.

So, I don't quite grasp what hit me all the sudden, but I guess I srot of realized that my childhood was all, bam. It's all in your head now fool, it's SO gone.

I was just thinking about all the people I used to know that I haven't seen in so many years.

there was this old woman whom my dad mowed the lawn for, and did yard work, that stuff.

I was 3 to about 5, and whenever he would go to her house I would always go in, and she would always give me three musketeers bars, and we would talk about how stupid our sisters were.

For some reason.

But that let's you know how much mature you've gotten, when you can look back on changes like this, and realize that it's not within your power to change anything like this.

You just have to grow.

::shrugs::

Leaving the stuff that makes sense. You know how much I enjoy that.

Blast it, I was sure I had more then that.

Think...think...think...

OH YES.

RANTVILLE.

One thing that's always bothered me is people who neglect to say the pledge of allegience at school, or who stand up and just act like idiots.

For example, last year in my buisness class, (1st period, where we always say the pledge) the big jocky senior football players wouldn't say the pledge after about the 3rd week of school. They'd say,

"Sorry coach! (the teacher was a football coach) We gotta save our legs for practice. Can't be pledging you know!"

But then,

ohhhh it BURNS me UP.

FEMI, won't SAY the pledge.

~_~....::puff::

Since then she just stands there gawking at the whiteboard. Not pledging.

That just ANNOYS me.

Then, uh..oh..Shoot..

What else was I going to rant about.

CURSES!

Ohhh YES

I REMEMBER NOW.

So I'm in the lunch line as usual, and this hgroup of fat kids, as usual, is about to break in front of me.

So today, I built up a "MAKE YOURSELF LOOK LIKE THEY CANT BEAT THE LIFE OUT OF YOU" face, and said,

You stupid FAT FRESHMEN. You are NOT Breaking in front of me TODAY.

Too which the one fat black guy with the hoodie said, and I quote here.

"hahahahaha, I aint not takin your place in line nigga, hahaha, look at this guy, he's all mad, hahaha"

And then the other fat guys broke in line anyway. Then they took the good pieces of pizza. But the fat guy who called me a nigga walked off and got nachos and 4 cookies.

So I was all.

Oh, yeah, stupid fat kid.

Take that.

I WILL TRIUMPH OVER ALL LINE BREAKING FAT KIDS ONE DAY!

I swear, I shall.

And that STILL pisses me off.

Why is it cool to say "NIGGA"?

heck if I know.

I'm just a stupid anrgy nerd.

::shrugs::

But I swear, one day, I'm going to outlaw groups of breaking in line fat kids.

Especially if they are breaking in line.

And they are in clusters.

and they take the good pizza.

Ugh.

SPARE THE BLIND MY FRIEND.

-The one guy who notices that the world is his ranting room

SMURFY

WOOOOOSH!

Attention!

Smurfy — 2004-09-15T06:09:35-05:00

Well, hang on there ma'am!

I am not only suggesting that you quit calling me 'chipmunk', but that you refrain from reminding me of my terrible jokes!

You're a terrible sub ma'am!

BLAST IT

Smurfy — 2004-09-15T06:09:11-05:00

Why on God's green earth can't these IDIOTS just say the word JAGUAR right.

IT'S NOT JAGYUAR.

ITS JAGWAWR

Good HEAVENS.

You IDIOT car IDIOTS.

Just say it RIGHT.

ONCE.

PLEASE!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-15T09:09:45-05:00

Ah.

What a day.

<, homework> Ignore <,/homework>

I'm pretty sure I'm losing at least a full letter grade for updating.

But hey, why not!

So, why is that again

Smurfy — 2004-09-15T10:09:29-05:00

It starts simple, but then, by the time you realize whats going on,

BAM

You totally just got screwed over by a rain cloud.

Don't forget, Sky Captain and the World of Tommorow comes out fridays, fools.

it's way...uhm..

Green screenish.

BUT WITH AN ART DECO STYLE.

Or something, I really have no idea.

So, today I was presented with the fact that saying B.C., as in the time period, is now politically incorrect.

You know what.

I no longer have words to express my dislike of buerocratic foolishness.

Well, now that "Before Christ", is now "Before Common Era", I ask to myself what the will do with A.D., for anyone with any knowledge knows that A.D. is latin for anno Domini, which means "In the year of our Lord"

Unless, of course, it's AIR now, or, After Idiots Ruled

My english teacher said B.C. was "too Christian".

o_o

Mmm'ky. thnx plz drv thru =====>

Idiots.

Also, I got my lunch before the stupid fat kid gang today.

Also, along with THAT, I took the last piece of pepperoni pizza, and then the fat kids, who were after me today, got mad about it.

"Sorry!" I said with glee,

"I guess you'll just have to stop being so FAT"

Of course I whispered that part, since I value my life more then my pizza.

Sometimes.

I just sort of walked outside and ate under a tree since I couldn't find any place to sit witht he odd hanes children who often talk about eating celery.

I don't enjoy talking about eating celery.

I was also alerted to the fact that I may miss more of Kat's basement then previously thought.

If there's one thing that makes me mad it's missing kat's basement.

::shrugs::

I did manage to get a tape of the party that I wasn't invited too.

Now that was some crazy stuff.

CRAZY stuff.

"You're KILLING the space time continum"

"Yep. Sure am"

:;Continues filming::

"we NEED that"

"We sure do Byron"

::keeps filming::

ah.

Crazy stuff.
Crrrrrrrazzzzzzy stuff.

Olê!

So, groovy children,

so.

Yep.

Jarrod Bailey, the kid whos like a freshmen, only with more retardation, but sophomoric, had his pet squirrel takne away. Ha.

His aprents made him give it to some animal care place.

Don't see how it lived.

For the last 2 days he had just been carrying it in his pocket.

See, the thing is

Jarrods kind of gay.

Yeah, you know how it is, AND HOLY SNAP.

I'm looking at my BUDDY list and 17 PEOPLE are signed on, everyone in a whole CATEGORY, and NONE of them have an away message on.

It's like, 1999 again!

Boy do I miss the days before they invented away messages.

I hate those things.

The entire purpose of them is not to put them on, then go away for 12-19 days, then come back and put a new one on complaining because only 2 people IMed your last one, and they were both advertising "SEXY WEBCAMS" and "FREE VIAGRA WITH 17.99 SHIPPING"

And you KNOW I'm right.

Also...uh..Oh, shoot.

I guess I'm out of things then.

Pleasure speaking to you tonight,

-Smurfy (And his mind of DOOM)

And then, after that, THERE WAS PEPPERONI

Smurfy — 2004-09-16T07:09:35-05:00

You know what definetelly sucks?

Being a third wheel.

LAME.

I re-found my invitation for kat's basement.

Yeah.

I'm pretty sure not much happened today, except for a few things earlier this morning.

me and Jane-Anne, as per normal, acted like idiots in Mrs. Fergussons class, because horse woman is a dork.

Even if we did have a sub.

She's still a dork.

It involved a good deal of paper throwing, random spazzing, throwing more paper, and Jane-Anne's shirt having problems.

I won't get into that.

::nods::

So, Ken Jennings is still around.

DONT YOU FORGET IT EITHER.

freakin..jeopardy..BEAST...

Also, during theater, we played an improvy kinda game we hadnt done in a while

"Smile" it's called

The point is, to not laugh while someones trying their best to make you laugh while doing stupid funny things whil saying

SMILE IF YOU LOVE ME

Ha.

So I had the unfortunette occurance of getting picked by ahsley bowman. It's sort of hard not to laugh around ashley. She's sort of annoying like that.

Stupid laughing.

So she strutted over to me like a chicken, stuck out her teeth and said JEEEE WIZZZ GOLYY! SMILE IF YOU LOVE ME!, but I had already given up.

Then it was MY TURN.

Now, as most of you don't know,

I'm sort of funny outside of this stupid blog,

So I just stood there for a second to see how many people I could get to laugh without doing ANYTHING, and that number came to 8.

So I walked over to above mentioned Jane-Anne, and started to do some form of singing, but she couldnt even stop laughing at the start so I had to find someone else.

AHA, I thought,

Miss Sarah Kate Matthews.

::GRIN OF DOOM::

So, I walked over to Kate.

Kate, BABY, I said, Honey, if you love me, I got in her face and winked various times, You will SMIIIIIIIIIILLLEEEEE (Some sort of opera thing). Then she laughed.

I win! Whee!

And it sort of ended after that.

::shrugs::

You know how it is with these improv games.

Also, during lunch, I sort of had to not stop walking, because I couldn't find any place where I didn't feel all

3rd wheelish.

Guah.

You know those days, where no amtter who you talk too, you're just so....unneccesary to any form of conversation, you just feel like you're annoying everyone else.

Tsk tsk!

I'll update with more nonsense after I go eat some artery blocking, heart killing, powerful salt coated concession stand food.

-SASASASASAAAAAAMURFY

I LIKE! I LIKE!

Advice

Smurfy — 2004-09-16T10:09:17-05:00

One would be WELL advised not to challenge Lizzy Cohee to an inuendo war at 10:30.

She is a BREAS-I MEAN BEAST of innuendoic proportions.

Man, That was one good innuendo war.

Poor website.

Poor santa!

BUT MY EYES! MY EYES LIZZY! MY EYES!

Hmm

Smurfy — 2004-09-17T07:09:55-05:00

"Go out and check the goats"

"It's raining!"

"I know, go make sure they aren't drowning or something"

"Goats don't drown"

"But you will, if you don't go check the goats"

"I hate our goats"

"And they love you. GO CHECK THE GOATS"

"I hate our goats"

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-17T11:09:40-05:00

Once upon a merry land there was a lad named smurfy

Smurfy did some crazy things and invented a new blog

This blog! he said, shall make the world go crazy!

For blogging was and should ever be

the grooviest of all,

the fun stuff man,

But then he HATCHED the plan

I'll ruin their thoughts, and make them dumb, with my incomplete sentences!

Followed by 16 empty lines, he knew their doom would come

unfortuentelly it stopped sounding cool and thens ome goats came ina nd then john kerry was like HAHAHA 87 BILLION DOLLARS and then his arm fell off and his face began to melt and it was discovered that he was actualyl fran drescher.

Merry christmas.

JUST EXPLAIN IT!

Smurfy — 2004-09-17T11:09:18-05:00

So, after that delightful encounter with the jpged kind, I realized that today of all days, must be a friday.

A friday!

That means tommorow is not friday.

Becuase today is.

Or...maybe it isn't.....

o_O

Dude, shutup.

Alright, moving on, you know,

to the stuff that doesn't make sense.

So I was like, IN CIVICS, you know?

The class with the retarded middle aged black man who enjoys flirting with young white teenage girls/anyone who will look him in the eye.

So, we're sitting there, and, you know, smurfy's had too many airheads, and I just start on some political commentary while we're working on some worksheet thing.

I'm pretty sure that I did some arnold swchacarzzenegzzaeger, john kerry, a little george bush, and alot more arnold.

I got so ...umm.."Into" doing arnold that I just began pounding on ym desk and shouting four more years for about 5 or 6 seconds...

I think most of the people were just laughing because I'm such an idiot.

The others were laughing because it was funny,

and the other were laughing because I spit my toothpick out.

::shrugs::

"there's a bug on this spoon"

and LIZZY.

You're innuendo skills will CRUSH you.

CRUSH YOU.

So after civics, of course, I had the "Ride the bus home class"

I sort of did the same routine except in front of the pot smoking freshmen.

Man I hate those freshmen.

so, once again, school pictures were dleayed, but not before we got to hear about TORNADOS from mr TELFORD.

Students..and,..teachers......UMMMMMMMMMMMMM......etc. etc.

Of course, after he talked for 20 minutes, math was over. w00tations.

Saved by the annoying irritating voice of the man who hates cleavage, Mr. Telford.

And how.

After that, we were informed standing outside may result in your immediete death, followed by being escorted INSIDE...

where the DOOM WINDS didnt wait for your DOOM!

Oh..and..uh..

Something about

MMMMGOOD.

::shrugs::

I gotta start writing these things down, I forget all the good stuff byt he time I remember to update.

Or MAYBE, it's not ME thats forgetting, it's the BLOG.

MAYBE ITS A CLONE OF ME OF MY BLOG

Conspiracies abound

-Smurfy. (It's way past too late to make sense)

Ranomd QUIPS and QUOTES

Smurfy — 2004-09-18T12:09:49-05:00

Hilzarie:

Anyways.... yeah I got on campus from my excursion to Cookout and the movie theatre (which didn't open til one so we couldn't get our tickets) we found a spot in first lot (HA!) and went to go to lunch and McVicker was like "HURRY UP KIDS! GET IN A BUILDING, WHAT CLASS ARE YOU GOING TO!??!!?" "Um.....math.......that building *point*" OKAY, GO IN THERE, THERE ARE STRONG WINDS, NOT A TORNADO YET, BUT THEY'VE BEEN PICKING STUFF UP AND BLOWING THEM DOWN THE BREEZEWAY!! DON'T TRIP IN YOUR NICE BOOTS!" I was like ".....wow......... these silly southerners ^.^"

I love tornadoes, I've been in about twenty seven of them that I can remember, and I've gotten to the point that I just stand on my deck and watch until I can tell it's close enough to project something at me or blow me away. Hurray for Michigan, the top of Tornado Alley!!! In my AP Art class the people were all like "OMG WE'RE GONNA DIE!! LOOK, THE RAIN! IT IS STOPPING! IT WAS ALL PRETTY AND NOW IT'S STOPPING!!" "Um......yeah........ no tornado, the sky would be green....... and we'd hear a sort of train-like noise and it would get really warm (which we couldn't tell cause we were in the classroom but sh) and the sinks would funnel and stuff like that. It just stopped raining -.-"

I'm going to stop this comment now......LONGEST COMMENT EVAR! YAY!! hehe

Lucas Talks Star Wars TV Series
Wed, Sep 15, 04 04:40:47 PM EDT The AP has an interesting interview with George Lucas online. Here's a highlight:

AP: After "Episode III," will you ever revisit "Star Wars"?
Lucas: Ultimately, I'm going to probably move it into television and let other people take it. I'm sort of preserving the feature film part for what has happened and never go there again, but I can go off into various offshoots and things. You know, I've got offshoot novels, I've got offshoot comics. So it's very easy to say, "Well, OK, that's that genre, and I'll find a really talented person to take it and create it." Just like the comic books and the novels are somebody else's way of doing it. I don't mind that. Some of it might turn out to be pretty good. If I get the right people involved, it could be interesting.

Lucas Says No More Films
Tue, Sep 14, 04 03:02:57 AM EDT Eddie points out MTV's website for some great Lucas quotes about the end of the Star Wars films and the rating of ROTS:

"This was never planned as a nine-episode work," Lucas said. "The media [pounced when] I made an offhand comment, 'It might be fun to come back when everyone's 80 and do another one of these.' But I never had any intention of doing that."
Lucas said he only decided to do the back-story trilogy — which "Sith," due next May, will cap — because he realized he had already written it in order to tell the story in the first "Star Wars" films. "The original 'Star Wars' was only three films, and that was what it was meant to be," he said. "After a lot of pondering and thought, I went back to do the back story, but that pretty much tells the story. Episode six is the end. There isn't any more to it."
"Sith" may mark the end on an emotional level, too. "All the good guys die," he said, laughing. "And you know, it's pretty dark. It's pretty intense. I'm not sure this one is going to end up a PG like the others were."
That apparently doesn't have so much to do with actual violence — like previous "Star Wars" films, this one will have lots of battles and space action — as with what happens to Padme and the children borne from her union with Anakin Skywalker following their escape and separation. "It's a happy story," Lucas joked.

EP3: Threepio Completes SW Shoot
Tue, Sep 14, 04 02:44:34 AM EDT John points our the BBC website for a clip of Anthony Daniels reaction to Star Wars feature filmmaking being forever completed.

"Oh yes, it was with tears. This was very much a fond farewell," he said.
He admits director George Lucas' fascination with special effects had overtaken storytelling in later films.
"For the final shot I walked along a blue corridor with a blue background behind me talking to someone who wasn't there." he said.

I found a really weird yet cool sounding mix of Ballroom blitz.

This is mildly disturbing.

TURN UP YOUR SPEAKERS.

The party: an analysis

Smurfy — 2004-09-18T11:09:24-05:00

Well.

It began simply enough.

I arrived roughly 5 or 6 seconds before steph, and immedietelly began making fun of her and dared her to beat me to the house.

Luckily I was standing right in front of it, so, of course, I won.

As I entered, I met the mysterious silent girl known as Stella.

I think I didnt make too good of an impression. Pretty sure.

::shrugs::

After that, Emily avocado holloway showed up. At that point I sort of stole the spinny chair and immedietelly began the campaing known as READ KATS BOOKS

Exciting indeed.

Soon following was Walker, whom was quite groovy. I think he cut his hair some, maybe I'm just confused.

It was awkward for just a second, but then Jasona rrived, and it sort of stayed awkward.

But then, of course, every party has to have the stupid annoying guy who disagrees with everyone I do, and for that we have somebody named Ian I guess.

It was his fault we started talking about politcs.

Darn those politics.

After that he informed us all that president Bush paid terrorists to attack the US so he would look "cooler".

To which I said,

John kerry looks like herman MUNSTER you IDIOT.

Then, while we were talking about lord of the possums, I brought up the fact that the one scene they shot looks like that classic "Bigfoot" footage.

Then this guy said

"Dude that's not real. THATS FAKE"

u_u'.....

Sir, you're an idiot.

He then informed us that bigfoot was real, but the footage was not.

So, hey.

Go man go.

Idiot.

And then after we hit stefpahanahayaaie with some branches and TWIGS, she broke/sprung/pretended to break/spring her ankle, and demanded that I piggy back her.

Worked GREAT until she decided to SUCK at doing that.

Then I just FELL.

TWICE.

Of course Kat had no problem doing it because she LEANED UP then.

Instead of just being STUPID.

And making me FALL.

~_~

And then she broke my HAND during the MOVIE.

yeah, sucka.

Thats right.

I said MOVIE.

So we watched the twin peaks movie, which proved further that the 90's ruled.

Awesome 90's.

Yeah.

Then same idiot wanted to use the quija board when scary movie 3 was on.

Why waste a perfectly good movie on a stupid quija board.

needless to say, I didn't bother with it, because I was too busy acting like an idiot and making stupid jokes, like I usually do during a movie that seems to suck.

Take, the ring for example.

That was one nonstop bad joke fest for me.

Because it sucked.

That's right,

The Ring, it SUCKED.

LIKE VAN HELSING.

OR EXCORCIST II THE HERETIC THE MINISERIES THE MOVIE

Spare the BLIND.

And skttles, my deduction skills pwned you.

Deal with it.

Sucka.

-SMURFY

Whats in that pie?

Smurfy — 2004-09-19T08:09:27-05:00

Could it be a false tooth?

Or is it more likely that the turnip's belong only in france with King mike.

Boondoggle

Smurfy — 2004-09-19T10:09:42-05:00

Well, guys.

Today's one of those messed up days where nothing happens and you see twelve OMG LOL NOTHIN HAPENED 2DAY AND OMG MY MOM IS ACTUALLY A LIZARD or something like that.

::shrugs::

Well, since we have that taken care of, let's start making something up.

Let's Rock!

Boondoggle- An unnecessary or wasteful project or activity; To waste time or money on a boondoggle.

So, for now and forever, this shall furthermore be called a Boondoggle of ULTIMATE proportions....I think.. And is Boondoggle now the COOLEST word you have EVER heard. I didn't even MAKE UP that one.

Example

"I tried to read Smurfy's blog, but it was a boondoggle, his entire vocabualry consists of stupid, LOLZERZ, KILLZ U, and groovy."

I tried to use the word boondoggled, but it boondoggled when I accidentily said moondoggy.

Oh screw this, I lost my mind back when I said your mom was a lizard.

My my. MY DOOM IS UPON YOU

Smurfy — 2004-09-20T08:09:33-05:00

Practice, 6-8, every day except friday from now until december.

My head hurts and all's we're doing is READING.

My WORD what has Elwood and Harvey got me into.

Don't expect many updates now.

Seriously,

But stay groovy children.

I SHALL BE WAITING

(Overly dramatic)

(Drama queen)

(DORK)

My Cd player, or, in english, &#^@&!!^#@&@!...

Smurfy — 2004-09-20T11:09:23-05:00

Okay.

I get on the bus, I turn on my CD player.

it doesn't work.

I turn it off, back on, back off, back on, for 45 minutes.

It never works.

After school, waiting for practice to start,

Doesn't work.

On the ride home in the truck,

Doesn't work.

Get home, lay on the bed, accidentily hit the play button.

Works perfectly.

::sigh:::

Why is fate SO, FREAKING BIPOLAR.

And why does it hate me!

HATE ME SO!

I also realized, that along the lines of the play (Harvey),

I am utterely and beyond all recognition,

Screwed.

My second line, of course,

Is a 1.5 page monologue in which I have no interaction with anyone except for the imaginary telephone operator.

o_o.

Curse you Elwood P Dowd.

CURSE YOU.

Of course, in the 3rd act, I realized I get kissed by the nurse.

~_^

Nevermind.

Gonna freakin' rock, sucka's.

And my friends, this is the best microsoft joke I've ever seen

Fear the truth.

My anti-drug.

or...uh..

::shrugs::

Stupid ad campaigns.

Blast it!

I had something I was going to write in this thing, which I've been thinking about all day!

I must have gotten distracted by the hole in brooke's leather pants.

Or maybe it's brittany's french fries, which are still hot by the way.

And, I''m pretty sure that I may miss an update soon.

Mon-Tuesday I have practice from 6-8

Wed-Thursday I have prac. from 6:30-8:30

Couple that with 1 & 1/2 hours of homework, this stupid biology project due thrusday I haven't started, my ability to make a big deal of small things,

and VOILA!

You have one mentally retarded (even more so then usual), Smurfy.

My freaking EYES.

MY EYES.

-Smurfy.

Oh, won't someone please just KILL these freaking GOATS.

( star wars DVD's come out tommorow! YESSSS!)

Well, isn't that just DUCKY.

Smurfy — 2004-09-21T04:09:35-05:00

http://www.mindsay.com/live

Well, my mindless zombie blog reading friends.

...

Yeah, that's about it.

So I got a few pictures today.

like.

19 pictures.

HAHAHA.

Fools.

So, Jarrod got beat up by freshmen and sam again.

Good times my friend, good times.

When you turn into a massive belching bag of acne that makes things difficult to look at, who usually drags dead squirrels around in pockets, you may get beat up too.

MMhmmmmm

I did manage to sleep through spanish without getting caught!

That was groovy!

Um...

Crap.

I had FUNNY things to say.

I keep frogetting....all the funny stuff..

Oh yes!

The subject came up of snowballs, SOMEHOW or another in my civics class, which led to me re-telling the story of how I was thrown through that window last year.

my WORD I love that story.

It CAPTIVATES audiences WHENEVER I tell it.

It's often how I warm up at a party with new people,

because every SINGLE person who went to west last year knows about that.

IT'S CRAZY!

After that, I had to leave for practice.

HARVEY practice.

(ZE PLAY!)

Adios my good friends, and the ones who aren't, and stalkers, like skittles.

-SMURFY

My Doom, on a platter

Smurfy — 2004-09-21T10:09:24-05:00

So, I hear a ringing in theater class today.

I look over, and Lizzy's just writing on a picture, and her and Alli are laughing, and LOOKING at me!

This is a pretty common occurance, but after seeing Lizzy get up with the picture, and what else, ..whats that in her HAND...

It was the demon lepruchaun doll from 9th grade.

The one I stabbed.

And it's back.

Luckily I had the sexy picture of Lizzy to take my mind off the fact that the demonic one-eyebrowed death doll in my backpack.

Also in my favor was Alli's mischievious nature, which cursed her to pick up the doll and carry it around.

She was a good person, Alli.

Poor thing.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-22T05:09:24-05:00

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-22T05:09:30-05:00

Mindsay ate my entry.

And the 6 person bus fight Mega-Brawl® proved that Jarrod's only means of attack is laying on people.

Jarrod,

ugh...

What a tard.

Good fight, suckas

MMMMMMMMMMM.......

Smurfy — 2004-09-22T10:09:32-05:00

I tried to think of some witty entry,

but my head got the better of me.

I'm feeling far too logical right now to write in this wonderful piece of human art.

Eh.

I HATE that freaking THIRD WHEEL feeling.

My WORD does it SUCK.

< teenage angst> KILL

You know,

Smurfy — 2004-09-22T11:09:23-05:00

You see,

There's on thing thats caught my eye recently.

This stupid thing,

And I'm full of these pet peeves,

But why does EVERY profile I look at have to have

I love JIM

I love LINDSAY

<3 Tom

OMGZ LUVIN U MINDY!

ilu jeff

and then they put the DATE

THE DATE

THE DATE THEY WENT DATING

ON AIM PROFILES.

You know,

If I wanted to know that you weren't single

I would have asked.

Instead, I have 120 people reminding me that I'm the only single person on my buddy list.

and to that, I say

What a LAME thing to do.

GO announce your love for annoying me in more sincere ways, like hitting me in the face. At leas I could dodge it.

theres no dodging OMG LOLZ IM DATING SAMANTHA!

14-292-1990!!!!!! OMGZ!

Smurfy has spoken

And ranted

And whined

AND OH JUST KILL IT ALREADY

-Smurfy's blog (That one day it wasn't funny)

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-23T04:09:54-05:00

Oh, so I got in a bad mood ONE time.

ONCE.

ONE TIME.

And for that Byron announces my DOOM via DOOM TEXTS.

I've got picture you need to see Byron.

It's me at age 7 winning Mortal Kombat with raiden.

Age 7.

You know what that means?

ITS TEKKEN TIME.

Aprreciation to the groovin's

Smurfy — 2004-09-23T09:09:27-05:00

I realized that today was thursday, and as such, was dissapointed, see, because I thought today was friday, when I woke up.

For...some reason.

::shrugs;::

Which just means that the 2nd project I thought I had to do yesterday was in fact, not due yesterday. How I loathe it.

I was walking around at lunch today, as usual, aimlessly, because see,

the thing about me is, I've gotten to understanding,

Is that I know tons and tons of people, but I don't necessarily Fit IN with any of them. I'm so extremely introverted about my affairs and thoughts, that I don't feel any social gratification by becoming any closer to anyone, other then the common blah blah blah of everyday life.

...

Sorry, I'm getting too intelligent for my blog again.

I do that from time to time.

But don't worry.

I'm too much of a spaz to keep track of thsoe good thoughts.

LIKE PASTA.

POSSESSED PASTA....

........

Ah.

So today we got our homecoming ballots.

Too which I immedietelly pondered,

"How on God's green earth did Tristan Ohl make it on here"

Too which someone asked me,

Why the heck are YOU on here, smurfy.

Too wich I replied

YOUR MOMMA, SUCKA.

::shrugs::

I've been sitting around trying to write down more movie ideas lately, but I am so blocked.

Last time I got inspiration, it was from watching old silent movies, but now..it's like..

Hey! First theres a guy who finds gold! THEN ZOMBIES!

and then,

There's this guy, and he gets married to this siberian supermodel,

THEN ZOMBIES!

And then,

First theres zombies,

THEN ZOMBIES!

So I'm thinking,

Maybe the reason I can't write anything else, is because I need to write a ZOMBIE movie.

So I tried that.

That was GARBAGE.

I mean Garbage that makes Gigli look like The Emipre Strikes Back.

Yeah.

That kind of garbage.

Which reminds me that I still don't have the DVD's.

Curse my inability to reason with price tags.

CURSE IT ALL!

But, since I arrived at play practice relatively early, I was able to spend a little time with Brooke and Brittany.

Ya'll are two of the grooviest people I know, and I appreciate all that you two do. make alot of ungroovy days totally far out, man.

Isn't that just sweet smurfy?

Oh yes.

Sure is.

HAHAHAHA JUMPING TO ENDGAME

(Also the smurfmobile needs gas)

(And I'm to cheap to buy any)

(And brakes)

(and tires)

(and $)

-Smurfy

Good LORD do we need 3 weekends instead of 2...

UGH..

-Seriously, it's smurfy

Smash Mouth ROXORZ

Government test climate best
If you're looking for no rest
And at midnight you can grab your keys
And slip into your bulletproof dress
Television comes to life
And it works the street tonight
Siren's the song and it's remixed long
Into the broad daylight
Sleeping with the only one you can't out run
Gotta run before the sun catches up to me
Days they go too slow I'm blinded

Seein' only what I wanna see
In this enchanted land of a thousand chances
You only get just one and it's gone

Well I'm just another creep
In that town that never sleeps
Met the one I adore at a liquor store
And she gave up counting sheep
And she explained to me
What "waitress" really means
That most ignore what she's waiting for
While earning an honest keep
She's acting out tinsel town's most-hated scene

Gotta run before the sun catches up to me
Days they go too slow I'm blinded
Seein' only what I wanna see
In this enchanted land of a thousand chances
You only get just one and it's
Gone

Disenchanted in this land of a thousand chances
You only get just one and it's
Gone

I figured it out

Smurfy — 2004-09-24T04:09:24-05:00

Finally, after much debate, the next movie I make is most likely going to entitled

STREETS OF RAGE:

RUMBLIN' RAGIN'
POLITICIANS

Which is just going to be me in different hats doing my RPC imitiations for like, 15 minutes.

Then a random fight breaks out, which ross perot stops.

Ross perot is your doom!

I was basically doing those for 10 or so minutes until my sub for civics said

hey, Kung foo man

Wha?

I said

No, I'm doing shwarzheneggar

"No man,....No....Your t-shirt.

And you're too loud. We're trying to watch a MOVIE"

Too which I replied, (without quotes)

DRAGONS AR NOT KUNG FOO..

THEY ARE ...

ASIAN.

DD.....R?!

Smurfy — 2004-09-25T03:09:09-05:00

Okay, so, I did it.

I finally did it.

I played DDR for the first time and discovered my inner groove.

So what IS the answer sir.

Smurfy — 2004-09-26T01:09:23-05:00

Well,

Mighty fine day isn't it?

yeah, it sure is.

No, I'm lying.

HAHA NO! I tricked you!

::shrugs::

Well, it seems like it's been a slow weekend, but those always come back to slap you in the face. I realized that the fair starts friday, and that this year, going to the fair is going to suck a little more then it did last year. For one thing,

A) No one is GOING to the fair this friday,

B) I have been assured that there's no way I'm going to be able to avoid having to walk around with my idiot ghetto preppy sister this year,

C) My sister's friends are gehtto preppy idiots as well,

D) No ones GOING to the fair this friday.

Not that I've asked anyone.

BUT HEY.

Eh.

So after all that mess, we have to come to subject DOS.

Not like, the operating system. But,

TWO.

Oh wait

pizzas here

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-26T03:09:38-05:00

The ocean breathes salty.

So, after all that pizza and whatnot, I realized one thing for sure

Re-heated hamburger pizza sucks.

REGULAR hamburger pizza sucks, what am I going on about.

No idea...

Not enough has happened this weekend to rant about, you know? Gotta have some....CONTROVERSY.....or..

Oh screw it.

I don't even have anything to rant about man. Nothing.

NOTHING.

I am going to load some new pictures though.

Stay tuned for brand new DOOM!

SUBJECT!

Smurfy — 2004-09-26T03:09:43-05:00

The ocean breathes salty.

So, after all that pizza and whatnot, I realized one thing for sure

Re-heated hamburger pizza sucks.

REGULAR hamburger pizza sucks, what am I going on about.

No idea...

Not enough has happened this weekend to rant about, you know? Gotta have some....CONTROVERSY.....or..

Oh screw it.

I don't even have anything to rant about man. Nothing.

NOTHING.

I am going to load some new pictures though.

Stay tuned for brand new DOOM!

SUBJECT 2 I MEAN TWO I MEAN OH SNAP POP TARTS!

Smurfy — 2004-09-26T03:09:02-05:00

I had some terrible pageload problems, but I believe I fixed them.

Badnwitdh, you know?

Oh wait, sorry.

I was just informed that I'm still having bad page-load problems.

That's probably those stupid GOATS' fault.

FINALLY

Smurfy — 2004-09-26T09:09:02-05:00

I finally got pictures from that freakin' party up.

Rejoice, suckas.

http://www.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewPicture&friendID=3564952&friendName=Smurfy&Mytoken=20040926205437

Conan- He shall RULE

Smurfy — 2004-09-27T10:09:55-05:00

NEW YORK(AP) NBC chose the 50th anniversary of the "Tonight" show on Monday to announce that Jay Leno will be succeeded by "Late Night" host Conan O'Brien in five years _ or thousands of jokes from now.

The unusual succession plan solves a delicate problem for NBC, blocking other networks from poaching O'Brien to move him to an earlier time slot.

Leno planned to make the announcement on Monday's "Tonight."

"In 2009, I'll be 59 years old and will have had this dream job for 17 years," Leno said. "When I signed my new contract, I felt that the timing was right to plan for my successor and there is no one more qualified than Conan.

"Plus, I promised Mavis I would take her out for dinner before I turned 60," the notoriously workaholic Leno said about his wife.

When they signed Leno to his latest contract extension, NBC executives said they asked Leno when he'd feel comfortable making a transition. He knew that they wanted to keep O'Brien but that wouldn't be likely if Leno kept doing the job indefinitely.

Leno's agreement to a 2009 exit gives him the chance to make a smoother transition than when he took over from Johnny Carson on May 25, 1992, said Aaron Barnhart, a Kansas City Star columnist who once ran a newsletter on late-night TV news. Leno was criticized then for not even mentioning his predecessor.

For his first few years at "Tonight," Leno trailed the person he beat for the job _ David Letterman _ in ratings and critical respect. But Leno eclipsed Letterman among viewers in the 1995-96 season and hasn't looked back.

In the season that concluded last week, "Tonight" averaged 5.8 million viewers, a 2 percent increase over the previous year. Letterman's "Late Show" on CBS averaged 4.2 million, up 8 percent from the year before.

Some in the industry privately thought it odd that Leno, who rarely if ever misses work, would willingly place a deadline on himself unless he was being pushed by NBC.

NBC executives were not commenting on Monday.

Sadly, someone beat me to the punch again on a similar issue, the one that keeps hopping around.

Still no fair participants.

Though I asked 2 today!

So I cans afely say no one is still going.

Off that, I figured I'd be political again today.

Here's some intresting TIDBITS.

WMD in Iraq?

"A leader, not a mis-leader" -- Rich Carroll

Did Bush mislead America? Were there really Weapons of Mass Distruction in Iraq? Bush was running on the same information as the Clinton Administration.

"We urge you, after consulting with Congress, to take necessary actions (including, if appropriate, air and missile strikes on suspect Iraqi sites) to respond effectively to the threat posed by Iraq's refusal to end its weapons of mass destruction programs."
- From a letter signed by Joe Lieberman, Dianne Feinstein, Barbara A. Milulski, Tom Daschle, & John Kerry among others on October 9, 1998

"The community of nations may see more and more of the very kind of threat Iraq poses now: a rogue state with weapons of mass destruction, ready to use them or provide them to terrorists. If we fail to respond today, Saddam and all those who would follow in his footsteps will be emboldened tomorrow." -- Bill Clinton in 1998

"In the four years since the inspectors left, intelligence reports show that Saddam Hussein has worked to rebuild his chemical and biological weapons stock, his missile delivery capability, and his nuclear program. He has also given aid, comfort, and sanctuary to terrorists, including Al Qaeda members, though there is apparently no evidence of his involvement in the terrible events of September 11, 2001. It is clear, however, that if left unchecked, Saddam Hussein will continue to increase his capacity to wage biological and chemical warfare, and will keep trying to develop nuclear weapons.
--Hillary Clinton, October 10, 2002

For more than two decades, Saddam Hussein has sought weapons of mass destruction through every available means. We know that he has chemical and biological weapons. He has already used them against his neighbors and his own people, and is trying to build more.
--John Edwards, Oct 10, 2002

.........then............

"George Bush sold us on going to war with Iraq based on the threat of weapons of mass destruction. But we still haven't found them. ... We were misled about weapons of mass destruction."
-- John Kerry, April 27th, 2004

"Congress must censure President Bush for misleading the country about Iraq's weapons of mass destruction"
--Moveon.org "Democracy in Action" Moveon.org (will open in new window)

thats all for now

Yep.

Totally just did some liberal bashing.

Courtesy of the blonde one.

Been meaning to put those up for awhile, just to stupid to do it.

And just for good measure

By: Bill O'Reilly for BillOReilly.com
Thursday, Sep 23, 2004

President Bush doesn't really like the press and with good reason. The media "gotcha game" has been elevated to almost hysterical levels, and any mistake or misstatement by a President is front page news. Would you want to walk a high wire everyday?

So the President rarely gives in-depth interviews, and his press conferences are held to a minimum. One on one, Mr. Bush is an engaging guy, but it's tough to be relaxed when every word you say is parsed and dissected. Unlike Bill Clinton, George W. Bush does not seek personal approval, at least not openly. Mr. Clinton loves adoration; Mr. Bush is much more private in his presentation.

Therefore, I approached my thirty minute interview with the President cautiously. I kept my presence low key, which is a tremendous departure for me. There are certain rules that have to be followed when talking with the most powerful man in the world, and I respected the guidelines.

For example, I am known for confrontational interviews, but you simply cannot tell a sitting President that you, the interviewer, know more than he does. That would make you look like a moron. So open confrontation goes right out the window.

Also, the tone of your questions must be respectful. Although I asked everything I wanted to ask and there were no restrictions in the interview, my queries were posed less aggressively than usual. I was direct, but subdued, another departure for me. By the way, I never show my questions to anyone in advance, and that rule applied to the President.

Security is massive for every presidential appearance. To even get to the interview room in a New York City hotel, I had to go through hoops that make U.S. airport security look like the Mexican border. Back elevators were taken, I was perused by at least a dozen Secret Service Agents, and everything was bulletproof except my questions.

The President, himself, is a different man than the one I interviewed four years ago. Back then, as the Governor of Texas, he was more casual in his language, both body and verbal. He carried himself with authority in 2000, but now he seems to be aware that he is a life and death decision maker and that awesome responsibility has seeped into his persona. He's very aware of his position in life.

Mr. Bush was much more business-like this time around. He kept the chit-chat short and seemed anxious to answer the questions. I believe he likes the joust when he thinks the playing field is fair. I gave him a square deal last time around, and he remembered.

A TV interview is far different than a print one in the sense that facial expressions and posture play a key roll. My job is to break down the image and give viewers a glimpse at the real person sitting in front of me. I asked the President very short questions about very precise things: his National Guard service, the Swift Boat ads, Iraq and Iran, the Mexican border, Jacques Chirac, the fairness of the press and how his faith in God influences his decisions.

Most of the time, Mr. Bush was direct and to the point. A few times he evaded. He was, however, intensely focused, and so was I, except for one secret lapse. In the middle of my talk with the President, my mind flashed back for just a second to my childhood in Levittown, New York. The most powerful man on earth was answering my questions. Who woulda thunk it?

Courtest of http://billoreilly.com

^_^

Well, now that I've succeeded in being all big and republican today, let's try to find some HUMOR.

HUMOR.

AlllRIGHT.

Well,....oh..oh shoot..

I did have an insightful conversation with Blake today, for whatever reason. I usually tend to avoid having intelligent conversations, mostly due to the fact that most people are unable to carry an intelligent conversation. Sure, being an idiot is fun, but there's no substance to it, let me tell you. So when the opprutunity presents itself to actually ACHIEVE this intelligence and power in a magnificient showing of the english language, I tend to grab it.

Overpowering that previous paragraph is that I said "Insightful conversation with Blake".

haha.

::shrugs::

Deal with it, suckas.

But man, Conan O'Brien, coming on at 11:35..

I would actually be able to WATCH it then.

But boy, will I sure miss Leno and his Headline antics!

And Kevin! Gah. kevin. You pot smoking bald black man you.

And good heavens! I beat ALL the stupid fat kids to lunch today!

^_^

Freakin' fat kids.

I even got the GOOD pizza.

While I was watching Fox News, I believe it was Hannity and Colmes, this one fellow made this excellent example of why kerry has been hit so hard by the flip flop thing.

He said basically this,

If you had a spouse, and you had been married for years, and I told you she was obnoxious, you'd know I was a fool. You know your spouse, and I have never met them. Now say you had a blind date. If I told you, "Yeah! I know them..they are REALLY obnoxious.." You would say, well...hmm..maybe that's nto such a good idea. Reflecting that, is the fact that we've HAD bush for president longer then Kerry, and Kerry is our blind date. The things that are said may not be true, but because we don't KNOW him, it is easy for us to fall into what they want us to hear.

The thing Mr. Kerry needs to do here, is actually do something. Something. See, Bush came on recently and said "The war's going good, blah blah blah". Well, anyone in America can tell it's not growing better by the day, so why won't Kerry do something about THAT? Go say something, be HEARD.

Instead we go back to Vietnam, and realize he should have ran for president during the 60's, when Vietnam actually mattered.

Oh MAN do I love ranting about politics.

Can't wait to see some responses.

-Smurfy

Flash Flash Revolution

Smurfy — 2004-09-27T10:09:45-05:00

ITS FEEDING THE ADDICTION

http://www.flashflashrevolution.com/index.php

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-09-28T05:09:01-05:00

BWHAHAHAHA! My new THEATER scene is going to kick TAILAGE. Monologue Scene (Scene is a street, with no traffic) Scene I Characters- Princess Bianca- Young English princess, speaks in a deep cockney accent Doctor Freakenstein- Mad non-genius scientist escaping tax debts Roddy McSexton- Out of work aerobics instructor. Now sells tapes on the streets SteveDave Doyle- Small drunken man with a big view on life Dave Honkey- Former employee of Cracker Company, he was fired because they needed room for the mayonnaise division _____________________ Princess Bianca- Unhand me you villainous pig, Freakenstein! You shan’t be able to get away with this! Dr. Freakenstein- Oh SHUTUP. And you listen HERE, it’s DOCTOR Freakenstein, SUCKA. Anyway, I just need you.. for.. uh.. TAX PURPOSES! HAHAHA! Princess- Why do you NEED to be so LOUD… Freak- Um… well.. Mostly, it’s all because of my DISEASE..YEAH… see.. It’s.. uh.. HAHA! OBESITY! Roddy- Oh JOY, did I just hear someone say OBESITY?! Oh JOY indeed Roddy! I HAVE INSPIRATION NOW!

Dexion

Smurfy — 2004-09-29T09:09:20-05:00

Smurfy, the mighty DEXION.

God bless the greek language, let me tell you what man.

Secondly, this Elwood business, this play Harvey,

This is killing me

I cannot seem to pull off what I want this character to be, I cannot GET into this guy.. He's so bloody complicated, it just drives me insane.

Joke to invisible rabbit, stare in awe at nurse kelly, look serious to doctor...then..fix..fix..fix invisble rabbit's necktie..::shrugs::

Blasted rabbit.

-.-....

So I was talking to Sarah Tesh about it, and she kind of, was all, Nice.

I certainly do like nice people.

That made me feel a bit better about the stupid rabbit.

Stupid rabbit.

I also almost caued the death of Megan. Tickling someones feet while they are on a tall ladder can do that.

And then I'm pretty sure I somehow killed Kate too, bu I can't remember why.

Other then that, I have way too much homework to be sitting here obsessing about this BLOG.

I mean WEB-LOG.

I mean oh snap where is my freaking english book.

I have GOT to start REMEMBERING what homework I have to do..GAH..

-SMURFY THE DEXION

(Also, I lost the homecoming race to the stupid jocks.)

(Stupid jocks.)

(rawr.)

(...)

Say what?

Smurfy — 2004-09-29T09:09:49-05:00

Hilzarie Asterie: ew?
Raining SkyFire: She's all
Raining SkyFire: like
Raining SkyFire: ..
Raining SkyFire: She moves to fast.
Hilzarie Asterie: lol
Hilzarie Asterie: my brother read that and he was like "Has Smurfy found himself a little smurf girlfriend?" "Huh?" "BLUE BOOBS!!"
Raining SkyFire: o_o

Raining SkyFire: ...
Raining SkyFire: That's just crazy.
Hilzarie Asterie: OO
Raining SkyFire: YES THEY ARE BLUE
Hilzarie Asterie: lol

Further proof that I never quite know what's going on, or what's coming out of my mouth.

So, a guy walks onto a sidewalk

Smurfy — 2004-09-29T10:09:36-05:00

So, I walk up to Michelle Cohen at lunch today, and push her a bit.

"AHHHH" she screams and runs a foot or two.

"I thought you were a BEE!"

Too which I reply,

"Hahahaha...I'm..I'm..Holy snap I am a bee.."

Truth, only in advertising.

Smurfy — 2004-09-30T09:09:39-05:00

Well.

Haha, look at that.

I performed the scene I wrote for my group today in theater, to much success.

But that blasted Dr. Freakenstein character, I was stuck in that all day.

In civics, we had this question mr clyburn kept pressing us about, because he's an idiot

WHERE DOOOOOO THOSE LAST THREE ELECTORAL COLLEGE VOTES COME FROM!?!?!? HMMMM?!?!?!

And I said

Wait a minute..

THE DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA!

HAHAHAHA! I GOT IT! SUCKA'S!

Some people laughed, others just stared at me in utter disbelief that I could exist.

Which reminds me....

Some guy came up to me on the way to 7th period, and he goes

"Hey SMURFY"

I said

"Wha.....a...who the heck are you?"

"Do you know who I am smurfy?!"

"Uh...no?"

"GOOD"

::guy runs into 400 building:::

WHA??!?!?!

I have no idea what that was about, but I was watching my surroundings closely after that.

But not before Kat almost got a SHOT of vitamin DAVID.

Kat, kat KAT...

And of course, when I woke up today, I was no longer a bee.

LATERZ SUCKA

And dude,

Watch the politcal debate tonight.

I'm gonna have some new material now!

^_^!

behold!

THE POWER OF A BRAIN WITH NO NEO CORTEX!!!

IT IS IN THE MIND OF NONE!

SQUIRREL!

-Smurfy

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-02T12:10:26-05:00

I..I missed it..Misssed a day by 24 minutes....

CURSES!

The fair, or something like it.

Smurfy — 2004-10-02T12:10:37-05:00

-----Abridged Version----

Well, for some reason october is at the bottom of the calendar list.

::shrugs::

Well, let start simply shall we?

At 2:45, I began the usual drudgery of 7th period, with Good ol' Mr. Clyburn and his stupid hair, and his long drawn out pointless anecedotes.

Kind of like me, only mine usually have a ...um..moral..or..humor or something...::shrugs::

Anyway,

At 3, the intercom buzzed to life,

EXCUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME MR CLYBURN, will you SEND (BLEEP) to the office pleaaaaaAAAAssse!?!/!!

TO wich he replied,

so I left, but as I closed the door, I whispered to the class,

"Good luck in this SUCKY class, fools. Smurfy is OUTTA HERE"

SUre it sounds gay.

ANd it is!

But what matters is that I puffed up my ego.

So after driving to the middle school of pain and torment, we were on our way to the FAIR.

The dixie CLASSIC!

So, after meeting up with...Sam..and..and..Matt Green.....u_u'.., we were to begin an afternoon that seemed more odd then anything.

Mat green has this happy habit of randomly getting mad and walking off.

Or not getting mad, and just randomly walking off.

Ah, but not to worry, we alos had my sister to worry about.

I had to..."escort" her around the fair, because she's an idiot and can't do it by herself.

So after many many phonecalls in which I screamed, "WHAT?! WHERE ARE YOU!? GO OVER HERE", trying to hear over the noise, you know..

Not doing that next year,

even of course,

if I'm forced too like this year!

^_^

Of course, I was a little dissapointed Brooke couldn't come, but she's alright. She just had too much to do, too much on her. I do hope she is able to attend the movie filming tommorow..

Aye.

So, the fair, yes,

After some point, sam and matt left, and it was just Me, Jason, Racheal, Kim..and..uhm..blast it..whats that other girls name..Gah.. I SUCK at names..Mackenzie..yes..yes..her...

She certainly has changed in the past two years, mackenzie.

But anyway, after much flirtation and whatnot, the fireworks went off.

Quickly...oh..shoot..

Looks like IIIII have some ANGRY parents!

-=^_^=-!!!

LOLZERZ!

I'll finish later, when I can remember more things, and I don't smell like fried corn.

Adios bloggers.

-Smurfy

Steven! Thou suxurz!

Smurfy — 2004-10-02T10:10:34-05:00

Well. Isn't steven a jerk. I ask him about the scene I wrote for us to use in class. "Hey Steven!" "wha!? " "So, did you like how our scene went thursday?" "What scene?" "Er..the one..with.. you as that..aerobics guy..and me as dr. freakenstein and all that? The one I wrote?" "I don't know" (Steven asks some random theater girl if she liked it) "Hey, (I forget her name)" "Yes?" "How did you like my scene last thursday?" "Your scene?" "Yeah" "It was fantastic" (He turns to me) "My scene was fantastic" So, so, wait..what..YOUR scene? WHA?!?! No SIR. OURRRR scene. Stupid idiot.

Woodrow Wilson: Drug, or anti-drug?

Smurfy — 2004-10-02T10:10:58-05:00

So I'm on the set of the movie, "Woodrow Wilson", that's being filmed at West for the next few weeks or so.

And the thing is, these are the freaking coolest guys I have ever met.

After doing my obnoxious announcery voice for some random reason, this one guy pulls me aside and says

Would you do a PSA announcement for the drug woodorw wilson in that announcer voice?

Sure I say!

He says, do it funny like you did before

So I said, alright, alright, tell me when we're rolling

And..action..

"So remember children, dont do drugs! They will RUIN your SAT scores!"

And then I did another ad.. and then another ad.

Then some extras stuff.

I felt quite groovy after these 19-20's-ish way groovy guys told me I was funny and should come to the school of arts.

Sure did.

Well, thats enough ego-inflating for tonight.

So, I went to Jason's today and played DDRMAX2

Which, by the way, I suck at.

For some reason my foot couldn't work the..ps2 mats right...yeah..yeah..THATS why I failed!

ALSO THE CURSE THANKS YOU FOR ENETERING!

HAVE FUN WITH "THE GRUDGE"!

I can never read as many blogs as I want tooo reeeeeead

So, Jason, Brooke, and I, the most angry short man on the planet, were kung foo fighting today, discussing the logistics of Kill Bill, and the five finger palm exploding heart technique, when all the sudden I have this insatiable urge to yell out ALL YOUR BASE OUR BELONG TO SMURFY.

Fortunetelly, I didn't.

But they set us up the bomb.

Although Blake did shove my nose into brookes face violently, and jason attempted too, I'm stil here.

And grooving.

GROOVING

~Smurfy

HAHAHA

Smurfy — 2004-10-03T12:10:55-05:00

An update just for the sake of updating, since I won't be able to do this later today, making my ENTRY calendar work right.

Why WAS that ride so addictive?

My ONE SEXY LINE.:: ::falls to knees:

Smurfy — 2004-10-03T08:10:14-05:00

::falls to knees:::

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Woodrow Wilson: The continuation of a legacy of doom

Smurfy — 2004-10-03T08:10:07-05:00

Further proof Steven is the biggest jerk I've ever met.

Actual dialog.

Director-guy who's name eludes me, gives me a lead part and says, dude, you're just FUNNY...this part is perfect for you here, you just do this..etc..(describes me falling onto my knees screaming why, because the hott cheerleader I asked out killed herself)

So I walk back to this group of odd'ns, and reveal the news, that I have a part now!

Steven says to Cameron,

"Dude, Cameron, you oughta go make them give you a part man. If they give a part to Smurfy here, then you could have two or three. Seriously go do it, if he got one you REALLY can"

Man.

Steven,

You SUCK dude.

You SUCK.

(((((((((((((((Emo)))))))))))))))

(((((((((((((((End Emo)))))))))

So I'm standing around after arriving at school, and some girl comes up

"Woah..you're..uh..you're smurfy right?"

"Er..Yeah..I think so...yeah..yeah..I do that"

"yeah..I've been to your blog..I'm..um..Butterflysoup.."

"Holy SHIZNAP"

_________________________

And Brooke, next time we kung foo, you are SO dead.

::makes hand motion:: KILLED!

o_o

Smurfy — 2004-10-04T06:10:53-05:00

You know there's only 88 days left in this year?

It's insane...

Now I need more time...

hmmm...PORK.

Smurfy — 2004-10-05T10:10:18-05:00

Conversation: (Not fake like the 2nd Steven one....jason...)
-During Play Practice-

Erin: So am I going to be wearing a bathrobe in this scene? I want to be NAKED.

Mrs Hubbard: Erin! gah! Teenagers and their hormones...

Carlos: For Erin, don't you mean, HORNYMONES?!

Carlos: HAHAHA!

I'm just going to shoot myself in the face.

And after debating with myself for some time, I really have to give it up that I actually DID, indeed suck at dance dance revolution, and Jason jsut beat the crap out of me...

Badly.

I might add.

Stupid ego.

So, I arrived in Mr. Clyburns class today, and he was there holding a small piece of paper.

"OH (JABBER) FOR YOU I THINK MAYBE YEAH I THINK IM MR CLYBURN (JABBER)"

So I went back to my desk, opened up the note, and began crying, for included was a picture of the DEMON TROLL LEPRUCHAUN DOLL.

And the mysetrious name "LIZZY"

Her accursed innuendo powers bested me again!

Curses!

And then as I was watching the VP debate, I was like...

You know...

This is just DULL.

So I got to thinking.

You know, if someone, say..like..someone who actually had a personality, and it wasn't just crap like Kerry, or just a mental jumble like bush, who could be FUNNY..and call the opponent FUNNY things..

::shrugs::

It might make listening about Iraq for the 5000th time in two weeks bearable.

But sadly,

All's we had was John Edwards making me wish he was from Virginia, and Dick Cheney NOT using randomly placed expletives.

We need more of that.

Really!

There's no spontaneity (misspelled) anymore. It's to sanitized.

Stupid sanitization.

Today...

Smurfy — 2004-10-06T05:10:19-05:00

....is not finished yet, so this blog entry will be added too later.

So, against our will, we were beset with a conversation about politics in theater today.

I was once again reminded of why the voting age is 18, and not much younger. For one thing, most "Kids" have no idea what they happen to be talking about, while another majority follows things closer then most adults...

Carlos told us all that the world was doomed and we were living in a society that is "Worse then that book..um..1984"

More on THAT after this CHILI gets eaten.

o_O...OW.

Smurfy — 2004-10-06T08:10:23-05:00

According to legend, only Brooke can balance on the breezeway counter and do kung-foo poses.

And I learned, the HARD way.

HYUK!

Smurfy — 2004-10-07T07:10:25-05:00

Now I'm having second thoughts about wearing these old overalls to school....

They're alot bigger then I remember, actually.

Alot bigger.

HOLY SNAP! THE BUS IS HERE YET I AM NOT THERE! AWAY!

Mmm...See that? This is relaxation.

Smurfy — 2004-10-07T04:10:29-05:00

For the next few moments anyway, I doubt I could get much more relaxed then this..

Maybe it's the I have "Hooka Tooka" on repeat, and it's like..totall..

Oh SNAP is that good bluegrass.

Banjo Maximus.

I don't even feel like RANTING now!

Such a relaxing atmosphere..yes..yes..

Got to talk to alot of people today, and had a good time in theater, you know, what with free day and all.

~_^.

I'll actually update later...but man..

I need more overall's...

Woah..

Smurfy — 2004-10-07T06:10:01-05:00

Yeah...NOOO Idea what I just did to my blog, or why it suddenly morphed sizes..

::shrugs::

Smurfy — 2004-10-07T06:10:38-05:00

Just some weird thing I guess.

So, you all remember our good friend Femi right?

Yeah.

Femi.

Started using her mouth again today, and that can only lead to my demise, or some stuff thats very funny because she's such a jerk.

Imagine this,

It's a test,

and suddenly you hear this loud voice,

MR CLYBURN TELL EVERYONE TO SHUTUP I CANT CONCENTRATE!

SERIOUSLY!

GUYS SHUTUP!

And then she just laid her head down and stared at me.

Feeling the awkward glance gland going off in my head, I looked casually over at her with a look of utter confusion on my face, with which i was met,

what?!

What do you WANT?!

And then I stuttered for a second..

and I wanted SO BADLY to say,

"You know, I keep getting in trouble at school. They say I have to stop bringing this bug GUNS to school. ::flexes::"

Man.

it's these kind of times when you just want to look like an idiot.

Unfortunetelly, I retained my composure.

And finish..the..test..on..something....

So, of course, today was "Hillbilly Day" today at school.

Eh..Heh...

I just wanted to wear my overall's which I did!

Yep...-.-...

So, I guess that makes tommorow

"Lay thee Smacketh Downeth" day.

Which means I get to ride around west in a float with a sword, killing a "Raider", which happens to be the team we're playing.

Booya.

With Fall break coming up so quickly, my usually non-existent attention span is growing even shorter.

One more day, smurfy.

One more day.

Oh, look,

I have to go feed the doom goats.

SO LONG CHILDREN AND CHILDREN WHO ARE VERY VERY FAT!

-Smurfy

(Haha. You're not fat.

You goose.)

::shrugs::

Deal with it,

A'ight?

And then I had fun with the porn IM spambots!

SexyTammy291213:
HEY. Look at my new Profile. click on GET INFO!
Raining SkyFire: HMMMMMM
Raining SkyFire: ...
Raining SkyFire: I don
Raining SkyFire: *I don't see one that says..GET INFO...
Raining SkyFire: HELLO?
Raining SkyFire: SEXY TAMMY?!
Raining SkyFire: HELLO?!

And then I found an even worse joke then usual.

I mean TERRIBLE....

But I had the urge to make myslef look stupid, so here we go!

"Wow!" said the sailor. "What about the hook?"

"We were boarding an enemy ship, battling the other sailors with swords. One of them cut me

"Incredible!" remarked the sailor. "And the eye patch?" "A seagull dropping fell in me eye," replied the pirate.

"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?"

the sailor asked incredulously.

Said the pirate.
"It was the first day with the hook."

A sailor meets a pirate in a bar. The pirate has a peg-leg, a hook and an eye patch. "How'd you end up with a peg-leg?" asks the sailor. "I was swept overboard in a storm," says the pirate.
"A shark bit off me whole leg."

There is nothing to fear but bad 80's music! And techno! Bad techno!

Smurfy — 2004-10-08T06:10:42-05:00

So I was in the homecoming float for drama club, right?

Well.

See, I had a sword, and I was BATTLING the "Raider", who happened to be brooke (Hilzarie), and so, after I "Killed" the raider, I began to "Kick" the Raider.

Turns out I accidentily kicked brooke like, what, 4 times?

Yeah.

I'm screwed.

But hey, pretty awesome day man!

This chick on ths bus was like

"haha, I could hear you yelling about something all the way at the top of the stands, and I was like, hahahaha, that HAS to be smurfy!"

And then I was like,

"Man. That is just FANTASTIC"

Because, see,

The thing is.

umm..

So I got to skip the doom class! You know, the realm of Femi, Goat Kingdom, that thing.

7th period.

::shudders::

But Hey, I did get to act like an obnoxious idiot in front of 80% of the school!

That's like, a personal DREAM!

And I REALIZED it!

^_^!!!!!

80%!!!

Thats almost 82%!!!

But hey, you know,

it's time for homecoming.

I'll update LATAH, yo!

-Smurfy

w00000000000000000000000000t

KARMA

Smurfy — 2004-10-08T11:10:01-05:00

Apparently after Jarrod (GAYRROD) got off the bus today, some guys drove to his house and beat him up.

Haha.

It would be very sad if he wasn't the meanest person you'd ever meet.

He randomly flicked off a car of ghetto upperclassmen yesterday, and they happened to know another guy on the bus, so such and such happened, the other guy who knew the ghetto upperclassmen got off the bus with jarrod the next day (today), called the ghetto guys, and brought them to jarrods house.

They got out, apparently talked for awhile, then began the duel!

Apparently the hit him 5 times in the face with an umbrella, cutting him, and giving hima NASTY little bruise on the forehead.

If that's not karma for twisting my ears to the point of blood last year, I don't know what is!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-09T02:10:39-05:00

"So you, yes, glad your here"

"So what part am I doing Tom?"

"Well, you're playing this nerdy guy"

"Yeah."

"Then he gets his ass kicked"

TAKE SIX.

GIT-R-DONE?

Smurfy — 2004-10-10T05:10:25-05:00

Ba-da-BING.

My elbow is in not quite as much pain as it was after the sixth take of the "Smurfy get's his ass kicked" scene yesterday.

But my WORD would I do it six more times.

Being able to do this is, just to be able to be in front of a camera, to be able to act, it's the greatest opprutunity I could have ever hoped to have. Sure, it's just a short student thesis film, but when you do the small things, it's the big opprutunities that come out of it.

Getting to know these people is more incredibly worthwhile then I could ever hope to write down on words.

Inspiration!

Final day of filming is tuesday...can't wait to screen the thing..

May..

That freshmen girl was talking about something stupid, and that guy with the CRRRRRAZY moustache, I believe it's evan?

Ha,

He says after the stupid freshmen who hits me all the time appologizes for being random,

"Don't worry! There's a place for that kind of randomness.....And it's right over there, by that tree. Away from here."

The moustache must enable a certain level of unimaginable wit to enter your brain area.

Blast it.

I need one of those.

By those, I obviously mean "Brain Areas".

::nods::

But it's now fall break!

That means

A) Less "ANGRY-SMURFY"

B) More crrrrrrrrrrrazy stuff!

C) Holy SNAP do I enjoy weeks off.

So for all you quote unquote "BAD" rednecks out there, be warned,

If I have to listen to some idiot say "GIT-R-DONE" 5 or 6 more times, I'm going to stab something.

Probably myself.

-Smurfy

Woah!

Smurfy — 2004-10-11T08:10:11-05:00

The legend of the window. I almost died! REALLY! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wednesday, february 18th, 2004. The day of the legend. THE DAY THE STORY BEGAN. It was a peaceful lunch period. Much like any other day. A good deal of snow, was on the ground, packing good on the slightly wetter ground. A snowball massacre ensues. Some upperclassmen, and some stupid freshman/ a sophomore. Throwing snowballs. A, one, Kyle Rassmussen, freshman by level, turns his head. And is pegged in the side of the face, by an extremely powerfully thrown snowball by a one, Zach Fudge. Smurfy. Minding his own business, annoying people as usual, is in the line of people dodging upperclass snowballs. When he see's the unfortunate accident occur. And doth he run! backwards! Until i was faced with the dillema of a water filled gutter, and no where to run! "You threw that didn't you!" he announced, charging. "Dude, No, I sewar I didn't man!" Said the white as a white kid smurfy. "Well, THEY ::points to upperclassmen:: said you did! Kyle announces, chargin at me, very close now Then, the battle occurs. Amidst the screaming of people announcing I was innocent, He grabbed my shoulders and shoved backwards. tTripping in the muddy water-filled gutter, I reach back to prevent a fall, bracing against the building. Only, there is no building. A window. And through it I go My back, shvoed against the thin glass, shatters it, as my hand gores through. A class, in room 403, screams. I pull myself out of the mess, noticing glass on my hands. I run away quickly as Zach begins to yell at Kyle. I arrive at the math building, where I notice there is blood pouring out of my hand. ----time passes---- After 3 conferences with various people, including the officer, and filling out report after report. I am free, and the bleeding, has stopped.

Woah!

Smurfy — 2004-10-11T08:10:45-05:00

So I spent 53 dollars on Tales of Symphonia today.

Then I spent apporximately 4 hours playing Tales of Symphonia today.

Good heavens, this game is TEH ROXORZ.

An actual update? NAWWWWWWWWWW

Smurfy — 2004-10-11T09:10:13-05:00

So, it's fall break.

...

Yep.

Fall break.

Sure is good to be on FALL BREAK....

..u_u'...

Fall break...

So I was at the fair again friday, for the demolition derby, right?

Well, I tried to find a seat ont he balcony thing like usual, but you have to look close, so you know, you don't sit beside a chain smokin' redneck or something.

Well, I sniffed casually around one area, and noticed a general lack of SECOND HAND DOOM SMOKE, so I sat myself down there, right proud of finding a spot without a chain smoking redneck.

Shortly after the derby began, I noticed something that made the hair on my neck stand up.

I wasn't sitting beside a chain cigarette smoker, I was sitting beside a chain cigar smoker.

Yes.

Cigar.

I didn't even think people still smoked those things.

Well, haha, now isn't that just crazy!

Then the person beside me turned out to be a chain cigerette smoker anyway.

By chain I mean

Every 10-15 minutes that I looked over, they were either in mid-smoke, or ..um..start-..s..smoke?..

For pretty much the entire time.

Luckily for me, cigar guy only had 4 cigars.

After he ran out he just left.

Yep.

Fall break.

Then I got this..this stupid haircut..

Blasted haircut.

It's going to ruin the film continuity!!

CURSES!

FOILED!

FOILED AGAIN!

LENS PUNCH.

Smurfy — 2004-10-13T12:10:22-05:00

Finished the last shot of Woodrow today,

And as ti turned out, my face is the last thing on screen before credits.

::shrugs::

See, as mentioned before, my character got the crap beat out of him,

but then at the end, in the character 'Retrospective', I'm shown doing some sort of kung-foo followed by me kicking some guy alot.

Then I run up to the camera and BOOM.

LENS PUNCH.

::fade::

Although I had to wear these.."KARATE" pants..

The wasit was like...so..so..tiny..

Or maybe I'm just fat,

who knows.

But if that just doesn't scream comedy, I don't know what does.

Satire.

Satire COMEDY.

~_^

So, beyond that, my day wasn't to eventful.

Played more tales of symphonia, but if I got into that, everyone would be flaming my blog with DOOM messages, such as

"OMG TEH VIDEO GAMEZ R SATAN AN NERDZ SUK.

PS. UR MOMMA"

Those sort of thing.

You know?

I know I certainly do.

I also realized that some english teacher has 4 copies of "Lord of the Possums" in his..video cabinet..

That's 5 too many copies of "Lord of the Possums".

Five.

FIVE TOO MANY.

Terrible..terrible..

Ugh..

Don't ask about that either, I won't be able to answer without using some bizarre sentence structure.

Like usual!

Blake and I also spent a majority of the afternoon running away from fat girl..

Obnoxious...annoying...kicks me alot fat girl.

..u_u'..

Oh yes, and let me tell you something about

"The Forbidden Turkey", and

"The Bread of Death"

These are NOT TO BE EATEN.

EVER.

So some random person said,

AYE THEY BE HAVING FOOD FOR THE EXTRA'S IN ((Smurfy doesn't pay attention here)).

Then said random person walked away and apprently dissapeared into the ground, so I snuck off in search off the mysterious lunch foods.

Well, I thought I had it.

Blake, the trio of odd freshmen and I, stumbled into this room that was outfitted with soda and LUNCHMEATS..and..LUNCH..BREADS...

So, I say,

I'll just have a slice of TURKEY!

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

No! Do not! It is the FORBIDDEN TURKEY!

...ah..too late...

Upon stuffing half of the forbidden turkey into my large and unruly mouth, I noted something odd.

The freshmen trio of odd girls had left, along with fat girl.

Blake was left staring at this new occurance.

The room was FILLING with people who were PRETTY pissed off about me eating their turkey.

By the time I managed to get the other half of the turkey into my mouth, 4 different people were just staring at me, and blake was sort of slipping out.

"So,"

One guy said,

"Is that turkey filling?"

Then another woman spoke up

"Mmm..Yes...If you swallow that turkey quickly and leave we'll make sure nothing happens."

Starteled at what effects this 'Happening' might be, I immedietely inhaled the turkey, and ran down the hallway very quickly.

Then 20 minutes later Tom said I could eat the turkey.

Boy did I get cold looks.

Mostly because of

"THE FORBIDDEN TURKEY"

-Smurfy

BULLETIN

Smurfy — 2004-10-13T03:10:53-05:00

The desians have attacked!

Kill the desians!

:;sniff::

Smurfy — 2004-10-14T12:10:18-05:00

What's that I smell?

Could it be bush catching on fire from sucking at these debates?

Possibly.

HAHA!

A REPUBLICAN ADMITTED IT!

FEAR ME CHILDREN!

From the magic of this other guy's brain

Smurfy — 2004-10-14T12:10:37-05:00

Some dialog I overheard from that one guy who was at filming who looked like..um..that other guy..

"...and I actually wrote this other one entitled; 'Second to the left', which actually made it to the second cut, and see, what it's about, (this movie he wrote) is this guy, he's all in love with this girl, and he goes to be her this present, and he buys her one of those..uh..stars, like, the ones you can name and all that.

So he finally tells the girl how he feels and all that crap, and they go walking, and it's night and the guy says, 'I bought you something' and she asks what it is..all that.. and then he actually points to the RIGHT and says, 'That star. the second to the left'.

It was way too stupid though"

Hmmm..

Smurfy — 2004-10-14T02:10:38-05:00

http://www.freedomunderground.org/memoryhole/pentagon.php#Main

Kind of intresting little thing.

Really.

I'm not much of a conpiracist at all, but this has valid points.

For once.

GAH!

Smurfy — 2004-10-14T02:10:00-05:00

I feel the despereate need to write down some sort of anecedote as usual, but all I've got going is this microwavable bacon.

...

Someone needs to yell at me or something.

Maybe I'll just pretend to make fun of Fat Girl again..

Ew.

Smurfy — 2004-10-14T02:10:03-05:00

So I made a new..header pic..

Enjoy the smurfy goodness.

VAN HELSING= OMG NO

Smurfy — 2004-10-15T12:10:17-05:00

Gettin ready for sky captain.

Yeah.

So last night, while playing "Tales of Symphonia", which pwnz all your stupid FF games, I experienced the biggest plot twist I could have wildly imagined.

Then I was like,

"Man. This is..just..dude..man...DUDE....

...Cool."

So, you know.

I'm gonna watch sky captain now.

Hopefully the doom chicks from last time wont force us to watch..van helsing again...

That movie SUCKED.

..But besides that.

Anyone seen that new video from Franz Ferdinand?

"This Fire"?

MAN.

::JAMZ:::

Best movie ending EVER.

Smurfy — 2004-10-15T05:10:32-05:00

"Lens cap"

Haahaaaaa! YES! VICTORY!

Smurfy — 2004-10-15T11:10:23-05:00

The epic adventures of someone who doesn't have epic adventures:

-THE MINISERIES-

School is slowly creeping back into my head.

I have a project due like...next thursday..thats going to take until like, friday to do....next friday..::shrugs::

OH WELL!

::credits::

But, besides that...

I've watched "Sky Captain and The World of Tommorow", as you can see by my earlier update, and am quite happy to say it was all as good as I had hoped.

The style of the shots seemed very reminiscient of say, the old old old superman animated series, I believe from the 40's or 50's. Although, according to the date of the last journal entry from the dead scientist guy, and being 20 years later, the film should have took place around 1938-1939.

But in it, they made reference to "The first world war"

Meaning they..should have had a second.

But hey, who cares, it was a good movie.

Giant..freakin...killer robots..

Good stuff man.

It was shown in the same theater as "Kill Bill Volume 2", which..um..yeah..

You can check my entries from June to see how..how that..how that effected things.

Gah.

But I must depart!

-Smurfy

LAZY:: ::harmonica plays

Smurfy — 2004-10-16T01:10:49-05:00

::harmonica plays::

The weeeeeekend is endddding so SOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNN....

Where have all the hours gone!

Perhaps I slept them all away.

THE ROBOTS ARE COMING

Smurfy — 2004-10-16T10:10:11-05:00

AIM chatter bots are attacking!

Any suspects!

Information!

Deposit here!

Known entities: FlipperHogger08, funkzter649, Eyedropbc44, koolaidrocks

Known attacks- Smurfy, Jason, Lee, Jaclyn, Julie Whelan...?

Who ART thee?

Apparently also some canadian friend of Jasons...

Who the HECK is ALEX?!

Smurfy — 2004-10-17T03:10:41-05:00

So I'm sitting her, doin english homework, when suddenly STEVEN IMs me, you know, that guy..with the hair..the 70's guy.

Steven Malaga.

So he says

SMURFY QUIT SENDING AIMBOT.COM AFTER ME OR WHATEVER

I said

Wait...what?

ALEX SAID SHE GOT ONE TOO

Dude, turn your caps off.

I WANT AN HONEST ANSWER, NOTHING MORE. YES OR NO?

um...Yeah..let's just says sure.

SURE ISNT STRAIGHT CUT THIS OUT

Umm..Yes..Yes I sent you're bot.

_____________________

O_o

Wha!?!

Who the heck is Alex!?

And WHY is the first person to be blamed for this fiasco smurfy!?

this mystery only deepens.

Who IS this mystery spammer!

Wha?!

Smurfy — 2004-10-17T04:10:56-05:00

So, after operation: ANNOY YOU by the annonymous bot user, I've been living plainly.

haha.

Plainly.

..Blast it...

I had a million things in my head, but as soon as I began writing it, they all flushed out my nose, apprently.

One of our goats got loose this morning.

Anyone here know that I really can't stand those goats?

Nah, no one would notice that.

So after "Finding" what I believe to be the goat known as "Socks", life returned to normal, and well pursued a happier lifestyle.

Freakin' goats.

But, honestly.

What on earth was I going to write...

besides yesterdays SHOCKING news

Wordddd

Smurfy — 2004-10-18T05:10:02-05:00

So I had this far out dream where I got an iPod in the mail, man.

It was this NEW black and RED iPod, that has like, an unGodly amount of drive space, and it was from someone named "Judge".

After I opened, however, it exploded, and a note fell out saying it was from Byron, and then the message exploded.

That was the COOLEST iPod EVER...

And the note said

"This cost 5600$"

The money sign was at the end of the numbers though.

But since when is Byron "Judge"?

My brain doesnt even make sense when it's cut off.

But, see, the iPod had this thing, it said

"ADVANCED PAD"

Where, it was like an old rotary phone, but it had like 17 kbos, all alligned on this wheel.

You turned the whole wheel to find a playlist, then the little knobs to find specific songs.

It was WAAAAY cool.

Before it exploded.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-18T06:10:40-05:00

Made twice,

Broken thrice.

Someday I'll have to make a new one.

Jane anne, probably NOT the bot terrorizer person..

Smurfy — 2004-10-18T08:10:40-05:00

Jane anne botted me earlier, and then responded by making me read the log....

CupofTea4r(5:04:36): SMURFY
Raining SkyFire(5:04:39): yeah?
CupofTea4r(5:04:49): cool
Raining SkyFire(5:04:52): o_o
Raining SkyFire(5:04:53): Er..okay?
CupofTea4r(5:05:02): so do u like pepsi or coke better?
Raining SkyFire(5:05:07): OHHH..bot..
Raining SkyFire(5:05:12): You actually..um..tricked me
Raining SkyFire(5:05:15): for a second
CupofTea4r(5:05:16): what state do u live in?
Raining SkyFire(5:05:19): Mexico.
CupofTea4r(5:05:28): ahh my computer keeps freezing on me!
Raining SkyFire(5:05:32): CURSE MY LUCK
Raining SkyFire(5:05:37): whats your name, sweety
CupofTea4r(5:05:41): i just got my new laptop today, i'm excited lol
Raining SkyFire(5:05:44): NAMRE
Raining SkyFire(5:05:45): **NAME
Raining SkyFire(5:05:47): NAME
CupofTea4r(5:05:55): :-)
Raining SkyFire(5:05:57): O_O
Raining SkyFire(5:05:59): whats your name.
CupofTea4r(5:06:06): oh man I am craving m&m's right now...
Raining SkyFire(5:06:10): TELL ME YOUR BLASTED NAME
CupofTea4r(5:06:23): you want me to tell you?
Raining SkyFire(5:06:25): Yes.
Raining SkyFire(5:06:28): Tell me your name
CupofTea4r(5:06:40): cool
Raining SkyFire(5:06:42): O_O
Raining SkyFire(5:06:43): NAME
Raining SkyFire(5:06:45): TELL ME YOUR NAME
Raining SkyFire(5:06:46): NAME
Raining SkyFire(5:06:47): NAME
Raining SkyFire(5:06:48): NAME
CupofTea4r(5:06:55): i think i am dehydrated lol
Raining SkyFire(5:07:00): HOLY (#&@*@(#
CupofTea4r(5:07:13): what u doin?
Raining SkyFire(5:07:15): O_O
CupofTea4r(5:07:27): do u have a gf/bf?
Raining SkyFire(5:07:28): is your name JENNU?
Raining SkyFire(5:07:30): JENNY?
CupofTea4r(5:07:37): do u think so?
Raining SkyFire(5:08:06): dude
Raining SkyFire(5:08:07): what is your name
CupofTea4r(5:08:17): the stupid phone keeps ringing and I odnt wanna answer it lol
Raining SkyFire(5:08:28): holy SHIZNAP
Raining SkyFire(5:08:30): I got a STUPID one
CupofTea4r(5:08:37): i think i am dehydrated lol
Raining SkyFire(5:08:47): Is your name jenny?
CupofTea4r(5:08:55): i've been wondering that for a long time lol
Raining SkyFire(5:08:57): ...........
Raining SkyFire(5:09:02): You are a VERYS TUPID BOT
CupofTea4r(5:09:06): ahh my computer keeps freezing on me!
Raining SkyFire(5:09:19): good lord dude
Raining SkyFire(5:09:22): how OLD are you
CupofTea4r(5:09:33): alright
Raining SkyFire(5:09:35): NO
CupofTea4r(5:09:45): haha, FunnyMuffin.com has really funny pictures. have you ever been there?
CupofTea4r(5:09:47): thats too bad
Raining SkyFire(5:09:52): how old are you
CupofTea4r(5:10:03): 15, u?
Raining SkyFire(5:10:07): thank YOU
Raining SkyFire(5:10:08): FINALLY
Raining SkyFire(5:10:09): UGH
CupofTea4r(5:10:23): maybe ;-)
CupofTea4r(5:11:23): hello? i just want to talk to u for a bit
The user has signed off or has blocked the bot! Conversation ended...

Civics: The process of death

Smurfy — 2004-10-19T04:10:54-05:00

Boy do I have some updates today.

But first!

Play practice!

LOLOLOLOLOLOL.

You will LAUGH.

Civics, Femi, and you.

Smurfy — 2004-10-19T10:10:51-05:00

So today we did what the infamously idiotic Mr. Clyburn announced as a "Straw poll. We're doing a straw poll. Everyone? We're doing a straw poll"

Of course, this was after he was performing some sort of odd bodily action on some random sophomore.

Mr Clyburn is a middle aged black man who's favorite activity is flirting with 15 year old white girls.

I am not fond of mr clyburn.

So, he then asked if we should make the poll public or private.

Immedietelly, we heard the voice that could only be Femi.

"Mr. CLYBURN, I don't WANT to do a poll!"

::shrugs::

Whatever.

We did it publiclly anyway.

After we polled the class on presidential preference, the chart looked like this

Kerry- 7

Bush- 21

Nader- 1

Undecided-1

Now, Mr clyburn was puzzled, someone hadn't voted.

.....Femi.

"I am politically neutral. I didn't vote"

She announced proudly, with her cornrows and buckteeth flashing wildly.

So, you're undecided? asked mr clyburn

"No. I didn't vote"

..That's..thats undecided.

"No it's not, I just don't know which one to pick mr clyburn"

Femi, thats called undecided.

"No it's NOT mr clyburn, I just don't know who to vote for!"

I present my opinion to you,

Femi Is an idiot.

Also, tommorow is PSAT time!

w00t!::KILLZ HIMSELF::

Also, after class ended, Mr clyburn apparently tried to fuse his body into femi's. I don't think there was anyway they could have gotten any closer without taking their clothes off.

~_^

Which might explain why she got mad when I said mr clyburn would be the kind of teacher to make out with girls in the bathroom...

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Also Christin was there, and she said

"OHHHHHH I CANT BREATHE"

I think she's fine, no worries.

Also, today, in theater, we experienced a doom unlike any other.

Lizzy hit her head on PAMELA, the POLE.

LIZZY HAS KILLED NOT ONLY PAMELA, BUT HER OWN MIND.

::mind control::

Youwill take my goats Lizzy.

::end mind control::

Haha, she sprained her wrist tying goats.

More proof, ladies and gentlemen, that goats are going to cause World War III.

Then after, that,

Van Helsing 2: The Goat Vampire Legacy

THAT IS THE DOOM!

-Smurfy

(Haha, tricked you, this wasn't funny.)

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-20T10:10:55-05:00

Way to much to do.

No update today.

((HUMOR IS COMING TOMMOROW!))

((HAHA IM LYING))

The Bus: One CRAZY ride.

Smurfy — 2004-10-21T04:10:16-05:00

So, my bus.

The bus drivers name is Asheeka, yes.

Quite a ride, let me tell you.

So yesterday we pulled up beside the traffic median, and behold! A wreck occured!

One involving none other then the most incredibly rude and preppy person you will ever meet,

...

Morgan Lovelace.

It was cool.

Gotta tell you.

So this SUV stop,s right? Traffic.

So then this little honda civic comes plowing down the road at about 40, only slows down to about 25.

It just plows right into the back of the SUV, but see,

The civic had 5 people in it, and I'm pretty sure all 5 of them were on their cell phones.

The driver was anyway.

So, they pull off to the side of the raod, and the ciciv, like, blew a tire, bothe the headlights, and the front part, the hood, allll crumpled and smashed.

they pull off, and some of the girls are STILL on their cell phones, just-a giggling.

It made me sick, let me tell you.

Stupid preppy girls.

Then today, Jarrod was back!

AND his screwed up face!

his fac4e was still swollen fromt he fight the other day, after he chellneged the same people who beat him up last time to come back.

And they did.

And broke his nose.

So he comes to school with some crazy story, that changes alot.

I had at least 3 versions.

1) I tripped on the sidewalk after the fight

2) I tripped over a dog

3) I tripped over shoes and hit the doorknob, broke my nose

OOHHHH SHUTUP JARROD

haha, he looked hilarious.

-Smurfy

Play? Or anti-play?

Smurfy — 2004-10-21T09:10:13-05:00

So after spending all night just mindlessly jabbering with all sorta of drama geeks, I must say I am quuuiiite happy.

Also the ride home with Erin didn't hurt either.

Groovy music man.

Oh Cecilllllia, you're breaking my heart....>D

Good mood for once.

-Smurfy

Also,

Smurfy — 2004-10-21T09:10:38-05:00

Megan and kate suck at holding my hat and coat.

From the Mind of Michelle Cohen

Smurfy — 2004-10-21T11:10:13-05:00

Mind. In caps.

"So, we we're at the beach right? And we were having sandwiches for some reason, I don't know why, and I was like, Mom, like, can we get BAGELS? I don't like wheat bread...so, we went out to get bagels. My Mom was like, so, where do you think a bagel store is? And I was like, mom, bagel stores don't just appear at the beach. I don't even think they have bagel stores at the beach! No! not here! So my mom said, hey let's go to food lion!

And we did!

And I said, hey mom, Look! bagels!

So we bought like, TEN bagels, but you know, there was five of us. They were EXPENSIVE bagels too. but very very good bagels.

Then like, as we were leaving, we saw a sign that said

'Get your hott fresh bagels at Bagel Mart!', and it was like, right next door. Way cheaper.

But we already had bagels.

Ironic isn't it?"

For some reason, using the word bagel, and irony in the same story..is just...just..storytelling genius....

The football game: at a glance

Smurfy — 2004-10-22T10:10:13-05:00

1) OUTLAWED: No more hillside grooves

2) GAME: you must watch it, thats what we COME for right? NO Mrs. Assitant principal, you are WRONG.

3)POLICE: Accidentily pissed them off. We almost got arrested! (More on that LATER)

4) You can spell 5-letter words with your fingers.

5) I need coffee ice cream

6) I'm single.

Innnnnnnntresti...

Smurfy — 2004-10-22T11:10:43-05:00

I did this quiz because it wasn't the usual

"WHAT BRAND OF TOASTER ARE YOU" thing, but a rather sensible psychology type thing.

Very groovy

(STOLEN FROM KYYYYAT)

Advanced Big 45 Personality Test Results

Gregariousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	86%
Sociability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	58%
Assertiveness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	46%
Poise	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	58%
Leadership	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	66%
Provocativeness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Self-Disclosure	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	54%
Talkativeness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	82%
Group Attachment	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	26%
Extroversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	59%
Understanding	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	46%
Warmth	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	74%
Morality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	54%
Pleasantness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Empathy	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	66%
Cooperation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Sympathy	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Tenderness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	54%
Nurturance	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	58%
Friendliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	55%
Conscientiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Efficiency	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	38%
Dutifulness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Purposefulness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	42%
Organization	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	58%
Cautiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Rationality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	54%
Perfectionism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	38%
Happiness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	46%
Calmness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Moderation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	46%
Toughness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	46%
Impulse Control	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	42%
Imperturbability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Cool-headedness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Tranquility	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	58%
Emotional Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	45%
Intellect	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Ingenuity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Reflection	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Competence	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Quickness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Introspection	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	82%
Creativity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	58%
Imagination	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	62%
Depth	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	74%
Openmindedness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	66%

Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Factor	low score	high score
Gregariousness	quiet, reclusive	engaging, socially bold
Sociability	withdrawn, hidden	warm, open, inviting
Assertiveness	timid, gunshy	controlling, aggressive
Poise	uneasy around others	socially comfortable
Leadership	stays in background	prefers to lead
Provocativeness	modest, plays it safe	bold, uninhibited, cocky
Self-Disclosure	private, contained	very open and revealing
Talkativeness	quiet, stealthy, invisible	motor mouth, loud
Group Attachment	loves solitude	prefers to be with others
Understanding	insensitive, schizoid	respectful, sympathetic
Warmth	disinterested in others	supportive, helpful
Morality	break/ignore the rules	play by the rules
Pleasantness	aloof or disagreeable	gets along with others
Empathy	out of tune w/ others	in tune with others
Cooperation	competitive, warlike	agreeable, peaceful
Sympathy	socially inconsiderate	socially conscious
Tenderness	cold hearted, selfish	warm hearted, selfless
Nurturance	self pleasing, me first	people pleasing, me last
Conscientiousness	reckless, unscheduled	careful, planner
Efficiency	unreliable, lazy	finisher, follows through
Dutifulness	leisurely, derelict	strict, rule abiding
Purposefulness	inattentive, undisciplined	prepared, focused
Organization	relaxed, oblivious	detail oriented, anal
Cautiousness	impulsive, spendthrift	restrained, cautious
Rationality	irrational, random	direct, logical
Perfectionism	careless, error prone	detail obsessed
Orderliness	disorganized, messy	planner, clean, thorough
Stability	easily frustrated	calm, cool, unphased
Happiness	unhappy, dissatisfied	self content, positive
Calmness	touchy, volatile	even tempered, tolerant
Moderation	needs instant gratification	easily delays gratification
Toughness	hypersensitive, moody	thick skinned
Impulse Control	lacks self control	maintains composure
Imperturbability	highly emotional	emotionally contained
Cool-headedness	demanding, controlling	accommodating
Tranquility	emotionally volatile	emotionally neutral
Intellect	instinctive, non-analytical	intellectual, analytical
Ingenuity	lacks new ideas	innovative, novel
Reflection	unreflective, coarse	art and beauty lover
Competence	slow to understand/think	intellectual, brainy
Quickness	intellectually dependent	intellectually independent
Introspection	not self reflective	self searching
Creativity	dull headed	synthesizer, iconoclast
Imagination	practical, realistic	dreamer, unrealistic
Depth	lacks curiosity	mental explorer

mmmm..Smell that? That's exhaust.

Smurfy — 2004-10-23T09:10:36-05:00

Ain't life swell.

I have an idea!

From the back of this pickup truck, we'll gather for warmth, somehow carry on conversations about zombies and horror movies, investigate mysterious shelves, all the while dissing the stupid fat girl, and going to burger king just to screw with her.

What a night.

The grudge would have made it better.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-24T01:10:48-05:00

hahahahaha........

Smurfy — 2004-10-24T04:10:33-05:00

So I decided to challenege Michelle to a game of mini-golf since brittany's afraid of it.

Turns out, 18 holes later, the score is negative one to 23.

my lead!

I swear, I think Michelle Cohen is the funniest eprson I've ever met.

Especially when she's losing....badly..

So, it starts here, you know, the end of the world.

Smurfy — 2004-10-24T05:10:55-05:00

The end of the wolrd begins at GoodWill.

You know.

Clothes, appliances, used "Undergarments"

they've got it all.

Even terrible BEYOND b grade movies.

yesterday while looking for a hat, for harvey, the giant invisible rabbit, Blake and I wandered upon several wondorous titles.

Including

"Working out with Regis Philbin"

And the great title

"DOOM ON YOU"

This movie, entitled, Doom on you, doesn't seem to exist.

I have serached high and low on every movie/short film database, and this does NOT exist.

which entertains me.

I NEED that movie now..

According to the movie the terror organization known as "T.E.R.R.O.R." That's right, TERROR.

They had to disguise their name.

So, they are unleahing "Meks" onto the world.

And "SkyMeks".

And "GroundMeks"

And see, for 5 bucks, it would have been a better bargain then these 3 Atari 2600 games I bought for 6.26.

But yes, Doom on You.

Sounds like it would make a good movie to dub.

You know what I mean? Really does.

I'm GOING to do this.

DUBBBBBBB

but besides that, that regis philbin tape?

That, was freakin, SCARY.

he had his SHIRT off.

Anyone remember this song...MAN is it good..

Smurfy — 2004-10-24T06:10:16-05:00

AmFat and docile, big and dumb
They look so stupid, they aren't much fun
GCows aren't Amfun

They eat to grow, grow to die
Die to be et at the hamburger fry
Cows well done

Nobody thunk it, nobody knew
No one imagined the great cow guru
Cows are one

He hid in the forest, read books with great zeal
He loved Che Guevera, a revolutionary veal
Cow Tse Tongue

He spoke about justice, but nobody stirred
He felt like an outcast, alone in the herd
Cow doldrums

He mooed we must fight, escape or we'll die
Cows gathered around, cause the steaks were so high
Bad cow pun

But then he was captured, stuffed into a crate
Loaded onto a truck, where he rode to his fate
Cows are bummed

He was a scrawny calf, who looked rather woozy
No one suspected he was packing an Uzi
Cows with guns

They came with a needle to stick in his thigh
He kicked for the groin, he pissed in their eye
Cow well hung

Knocked over a tractor and ran for the door
Six gallons of gas flowed out on the floor
Run cows run!

He picked up a bullhorn and jumped up on the hay
We are free roving bovines, we run free today

We will Ffight for bovine Cfreedom
And Ehold our large heads Amhigh
We will Frun free with the CBuffalo, or Edie
Cows with [Am]guns

They crashed the gate in a great stampede
Tipped over a milk truck, torched all the feed
Cows have fun

Sixty police cars were piled in a heap
Covered in cow pies, covered up deep
Much cow dung

Black smoke rising, darkening the day
Twelve burning McDonalds, have it your way

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

The President said "enough is enough

These uppity cattle, its time to get tough"
Cow dung flung

The newspapers gloated, folks sighed with relief
Tomorrow at noon, they would all be ground beef
Cows on buns

The cows were surrounded, they waited and prayed
They mooed their last moos,
they chewed their last hay
Cows out gunned

The order was given to turn cows to whoppers
Enforced by the might of ten thousand coppers
But on the horizon surrounding the shoppers

Came the deafening roar of chickens in choppers

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

Those there, ye have the key!

Smurfy — 2004-10-25T09:10:47-05:00

"Well..."-

Smurfy

Haha. So true.

Smurfy — 2004-10-25T10:10:23-05:00

citylove2006: which means
citylove2006: FIVE AWKWARD SCENES

MMMMMM...Smells... COOKED BACON STRIPS.

Smurfy — 2004-10-26T06:10:38-05:00

What a day!

So, After I got on the bus today, Jarrod (the guy who frequently gets beat up because he challenges people to fights) announced that some guy had been pronouncing "comma" wrong.

And then fighted about it.

'Cause see, he's kinda stupid.

Then I got my cool class ring.

With it's cool..a...

I'll have pics!

Yes!

Pics!

Then mrs. hubbard got angry and said ARGH TWO PAGE ESSAY ABOUT STUFF THAT SMURFY DOESNT GET HAHAHAHAHA.

::shrugs::

Ah, school, you know.

I need to do that essay, I'm pretty sure.

I'll get to it!

stupid mysticissm....sism..si..csim..

cism...

And, also, this was the note attached to my vocabulary test:

"..I don't know what to do with this. This is terrible. You missed all 100 points. I really have no idea what to do with this. Do better next time"

I sort....a....um..Forgot the format

Stupid fergusson.

HORSE WOMAN.

But hey, today, we got new FLOOR HOCKEY sticks, and I got to slash some FEET.

Boy do I love floor hockey violence.

Except for kyle.

He's just crazy.

Stabbing me with his HOCKEY stick....JEEEEEEEZ

Also, I've got a good joke for you folks at home, in blog-land. Funniest thing I've seen all week.

They are changing the universal choking sign. The former was

But is now

AGAIN! IM INSANE WITH MINDFUL PLEASURE!

Smurfy — 2004-10-26T09:10:11-05:00

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-27T09:10:53-05:00

64 days left of the year..my my..how it flies, this time of ours.

..Life'll find you!

Smurfy — 2004-10-27T10:10:11-05:00

Life will KILL you, that's what I said....

Life will kill you!

Then you'll be dead...

Freaking essays.

Fergusson sucks.

Raining SkyFire: you put forth such a strong EFFORT
last waItz: oh crap
last waItz: shower
last waItz: forgot again
last waItz: brb
Raining SkyFire: roses are red
Raining SkyFire: violets are blue
Raining SkyFire: I'm the shower
Raining SkyFire: wanna come too? ~_^
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: good away message
last waItz: ROFL
Raining SkyFire: I knew you'd like that
last waItz: don't you mean..
last waItz: "i'm IN the shower"
last waItz is away at 10:26:21 PM.
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha
Auto response from last waItz: Raining SkyFire [10:24 PM]: roses are red, violets are blue.. I'm in the shower, wanna come too? ~_^

rofl teh smurfay!! brb shower

Raining SkyFire: I made the message...GOLD...

PLEASE NOT MY HAND

Smurfy — 2004-10-28T05:10:25-05:00

Crazy dream.

So we're on this crrrazy school bus, when al the sudden Steven Malaga jumps up from behind the drivers seat with a machine gun from scarface and kills the driver, then drives the bus into a pond, which for some reason has air in it, and you can float like your in space.

Steven: A murderous felon, or astronaut?

Well, ain't this dandy!

Smurfy — 2004-10-28T05:10:48-05:00

I managed to find 5 or 6 seconds where I wasn't doing things, and I could provide you all with an actual UPDATE!

snap!

Haha, then I forget everything I wanted to write.

....

Figures, doesn't it.

So I got invited to 3 parties this weekend, but I'm pretty sure I can only make one...which is dissapointing.

See, you go like, a month no partyage, then get hit in the face when you least suspect it.

It's like magic.

MAGIC ANTI-FATE.

I'm also awaiting the day when I no longer even make sense to MYSELF.

That, my friends, shall be magic.

So harvey continues to trudge along, I suppose.

Meagerly.

meagerly?

I suppose that's the correct SPELLURE.

I'm just too lazy, I know.

Got two act's to memorize..and...3 weeks to do it...

and we're off book

;-;!!!!

AH! FOOLISH BOOK!

Behold, the power of the enter key.

One day, while reading this, you're scroll bar is actually going to break.

Like, INSIDE the monitor, it'll just BREAK.

and look BROKEN.

_____

So, today, during english, they called up everyone who had made honor roll.

(Which means not me)

so, I watched in awe as 25-32 people from the class left, leaving a mere 11 to sit and ponder our own stupidity.

Which was, kinda fun, in some odd way.

Fergusson was like

"This work is just stupid. Let's just put it up for today, it's just a stupid worksheet anyway"

And I was like.

Word, fergy.

Word.

She still resembles a psychotic horse, however.

::cough::

____

AYE! During "THEATER ARTS II" today, we spent 40 minutes philosophonizing over how lee-anne should push her chari in at the breakfast table.

My "THEATER ARTS II" class is full of people who think way too much for their own good.

Subtext is great, and dandy.

Philisophizing over a chair is just stupid.

Curses!

WOAH CARS HERE MUST DEPART!

http://www.wketchup.com/

Woahz! kind of CRAZY! 98%!

Smurfy — 2004-10-28T05:10:25-05:00

> At the end of this, you are asked a question.
>
>
>
>>*
>>Answer it immediately Don't stop and think about it.
>>*
>>Just say the first thing that pops into your mind.
>>*
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>>Fun Test...This is kind of spooky!
>>*
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>>If you do not believe this, pass it around and you'll see.
>>*
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>>*
>>*Be sure to put in the subject line if you are among the 98% or
> the 2%
>>and send to everyone, including the person that sent it to you.
>>*
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>>Amazing test....just follow the instructions as quickly as
> possible.
>>*
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>>*Do not go to the next calculation before you have finished the
>>previous
>>one.
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>>You do not need to write or remember the answers, just do it using
>>your
>>mind.
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>>You'll be surprised.
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>>*Start:
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>>How much is :
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>>I know! Calculations are hard work but it's nearly over..
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>>Come on, one more...
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>>QUICK! THINK ABOUT A TOOL AND A COLOR!
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>>You have just thought about a red hammer, haven't you????
>>
>>If this is not your answer, you are among 2% of people who have a
>>different if not abnormal mind.
>>
>>98% of the folks would answer a red hammer while doing this
> exercise.

ha, omg ilu brittany.

Smurfy — 2004-10-28T11:10:32-05:00

One out of all smurfy's friends agree,

His blog is orgasmically good!

CONRAGTULATIONS PLAYER

Smurfy — 2004-10-29T07:10:34-05:00

NEW LAZINESS LEVEL AQUIRED:

DEAD LAWNMOWER BATTERY.

31,028 EXP. TO LEVEL 78

ATK DOWN 15

AGLTY DOWN 9

HP NONE

Brookes Party: Phases:: I've mentally seperated the party into sucky and non-sucky phases. ::shrugs

Smurfy — 2004-10-30T01:10:18-05:00

I've mentally seperated the party into sucky and non-sucky phases.

::shrugs::

Enjoy the laughter!

Phase one: Arrival- I arrived at brookes house at approximately 8:10, entering casually with my Dr. Freakenstein cape trailing behind me. Brooke's parents told me to go up the stairs, but I could hear the echoing laughter already.

As I walked into the room, phase two began

Phase Two: Wario Ware- I notied a GameCube immedietelly, then realized, with glee, that someone had brought wario ware. Someone gave up their controller to me, and I began what has to be the closest thing to "High" I've ever experienced. Eventually, after about 15 more minutes, people started trailing to the bonfire, eventually leaving just two people, me and a girl named Dana.

Phase Three: Acid for your thumbs- After playing a while with Dana, another guy came in, he imedietelly began to kick our mini-game playing heads to the ground, and chopping at them with a blunt axe. A girl in a "8-bit Theater" shirt soon joined us, making it a four person game of extreme FUNNESS. After about another 20 minutes, the guy and the 8-bit theater girl left, and kate and Carrie came into the mix. They got their tails beat off. With the same blunt axe. After about another 20 minutes, which should somehow total to an hour and 15 minutes, somehow, Carrie hit the power button, and suddenly, with a jerk, I realized I'd been playing that game for an hour and 15 minutes. We all immedietelly agreed that leaving the console and the acid trip for your thumbs was over, and we should leave in our brief moment of conciousness.

Phase Four: The sucking- we all traveresed down the steps to the bonfire, which ahd begun previously. I noted that since everyone left brookes room, about another 20 people had arrived, totalling to about 35-40, I suppose. This phase stretched for about 30 minutes, of me just making my regular stupid one-liners and walking about aimlessly between cliques. Blah.

Phase Five: Who's Line?- After witnessing david/brittany/stef drama, about 15 people migrated to the living room to watch an hour of who's line is it anyway. About the same time, Ryan Vestal took the rest of the bewildered children upstairs for..um..the quentin tarentino movie..Ah! "Resevoir Dogs". Almost POSITIVE I spelled it wrong. Anyway, by this point, about 7 or 8 people had told me I should leave my hair red. I like that suggestion.
Phase Six: The end of the beggining- Upon finding little to no conversation downstairs between anyone at all, I gave up on making conversation with anyone at all downstairs. At all! No conversation! Didn't seem to be worth it, you know. So I watched the last bit of "Resevoir Dogs" from the "EAR" scene, until the end, when Mr. Pink is the only survivor, ensuring a future sequel. I think Quentin Tarentino is the best driector of our day...man did that ..just..awesome!

Phase Seven: Emo music, bracelets, and the staring effect- After the movie, we all went to the living room, those not making out, and..reached..umm.."Party Nirvana". This was at approx. 12 AM. I called shortly after 12 to get my ride to come pick me up. The party was over in terms of much of anything besides chilling with emo music and brittany's bracelet. Which I spent more time with then Brittany for whatever reason. That's probably david and stefany's fault. Anyway, at abotu 12:30, I left, realizing I still hadn't eaten any food all night besides a plate of Salsa.

Phase Eight: This party...- I took a shower to wash out the red hair, drank some code red, and began to write about the events of the evening... I arrived at Brookes house at approximately 8:10....

Zelda Ad's

Smurfy — 2004-10-30T01:10:33-05:00

Equation for happiness

Smurfy — 2004-10-30T09:10:10-05:00

Scaring little children with frightning masks = VERY FUN

The best hell ever. DIE VEGANS! AND PETA!

Smurfy — 2004-10-30T11:10:42-05:00

Scientologists
Circle I Limbo

Geeks
Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

Democrats
Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

The New York Yankees
Circle IV Rolling Weights

The Pope
Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

River Styx

DMV Employees
Circle VI Buried for Eternity

River Phlegyas

Bill Gates
Circle VII Burning Sands

PETA Members
Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

Militant Vegans
Circle IX Frozen in Ice

Design your own hell

HAHA! CAPITALISM!

Smurfy — 2004-10-31T08:10:10-05:00

So, I decided earlier today, my next project is

"THE WORD ACCORDING TO SMURFY: AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY"

Release date: 2004 to 2019

Anywhere between, just have to start and stop being lazy.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-10-31T10:10:10-05:00

i heard this AWESOME song on the radio, but I do not know anything other then one line, that was like,

"its the la-la-la-la-la-lies of the living dead!"

NAME THAT TUNE?!

Pre-smurfy

Smurfy — 2004-10-31T11:10:48-05:00

I just came to realzie something that I'll post on later.

I think "Morgan", and "Smurfy" are two different people.

But in a non-schizophrenic sort of way

Like, ways of THINKING..or..something of that nature.

Not like

Hello SMURFY..is there someone INSIDE YOUR HEAD?

/...um...SOMETIMES..

Is it Captain Howdy?!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T01:11:25-05:00

Oh forget it,

I can't describe my thought on the smurfy thing without sounding psychotic.

Haha. Vengeful COFEE!

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T11:11:26-05:00

Man Accused of Poisoning Company's Coffee

SCHILLER PARK, Ill. (AP) - A man was accused of placing hazardous chemicals in his company's coffeepot, according to authorities. Kemarat Vathananand was angry at a vice president of Schiller Park-based Castle Metal Finishing Corp. who told him he could not drink coffee in the shop area, investigators said.

Vathananand, a pollution control operator who has worked at the company for 15 years, was charged Friday with attempted murder and unlawful tampering with food. A Cook County judge ordered Vathananand, 50, held on $100,000 bond.

Vathananand is accused of placing sodium dimethyldithiocarbamate, lead acetate and urine in the coffeepots. No one at the company became seriously ill, said Tom Stanton, a spokesman for the Cook County state's attorney's office.

Employees first noticed a bitter taste in the coffee three months ago, and bought new coffeepots, said Mike Marrazzo, a spokesman for Schiller Park Police. When that didn't help, an employee ran a test on a sample of coffee, and it came back positive for lead acetate, authorities said.

Schiller Park Police installed a hidden camera in mid-October, and just over a week later, Vathananand was captured on tape pouring something into the coffee maker, Stanton said.

haha. Libertarians are teh sux

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T11:11:38-05:00

Red- Bush

Blue- Kerry

Yellow- Nader

haha, look, the libertarian...er..libe.a...ah screw the spelling, they have less then NADER!

XD!

Why does this stupid JOURNAL always clip my PICTURES BLAST IT

haha

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T11:11:31-05:00

This election is going to take longer then the last one.

You watch!

Stupid lawyers.

Mysterious wonderment

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T12:11:17-05:00

So yesterday, I was walking along, when suddenly, out of the blue, this girl says to me, she says,

Dude, why is everything you write about in your blog about YOU. You're so SELF-ABSORBED.

Isn't that what a blog's for?

I inquired,

then she stated,

"You're a jerk"

WOOSH!

::drums play::

Who thinks it's time for a bowl of coffee ice cream to dwell over the idiocies of these poor children!

ha.

So, from now on, my blog will be about this guy named Martin from Canada.

Today, Martin woke up and ate a bowl of "BEAVER MIX", then went down to the pond, fished out a maple tree, and sacrificed it to the Beaver god of the full moon.

After this, he went back to bed, as there's nothing else to do in Canada.

haha

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T01:11:15-05:00

New header.

Vote smurfy.

Exit polls

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T09:11:45-05:00

VOTE BY GENDER	BUSH	KERRY	OTHER
Male (46%)	51%	47%	1%
Female (54%)	45%	54%	1%

As of 9:25

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T09:11:01-05:00

270 electoral votes needed to win


	155 Electoral Votes
VOTE %	53%
VOTE	11,945,734


112 Electoral Votes
46%	VOTE %
10,340,281	VOTE

15% precincts reporting - Updated: 9:25 p.m. ET

Although, Kerry still has not won Califnornia, which, against any odds at all, he will win.

and thats like, what, 40-some votes.

Also, it just came to my attention, that politcally speaking, my aprents have no idea whats going on. They just asked me to explain, for the 3rd time, what the electoral college is.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-02T09:11:20-05:00

BonziBuddyX: You know what'd be cool?
BonziBuddyX: If we got live feed of Kerry the minute finds out he lost.
mayflower27023: free porn robots?
Raining SkyFire: jhahhaha
Raining SkyFire: Boy
BonziBuddyX: "I'm meeeelting! MEEEEEEELTING!"
Raining SkyFire: XD!
mayflower27023: lol
BonziBuddyX: And then Teresa just turns into a bottle of ketchup.

Haha.:: Boy did I have fun with the groovy liberals today. ::sort of pokes kat with the kat-stick

Smurfy — 2004-11-03T04:11:20-05:00

Boy did I have fun with the groovy liberals today.

::sort of pokes kat with the kat-stick::

Haha. Bush wins.

One thing I gotta give to Kerry,

Smurfy — 2004-11-03T04:11:56-05:00

Is that he knew when to quit, instead of, say, demanding a recount. Then another recount. Then another recount. Saves your dignity, y'know.

I can't wait for 2008.

Kerry Brings White House Campaign to End

By MARY DALRYMPLE

BOSTON (AP) - Sen. John Kerry brought his long White House campaign to an end Wednesday, conceding the presidential election to George W. Bush and saying the time had come to ``begin the healing.''

``I'm sorry that we got here a little bit late and a little bit short,'' said a hoarse and stoic Kerry, noting that he had called Bush earlier at the White House and said they had a ``good conversation.''

``In America, it is vital that every vote count .. but the outcome should be decided by voters, not a protracted legal fight,'' Kerry said. ``I would not give up this fight if there was a chance that we would prevail.''

But Kerry also said that ``there won't be enough outstanding votes for us to win Ohio, and therefore we cannot win this election.''

``In this journey, you have given me the honor and the gift of learning from you,'' the senator said.

``I'm going to fight on for the people and the principles that I've stood for,'' said Kerry, who returns to the Senate to complete his term. Friends and admirers who joined him, running mate John Edwards and their families applauded lovingly during his 15-minute speech at this city's historic Faneuil Hall.

Preceding Kerry, Edwards said, ``well, it was a long night and a long morning. ... We will continue to fight for every vote. We know every vote matters in our America and we will honor each and every one of you. We didn't start fighting for you when this campaign began and we won't stop fighting for you when this campaign ends.''

With their families aligned in the front row, Kerry and Bush appeared before A mammoth painting by George P. A. Healy. Measuring almost 27 feet in width, it depicts a famous 19th century exchange between Daniel Webster and South Carolina Senator Robert Hayne about the federal Constitution's jurisdiction over the states.

Inscribed on the frame are Webster's famous words: ``Liberty and Union, Now and Forever.''

They had gathered earlier at Kerry's Beacon Hill home. His two-year campaign for the White House ended abruptly with the loss of the make-or-break state of Ohio in a close election.

Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, who campaigned heavily for Kerry over the past year, entered Kerry's house Wednesday morning with his wife, Victoria. Also spotted going inside were David Thorne, Kerry's longtime friend and former brother-in-law, stepson Andre Heinz, and brother Cameron Kerry.

Kerry called Bush shortly before 11 a.m. to concede defeat after his campaign determined Ohio was out of reach.

``Congratulations, Mr. President,'' Kerry said.

Hours earlier, Kerry huddled inside his home with advisers while running mate John Edwards addressed the nation from Copley Square. Both Democrats had campaigned until the last minute, mindful of the close finish four years ago.

``We've waited four years for this victory, we can wait one more night,'' Edwards, standing outside on a cold, drizzly night, told supporters still awake in the wee hours of the morning.

Advisers later said the campaign just wanted one last look at the uncounted ballots in Ohio, where Bush held a 136,000-vote advantage. The state's 20 electoral votes sealed victory for Bush.

In 2000, Bush sweated out a 36-day recount before a Supreme Court ruling awarded him Florida and the White House.

Kerry spent the campaign's final weeks going after Bush with a steady stream of criticism over his decision to wage war in Iraq and his push for costly tax cuts the Democrat said were irresponsible.

The four-term Massachusetts senator worked to tap into voters' pessimistic frame of mind, evident in exit polls, which showed them worried about new terrorist attacks, job losses and the war in Iraq.

The Democrat seized on three televised debates as his best opportunity to make these arguments to his largest audience, and his support ticked up after he delivered three solid performances.

Odd things today

Smurfy — 2004-11-03T04:11:03-05:00

Moving onward to actual smurfy-type news. Haha, yes, news about me. HOW SELF ABSORBED!

The Canadian guy, he's dead now anyway. Nuclear Beaver ate him.

::shrugs::

So, this morning, during the announcements this odd voice of Sarah Mcmannis once again crushed the airwaves with her droll voice..um..thing..

But then this odd thing came across after all the other announcements

"Also,"

She said,

"Let it be known that Lee Hill is now single"

::click::

I was like...

Woaaaaah SNAP.

Sarah got called to the office, and through my gossip enyclopedia, I suppose, from what I heard, she wont be doing the announcements..um..ever again. But I'm not sure about that.

Turns out they mistook sarah for kate, and tried to bust HER though.

Crazy.

Then, me and Kate owned in theater.

YOU BABBLING OLD WITCH!

::RAWR::

We did a good enough job that carlos had to shut HIS mouth and accept that we roxored.

which we did.

Except for that blasted pink rabbit, which carlos kept swinging in the air.

But hey, who carez, yo.

I also had an enlightenening conversation with Michelle Cohen. About how she makes the phone, FUN!

Also Jaclyns hair is not blonde. It's NOT. NOT NOT NOT.

And April doesn't like Mr. Clyburn either. Thats a GOOD thing!

And hey, look, I can remember my whole english packet....

Hey, too bad.

Smurfy — 2004-11-03T10:11:24-05:00

Half-way terrible

Almost well.

It's been broken thrice before,

It shall be broken three times more.

I long for the day I find my cure! the cure will find me, of this I'm sure...

The cure will find me....three times more.

I'm still me.

Well,

Smurfy — 2004-11-04T04:11:56-05:00

The mystery behind the emotion is revealed only by the face behind the mask.

The mask never leaves.

Well, odd day. Looks like I have enough civics project to go around for everyone.

Wanna join!?

IT'LL BE FUN!

Trust me, you're missing out.

...

Freakin' class.

Femi: "Well, you should watch who you TALK to" (in refernce to Laurel tell her to do more work on the project.)

Femi: "Because YOU don't know who you're messing with. I'm FEMI."

An argument between Femi and Laurel yesterday.

Classic.

Boy.

Smurfy — 2004-11-04T04:11:54-05:00

Yeah, you're telling me.

So, we walked into theater class with Hubbard yelling as usual, then isued the creed

"Move to somehwere you've never sat before"

Of course, halgf the poeple just moved to the other side of someone they were stting beside.

I moved to the back, away from the spotlight, so I could relish on my indistinct5 thoughts and sleep.

However, we spent the next 40 minutes handing out D-1's because hubbard was pissy.

Boy do I love Theater.

I couldn't sleep either.

Somone SAW me.

;-;!!

Seriously!

But hey, we're A-OK.

Unfortunetelly, I didnt think we were rearranging the seats.

Mine suxurz yo.

I have to go wath this video entitled

LEGISLATURE: FOUNDATION OF SUPREME DEMOCRACY now.

Personnaly, I'd rather be wathing

"Workin out, with Regis Philbin!"

And seriously, dude,

That tape EXISTS.

NCSA: ROUND TWO

Smurfy — 2004-11-04T09:11:58-05:00

So I get a call today.

Turns out, the guys from school of the arts are doing another movie.

They say, "Everyone was was an extra or anything is being aqsked. It'll be way awesome if you can come"

I agree,

"Great, we'll have details on it later."

I hang up and cheer!

More awesome film school people.

Isn't that AWESOME.

Yes smurfy, it sure is.

Maybe this time, I'LL get to beat someone up..instead of...me..getting...kicked around..for awhile.

KARMA!

Smurfy — 2004-11-05T11:11:58-05:00

GAH! When the heck is my Karma going to catch up with me.... It certainly isn't hurrying.

Oh FORGET it.

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T12:11:06-05:00

I just FORGOT it.

That's to my memory, let this song live on forever.

It's forgotten!

MYSTERY

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T10:11:28-05:00

'Mystery Candidate' Wins Without Campaign

By BEN FOX

SANTA ANA, Calif. (AP) - Steve Rocco didn't file a candidate statement or mount a campaign for the school board. He's unknown to teachers and the district and only barely known to his neighbors. Nonetheless, the man being called a ``mystery candidate'' easily beat an opponent who is active, and relatively well known, in the Orange Unified School District. Now all that's left is to find him.

``Absolutely nobody, but nobody has seen this guy,'' said Paul Pruss, a middle school teacher and the president of the union. ``The whole thing is just bizarre.''

Rocco provided little information about himself in his candidate filings. He ignored mail from district officials and the teachers' union during the campaign. When the PTA sent him an invitation to a candidate forum, the letter came back unopened.

Rocco ran for mayor of Santa Ana in 2000 and raised eyebrows then as well. He declined to provide personal information or to discuss the campaign, and showed up at a candidate forum dressed in camouflage and sunglasses. He came in last place, with 12 percent of the vote.

What might have helped him this time around was that he identified himself as a writer/educator on the ballot, though he offered no proof of those occupations.

``Not knowing anything more, most people voted for the educator/writer over the park ranger,'' said John Hanna, an attorney who ran successfully against an equally elusive Rocco two years ago for a seat on a local community college district.

No one came to the door Friday at Rocco's home southeast of Los Angeles, where he lives with his bedridden parents. The front gate of the house is adorned with a fading Johnny Cash record album cover and 10 small American flags hang in the yard. Neighbors said they see him occasionally, usually on a bicycle.

He is 53 and was born in Italy, according to his voter registration, where he declined to state his party affiliation. The candidate did not respond to media requests for interviews during the campaign and didn't bother with a ballot statement outlining his platform.

If he shows up to the monthly meetings of the district, Rocco will receive $750 per month. But officials are wondering what they will do if he is as scarce in office as he was during the campaign.

He will be one of seven board members in charge of setting policy for a district that has a budget of $230 million and serves nearly 32,000 students at 42 schools in Orange and surrounding cities.

The union endorsed Rocco's opponent, Phil Martinez, a park ranger who has three children in the district, is president of the PTA at his kids' school and is active with the Boy Scouts.

Still, Rocco, who has no children and whose job is uncertain, won with nearly 54 percent of the vote.

Martinez raised contributions, attended forums and sent out a political mailing to homes of voters in the district - none of which Rocco did.

Hanna, who has followed local politics for 30 years, dismissed one scenario that has been suggested, that voters chose the non-Hispanic name over Martinez.

``This is just one of the rough edges in our electoral system, where the voters can elect someone they know nothing about,'' he said.

Reallllly

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T10:11:25-05:00

I swear, once this play "Harvey" ends, I'll start actually updgating again

But hey! If you want to see smurfy do some acting stop by west forsythe at 6:30ish on either the 18th, 19th, or 20th of This month man. like, 5 bucks a ticket or something like that.

It'll be GREAT.

Plenty of invisible Rabbit's for EVERYONE.

I gurantee it™

..Holy...CRAP

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T01:11:45-05:00

Thanks to Ben, I was able to login to his hyperspace starwars.com account and watcht he trailer for episode III.

When it ended, I was speechless, and I began to sob and yell uncotrollably.

My freinds,

This is one

Hott

Movie.

Trailer Posters and exorcist movies

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T01:11:57-05:00

I am not fully convinced that i want to see Excorcist III again.

I think it is one of the deepest and most philosophy ridden movie I've ever seen, with subtext that will blwo your head off. Listen to this stuff.

BonziBuddyX: Father Morning IS Deus Ex Machina.
Raining SkyFire: O_O
Raining SkyFire: No!
BonziBuddyX: Yes!
Raining SkyFire: Impossible!
BonziBuddyX: Alright, dude, let's be reasonable.
BonziBuddyX: The Exorcist III was great.
BonziBuddyX: But the ending was a total sell-out.
BonziBuddyX: Or, mostly, at least.
Raining SkyFire: hmmm
Raining SkyFire: I can give you that
Raining SkyFire: it was
Raining SkyFire: But, leaving out that small portion
BonziBuddyX: Also, i'm still confused about the entire Gemini Killer thing.
BonziBuddyX: When I watched it last sunday, I noticed that right before Father Morning enters the cell, 'Karras' says "I must defend my son, my Gemini".
Raining SkyFire: o_o
Raining SkyFire: I don't remember that
Raining SkyFire: that's nifty
Raining SkyFire: What would that mean...
Raining SkyFire: hmm..
BonziBuddyX: Yeah, and the book..
BonziBuddyX: Alright, the Gemini killer's motive was to shame his evangelic father.
BonziBuddyX: In the book, we found out it's because his father was abusive, and drove James's brother(!) out of his mind.
BonziBuddyX: Which eventually lead to his death.
BonziBuddyX: But, anyway, at one point during the book, we hear the stuttering voice of Thomas Vennemaun (the brother) through "Karras"s mouth.
BonziBuddyX: Then, later..
BonziBuddyX: Alright, you know when the old lady saved Julie from the Posessed Mental Patient?
Raining SkyFire: hmm
Raining SkyFire: Yes
BonziBuddyX: Well, of course, that one part was cut out of the book.
BonziBuddyX: Kinderman just finds the shears in the bag, without any split-second pullaways.
Raining SkyFire: aw
Raining SkyFire: how depressing
BonziBuddyX: He returns to the hospital to discover (eventually) that the Gemini Killer's father died of a stroke, and Man in Cell 11 started yelling out "HE'S FINISHED!" about the time it happened.
BonziBuddyX: But before he finds out about this, he enters the cell (The Man was yelling out his name) and speaks with "Karras".
BonziBuddyX: That's where a monologue starts, part of which was in the movie.
Raining SkyFire: man thats hard to put together
Raining SkyFire: how you make this stuff make sense I'll never quite grasp
BonziBuddyX: That's where he explains how he got in Karras's body (without the HE WILL NEVER GET OUT, like I said).
BonziBuddyX: Here's where the big change happens.
BonziBuddyX: Aside from the entire existance of Father Morning, this might be the biggest change in Book to Movie.
BonziBuddyX: The Man asks "Dont you believe me lieutenant?" To which he of course replies "no".
BonziBuddyX: That's when The Man starts acting scared. He says that if Kinderman doesnt believe that he is not Karras, then Tommy won't leave. "He'll just stay here", he says.
Raining SkyFire: hmm..
BonziBuddyX: Kinderman decides to say "I believe you". That's when The Man slumps back against the wall, and as his eyes roll up into his head, we hear the stuttering voice of Thomas Vennamaun saying: "I l-l-l-l-love you, J-J-J-Jimmy". A little corny, yes, but you must remember his brother was retarted when he was alive.
BonziBuddyX: Kinderman then leaves, and thinks he's gone off to kill again.
BonziBuddyX: But Nurse Spencer informs him that The Man in Cell 11 lives no more.
Raining SkyFire: o_o!
Raining SkyFire: woah.
Raining SkyFire: That is...just..
Raining SkyFire: Man that is some deep crazy stuff
BonziBuddyX: Yeah.
Raining SkyFire: Just..woah.
BonziBuddyX: I mean, maybe the Demon realized all the people he wanted to kill fit the Gemini motif (names with the letter 'K'), and decided to take that on to freak out Kinderman.
BonziBuddyX: But even if that was the case, why would he abandon the body of Karras when the father died?
BonziBuddyX: Oh, maybe because it would no longer make sense..
BonziBuddyX: Hm.
BonziBuddyX: But then why the stuttering, semi-conflict between James and Thomas?
Raining SkyFire: Good heavens,
Raining SkyFire: And the sad thing is
Raining SkyFire: I'm sure if youe xamined it close enough,
Raining SkyFire: you'd probably be able to answer all of those questions
Raining SkyFire: there seems to be alot..of...ah..
Raining SkyFire: Behind the back motives, all that stuff
BonziBuddyX: Yeah.

Tonight...

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T07:11:24-05:00

Was, just simply, "Better"

I feel alright!

Almost groovy!

So, let's, um, review.

Tonight, at deep dark, the two freshies said it was too dark for them to walk, so I went, and megan carroll did too. Realizing I couldn't be as much of a perv as I really am, I decided to just try my best and walk, even though it was pitch black..

OHHH the missed opprutunities!

But anyway, we got to the end of the sidewalk, and then all three of them got inc ars and left, and I was like

W..w.a..wait a second...oh MAn why does this ALWAYS happen.

::looks back into the 4 mile walk back to the auditorium in the pitch black no light area.

Curse my freaking luck.

Thusly, smuryf walked back in the darkness. Oh great shame!

Then I realized my CD player had pasued while playing "I only want you" byt he eagles of death metal for a full 45 minutes, I suppose.

Thusly, my battery was screaming in pain, and I had to kill it.

The battery is dead.

Mourn, weep, cry for the lost power.

YES

Smurfy — 2004-11-06T09:11:36-05:00

You Are a Snarky Blogger!

You've got a razor sharp wit that bloggers are secretly in love with! And that's why they read your posts as often as they can!

What kind of blogger are you?

So, I was talking to Leigh right.

Smurfy — 2004-11-07T12:11:50-05:00

And I met her roomates, via AIM TALK function,

Apparently, she has two roomates

Roomate 1: Ashley. Ashley talks, floats, whatever. She whipsers frequently, and spends a good deal of timewalking sneaky-like from room to room.

Roomate 2: Boyfriend. Some guy. He just popped in and said "Um..hello" I said, HAHAHAHA. HI! Then Leigh said, aw you said hi to him, and I said, yeah..um..some guy..And then he said "Ha, some guy? more like, boyfriend.." So his name forever was boyfriend. Even though he's not a boyfriend..Hey, who cares.

Leigh. Notably, the most groovy person, (Mostly for the car)...(Which is actually very not good colored). It amazes me that people born 4 years apart always watched the same cartoons as kids. Isn't it crazy! So, for like, an hour and a half, we somehow had a conversation that involved ugly women, Poochie, mutant football league, heathcliff, gumby, ...ugh..care bears..the smurfys..gummi bears..all that crazy stuff....I never said care bears.

She lies.

frequently...

What?

I said nothing.

Also I know Leigh's future, in Christmas presents.

What a rush

Smurfy — 2004-11-08T08:11:22-05:00

So we had our um....uh..whats the word..

Speaker..guy come to drama club today.

Did a cool little segment on directing and stage combat. And boy did I learn some stage combat. I learend how to do a ...um..Heck, I'll just call it a "Walker Texas Ranger" punch, and a cool hair grab.

HAIR GRAB GET!

So, after that, I milled around the trailer for awhile, listening to Blake and Kate witht heir usual rounds of "haha smurfy's gay" and the usual "Haha smurfy's single" stuff. But, pulling through with an incredible breakthrough, was the fact that I was physically able to interact with Brittany and Brooke for the firs ttime, since, oh, say, October or so.Very Nice.

Me and Brooke just pretended to beat the crap out of each other around some woman, who just looked really odd and trotted out the door, peaking in mysteriously.

Haha.

Crazy woman.

Also, Kate and I owned Theater Arts today.

owned it.

Biology? Ha.

Smurfy — 2004-11-08T08:11:41-05:00

Now I lay me down to study, I pray the Lord I won't go nutty. If I should fail to learn this junk, I pray the Lord I will not flunk. But if I do, don't pity me at all, Just lay my bones in the dorm hall. Tell my Prof I did my best, Then pile my books upon my chest. Now I lay me down to rest, And pray I'll pass tomorrow's test. If I should die before I wake, That's one less test I'll have to take!

I am so screwed.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-09T07:11:08-05:00

Majorly very much better day.

It's easier to remember your lines when your with such groovy people! or person!

BAD POETRY! BAD!

Smurfy — 2004-11-09T09:11:59-05:00

I opened up a mysterious folder enclosed on a mysterious floppy disk and discovered a document labeled

"Smurfy's Poetry"

After reading the contents, I wanted to vomit. Badly.

After one turns a few years older, his poetry gets a few years younger.

And in a bad immature who the heck wrote this ansgty garbage sort of way.

::burns:::

Short sara is the bomb.

Smurfy — 2004-11-09T10:11:16-05:00

faux opaque: 'awesome' reminds me of dinosaurs
Raining SkyFire: o_o!
Raining SkyFire: I dont have one for that
faux opaque: well well well
faux opaque: ohhh goodnesss
faux opaque: i scanned my doggie
faux opaque wants to directly connect.
faux opaque is now directly connected.
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha
Raining SkyFire: XD

Warren ZEVON.

Smurfy — 2004-11-10T07:11:35-05:00

knock-knock-knockin' on heaven's door...

(The warren zevon version you very very wrong children)

Noir.

Smurfy — 2004-11-10T10:11:51-05:00

There are certain dates in your life, certain feelings, certain emotions...

Certain things, that no matter how insignificant they seem at other times...

Can just overwhelm you in others.

And no matter how old they grow, no matter how soaked in pointless teenage drama they are, you can feel how awesome and spectacular those things are.....

And how forever and ever after them, you can recall with perfect detail, all those little things that make life so....story-like.

So much like a bunch of criss-crossing stories, that someday, sometime, will all find their perfect ending.

It's us, it's us.

It's our story,

It's our narrative,

It's our lives.

Very awesome, just hold back when he falls....don't laugh too hard.

Smurfy — 2004-11-11T09:11:39-05:00

I had a wonderful time being there tonight, and you have no reason at ALL to be nervous, not a bit!

I think you did a marvelous job, and you'll only prove me correct tommorow. We must do that again sometime!

Hmmm

Smurfy — 2004-11-11T10:11:51-05:00

Jason also requested that i tell everyone that his computer is gone. So he can't soeak to anyone now.

Like,

he went home,

and it was just Gone.

So, yes, that was his request. Enjoy.

Oh me oh myyyyy

Smurfy — 2004-11-12T11:11:25-05:00

Such a fantasticrific performance by the understudious cast!

It puts s shimmer of hope in my heart for our play, an energy I havent had since waaay early september, or, auditions even..

I'm going to rawr the crowd, you see.

For once,

I'm going to go over my lines every night now.

I must must must not have ti improv, for I will surely not..um..improv well.

Unless it involves eagulls, and my seeing-eye glasses.

Brittany is a silent film star, I assure you.

Trust me, I have the eye.

The question of the year.

Smurfy — 2004-11-13T01:11:26-05:00

Coming soon to a blog near you...

Do you like your smurfy GLASSES, or NONGLASSESED.

Mmmmm....

Smurfy — 2004-11-13T01:11:07-05:00

Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
Birds singin? in the sycamore trees
Dream a little dream of me

Say nighty-night and kiss me
Just hold me tight and tell me you?ll miss me
While I?m alone and blue as can be
Dream a little dream of me

Stars fading but I linger on dear
Still craving your kiss
I?m longin? to linger till dawn dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

(instrumental break)

Stars shining up above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "i love you"
Birds singin? in the sycamore trees
Dream a little dream of me

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

Yes, dream a little dream of me

Haha. Overdone quiz.

Smurfy — 2004-11-13T01:11:35-05:00

Stolen from everyone. Including you. yes. YOU.

TEN Random Things About Me:

10. I enjoy the smell of spray paint.

09. I think randomness is a virtue

08. I failed a civics test today that I wrote. Which is to say, I MADE the quiz, then I FAILED it.

07. irritating dumb people makes me happy.

06. Irritating dumb people are annoying.

05. I think every movie should have a zombie in it

04. I love brocolli

03. When I beat Super Mario RPG, I cried for like an hour.

02. I often feel like I'm a very out of place person

01. Squirrel.

NINE Places I've Visited:

09. Hmm..Grand Canyon

08. Texas

07. Canada

06. Daytona

05. Disney world (too much rain)

04. Arizona

03. Wilmington

02. South Carolina

01. California

EIGHT Things I want to do before I die:

08. Go to Japan.

07. Learn Japanese (AFTER I visit japan, of course)

06. Sing something

05. Act professionally on stage or camera

04. Direct something without it sucking

03. Write the novel I've had in my had for umpteen years, The Last Sword (lame!)

02. Screenwrite

01. Eventually stop being single for some extended amount of time.

SEVEN Ways to win my heart:

07. Don't be one of thsoe popel who are like "Oh no! you touched my arm! I HATE that!". Smurfy is a touchy-feely person.

06. Don't be stubborn. I have enough of that

05. Joke around

04. be able to have a serious thought once in awhile to compensate for mine.

03. Be positive with all my negativeness

02. Flirt BACK

01. Listen

SIX Things I believe in:

06. ....harvey.

05. Human idiocy

04. Peace

03. War

02. Friendships, and losing friendships.

01. God

FIVE Things I'm afraid of:

05. dying

04. working alone in the church I clean. I can't tell all the things that happen in that church..

03. Being alone

02. absolute quiet

01. my imagination

FOUR of my Favorite Items in my bedroom:

04. GameCube

03. CD Player

02. cool asian hand-woven Yin-Yang dragon quilt

01. Couch

THREE Things I do everyday:

03. Whine

02. Pray

01. Put things off

TWO Things I am trying not to do right now:

02. Sound like an emotional idiot

01. ignore my IM's from Brittany, who is cackling about a new mindsay icon. Yes. Cackling.

ONE Person I want to see right now:

01. Ah...These are the questions that always make me not want to answer.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-14T02:11:31-05:00

Advice:

Nyquil, is not meant to be taken during the day.

Ever.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-14T09:11:54-05:00

Sickness equals new header.

MY MIND!

Smurfy — 2004-11-15T10:11:22-05:00

There is no way I am ever going to live without eating for 11 hours.

Freakin' clip-on bowtie..

1984: CodeName Harvey: Big Brother is your life.

Smurfy — 2004-11-17T07:11:02-05:00

I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I...love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey....I...love..Harvey..I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey. I love Harvey.....

I love Harvey.

...

Smurfy — 2004-11-17T10:11:36-05:00

Oh Come ON, have NONE of you ever read 1984! I even gave away the book!

Peooople.

Anyway.

Practic tonight was so amazing.

I......am..so excited..

ITS SHOWTIME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

Woah!

Smurfy — 2004-11-18T04:11:54-05:00

It's been...what..8 weeks..

EIGHT...

3 months..

And tonight, I shall dance!

Except I won't!

I'll be acting!

....Wow.

Smurfy — 2004-11-18T10:11:17-05:00

....

The show.

The show, was...

Beyond reasoning, the msot spectacular thing ....

I need to smile and walk away.

The applause, made my year.

And the people, especially those awesome red haired ones on the front row.

...

I am so happy!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-18T10:11:18-05:00

Now if we can just get over the friday curse...

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-19T05:11:52-05:00

Woah!

So, I'm in gym right

And these freshmen girls are sitting around doing freshmen things,

and David yells something about smurfy, and suddenly, all the girls look at me and go

Wait...YOUR smurfy?

And I said..umm...Yes?

They then went on this talking-escapade where some of these things were said

"I've heard so much about you!"

"I can't believe I met smurfy!"

"Woah! It's really smurfy!"

Don't look at me, I'm as confused as you are.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-19T10:11:50-05:00

...Well.

The friday curse was way broken.

So, last night

Smurfy — 2004-11-20T04:11:37-05:00

Well, the fretting about the curse of the second show was well worn, but not well recieved!

We triumphed, and managed to make an even better show friday then thrusday.

When I came out, I got a standing ovation.

That, in all it's shortness, was well worth every bit of the endless frustration.

Every single BIT.

Plus, Leigh gave me this cool care bear thing, Michelle gave me flowers, and short sara and katie gave me flowers..and also this decapitated barbie doll head.

The one from her blog, I think.

I got scared of the doll head and ran away, but the other stuff was groovy.

Acting rocks.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-21T06:11:15-05:00

"Hello! excuse me young man"!

And older woman addressed me,

"I want you to know how much I loved your performance, it was amazing. your gestures and expressions were perfect"

I answered,

"Well thankyou! I'm glad you enjoyed it!"

She replied,

"Well, I certainly did. I can even compare this to the original, I saw it"

I exclaimed,

"The one with James Stewart, really, like, live?"

"The one and only" she answered, then added,

"You know, you acted alot like him. I have seen alot of plays boy, and let me tell you, you're going somewhere"

To have someone who actually saw jimmy stewart perform tell me I was COMPARABLE...to JAMES STEWART..is like...

...Wow.

Surprise

Smurfy — 2004-11-21T06:11:41-05:00

Smurfy: "Hey, brittany look at this, I got a TEXT MESSAGE"

Brittany: "Maaaah"

Smurfy: "You and your stu--"

Zack: "WOAH!"

((Large explosion sounding noise)

Carlos: "Oh..No..."

((Watches the deer struggle to climb to it's feet and struggle off, after flying backwards 20-30 feet))

Smurfy: "Ah..a...w..((instantly gets flashbacks))

Brittany and Kate mumble to themselves in shock for a moment, we pull into KFC, and notice Zach's grill is gone, and the front end of his car is shattered. Bits of the deer stick into the hood.

An intresting introduction, to a very intresting night, by all means,

Very intresting.

Deer are very frightning things.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-21T06:11:03-05:00

If I sound egotistical and conceited in my last few Harvey posts, feel free to tell me so.

It wasn't intended, however.

Why do these things HAPPEN

Smurfy — 2004-11-22T06:11:18-05:00

So there was this guy at drama club today, Chad Edwards, doin' this cool workshop on stuff.

..annd......stuff.

Also, I realized, if we don't stop quoting Harvey lines soon, we're all going to die.

So for the weird little thing that happened today.

I walked into the gym, ready to go change out, etc, when i noticed we werent dressing out.

I inquired as to why, and the following explanation was given.

We were not allowed into the boys locker room, because some kid had gone in there and taken a crap in the middle of the floor, and apparently smeared it all over the walls and the floor and the lockers, then when everyone came in to change back into their clothes, people vomited all over the place.

So,

it's off limits today.

I nodded

Of course,

Sounds rational to me!

"So this was the spot, right Mr Elliott?"

Smurfy — 2004-11-23T04:11:13-05:00

Mr. Elliott died,

And asheeka moved to new york.

Awkward.

Forgotten, but...not gone

Smurfy — 2004-11-23T05:11:37-05:00

You'd love to run home, but you know, you live in a world that's best left forgotten...

Broadway is dark tonight!

See the young man sitting in the old men's bar,

waiting for his turn to die?

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-24T04:11:45-05:00

FLAME THROWING SPIDER MONKIES

Idiot ghetto kids.

Smurfy — 2004-11-24T05:11:41-05:00

Boy, we need an update with substance, you know? Well, today, I reaffirmed my disgust towards a very bad thing.

I learned, yet again,

Ghetto kids suck.

Ghetto kids who yell random expletives accross lunch rooms suck more.

Ghetto kids who yell in my ears suck even more then that.

So today, when I was trying to find my bus, There was a group of loudmouthed girls talking about something and yelling behind me, seemingly following me, so I turned around and said

"You idiot ghetto kids, shut your stupid LOUD MOUTHS"

As I continued to trot to the front of the bus line, I heard more death threats then I think I ever have heard directed solely towards me in my life, yet I felt so HAPPY!

And better yet, the even shutup!

I was like, well, golly jeepers smurfy, this actually works.

Works as long as they cant see your face/don't know who you are.

Boy was that satisfying.

I'm going to go have plastic surgery now.

Hey, who doesnt enjoy a good quiz.

Smurfy — 2004-11-25T01:11:06-05:00

Ah..I'm a sucker for these stupid things.

FIRSTS
First best friend: ..hm..JT from pre-school I guess.
First car: >D the Smurfmobile. '98 Grand Am SE, BLUE!
First real kiss: haha, no.
First break-up: Never really "BEEN TOGETHER", so no real break up.

First screen name: MJHEDGEHOG (I was NINE, come on.)
First self purchased album: Smash Mouth: Astro Lounge

First funeral: Mrs. Church's first husband, I think.

First pets: I still have my first kitty, his name is kitty, I got him when I was 2. he's..old!
First piercing/tattoo: none

First credit card: None, never getting one. BAD.
First true love: None.

First enemy: Hmmmmmmm......

First big trip: When I was little, my Dad was in Nascar, so I went around the country many many many times.
First music you remember hearing in your house: um..probably christmas music, or "POPCORN"

LASTS
Last car ride: Um, earlier tonight, I guess..it wasn't in the smurfmobile..;-;..
Last kiss: ..Whoever I kissed last after Harvey.
Last good cry: ..whew...been awhile.
Last library book checked out: Something by Harry Charles Whedbee
Last movie seen: ..hm..."HARVEY"
Last beverage drank: Code red

Last food consumed: Arby's roast beef..twooooo of them

Last crush: haha, right. Um..whew...um..alot..of people.

Last phone call: ...No idea.
Last time showered: few hours ago.
Last shoes worn: same ones I wear every time I wear shoes.
Last item bought: um...food...maybe,.
Last annoyance: Math.

Last time wanting to die: Ah, we all get emo!
Last time scolded: ...hahahaha....like..um..now.

r e l a t i o n s h i p s
01. who are your best friends? I have never/will probably never do that best friend thing. I'm so..out of place, everywhere. I'm so..myself. But the best FRIENDS that I have, would be, Jason, Brittany, Jaclyn, Brookeish, Kate, Michelle, Um..whew, alot of people.

02. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?...No. I complain about it alot, but I really don't need to be in a relationship to feel satisfied. Plus, people get turned off by the fact that I'm me. I'm kind of irritating.

f a s h i o n | s t u f f
01. where is your favorite place to shop? ..Shopping...U_U...ah..GameStop! EB games!
02. any tattoos or piercings? Nah.

s p e c i f i c s
01. do you do drugs? Nah.
02. what kind of shampoo do you use? Um..a..uh..some..2 in..1..something
03. what are you most scared of? Probably...hmm...Aloneness. Death isn't that terribly frightning. I've been close to it many times.

04. what are you listening to right now? "Talk to me" by the stills. (TEH INDIE HOTTNESS)
05. where do you want to get married? a churchish place, I suppose.

06. how many buddies are online right now? 51/191

07. what would you change about yourself?. My nerdy physique! ^_^!

f a v o u r i t e s
01. color: Bluuuuuue blue blue sweet wonderful tasty blue.
02. food: Spgahetti! MM!
03. boys' names: James, Wiley, Charlie, Avery
04. girls' names: Racheal, Joy, Francis
05. subjects in school: theater, business, um..the classes I can sleep in..

06. animals: Dogs.

07. sports: Gah..I dont play any, jocks are idiots, but...um..uh..football I suppose

08. perfume: Um..comething..uh..I forgot what it's called..but it smells good on teh ladehs.
09. cologne: never wear any.

h a v e | y o u | e v e r
01. given anyone a bath?o_o...No.
02. smoked? Nah.
03. bungee jumped? Want too!
04. made yourself throw up? I have no urge to purge.
05. skinny dipped? Yesh. You forget my redneckness.
06: ever been in love? ..No.

07. made yourself cry to get out of trouble? Hmm..Perhaps in my younger days!
08. pictured your crush naked? ~_^

09. actually seen your crush naked? Nah.
10. cried when someone died? Who hasn't.

11. lied? Who hasn't
12. fallen for your best friend? Whew. Yeah. Bad.

13. been rejected? Maaaaany times
14. rejected someone? ah, yeah.

15. used someone? Too many times.

16. done something you regret? I don't look back with regret, just want for a different outcome. It's different, trust me!

c u r r e n t
clothes: Blue jeans, one sock, blueish looking boxers, looking for my other sock, a grey old shirt, and one finger glove, because it's cool.
music: Ah...EAGLES OF DEATH METAL RAWR.
make-up: ..Sureeeee.
annoyance: Idiots.
smell: Food

favorite artist: um...no idea.
desktop picture: TRIGUN
book your reading: "DEADLY VISION"
cd in player: a smurfy mix, burned, called, "ULTIMATE GROOVES VOLUME ONE"

dvd in player: harvey
color of toenails: ..um..normal.

l a s t | p e r s o n
you touched: um..wow...Brittany..or..alli I guess. Maybe..um..maybe not them.
hugged: Alli.
you imed: Brittany
you kissed: Someone at the harvey show I guess

a r e | y o u
understanding: Usually
open-minded: I like to think so.
arrogant: one of my biggest flaws.
insecure: about...mostly myself
interesting: ..No. I think I'm the most incredibly un-intresitng people to speak too, ever. I say alot, but dont talk much.

hungry: VEry.
smart: When I want to be, yes.

moody: ...Sometimes

hardworking: I love hard work. It makes me happy. By ahrd work, I mean, hey, look, lets move stuff. and build things.
organized: with some things
healthy: usually
shy: Not in the least.
attractive: See above.
bored easily: No

responsible: Mostly

obsessed: YES. with this stupid BLOG

angry: At some things.

sad: Ah, could be.
disapointed: I usually am about something
happy: Mmmmm A bit.
hyper: ~_^
trusting: Sometimes, too much. Naive.
talkative: Bah. I'm too ...a..Yeah.

legal: Not a bit.

w h o | d o | y o u | w a n n a
kill: hmm..No one. Maybe..MAYBE..Blaine Thompson.
slap: (Hahaha punch) Blaine.
get high with: Ah...hmm..if I DID get high..I think...um..ha, no one.

look like: I look like...um...some guy.

talk to offline: Everyone
talk to online: anyone except dorks who can't spell out the word "you" without abbreviating it.

r a n d o m
in the morning i am: A blind jerk

all i need is: sleep

love is: confusing as heck.
i dream about: people, situations, the past, the future, never the present.

w h i c h | i s | b e t t e r
coke or pepsi: PEPSI

flowers or candy: hm...Candy, because I love my arteries.
tall or short: Tallnesh

r a n d o m
what do you notice first: Eye-area.
last person you danced with: ...um...Chritine Dipietro
worst question to ask: Are you gay?

who makes you laugh the most: Jason and brittany and michelle cohen
who makes you smile: everyone

who gives you a funny feeling when you see them: Christina Carivou. Guah.
who do you have a crush on: Plenty of folks.
who has a crush on you: Ah, here and there, this one and that one.

d o | y o u | e v e r
sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone to IM you: at times, yeah.

save conversations: If they are full of revelations and stuff that I will certainyl like to remember for a good while, yesh.
wish you were a member of the opposite sex: ...O_o..not ONCE.
wish you were younger: ah..bittersweet, aging.
cry because someone said something to you: ..Not in awhile.

n u m b e r
of times i have had my heart broken: ah.. fractured a good ..lot..of times. But never really broken
of hearts i have broken: Hm..Not really sure on how many.
of guys i've kissed: To my knowledge, none.
of girls i've kissed: hmm...a few.

of continents i have lived in: this'n
of tight friends: I'm too blasted mysterious and I don't tell anyone anything really deep about me. But...tight..tight as you could say, like, 3 or 4.
of cds i own: ..alot of burned ones
of scars on body: alot. Few on my ankles from falling around my pond, three on my hand from weird cuts that got infected, 2 from fights on my hand, one big one on my left arm from a knife thing, a small one from getting slashed with a key by a guy who didnt like me, small ones from when I fell through a window, others from other things. one on my stomach from a cut from something, and another one from cutting myself with a pocketknife awhile back, whittling a stick. One on my forehead from chicken pox...umm..I think I have a few more running around somewhere.

That was the longest quiz..gah..my eyes..

GF&G#&TVN

Smurfy — 2004-11-26T01:11:24-05:00

Whoever decided that you had to put gas in the smurfmobile is an idiot.

Stupid gas tank.

How much pushwater do you WANT, you obese little car.

Just because it's Thanksgiving, you don't get to be FAT off your stupid

GASSY-PUSHWATER BEVERAGE.

NOW YOU'RE JUST DRUNK, ACCURSED SMURFMOBILE!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-26T07:11:15-05:00

I'd like to introduce you all to the best movie ever.

Ever.

http://img40.exs.cx/my.php?loc=img40&image=feuerfreimovie.swf

Courtesy of Lady Cajuno.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-26T07:11:07-05:00

teh drivin time.

IT SHALL ROXORZ

Stupid metro guy.

Smurfy — 2004-11-26T10:11:52-05:00

Hey, ho, let's go.

I enjoyed my evening, surely.

But you just wait, she'll forget yet!

And I LOVE looking through old yearbooks. BOY!

TOS

Smurfy — 2004-11-27T05:11:05-05:00

What will happen, will happen.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-27T06:11:48-05:00

HOLY CRAP.

MY WHOLE BLOG IS IN STRIKETHROUGH.

O_o

Smurfy — 2004-11-27T07:11:36-05:00

Hmm, if mindsay didn't suck at HTML, I could probably fix whatever it is went wrong with that last post.

My whole BLOG.

And you know, I heard this awesome joke earlier, somewhere.

"I have all these girls as 'friends', but you know, thats so lame. That's like having 19 dollars in your bank account and needing to use an ATM..."

haha. applicable.

PASTA REBIRTH

Smurfy — 2004-11-27T07:11:51-05:00

Check it out, I'm bringing back the always popular pasta series. for a return.

To your demise

AND BEYOND!

Where did the pasta go?

Search the DRESSER, shouted Zora. She was looking for the box of pasta.

Previously her Great grand cousin Ralphy Bill Jr. Had given it the blessing of being magical pasta.

Pasta with a passion FOR MURDER.

That's right.

Her great grand cousin RALPHY BILL JR. WAS A PSYCHOTIC TRANSDIMENSIONAL KILLER FROM MARS

Why weren't you WATCHING it! I TOLD YOU THAT BILL COSBY IS MY NEMESIS FROM NOW ON TO WATCH THAT BOX.

Zora was angry with her nephew, Tommy.

Tommy was a very very very very very stupid child.

I don't like tommy and I just made him up.

Tommy replied to Zora, who was his aunt:

BUT GRAMMA LINDSAY! I LOVE PASTA!
O.O!
WHAT?! Shouted zora,
DID YOU EAT THAT PASTA?!
To which Tommy replied
LOL YES.

Zora immedietlly ran from the boy, for she knew, there was no hope.

She closed her eyes as she began to hear the explosions!

THE PASTA HAD EXPLODED TOMMY!

The very very very very very stupid child.

NOOOOO! Cried Zora, NOO!...w..well...
Actually I didn't like Tommy very much.

He was very very very very stupid.

Zora casually walked back in the house with a song on her lips and a smile on her 68 year old sagging face.

But SUDDENLY

ZOMBIE TOMMY WAS RUNNING AMUCK IN HER CLOSET!

That son of an english SALAD MAKER! Cried Zora

Suddenly Tommy's dad, the great english salad maker Ralphy Bill Sr. Felt his ears catch on fire and he too became a zombie.

Meanwhile, in vermont, Bob Newhart cracked a stupid joke from his INN, in the show NEWHART, and everyone immedietlly cancelled him.

And so, after Zora was properly eaten, The evil pasta was proclaimed the new emperor of Rome, after which was massacred by the turkish invasion of 2018, to which someone replied:

What the HECK is smurfy talking about and why do I care.

Like I would know the answer to that. It's not like I Have any idea what I just wrote or WHY I'm superman.

BLOG TWOAGE

Smurfy — 2004-11-27T11:11:40-05:00

eh, I'm going back and forth with this.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/smurfy2

We all know I need another blog.

Hope and Ferrets

Smurfy — 2004-11-28T04:11:32-05:00

Un Estacionamiento

translation

Parking.

Haha. AND THEN LILLY TERRORIZED EVERYONES LAPTOPS.

So the funniest thing happened,

And then I forgot.

I need to start writing this stuff down...

Anyway, the musical fast approaches, and I am reminded of how much last years certainly...um..sucked.

Not exactly bad in a BAD way, but the egoooo's the drrraaama, and the sickening remembrence of my freshmen youth, it all adds up into this mad pot of terrible memories and a very faint smell of bad music. Here's to hoping this one goes better.

Today, however,

Today, I had to continue the war.

The war of will's, with Ferret.

As you may know, "THE CAT", who's name happens to be "FERRET", is one of my mortal enemies.

Regularly, and without fail, when I need to leave my room very fast, I will swing my thing wooden door open, and a brush of "DOOM CAT FUR" will hit my legs.

It is Ferret.

Now, we must begin the struggle.

Inevitably, she will run under my bed which has clearance for one cat named ferret, and a box for stratego. Once upon a time, many moons ago, I attempted to crawl under the bed and pull her out.

Small Space + My face + Ferret + Claws/Teeth= Ow.

So, I have developed a new strategy. Making weird noises and hitting my bed until she comes sneaking out the other side.

Here, at this intersection, one of two things will happen.

1) ferret will jump on my couch, and proceed to lay down pointy side up. Pointy side up. This is the side with teeth. And claws. Lots of claws. And also fur. or

2) Ferret will run behind my couch, and stay there for 3-6 hours.

2 is just annoying.

3 is just painful.

Now, if she goes behind the couch, it's over.

It's a staring contest. If I try to move the couch, 5 years worth of science magazines will hit the floor, resulting in my immediete demise, because, all..that..um..

Science.

It's painful.

But if she lays pointy side up, ah, yes

We can work with the pointy side.

The pointy side has a weakness.

The pointy side gets tired and falls asleep.

I, however, prefer the other one.

The can opener.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-11-29T04:11:01-05:00

I got hold of Jason's copy of "The Exorcist" and "Legion" today....

But I also go a new english book, what was it, something..umm..

Honey from the..

heck, I don't remember.

Something about India.

and maybe a gold necklace or atlantis or bill cosby, I cant follow.

No baord meetting, no one came,

So I just hung around the cafeteria with everyone, I felt good

No I don't felt good.

Need some pizza, maybe.

It all comes down to my Forsaken arteries int he end

Also,

FATE CONSPIRES AGAINST ME!

New Scene

Smurfy — 2004-11-29T09:11:28-05:00

I have a new scene written here for my theater class, if anyone wants to read this garbage.

Rumple-Still-Smurf

By Smurfy

Narrator-Smurfy

Father- Charles

Daughter- Kate

King Norbert- Brian

RSS- Smurfy

Son- Steven

Narrator- Good EVENING, ladies and.. Gentlemen, Our story begins early one morning in a small kingdom, ruled by the tyrant King NORBERT. A father and his daughter are in HEATED argument, it seems the Fair and Lovely girl wishes to escape from the kingdom, because Norbert is just so tyrannical. Let us look into their sad, pathetic, peasant lives, and possibly laugh at their very existence. Ha, peasants…

------------------------

Daughter- Oh, FATHER! I wish there was SOME way to escape the harsh realties of peasant life!

Father- Well, you know, you could always…say. Spin straw into gold!

(King runs in babbling about gold)

King- GOLD?! WHAT DID YOU SAY?

Father- Err…..You can spin straw into gold?

King- Oh HELLO!

Daughter- No! I’ll be thrown into slavery, killed, OR WORSE….MARRIED!

King- Sorry pops, I’m gonna have to take this little gold spinning lady on a ride. C’mon, we’re goin’ down to my dungeon of DOOM, you gonna spin me some GOLD!

Father- Um….. Yeah. Sure.

(King laughs and pulls daughter off stage, Father leaves. King then walks back onstage and throws daughter down)

King- Now YOU get down there, and spin ALL the straw you see into gold, or, you know. We’ll… um… have to kill you and all that.

Daughter- Well….. Why?

King- SPIN SOME GOLD, FOOL! (King runs out)

Daughter-(Cries) Oh this is TERRIBLE! I wish…I wish.. I wish that there was some way for me to LIVE!

(Smurfy jumps in)

RSS- Ah… THERE’S my WISHER… Yes, I heard you wishing, My hot little peasant woman.

Daughter- Well… uh.. Err.. Hot? I mean… um.. YES! Could you.. Say, Save my life! Annnnnnnnnnnnnnd spin this straw into gold?

RSS- But of COURSE, my honey, all’s I need is that necklace, some…. Money, say, and also, your soul. (Short silence)

RSS- Haha, just kidding. I only need your firstborn son.

Daughter- Well, um, sure, all’s he does is complain anyway.. I suppose you could find him down on 12th street, at that… distasteful bar.

RSS- Wait, you already have one?!

Daughter- Well… um.. Haha, yeah. You know how college is.

RSS- Um… well.. Alright, I’ll spin this straw into gold, and YOU give me your son. Deal?

Daughter- Well…

RSS- DEAL! You just fall asleep right…HERE, (Hits her in the back of the head, she falls down) And I’ll get to work on this.. straw.. (Waves his arms and says STRAW BE HERE, YET GOLD BE GONE, SWITCH IT HERE, AND WAKE THE…shoot.. rhymes.. with.. gone… ugh.. GIRL! (Girl wakes up, looks at RSS) RUMPLE-STILL-SMURF AWAAY!

(RSS runs off, Daughter wakes up)

Daughter- Well, look at that I think I will FINALLY be able to escape this terrible village. What…What’s THAT! (King comes in)

King- Well… You actually did it. Shoot. I haven’t seen a good hanging in weeks. I suppose I’ll just marry you then!

Daughter- NOOOO! I MUST FIND MY SON! HE WILL SAVE ME FROM THIS TERRIBLE FATE!

(Daughter runs, off, king chases her, saying “Come BACK my sweet gold peasant honey!)

(Steven is seen sitting at table, when RSS runs in)

Son- Well HELLO sugar!

RSS- Well.. Um.. Yes, hello!

Son- What is it you need!

RSS- Well, see, the thing is, your momma

Son- ARE YOU TALKING BAD ABOUT MY MAMMA BOY! I’LL GIVE YOU SUCH A PINCH!

RSS- No, no, son. You see, your mother just gave me your life, you know, because I saved hers. And all that.

Son- Well, How can I be SURE, you little STINKER.

RSS- Son, just ask her, she’s running in now

Daughter- NoNoNo!! Do not take my poor son! He’s just so confused! Don’t you TOUCH him!

RSS- But, yeah, um, you remember when I said, I need your firstborn son and all that? Yeahhh.. (King runs in, with father)

King- YOU MARRY ME NOW!

Father- Don’t marry him unless he PAYS for it.

King- Since.. When.. a.. what? Who the heck are you?

RSS- Alright, this is enough, I’m taking pretty-boy here, and we’re going on a trip to the magical pot that cooks people. If you want me to go, you have to guess my NAME. It’s a SECRET name, NO ONE BUT MYSELF KNOWS!

Daughter- Rumple-Still-Smurf.

RSS- WHAAAT?

Daughter- Well you were yelling and screaming it all over the place earlier, so, you know.

Son- Oh you best be steppin’!

King- HAHA! YOU’RE ALL MINE! (Daughter screams, runs out. King follows her laughing)

Father- I don’t think so fool. I WANT MONEY. (Runs out)

Son- Don’t leave me here with this strange MAN. He’s so scary!

RSS- And, so, the moral of this story is. Be careful what you wish for. Because you never know. III may show up! HAHAHAHAHA! (Runs out)

-Scene I-

So, the emissary of death now becomes the messenger of life and hope...

Smurfy — 2004-12-01T04:12:24-05:00

When in the world is this week going to end.

So, I performed the aforementioned scene, much to Kate's dismay, and it went well. I was very glad! Glad glad glad glad.

And of course, today the window wipers attacked.

Well, there is a strong lack of drama or anything of that nature in my good life now, so I don't have anything to whine about here on my blog. I could pull into my bag of classic rants, and whine about freshmen, ghetto kids, preppy kids, or, you know, some idiot who said something stupid.

But when it comes down to it, all that matters is that I eat this entire bag of popcorn right here, indulge in some tooth-decaying soda, and precede with the normal routine of life.

But nooooooo

Since when am I normal.

I'm just....TOO SMURFY

HAHAHA!

so, anyway. Continuing.

I finally beat Tales Of Symphonia yesterday, and you know, that game was just freakin' crazy awesome.

It has all this cool pseudo-philosophy stuff, that wasn't really, but nice anyway. Nice. Definetelly playing through it again.

Now I just need to find someone to go to that dance concert with, to escape the normality of nothing to do on a friday.

You bus kids quit stalking me.

"This window stays OPEN, FRESHMAN"

Smurfy — 2004-12-02T04:12:46-05:00

You know, this blog needs to get with the funny stuff. This "Actual Life" nonsense is just Eating me alive! Eating! With a capital E in the middle of the sentence!

Leaving that thought.

So today, during lunch, I saw a new mysterious worker, who resembles bigfoot, only if the foot was the stomach, and they ahd 190 chins, with no hair whatsoever, yet still was female.

At least...

That's what we THINK.

I managed to buy a friday dance concert ticket 5 or 6 minutes before they sold out, and was informed the first dance was "Dance Porn"

I'm not really sure what that is, "Dance Porn", but I suppose I'll be seeing it.

Et cetera.

During Civics, while Clyburn was talking about something that didnt correlate to anything but him flirting with 15 year old white girls, he began randomly moving the voerhead back and forth, while it was on and displaying images.

This produced and epileptic sort of view, to which I shouted out

WOAH MAN SEIZURE.

After some chuckling, someome said

"What did that smurfy kid say"

and someone said

"Hail ceaser"

And then, haha, they said

"What? Ceaser? Smurfy's GAY"

And so, after purchasing half of Christine DiPietro's available airheads, I came home, and had a wonderful time doing it.

I got to speak with so many good people, and most everybody was all....good!

Ish!

Besides the fact that I have no sense of acting whatsoever.

Which I disagree with, by the way, even if you didn't mean it.

...Bowling?

Smurfy — 2004-12-02T04:12:41-05:00


bowling is love
brought to you by the isLove Generator

Evolution of the minds.

Smurfy — 2004-12-02T10:12:57-05:00

I was thinking about something not too long ago(which in itself is quite the thing, you see) about how Incredibly much I, along with many others, have grown since we started this last run down this really high hillside. And for many of us, there's a bit of a bump left to go. I guess this was all brought on by that accursed "Dust in the wind" song. Eh.

It's really just amazing, from how I look at it. Go back and try and read through some of these blog entries from back in may, or just look at this, my May 12th entry, very first one ever...

__________

Ba-Da-Bing

The day started well, I got on the bus. Bus. The bus is a good place in the mornings. I am the offical GUY-WHO-YELLS-FUNNY-STORIES guy. I just make up alot of stuff and blurt it out in odd patterns. You have NO idea how much fun this is. Like my inviclbe FIEND rant, and the SWEDES rant, (that was a good one, I did it twice) and then today, Our JARROD-GOT-HIS-FACE-KICKED-AND-BECAME-A-SUPER-SAIYAN rant. It was a DARN good one too, I must say. Then I got to school, stared around at people for the first few minutes, actually caught a glimpse of the one they call... "Brittany", and proceeded to follow the magical bell of scheduling classes.

I ate 2 or 3 lemon drops and I don't remember much after that.

I told this stupid ghetto girl to stop talking because she was stupid. That was fun. She just yelled some stuff in Ghettoish and walked off. didn't sound like much, but I couldn't tell.

I then wrote a play about the making of The Remote Control massacre....

Then Brittany forgot the holy grail. Curse her kool-aid drinking self.

Then I made this stupid thing.

__________

I was reading through this old stuff, and I just thought how... how much DIFFERENT I see things now. Sure, it's still the basic outline of "I can't stand ghetto kids" and "I'm making everything seem way cooler then it really is" But I just don't FEEL that way anymore. It's just incredible to me, the difference that a few months makes. You always FEEL like the same person, because these changes take place over such odd periods of time... so gradual that things seem the same, when in fact there's hardly anything that is not changed. Everything around you changes so quickly, so much during these last few years of public schooling. The people you hang around, what you do around these people, how you speak, how you dress.

And it feels so clichê to be typing this up, but, really, why not. Why not. It feels right, right now, and now's the only time this form of me is ever going to be around.

I close my eyes, only for a moment, and the moment's gone
All my dreams, pass before my eyes, a curiosity
Dust in the wind, all they are is dust in the wind.
Same old song, just a drop of water in an endless sea
All we do, crumbles to the ground, though we refuse to see

Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind

Now Don't hang on, nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky
It slips away, and all your money won't another minute buy.

Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind
Dust in the wind, everything is dust in the wind.

Dance Concert: EPIC DOOM, FROM DANCE

Smurfy — 2004-12-03T11:12:28-05:00

Welllllllllllllll

Enter,enter,enter,enter,

Dance concert was quite the show! I enjoyed myself. Et cetera. But let's plunge into tonights DETAILS, shall we?

Upon my arrival around 6:30 or so, I made a call to Jason isntructiing him to meet me in the gym lobby, then began milling about to find who i could find. After a limited amount of searching, I came upon a lizzy cohee, and was asked once more if I could accompany her to "Hooters".

I somehow figured my parents would be less then thrilled at the thought of me going to Hooters with 19 or 20 people from the dance concert, so I declined, sadly.

Sadly.

SADLY.

But you know, after seeing Future Dark Jared, and Future Light Byron, things were settled into motion. We found two seats by my old arch-nemesis/arch-..sidekick fellow, Drew Yoder, (Which were the worst seats ever), along with Jason, and we began to watch.

To my utter dismay, the alledged "Dance Porn" didn't exist, or rather, After the first show the "Dance Porn" was removed.

Shame shame shame

However, more then once, I thought to myself boldy...

Thank GOD for modern dance.

For it is good.

So VERY good.

After many minutes of neck-crick-inducing search, we discovered the loaction of short and tall sara(h), and "Hooked up" with them, as it were. I sort of just stayed around Drew Yoder.

Because mostly, there's not much going on outside but short/tall sara(h) checking out the artwork.

So I left

Ish.

The comedy really began afterwards, you see. Jason would try to explain to me how people always seem to come up to me and are like

"Who the heck is that tall guy"

And as he was explaining it, on 3 different occasions, he was interupted by some girl running up and being all

"SMURFY" ish.

Also, there was more funny stuff, like, some random woman in the back of the auditorium yelling THATS ENOUGH when everyone was telling everyone to SHHHHH.

THATS ENOUGH!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-03T11:12:36-05:00

...

Why can't you just remove the underlinign, there blog, do you HAVE to suck, BY LAW?

I didn't write it.

Smurfy — 2004-12-04T12:12:50-05:00

A little bit of a book, and a little bit of some lives. Classy. Not mine, don't give me credit.

Wednesday, January 5th
Cloudy, 80% chance of rain

"Another hundred years and we'll be done, James."
"Huh?"
"Humanity isn't going to last another century," he said, lighting up a joint.
"We're gonna blow ourselves up, huh?"
Jimmy stared at his friend, in his dark jeans and his buttoned, brown coat. Saying this wasn't like him would be foolish, but these outbursts had becoming more frequent recently. There was a long pause as Scott inhaled deeply and seemed to brighten up a bit.
"I like movies where the earth is destroyed. That's a very happy ending."
"Like Deep Impact?"
"Ugh. Let me explain. The Matrix is a series of films about a society dominated by machines."
"And unnecessary special effects."
"Yeah, but that's a different conversation. Ignoring the philosophical implications of the ‘Matrix' itself being far more pleasant than ‘reality', listen to this. Imagine if the third movie, Revolutions, presented Neo with a choice: Destruction of the planet or continued rule by machines. Which would he have chosen?"
"Death."
"Good answer. Why do you think that is?"
"It's his only escape."
"From a pointless existence."
"No, from that shitty franchise."
He laughed.
Jimmy, meanwhile, looked at the school building, towering above them. "Do you really think you should be smoking that here?"
Scott looked at him, then threw the lit, rolled up piece of paper on the ground and stepped on it. "There's nothing in there," he said. "It's just a visual aid."
The bell for first period was ringing.

* * *

"You okay, man? You haven't said much."
"Yeah, I'm just feelin' a little nostalgic."
"Why?"
"Don't you remember what day it is?"
Jim squinted his eyes for a moment and stared off into the distance, the same direction as his companion. He saw the stairs, fifteen of them in all. The ones that led up from the lobby to the main hallway. And he remembered.
"Oh."
Scott nodded, and turned to walk away, leaving his friend standing there, talking to himself.

"I'd forgotten."

Lies!

Smurfy — 2004-12-04T05:12:28-05:00

Family reunions with the rednecks are fun.

"So, Denny, where all have you served?"

"Well, all seven continents."

"Well thats cool. Desert storm?"

"Yep"

"Russia?"

"Sure."

"Christmas shopping?"

"Won't touch the stuff"

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-04T10:12:42-05:00

And now the underlining has been fixed.

Hurray for screwing things up!

Screw YOU, waiting for godot.

Smurfy — 2004-12-05T02:12:49-05:00

Anyone here ever heard of the ten minute play by David Ives called Arabian Nights?

This thing is just awesome...

I have found something to beat Waiting For Godot, for SURE.

English.:: Mrs Fergusson: "Whats number 9, Jason? "Um.....

Smurfy — 2004-12-05T04:12:44-05:00

Mrs Fergusson: "Whats number 9, Jason?

"Um.....::mutters:: Foment..."

"Haha, did you say vomit jason.

::jason looks about and mutters something under his breath::

"Yes. Yes, I said VOMIT."

"Haha, I thought you said vomit"

Haha. A clip on BOWTIE?

Smurfy — 2004-12-05T04:12:22-05:00

I appologize for exposing you all to a new header.

It's what I do, people.

2 and a half!

Smurfy — 2004-12-06T10:12:26-05:00

Christmas/Non denominational party because Amy's there and she's Jewish:

Sweet. I walked the blake, imitated John Kerry and had a faux gun duel with blake, definetelly hit carlos in the face, carlos made his image look gayer, somehow, (He really DID that), and my positive thoughts were deftly increased!

The increade is indoubtusbabauybully linked to the raise in flirting percentages, as noted in the Smurfy Guidebook, 2nd quarter review, 2004.

Also, see, I destroyed the "Charlies angels" which consisted of Brittany brooke and stephy. I just sort of hit them, and they all yelled "SEX WITH DAVID" ans something about dr pepper.

Now let me tell you something about theater arts.

My play, Arabian nights,a t ten minutes, is "TOO SHORT TEH OMG"

I do THREE of them now

S-c-r-e-w that.

Screw, kate. I said Screw.

During improv

::girl stomps loudly in the car, godzilla like::

Blake: Must be hubbard.

Jason/Smurfy: haha.

Guy: Oh! You're fat bastard! From Austin powers!

Jason: Hey, look blake, you were right!

haha. Burn.

Also, that party was just ALRIGHT. I got to walk the blake anyway.

Afterwards, we shared stories of old, added chapters, and realized in our game of high school, we only have 2 and a half pages left to write on.

Part II of the story I didn't write.

Smurfy — 2004-12-06T10:12:05-05:00

It is ..Deliciously intriguing.

"I'd forgotten."

Jimmy quickly turned around and called out to his friend. "Hey!" He ran to catch up to him.
"Yeah, man?"
"You want to see a movie later today? I think you could use some cheering up."
Scott didn't turn around. "Don't you work today?"
"Didn't you hear?" Jimmy smirked a little bit. "The place burned down."
"You're kidding." Scott kept staring ahead. ‘The place' was a Taco Bell about five minutes away from school where Jimmy worked.
"No. Electrical problems, they say." Jimmy and Scott both stopped in front of the door that led outside, to the parking lot. "So, whaddya say? Five o' clock?"
"Yeah." Scott smiled. "That sounds good."
"Alright, then. First, I gotta drive Sharon to her job. The Wendy's DIDN'T burn down." Jimmy was laughing.
"Poor girl." Scott paused for a moment. "When are you just gonna ask her out?"
Jimmy slowly stopped laughing and stared outside. "She's already waiting for me." He started out the door, then snapped his fingers and turned around. "You sure you've got a ride?"

"You didn't answer my question."

Jimmy and Scott stared at each other for a few seconds, then laughed.
"See you later, man."
"Yeah, see you." As Scott watched Jimmy shrink into the distance, the smile disappeared from his face. He slumped against the wall and slid down until he was staring up at the ceiling. The cracks showed where the asbestos had been removed two years ago.
Anxiously, he began tapping his fingers against the floor in a familiar rhythm. One, two, one two-two, one, two, one two-two..

The sound droned on until he no longer realized that it was even there.

Where did the cranberries go!

Smurfy — 2004-12-07T04:12:18-05:00

"Yo brotha, let me use yo'r phone for a min."

"Um..hang..yeah. Yeah, there it is, sucka"

------------

Well good afternoon my fellow bloggers. Are we ready to put the media out of business yet? No? Fine, then we'll continue not making sense.

Until we make into forbes. THEN we take over.

Thats what we need right there, a "TOP 50 FRIGGIN AWESOMEST BLOGS EV$R" Article in Forbes.

With a money sign.

I hear Microsoft is coming out with a TV now, that for some reason uses a computer itnerface.

So, 20 years from now, when TV's are as complicated as computers and crash and suddenly cut off your subscriptions to "EXPLODE FOREST ANIMALS NETWORK" and "THE PLAYBOY CHANNEL", we can further blame Bill Gates for making it such a sucky place.

A sucky place without exploding forest animal glitches, and no playboy channel.

Bad microsoft. Bad.

Now I had tu turn down invitations to 3 parties...

I'm feeling so out of the social loop.

Good thing I was never ever ever in it.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-08T08:12:56-05:00

Online Casino Buys Ghost Cane for $65K

By CHARLES WILSON

INDIANAPOLIS (AP) - An online casino offered $65,000 Monday for a metal walking cane that an Indiana woman put up for sale in hopes her son would believe his grandfather's ghost would leave their house with it.

GoldenPalace.com will add the ``ghost cane'' to a collection that already includes a grilled cheese sandwich said to bear the image of the Virgin Mary. The Antigua-based casino paid $28,000 last month for the sandwich, which it bought - like the cane - on eBay.

``It's just the new Americana thing,'' said Monty Kerr, a spokesman for the online casino.

Kerr said the cane - which Mary Anderson auctioned to ease her 6-year-old son Collin's fears that his grandfather's ghost was haunting their home in Hobart - likely will go on tour like the famous sandwich.

The cane - and the story behind it - attracted 132 bids, dozens of imitators and landed the Andersons on NBC's ``Today'' show Monday.

``It becomes a pop culture phenomenon,'' said Hani Durzy, an eBay spokesman. ``It may be just a few days or whatever, but it's all everybody is talking about.''

San Jose, Calif.-based eBay Inc. does not allow sellers to offer intangible items such as spirits or souls where delivery cannot be confirmed, said Durzy. He said Anderson's auction made it clear that she was selling her late father's metal walking cane as a ploy to ease her son's fears.

Anderson made one request of the winning bidder: ``I would like to ask you to write a letter after you've received the cane (and the ghost) to my son letting him know that he's there with you and you're getting along great.''

Kerr said the company would do so. The Andersons did not immediately return a call Monday seeking comment.

"I hate my life."- Smurfy

Crazy Stuff.

Smurfy — 2004-12-08T10:12:17-05:00

Had no bus again today. Had no bus yesterday. had no bus monday.

Buses should not come by your house at 9.

With angry old women/men things.

No, they should not.

They should NOT.

u_u'...

Dream Sequence.

So I was walking down the road with people. Lots of people. We walked past my great great grandfather wiley's house, which sits at the bottom of a hill, by a pond. The water had risen a large amount and had claimed the house. I was shocked at this, so we all ran down to look at it.

A large sinkhole appeared, sucked in the house and a number of people, they didn't come back up. And the last words were "We, mostly I, You were used." It was a falling, fading chorus of people yelling "We, Mostly I, you were used" The people who were left didn't speak anymore, nor looked away from the spot of the sinkhole, which was now filled with water.

They stood, and I looked.

They were silent, as I asked what had happened.

"We, Mostly I, you were used"

Now, I'm not into symbolism, but, you know, I realized something today.

I have been used.

ENGLISH IZ PFUN

Smurfy — 2004-12-09T09:12:59-05:00

Well, so,

I'm here, that is to say,

English.

So, Aparently benevolence is the definition of BIG BROTHER. It's a sickness.

And also.

Jason says something, I can't really tell. SOmething about..something...

How many legs does a dog have if you say it's tail is a leg?

Thats right

Four.

Because four is the number of legs a dog has with a tail. Because a tail is not a leg.

Also our announcer is an idiot.

Idiot.

Lizzy: smurfy you FANCY TICKLER i luv u more than ne other smurf ever in the history of history!!

Fear my fancy tickling powers.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-09T05:12:02-05:00

Come on, honey! where's the LOVE!

War of The Worlds: 2005

Smurfy — 2004-12-10T07:12:20-05:00

So, Spielberg is making a new version of "War of the Worlds" due out in summer 2005.

Now this trailer just looks hott.

Next year's movie season is going to be hott, folks.

Sure, it's got Tom Cruise in it. But I can live with that.

http://www.waroftheworlds.com/

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-10T04:12:49-05:00

War of the Worlds

What happened? Japan Happened

Smurfy — 2004-12-10T10:12:36-05:00

I got a mysterious IM from someone today, and it turned out to be catherine cregger, whom I really haven't spoke too since 8th grade-ish.

I was just thinking about her the other day, so it's, it's kind of cool, you know?

___________

So, I went to a japanese steakhouse for the first time ever. That was kind of cool.

The guy fixing our food kept throwing poppy seeds at the other table because they were "not loud enough"

And he did this cool thing called an "Onion volcano" where sort of made a volcano out of onions and poured alot of stuff that made alot of fire in it, and lit that sucker up.

Now that was groovy eatin' there.

The captain of the restuarunt came out with the bill, and he said this

"Well, guys, who's the boss"

And I said

"Hahaha, Tony Danza!"

I swear, everyone around me for like, 3 tables sort of looked at me mouthed

"....Tony Danza...Gay little kid..."

You know, when you have about 20 people, including your own family, the waiters, and the cooks looking at you like your an idiot because you said HAHAHAH TONY DANZA,

You just..

Sort of smother yourself in the rice, and the oddly cooked banana's.

Life is an oddball.

Tony Danza is now bad for smurfy.

GAH!

Smurfy — 2004-12-11T08:12:24-05:00

I missed kate's surprise party, because I thought it was today.

But lo and behold, Blake revealed to me the secret of the elders.

It was friday, you idiot.

Michelle humor.

Smurfy — 2004-12-11T11:12:43-05:00

Happypup: i have!
Raining SkyFire: Apaprently so!
Raining SkyFire: for what class?
Happypup: english
Raining SkyFire: People who are smarter then college graduates honors english?
Raining SkyFire: THats the classes you usually take and all...pre-cal my foot..
Happypup: no
Happypup: im not in seminar or anything
Happypup: just honors
Happypup: im a slacker
Raining SkyFire: hahaha
Raining SkyFire: Slacker.
Raining SkyFire: right
Raining SkyFire: Procrastinator..sure
Raining SkyFire: but certainly no slacker!
Happypup: ok
Raining SkyFire: oh, sh
Raining SkyFire: there's a difference
Raining SkyFire: Even for people who grow sideways
Happypup: thats really hurtful, you kno?
Raining SkyFire: Hey, well
Raining SkyFire: I appologize!
Raining SkyFire: Sincerly!
Happypup: not really
Raining SkyFire: o_o
Raining SkyFire: Oh, really
Happypup: if i ever become anerexic, you'll feel really bad, now wont you?
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: *anorexic
Raining SkyFire: I will
Raining SkyFire: I'll try my best to make you be not anorexic
Raining SkyFire: if you do
Raining SkyFire: but growuing sideways
Raining SkyFire: I mean
Raining SkyFire: Your spine making a 90 degree angle
Raining SkyFire: and you just growing that way
Happypup: since when can you spell?
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha

Hey, why not, I've always wanted to be popular.

Smurfy — 2004-12-12T12:12:59-05:00

[ ]been drunk.
[ ]smoked pot
[x]kissed a member of the opposite sex.
[ ]rode in a taxi.
[ ]been dumped.
[x]shoplifted.
[ ]been fired.
[ ]had a job.
[x]been in a fist fight.
[x]snuck out
[ ]been arrested.
[ ]stole something from your job.
[ ]celebrated new years in times square.
[ ]went on a blind date.
[ ]smoked a cigarette.
[ ]gone on an airplane by yourself.
[ ]broken a bone.
[ ]had sex in a car.
[x]white lied to a friend.
[?]went swimming in your bathtub
[x]had a crush on a teacher.
[ ]celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans.
[ ]been to europe.
[ ]made out in a movie theater.
[ ]taken caffine pills.
[x] been to disney world.
[x] had a crush on someone you hardly knew.
[x] been to california.
[x]been skinny dipping.
[x]regretted something.
[x]peed on someones lawn.
[x]skipped school.
[ ]thrown up from drinking.
[ ]lost a parent
[ ]kissed a member of the same sex.
[ ]had sex with a boy.
[ ]had sex with a girl.
[x,x]been in a car accident.
[ ]partied for days and days straight.
[x]had a family member die.
[x]played 'clue'.
[x]had a sleepover party
[x]went ice skating.
[ ]dropped x.
[ ]been cheated on.
[ ]had a boyfriend/girlfriend.
[ ] had a 3some.
[/..one week..]had a sweet sixteen
[x]had/have a car.
[x]drove.
[ ]had sex on a roof, with your friends unknowingly watching? -
[X]but it sounds like fun

do you?
[ ]have a bf.
[ ]have a gf.
[ ]have a crush.
[x]have a dog
[x]have your own room.
[ ]listen to rap.
[ ]paint your nails.
[ ]play a sport.
[ ]play more than one sport.
[ ]watch sports on tv.
[x]have a fav. group/singer/artist.
[x]have more than 1 best friend.
[ ]get good grades. (somewhat)
[ ]play an instrument.
[x] have slippers.
[x]wear boxers.
[ ]wear black eyeliner.
[x haha]like the color blue.
[x]like the color yellow.
[x]like to read.
[x]like to write.
[ ]have long hair.
[x]have short hair.
[x]have a cell phone.
[ ]have a laptop.
[People still sue these? ]have a pager.

are you?
[ ]ugly.
[ ]pretty.
[x]ok.
[ ]bored.
[ ]happy.
[ ]bilingual.
[x]white.
[ ]Black
[ ]Mexican.
[ ]short.
[x]medium.
[ ]tall.
[ ]grounded.
[ ]sick.
[ ]lazy.
[x]talking to someone
[x]IMing someone.
[ ]scared to die.
[x]sleepy.
[x]annoyed.
[ ]on the phone.
[ ]in your room.
[x]drinking something.
[ ]eating something.
[ ]in your pjs.
[x]ticklish.
[x]listening to music.
[ ]homophobic.

Sweet summer's sweat.

Smurfy — 2004-12-12T01:12:01-05:00

They call it paradise, I don't know why.

Smurfy — 2004-12-12T10:12:49-05:00

The Grand Design

Susan Miller

"...You know, if you put a group of six-month old babies together in a room, and one starts crying, pretty soon they all cry. They can't differentiate.They are all one living, breathing, wailing, sobbing, suffering being.

The chemistry of the brain changes with certain events. Once you witness an atrocity-- or hear a cruel remark. When you cause dissapointment in someone's eyes. Or see an act of courage. There's a shift. Now, your brain's accommodating this new information. You're still pulled to earth by gravity. You're blood type is still O positive. But what happens to other poeple is placing itself in your cells. It resides in you now. And you're not the same. You're changed forever."

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-13T05:12:18-05:00

5 pages?

ha.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-13T09:12:22-05:00

Yeah, you think it's funny huh?

You think it's FUNNY.

You watch this, fool,

I'll prove you wrong YET!

(CANNONS READY SIR)

Yeah,

YOURE NOT THAT FUNNY! YOU'RE NOT THA-----

((EXPLOSION!))

The Ombaoojiebaseo, it is marching!

IT IS MARCHING TO YOUR DOOM!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-14T09:12:49-05:00

Man. English is roguh on the 'cells, sucka!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-14T10:12:07-05:00

Haha. A whhhhhhhole night FULL of smurfy faces. Sure was FUN, huh, kate?

We irritated the chorus jerks.

I had fun.

Singing, to upset the chorus jerks.

"Are you a..."

"I sure am!"

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-15T10:12:51-05:00

There won't be enough...

Horror.

In other news.

The talker, hosted by supermodel-actress Tyra Banks, has been cleared on NBC affiliate KGW-TV in Portland, Ore., which is the nation's 24th-largest market.

The show's syndicator, Warner Bros. Domestic Television Distribution, said "Tyra" will air at 10 a.m. on KGW's schedule, replacing "The Tony Danza Show."

SCREW YOU Tony DANZA.

Make me look like a fool in a japanese place huh..HA!

CANCELLED, SUCKA!

Thank GOD, you idiot, good job at holding off for a YEAR. Stupid smurfy.

Smurfy — 2004-12-15T10:12:22-05:00

So I IMed melanie.

The world is a better place.

I think I can finally close that stupid freshman year folder now.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-16T06:12:52-05:00

That building is the image of all that is.

CURSE THAT BILL COSBY!

Smurfy — 2004-12-16T09:12:22-05:00

Today reminds me of yesterday,

More then the day before.

I grow reminiscent here,

Standing alone, amongst this tree.

_____________

I passed out all the christmas presents today.

I had no idea Frogs had such appeal!

I thought it was just a bad horror movie.

But chocolate and Bill cosby and rabbits are a man's best friend.

Except bill cosby.

Stupid BIll Cosby.

Chapter next.

Smurfy — 2004-12-16T10:12:44-05:00

Hey, you know what.

I have more of that story that writes itself.

From annonymous writing thing.

Wednesday, January 5th
Cloudy, 80% chance of rain

"Another hundred years and we'll be done, James."
"Huh?"
"Humanity isn't going to last another century," he said, lighting up a joint.
"We're gonna blow ourselves up, huh?"
Jimmy stared at his friend, in his dark jeans and his buttoned, brown coat. Saying this wasn't like him would be foolish, but these outbursts had becoming more frequent recently. There was a long pause as Scott inhaled deeply and seemed to brighten up a bit.
"I like movies where the earth is destroyed. That's a very happy ending."
"Like Deep Impact?"
"Ugh. Let me explain. The Matrix is a series of films about a society dominated by machines."
"And unnecessary special effects."
"Yeah, but that's a different conversation. Ignoring the philosophical implications of the ‘Matrix' itself being far more pleasant than ‘reality', listen to this. Imagine if the third movie, Revolutions, presented Neo with a choice: Destruction of the planet or continued rule by machines. Which would he have chosen?"
"Death."
"Good answer. Why do you think that is?"
"It's his only escape."
"From a pointless existence."
"No, from that shitty franchise."
He laughed.
Jimmy, meanwhile, looked at the school building, towering above them. "Do you really think you should be smoking that here?"
Scott looked at him, then threw the lit, rolled up piece of paper on the ground and stepped on it. "There's nothing in there," he said. "It's just a visual aid."
The bell for first period was ringing.

* * *

"You okay, man? You haven't said much."
"Yeah, I'm just feelin' a little nostalgic."
"Why?"
"Don't you remember what day it is?"
Jim squinted his eyes for a moment and stared off into the distance, the same direction as his companion. He saw the stairs, fifteen of them in all. The ones that led up from the lobby to the main hallway. And he remembered.
"Oh."
Scott nodded, and turned to walk away, leaving his friend standing there, talking to himself.

"I'd forgotten."

Jimmy quickly turned around and called out to his friend.

"Hey!"

He ran to catch up to him.
"Yeah, man?"
"You want to see a movie later today? I think you could use some cheering up."
Scott didn't turn around. "Don't you work today?"
"Didn't you hear?" Jimmy smirked a little bit. "The place burned down."
"You're kidding." Scott kept staring ahead. ‘The place' was a Taco Bell about five minutes away from school where Jimmy worked.
"No. Electrical problems, they say." Jimmy and Scott both stopped in front of the door that led outside, to the parking lot. "So, whaddya say? Five o' clock?"
"Yeah." Scott smiled. "That sounds good."
"Alright, then. First, I gotta drive Sharon to her job. The Wendy's DIDN'T burn down." Jimmy was laughing.
"Poor girl." Scott paused for a moment. "When are you just gonna ask her out?"

Jimmy slowly stopped laughing and stared outside.

"She's already waiting for me." He started out the door, then snapped his fingers and turned around. "You sure you've got a ride?"
"You didn't answer my question."

Jimmy and Scott stared at each other for a few seconds, then laughed.
"See you later, man."
"Yeah, see you." As Scott watched Jimmy shrink into the distance, the smile disappeared from his face. He slumped against the wall and slid down until he was staring up at the ceiling. The cracks showed where the asbestos had been removed two years ago.
Anxiously, he began tapping his fingers against the floor in a familiar rhythm. One, two, one two-two, one, two, one two-two..

The sound droned on until he no longer realized that it was even there.

Scott felt a light vibration in his pocket. Then he heard the ring tone, a tidy little polyphonic rendition of ‘Tubular Bells'.

"Hello. Oh, hi, mom-wait, what?" He turned the cell phone around and looked at the clock. 4:25.

Shit.

"Jesus! I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was.. Sorry. Alright, thanks."

The woman on the other line started to say ‘good-bye', and Scott interrupted.

"Wait, I need you to drive me to the movies, I'm meeting Jimmy there."

A pause.

"Thanks."

Scott took a deep breath as he flipped the ear-piece back down to meet the keypad. For a moment, he was content, but still aware that something overlooked was bothering him. Though he knew it a bad idea, he clawed at his thoughts in masochistic pose, when the phone began shaking again and dropped out of his hand.

"Shit.."

He leaned over to pick it up and saw that the screen read ‘Restricted Number'. "Hello?" he answered, straightening himself back up.

Silence.

For a moment, he expected a click and pre-recorded message, but nothing came. He again pulled the phone away from his ear to look at the screen. They hadn't hung up.

"Hello?" he repeated.

He waited a long time. For a moment, he heard something, but then realized it was the sound of the janitor talking to himself as he wheeled the trash can past. When the two became aware of each other, they both tried to shake off a strange chill.

When at last the old black man continued on his way, Scott looked down at his cell phone. They still hadn't hung up. Finally, he gave up and ended the call.

He turned around to get another look at the old black man, and saw that he was staring back. The two nodded at each other.

Scott pushed open the door and walked around to the front of the school, where he sat down on the steps. After sitting alone for a few minutes, he heard someone sit down near him, on the same step. He started to look and see who it was, but the fear of being noticed caused him to snap back into place.

A gentle voice said "Hey". Slowly, Scott turned to face the girl sitting next to him. She had long, dark hair and a polite smile.

"Hi." He knew her.

"I think I'm in your English class, but I'm not sure if I know you from somewhere else.." She was looking around.

Oh, God. She thought I was someone else.

"Nope. I'm Scott Martell. Nice to meet you." Without thinking, he stuck his hand out to shake hers, but when he looked down he noticed both her hands were full. She was holding her binder, and a bottle of Dr. Pepper.

He quickly shoved his hand back into his pocket and looked away. He wasn't very relieved when she laughed. But it was a kind laugh, and it certainly didn't make him feel worse.

"It's nice to meet you, too, Scott Martell. That's a nice name."

Scott looked up at her face, and grinned as the surreality of the situation finally struck him.

She was still smiling. "I'm Annie."

* * *

Scott arrived at the theater at approximately 5:10, and was greeted next to the ticket booth by a short man with short, brown hair who was shaking his head.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Look, I'm sorry, alright?" Scott looked behind him, at the fifty cold, noisy people patiently waiting for their turn to give $7.50 to a sixteen-year-old blonde girl in exchange for a small slip of paper. "Should we, um, get in line?"

Jimmy smirked. "I already got our tickets." He opened the door. "Fifteen minutes ago."

Scott sighed and walked inside, straight over to the concession stand.

"What are you doing? We're already late." Jimmy leaned on the glass case and stared at his friend.

Scott asked for a medium Coke and turned around. "Jimmy.. We've know each other for how long?" He didn't wait for an answer. "Over two years. And every time we've ever seen a movie together at any venue, I'm sure you've noticed that I have something to drink. Do you know why that is?"

Jimmy shook his head.

"It's because I'm secretly a raging masochist, Jimmy. I chug soda and then sit down for two hours because I get off on it. It's the only thing that turns me on."

Jimmy laughed.

"Do you understand me?" Scott smiled. He got his drink. "Wait a minute, ticket. I need a ticket."

Jimmy, still laughing, reached into his pocket and handed Scott an orange piece of paper.

He read it, and in an instant remembered the commercials. "Since when are you a Nicolas Cage fan?"

"I'm not. You are."

Scott didn't say anything.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-17T06:12:52-05:00

Happy 16th birthday, smurfy.

Yes, thankyou.

I'll be too busy to remember how old I am.

Le sigh!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-17T11:12:10-05:00

I need a new hobby.

Like having a life!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-18T04:12:04-05:00

How to make a SMURFY

Ingredients:
3 parts friendliness
5 parts humour
3 parts leadership

Method:
Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Add lustfulness to taste! Do not overindulge!

Hurray for stuff!

FORGET ABOUT IT

Smurfy — 2004-12-19T09:12:54-05:00

I think I'm in a rut. I've come to the conclusion that I get stuck in my ways...ish. So, since the beggining of 9th grade, for about two years, I go through the same lunch line, and get the sum sub, every day. I drink the same chocolate milk, sit in the same spot, with the same people, every day. After I eat, I walk the same way, every day. Then I walk around and talk to the same people. Every day.

When I go to the movies, I sit in the same section, and the same side. When I go to ANY resturaunt, I get the same food. When I play games, I play them the same way. When I buy things, I buy the same brands, the same kind. I haven't had any soda other then mountain dew since the whole sundroop craze of early 2004. (may).

I lay down the same way, I watch the same TV channels, the same shows,

You know.

I need to change,

and I don't mean my pants.

Maybe the shirt

But not these pants.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-20T04:12:25-05:00

Let me telly uo a little bit about my civics exam.

Later.

After reading the cast list for anything goes, I know pretty soon, I'm screwed

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-20T09:12:16-05:00

So I get home and the water pipes have frozen from the wellhouse, so smurfy is summoned to go up the road and fill buckets of water up at grandma's well, you know, at 9:30 at night. It was cold.

Then we had to drive prepp-o sister back up the road so she could take her 5th shower of the week, et cetera.

But let me tell you something, it is one of the most astoundingly beautiful night skies I have ever seen that is out tonight. I mean GORGEOUS. It was worth standing outside for 10 minutes in the numbing wind just to lookat it.

so beautiful.

The year in Review.

Smurfy — 2004-12-20T10:12:13-05:00

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?

I said, hey, you know what? I'm going to date SOMEONE. Then I didn't.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
No. I broke them within, um, I'd say 12 hours. Yep. Always do.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
hmm... I'm thinking..um.. I think they did.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Yes. March 23rd.

5. What countries did you visit?
None.
6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
hahahahahahahaha. A relationship!? HAHA! Smurfy you crack you up.
7. What date(s) from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
March 23rd, um..The date for STRIKE, (that sunday), ground zero, for a variety of reasons, those of nostalgia, reminiscience, hope, silence, fear, and a whole lot of stuff.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
RocketMan.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Everything else. Also the remote control massacre.
10. Did you suffer any illness or injury?
Not this time.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Tales Of Symphonia.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Jeez, I dunno.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Mine.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Too crap like "SPYHUNTER"
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Kill Bill volume 2, parties, things that never materialized. (TWO SUNDAYS AGO)
16. What song/s will always remind you of 2004?
The Freshmen, Knockin on heaven's door, Bad Karma, Stand by me (oasis), Desperado
17. Compared to this time last year, you are:

Wiser, taller, fatter, alot better off.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Un-singleing.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
This.
20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Doing my usual round of self-induced saddness, playing Donkey Konga.
22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
I tried too. It never turns out to be mutual, you know.
23. How many one-night stands?
Nah.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Um,....No, probably not. Kind of. No.
26. What was the best book you read?
Thats a tough one. Legion right now is turning out alright. That or..um.. Dark Vision or whatever
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Warren Zevon, the eagles

28. What did you want and get?

I wanted a few good movies. I got..um..one.
29. What did you want and not get?

A relationship.
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Besides RocketMan: THE ULTIMATE HERO, um, Kill bill(s), all those friggin crazy awesome zombie movies, Exorcist 3

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I did nothing, I turned 16.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A lot of of...stuff.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
"Smurfy"
34. What kept you sane?
My observationalism, um...other people who were looking to ME for sanity...(which I kind of suck at)
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Romero (for some reason) Tarentino..
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
The election.
37. Who did you miss?
My grandpa, a few people no one knows.
38. Who was the best new person you met?

I met alot of new people this year. Alot. I guess...I re-met some people too. The best people I met this year are like...Brooke...Brittany..Michelle Cohen (I re-met her) other michelle, blake..um..jeez..some freshmen I can stand a little bit, Erin with the hair erin, short sara, katie, Lucy, lizzy, a few others I've forgotten, and will hate myself for forgetting in a few minutes.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
Just shut the heck up smurfy. That's an invaluable one right there.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"You gotta let somebody love you, before it's too late"

Trust me, I'm no walrus.

Smurfy — 2004-12-22T02:12:21-05:00

Exam's over, school out, All I have planned now is a huge 10 paragraph entry on how the year went, and all that reminiscient jazz.

Oh it's gonna be a good one.

"It's a wonderful life, isn't it Kinderman?"

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-22T02:12:45-05:00

Note to self: Aim VoiceChat sessions with northerners may/ will cause acute paranoia on both ends, due to extreme accents.

FEAR THE SODA.

(haha, melissa)

Check list.

Smurfy — 2004-12-22T09:12:19-05:00

Frogs? Yes. AWESOME movie.

Horror? No. TERRIBLE movie.

The Smurfy is a Psycho Super-Show: MEGA EDITION? Never seeing light of day again.

Tommorow: Make it, or BRAKE it smurfy.

Smurfy — 2004-12-22T10:12:38-05:00

Going for my license tommorow.

I can do everything except not speed.

Which I imagine is probably not going to make those drivers ed guys pretty happy.

Today

Smurfy — 2004-12-23T03:12:14-05:00

Boy was today something.

I was awkaened this morning at 10:20 by my sisters new Tamagotchi, which had taken a crap about 20 times and was screaming in pain. I quicly saved his life, and turned the sound off, then tried to go back to sleep. All I could do was think, so I decided to get up and go to work on my face. So, after spending an hour getting ready, I walked around,a te some pop-tarts, and it came time to depart for my license.

When I made it to the DMV, I found out you couldn't get a road test between 12 and 2, so there was a decision made to go to mcdonalds, and so I did. Cutting off two cars, turning into the wrong parking lot, and hitting 2 curbs later (it felt awkward), I managed to make it into mcdonalds. Then I noticed something wrong with my shirt. Then I recalled.

Earlier that morning, before I left, I realized my window had been down.

For 2 days.

So, I had a good deal fo water there, in my car. I had to dry off the inside, and I had brushed against the ...rusty..seatbelt part. And it rusted. On my shirt.

Which explained the large marks all over it. So I just decided to wear it backwards(sdrawkcab) the rest of the day!

And I did!

So, after waiting in McDonalds and watching the police woman in the table across from me play with her happy meal toy for awhile, we drove back.

This time, without almost causing 7 individual wrecks.

"Any moving violations in the last 6 months?"

"Nope...none"

"Any citations at all?"

"Not one"

"Good..good...::continues typing::"

As I sat idly, while S. U. WOOTEN continued to tpye away, she then said..

"Alright, go on over to your car and we'll get started. I'll be out shortly."

So, I went out, climbed in, and turned it on, listening to "Hot for Teacher" by Van Halen, I decided, was not a good thing. So I cut off the radio. That was fate there, it tried to screw me over once again, but I caught it that time. I caught it.

S. U. WOOTEN requested that I turn on my signals, break lights, and horn while she stood outside. You know how that is.

So, after a short road test, we went back in, signed the signature card, got the worst drivers license picture ever, and rode back home.

Where I started doing this.

Hot for teacher my foot.

So, in other words, yeah, I got my license.

Thanks for what you taught me, Mr Elliott.

Festivus Explained

Smurfy — 2004-12-23T04:12:13-05:00

BonziBuddyX: Happy Festivus, Smurfy!
Raining SkyFire: Woah! Festivus!
Raining SkyFire: never heard that one
BonziBuddyX: You've.. never heard.. of Festivus?
BonziBuddyX: Alright, here's the story.
Raining SkyFire: Let's have it
BonziBuddyX: Many Christmases ago, our founder, Frank Costanza, went to buy a doll for his son.
BonziBuddyX: He reached for the last one they had, but so did another man.
Raining SkyFire: ...
Raining SkyFire: Oh my
BonziBuddyX: As he RAINED BLOWS upon him, he realized..
BonziBuddyX: There had to be another way.
Raining SkyFire: Did this involve
Raining SkyFire: Arnold.
BonziBuddyX: Who the hell is Arnold?
Raining SkyFire: Thsi sounds strangley like Jingle All The Way
BonziBuddyX: No. You're an idiot.
BonziBuddyX: Anyway, the doll, obviously, was destroyed.
BonziBuddyX: But, out of it, a new holiday was born..
BonziBuddyX: A FESTIVUS.. for the rest of us!

BonziBuddyX: To celebrate Festivus, you need to set up an aluminum pole. No trees. Tinsel is too distracting.
BonziBuddyX: Then, at the Festivus dinner, you have the Airing of the Grievances. Where you tell all your friends and family how they have DISSAPOINTED YOU in the past year.
BonziBuddyX: And after that, comes..
BonziBuddyX: The feats of strength.
Raining SkyFire: No way

Raining SkyFire: You need to have the tiberian orchestra playing sduring this
BonziBuddyX: During what?
Raining SkyFire: this whole THING
BonziBuddyX: You mean, Festivus?
Raining SkyFire: Yes.
BonziBuddyX: Oh, no.
Raining SkyFire: Fesitivus.
BonziBuddyX: That would just distract from the true meaning of Festivus.

Raining SkyFire: What is the true meaning of festivus?

BonziBuddyX: ...
BonziBuddyX: :: slap ::
BonziBuddyX: Don't ever ask such a stupid question.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-23T07:12:05-05:00

I need another update for today. Deal with it.

[01.] Who are you?
[02.] Are we friends?
[03.] When and how did we meet?
[04.] How have I affected you?
[05.] What do you think of me?
[06.] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[07.] How long do you think we will be friends?
[08.] Do you like me?
[09.] Would you date me?
[10.] Would you kiss me?
[11.] Would you hug me?
[12.] Physically, what stands out?
[13.] Emotionally, what stands out?
[14.] Do you wish I was cooler?
[15.] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[16.] Am I lovable?
[17.] How long have you known me?
[18.] Describe me in one word.
[19.] What was your first impression?
[20.] Do you still think that way about me now?
[21.] What do you think my weakness is?
[22.] Do you think I'll get married?
[23.] What makes me happy?
[24.] What makes me sad?
[25.] What reminds you of me?
[26.] If you could give me anything what would it be?
[27.] How well do you know me?
[28.] When's the last time you saw me?
[29.] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[30.] Are you going to put this on your LJ and see what I say about you?

Thats right. I'm doing THIS post.

First of it's kind on my blog!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-24T05:12:08-05:00

WHERE'S THE LLAMA, NED?!*

*Obscure reference.

Legion, festivus, and the unexplained holiday.

Smurfy — 2004-12-24T10:12:10-05:00

Yeah, that's right. I made up the obscure reference.

And also, I discovered this.

TV NEWS

'Festivus' Shares Space With Fla. Nativity

By SARA KENNEDY

BARTOW, Fla. (AP) - When a church group put a nativity scene on public property, officials warned it might open the door to other religious - and not-so-religious - displays. They were right.

Since the nativity was erected in Polk County, displays have gone up honoring Zoroastrianism and the fake holiday Festivus, featured on the TV show ``Seinfeld.''

The Polk County Commission voted 4-1 Wednesday to permit the nativity scene to remain across the street from the courthouse, as well as to make that area a ``public forum'' open to any type of display.

But the commission insisted that unless someone claims a particular display and submits a written request asking it remain, it would be removed. By Wednesday evening, no one had claimed the Festivus display, and the commission said it would come down; a woman claimed the Zoroastrianism display, which was to stay.

The debate began Dec. 15 when a handmade creche with the figures of Joseph, Mary and baby Jesus was erected by a Bible study group from the First Baptist Church of Bartow.

``The real spirit of Christmas is the birth of Christ,'' said Marvin Pittman, a retired law enforcement officer and parishioner. ``We felt it needs to be in the public eye, so we did it.''

Other displays are fine, too, he said, adding, ``If somebody wants to do that, it's their right.''

And true to form, the site almost immediately sprouted alternative displays, including a simple sign that reads: ``Festivus for the Rest of Us - Donated to Polk County by the Seinfeld Fan Club.''

The display, a reference to the fake holiday featured on an episode of the television sitcom, did not include the totem of Festivus - a bare aluminum pole instead of a tree. Key rituals of Festivus include accusing others of being a disappointment and wrestling.

Another display celebrating Zoroastrianism was erected by Stella Darby, who wanted to encourage people to research the ancient Persian religion.

Richard Blank, a member of the American Civil Liberties Union, objected to the nativity scene's presence on public property, arguing it violates the constitutional separation of church and state.

``The nativity scene is totally celebratory of the birth of Christ,'' he said. ``Not everyone subscribes to that, and those who do should put it on their own property.''

But a board member who voted to allow the creche as part of the ``public forum'' disagreed with Blank. ``A group had asked to display a scene important to their beliefs; I felt we shouldn't suppress their right to do so,'' said Commissioner Samuel K. Johnson.

Now,

I still have no idea on the whole fesitvus thing, but I tell you.

It's makin' some crazy stuff happen.

"That's right," said Kindermanm

"We are The Angel. We are the bearer of light"

Now, let me tell you.

Legion, is probably one of the best books I've ever read.

OMG SPOILER ALERT ***************...

Smurfy — 2004-12-24T10:12:01-05:00

Merry Chris'maz, ladeh's and gentlemen.

To celebrate, we have a seasonal smurfy header.

FOILST I SAY!

Smurfy — 2004-12-25T06:12:34-05:00

Ladies and gentlemen, I now possess

THE MEMORIZZLE

KATE! Thou hast been FOILST!

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-25T09:12:58-05:00

Sara and Katie made a postcard of smurfy.

This is peculiar, ladies and gentlemen.

Why IS America falling in love with lindsay lohan, smurfy?

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-27T03:12:05-05:00

Now, picture this.

A Charlie Chaplin...ZOMBIE movie.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-27T10:12:27-05:00

Life according to dawn of the dead (2004)

Dead mother= Zombie babies.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-27T11:12:05-05:00

And that header is going to stay there for weeks, get over it megan.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-30T05:12:03-05:00

All's I have to say, you know, is that I'm back. My body at least. My mind, you see, was lost along the way. A few years ago.

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-30T08:12:48-05:00

Boy do I have some stories to tell!

I'll get to them as soon as I get over this lazy streak I seem to have falle---

::leaves::

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-30T08:12:06-05:00

And I FIXED the header. GOOD HEAVENS.

Michelle: Why I hate acrobatics.

Smurfy — 2004-12-30T10:12:48-05:00

Raining SkyFire: Why don't you see if you
Raining SkyFire: can walk on your hands
minkie schminkie: b/c i already know i cant
minkie schminkie: and i like my body in one piece
Raining SkyFire: Michelle
Raining SkyFire: you're never going anywhere if you have a bad attitude about things like acrobatics
minkie schminkie: yes i am
minkie schminkie: i was scarred for life as a child
Raining SkyFire: Please
Raining SkyFire: let me indulge myself by asking how you were scarred
minkie schminkie: SCARRED FOR LIFE
Raining SkyFire: O_O
Raining SkyFire: MY!
Raining SkyFire: Yes
minkie schminkie: jordan was too
Raining SkyFire: add that
Raining SkyFire: really?
minkie schminkie: indeed
Raining SkyFire: Please, let me hear of this scarring
minkie schminkie: when i was merely a child
Raining SkyFire: Yes, yes
minkie schminkie: at that impressionable age of... idk, like youngish
minkie schminkie: my eldist sister
minkie schminkie: became a gymnast
minkie schminkie: jordan and i
minkie schminkie: have little or no physical skill at the time
minkie schminkie: and certainly not enough to do stupid flips
minkie schminkie: were plagued
minkie schminkie: seeing as
Raining SkyFire: XD
minkie schminkie: anytime our friends came over, they were forced into the backyard to watch leigh's newest routine, and they for some reason liked it and leigh liked it b/c she got attention as was a huge showoff
minkie schminkie: and not only this
minkie schminkie: but once she made the team
minkie schminkie: we were dragged across the state of wisconsin
minkie schminkie: forced to listen to that stupid music for the floor routine over and over
Raining SkyFire: XD
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha
minkie schminkie: and then we'd have to switch rooms for different events
minkie schminkie: and the stupid competitions
minkie schminkie: would last all freaking day!!
Raining SkyFire: You're KIDDING me
minkie schminkie: and we'd have to pack up some toys and cling to our meager chances at entertainment to narrowly escape death\
minkie schminkie: and they were ALL the time
minkie schminkie: and we'd leave early in the morning
Raining SkyFire: ew
minkie schminkie: and get back late at night
Raining SkyFire: early is TERRIBLE
minkie schminkie: and once when we got back late
minkie schminkie: we had parked in a parking garage and forgot where the car was
minkie schminkie: and it was really creepy
minkie schminkie: and so jordan and i
minkie schminkie: would watch as leigh accepted zillions of metals
minkie schminkie: and put them on that ugly panda bear
minkie schminkie: and flaunt them
minkie schminkie: and those less fortunate and less talented
Raining SkyFire: Oh boy, Leigh is reading all of this isn't she?
minkie schminkie: namely myself
minkie schminkie: would sit back and cry internally
minkie schminkie: for their ruined childhood years
minkie schminkie: the end

no subject

Smurfy — 2004-12-31T07:12:56-05:00

....NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

American Smurfy Odyessy: 2004

Smurfy — 2004-12-31T10:12:16-05:00

The Year of The Blog

And I italicized it, deal with it, sucka.

A year, a year, a year. In this short span of 366 days ( It was definetelly a leap year), I've watched friendships dissapear, new bridges formed, pacts created, lies attempted, pain fulfilled, and much more. I've learned the true value of freindship, and the true pain of losing them. I've learned that people are all too fragile, and life is much too short.

In a manner of months, I feel that I, myself, have grown more, in this short span of 366 days, then any other time in my life. Not that I don't have more to achieve. And yet, in a way, I really haven't changed at all. I'm still the same guy, the same old nickname, the same pointless circular thoughts, full of the same circular conversation. But, what defines your growth is how you percieve your past. If you can look back on the year and say, "I wouldn't have done that any differently", then what you have is lack of understanding. If you've grown any, there's always something you would do different, something you would look back on with wondering eyes, trying to think of way things could have been different. I made my share of mistakes. I'm the first to admit that. Harming people, seeing people harmed, the year was full of this. I watched close friends break apart, learn to be around new people, learn to adapt.

And surely, I did the same. I, again, made my mistakes. But what is important, is that I would change them. And I have. It took a long time for me to see what I did to so many people, and I tried, I suppose in some cases with great delay, to rectify what I had done. But this is important. Maturity comes with experience, as does wisdom. Growing wise is a side effect of a combination of learning, growing, and experiencing. Point being, I'm alot "Wiser" now then I was a year ago. But I am by no means as wise as I will become. We're arriving into 2005. A whole other group of 365 days, over 8000 hours. Thats a whole lot of time to spend, and I'm bound to make mistakes. other people are bound to hurt others, we're not even guranteed we'll live to see the next year end.

But, you know, the point is, that I can look back into THIS year, back into the things I HAVE been through, and realize how much things change, and how little you can do to stop it. I'm glad things happened the way they did. But, without a second thought, if I could, I would change them. To all my friends, my old comrades, my despised and respected enemies,

Happy New Year.

-Smurfy.

Stuff.

Smurfy — 2005-01-01T03:01:55-05:00

Katie: Smurfy, I'm going to SHOOT you. REALLY REALLY HARD.

OmGlTzJaNe: Yeh i hear u
Raining SkyFire: So, today, I just drove around in the smurfmobile for awhile, bought soem sundrop, and drove to some old big field and slept in the shade for about an hour.
OmGlTzJaNe: lol ur sooo strange... why didnt ya hit up a party or somthin
Raining SkyFire: Pshhh
Raining SkyFire: Smurfy?
OmGlTzJaNe: Yeh... i c ur point
OmGlTzJaNe: ok... lemme re phrase
OmGlTzJaNe: why didnt ya hit up a study group or somethin

Day meets Year

Smurfy — 2005-01-01T07:01:22-05:00

Well. Today started out innocent enough. ..Then..it..sort of stayed that way. Ish.

Ish.

So, we arrive at "CRACKER BARREL", and I decide to get the same thing I always get every tiem we go there, which is the maple pancakes. Three. So good. So very very good. While I was cutting my pancakes, drinking Mr. Pibb, I recieved a frightning hug and a SMURFYYYYYYY! Now, this kind of happens often so I wasn't to surprised, but then i turned around,a nd behold, it was tiffany brock! Hadn't seen her since the day after graduation last year. So, after a breif conversation and several more hugs, she left, and I felt happy, because it had been so long. She's still tiffany. She's..just..um...taller maybe?

Nah. She wasn't.

Anyway, I continued with my pancakes.

(Also, during this time, I ran into Shepherd)

I left, and, still, tiffany was on the porch, on the rocking chairs, with..I guess he was her grandfather, i saw him before. I said, as I walked by, it was good to see her, and that I hope it would be soon when i spoke to her again..then I walked more and turned back,

before another year passes. I thought it was kind of dramatic, and cool, then I fell. Hit the van.

Poor thing.

It's a smurfy thing, you know.

So then we left. And came home. And then I left, you know, in the smurfmobile. it was so HUNGRY. the poor fellow needed gas. So I drove to the Exxon. And there, I discoevered to my dismay, that the gas tank I was uing would not work. I started kicking it, and people were making weird faces, so I just reversed backwards into another tankish section. That one worked....it was just very slow. Maybe it was tricking me. Anyway, after paying $16.00 of my not-that-hard earned money, I left for food lion. For absolutely no reason whatsoever. Just wanted to drive.

And I did!

And I bought some mighty fine sundrop soda, mighty fine.

I then drove back to my house, I had nowhere else to dawdle at. But instead, I decided to drive into the old field on my road, and parked in it. I broke out a sundrop, and walked past the hill, to the backside, where it was shady. I then took a good hour long nap, and drove back home. Where I was forced into labor, a man-slave, raking leaves and burning them for, oh man, an hour maybe. I like raking leaves. It's....rewarding. Because after you work, you get to burn the little devils.

Then, you know. Stuff happened, walked the dachsund, solved a mystery involving a mailbox letter and a strange IM, I quote Legion 600 times, Found some wiggy songs, and ended up here. Typing in this forsaken blog.

Let this be a lesson, to all next-door neighbors, to never, ever, care, about the children.

(Is that the end?)

Been a fool, been a clown
Lost my way from up and down
And I know, yes I know
And I see it in your eyes
That you really weren't suprised at me at all
Not at all
And I know by your smile it's you.

Don't care for me, don't cry
Let's say goodbye, Adieu.
It's time to say goodbye, I know that in time
It will just fade away, it's time to say goodbye.

I stand alone, and watch you fade away like clouds
High up and in the sky
I'm strong and so cold
As I stand alone
Goodbye, So long, Adieu.

Oh how I love you so, lost in those memories
And now you've gone
I feel the pain, feeling like a fool, Adieu

My love for you burns deep
Inside me, so strong
Embers of times we had
And now here I stand lost in a memory
I see your face and smile.

Oh how I love you so, lost in those memories
And now you've gone
I feel the pain, feeling like a fool, Adieu

My love for you burns deep
Inside me, so strong
Embers of times we had
And now here I stand lost in a memory
I see your face and smile.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-02T01:01:33-05:00

Man, is this some good weather we're having lately or WHAT!

I want to go drive with the wndows rolled down.

NEW! FROM THE GUY WHO MAKES THE WORST MS PAINT HEADERS EVER!

Smurfy — 2005-01-02T02:01:57-05:00

Behold, The space-time-continuum has taken over the header.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-02T08:01:52-05:00

There. I fixed the header.

You crazy children.

Mink Vs. The Ploo: EPIC DUEL OF THE HAIR

Smurfy — 2005-01-03T12:01:01-05:00

Be forewarned. The follow chat log makes no sense. To anyone. Not even us.

NOT EVEN US.

Raining SkyFire: minkie schminkie: and thats the end of my story
minkie schminkie: i told you it was long
Raining SkyFire: hahaha
minkie schminkie: Raining SkyFire [12:31 AM]: It seems michelle has a bigger mouth then usual
Raining SkyFire: That was the best story ever.
Raining SkyFire: Wooooooops
Raining SkyFire: Did I reeeeally say that?
Raining SkyFire: BAD JORDAN
Raining SkyFire: BAD BAD BAD
Jordypup:
Raining SkyFire: Yeah, pink frown face
Jordypup: im sorry
Jordypup: she begged me
Raining SkyFire: Badddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
Raining SkyFire: Bad bad bad
Raining SkyFire: She's a sly little mink
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha
Raining SkyFire: minkie schminkie: now she's mad at me!
minkie schminkie: because your mad at her!
minkie schminkie: because im mad at you!
Jordypup: hahaha
Jordypup: AH! the CIRCLE!
Raining SkyFire: hahahahaha
Raining SkyFire: minkie schminkie: morgan did you send jordan what i sent you what she sent me what you sent her?
Raining SkyFire: Well
Raining SkyFire: this is rather intresting
Jordypup: hahha
Jordypup: im so confused!!
Raining SkyFire: we are making a chat room! it will solve everything

Five minutes later

Raining SkyFire: oh, that didnt solve ANYTHING
Jordypup: im sorry
Raining SkyFire: Now we're just confused and QUIET
Raining SkyFire: and you're BLEEDING
Jordypup: i know
Jordypup: because michelle's violent and malicious
Raining SkyFire: Oh, I know, I've been beaten before.
Raining SkyFire: ..by the mink

_______

You have just entered room "Chat 18287774783286825670."
Jordypup has entered the room.
Raining SkyFire: Ha!
Raining SkyFire: The confusion shall END!
Raining SkyFire: where that mink
Jordypup: i think she declined your invitation
Raining SkyFire: I asked her 4 more times
Raining SkyFire: Oh, and I'll keep asking
Raining SkyFire: shell give in
Raining SkyFire: ...
Raining SkyFire: U_U
Jordypup: hmm i dont think she will
Raining SkyFire: I'm going to kill her dumb buddy icon,
Raining SkyFire: then she's coming in here
Jordypup: HHAHA
minkie schminkie has entered the room.
Raining SkyFire: THERE
Raining SkyFire: hahaha!
Raining SkyFire: Ch-ch-ch-check it out.
Jordypup: She's here
Raining SkyFire: No more confusion
Raining SkyFire: ever
Raining SkyFire: I noticed
Raining SkyFire: I smelled the minky smell
Raining SkyFire: Oh, she told me shes not talking
Raining SkyFire: Jordan,
Raining SkyFire: TICKLE her.
Raining SkyFire: Quickly.
Raining SkyFire: It's needed
Raining SkyFire: Shoot
Raining SkyFire: it's not working
minkie schminkie: puh
minkie schminkie: no touchy
Jordypup: she hit me!
Raining SkyFire: There
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha
Jordypup: abuse!!
Raining SkyFire: Michelle has so much PROWESS
Raining SkyFire: Are you BLEEDING jordan?
Jordypup: yes
minkie schminkie: CHYEAH
Raining SkyFire: SNAP!
minkie schminkie: how could she not be
Raining SkyFire: Michelle, stop biting.\
minkie schminkie: stop the faiting! i can't take the faiting!
Raining SkyFire: ....O_o
Raining SkyFire: Faw...W..Wha!?
Raining SkyFire: GAH!
Raining SkyFire: JORDANS DEAD
Raining SkyFire: Michelle, you..
Raining SkyFire: Sick..
Raining SkyFire: You ate her, didn't you.
Raining SkyFire: Gah
Raining SkyFire: you both self-destructed, I dunno.
Raining SkyFire: Anyway
Raining SkyFire: this didn't solve any confusion
Raining SkyFire: minkie schminkie: morgan did you send jordan what i sent you what she sent me what you sent her?
Raining SkyFire: like that
Raining SkyFire: ...
Raining SkyFire: terrible.
Jordypup: hahaha
minkie schminkie: hullo
Jordypup: HI!
Raining SkyFire: Well, that was fun
Raining SkyFire: Hello to YOU
Jordypup: welcome to chat 18287774783286825670
OnlineHost: Raining SkyFire rolled 2 6-sided dice: 2 3
Raining SkyFire: Can jordan do THAT
OnlineHost: Raining SkyFire rolled 15 999-sided dice: 513 67 502 19 941 113 983 580 225 795 356 494 949 813 361
Raining SkyFire: I think NOT
Jordypup: huuuuh?
Raining SkyFire: Michelle, you first.
minkie schminkie: jordan, what have you done?
minkie schminkie: im so confused
Raining SkyFire: wait
minkie schminkie: its all your fault
Raining SkyFire: CRAP
Raining SkyFire: YEAH
Raining SkyFire: JORDANS FAULT
minkie schminkie: you and your big hair
Raining SkyFire: O_O
Raining SkyFire: she has big hair?
Raining SkyFire: Awwwwwwwwwwwww
Raining SkyFire: ^_^_^_^_^_^
Raining SkyFire: <3
Jordypup: owwie
Jordypup: i cant help it that i have big hair
Raining SkyFire: Maybe michelles jealous?
Jordypup: JEALOUS
Raining SkyFire: Oh, SNAp
Raining SkyFire: Michelle got owned
minkie schminkie: i like having smaller hair
Raining SkyFire: Oh, well
Raining SkyFire: Nice comeback
minkie schminkie: because my ears hurt les
Jordypup: hehe O:-)
minkie schminkie: s
Raining SkyFire: Wait
Raining SkyFire: how does hair..
Raining SkyFire: Huirt ears?
Jordypup: when you tuck it behind your ears
Jordypup: or when i do
Jordypup: it stretches them all out of shape
Raining SkyFire: Oh, it sounds terrible
Raining SkyFire: Good heavens, your poor ears
Raining SkyFire: Michelle must be right
Jordypup: because my hair is too big and my ears are too close to my head
Raining SkyFire: The ploo, the ploo. Her ears!
minkie schminkie: hahaha
Raining SkyFire: hahahaha
Raining SkyFire: Boy, that was classy.
Raining SkyFire: Michelles going to make fun of you now
Raining SkyFire: ....Ish
minkie schminkie: not really
Raining SkyFire: by the way
Raining SkyFire: this whole THING
Raining SkyFire: is going on the blog
minkie schminkie: ive heard it allll before
Jordypup: the whole thing?
Jordypup: how are you going to do that?
Raining SkyFire: Jordan
Raining SkyFire: Have you ever been to my blog?
Raining SkyFire: It's like, magic.
Raining SkyFire: http://smurfy.mindsay.com
Raining SkyFire: plus it has a cool header pic.
Jordypup: hah yes ive seen it
Raining SkyFire: Oh, well
Raining SkyFire: You watch
Raining SkyFire: I'm posting this bunch of crazed maniacal nonsense on there now

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-03T03:01:05-05:00

What the heck am I doing online at 3?

..Can YOU sleep through all those flies in the window?

My resolution, according to geek-foo

Smurfy — 2005-01-03T12:01:43-05:00

And you watch, I will too.

In the year 2005 I resolve to:
Generate more bad karma.

Get your resolution here

SHE IS THE WHORE!

Smurfy — 2005-01-03T02:01:29-05:00

sUpEr FuNk oOx: its a musical! crap i cant sing
Raining SkyFire: HAAAA
Raining SkyFire: You can sign 8272782942 times better then I can
sUpEr FuNk oOx: From the creator of Chicago comes this poignant and funny look at the misadventures of an optimistic dance hostess who gives her love to one undeserving man after another. Down but never out, Charity goes through life with wide eyes and big dreams. Includes the hits, “Big Spender”, “If My Friends Could See Me Now”, “Where Am I Going” and more.
sUpEr FuNk oOx: YES! I AM THE WHORE

sUpEr FuNk oOx: do you not understand the amazing concept of my lazinesS? DIDNT THINK YOU SO YOU INTOXICATED SQUEEN!

You're KIDDING me.

Smurfy — 2005-01-03T10:01:40-05:00

I just learned that an hour and a half of RAMPAGE: World Tour only gets you to day 103.

Incidentily, I stopped playing RAMPAGE: World Tour after day 104.

SAD: THE NEW HAPPY

Smurfy — 2005-01-04T11:01:16-05:00

I think I have "SAD". Seasonal Affective Disrder. The winter blues, those things. Symptoms include Lethargy (I'm there), Increased appetite, weight change,And a loss of interest in activites (Look at my last few blog entries! 5 or 6 sentences.)

Stupid winter.

If anything, I'm happy with the weather anyway.

Thank you, Mr. Ray Hogan. "THE STAMFORD ADVOCATE"!

Deal with it. I'm bored.

Smurfy — 2005-01-04T12:01:14-05:00

What is your name? Smurfy
Spell your name backwards: Yfrums
Date of birth: 12/18/88
Astrological sign: Saggitarius

Height: 5'6
Where do you reside now? Lewisvilleish
Age: 16
Screen names: Raining SkyFire, Ultra SmurfyBot, Super SmurfyBot, KingMelt, RetroZapper
E-mail addy: Smurfy@triad.rr.com
What does your screen name stand for? Absolutely nothing, not a single one of them. I'm just an idiot, and that's that.
Pets: a dog, 5 cats, a bird, fish, ...Goats
Shoe size: 12.
Righty or lefty? righto.
Wearing: Shorts, my plaid..ish shirt, and the tan one under it. And a class ring. And one sock.

Hearing: "Can't get enough of you baby- Smash Mouth" And that bird.

. . . F a m i L y S t u F f. . .
How many siblings do you have? One.
What are your parents names? James, Tracee.
What are your siblings names? ...Ariana
How many siblings does your mother have? 1
How many siblings does your father have? 2
Where are your parents from? My dad's from here, Mom's from here.
Does your family get together for holidays? Allllll the time. Rednecks do that. Ish.
Any medical problems run through your family? Cancer, alzheimers.

Does someone in your family wear a toupee? Not on the stewart side.
Do you have any nieces or nephews? Nope.
Are your parents divorced? no
Do you have step parents? nope.
Has your family ever disowned another member of your family? no, not once.
Did some of your family come to America from another country? Generations back, yes.

. . . M u s i C S t u F f. . .
What song do you swear was written about you or your life? Bad Karma, Warren Zevon
What's the most embarrassing cd you own? "Pokemon- 2 B A Master"

What's the best cd you own? Um....Gah, Smash Mouth.
What song do you absolutely hate? whew...um..It's rap, but no idea what song.
Do you sing in the shower? Why not?
What song reminds you of that special someone? um... Goodnight Julia.

. . . F a v O r i T e S. . .
Color: Blue.
Food: Pasta, Chilli, um,.... Burgers, food that makes my arteries cry.
Song: ABBA- Money, Money, Money

Show: Conan!
School subject: Theater.
Band/singer: Smash mouth

Animal: Dogs.

Radio station: 92.3, 100.3, 106.5....Plus, many more!
Movie: Office Space
Pair of shoes: My um...Dr. Scholls.

Drink: Moutain Dew LiveWire, Sundrop, Cheerwine.
Alcholic drink: I'll pass.
Holiday: hmmm.... Not sure.

Pizza topping: pepperoni
Website: Http://cube.ign.com

Number: 14
Cereal: Lucky Charms!
Dessert: Anything. Anything.
Disney character: Die, survey.
Pastime: Video Games, this blog of mine.
Carnival game/ride: That new one at our fair that's like dropzone, "Kraken" at sea world...
Candy bar: 3 musketeers
Things to do on the weekend: Sleep, not work.
Hot drink: Hot chocolate
Season: In the middle of summer and fall.
Sport to watch: Football.
Person to talk to online: Anyone who can actually type.

What color are your sheets? Blue
What color are your bedroom walls? Blue
Do you have posters on your wall? No, I used to, but not since I repainted
If so of what? Later.
Do you have a tv in your bedroom? Absolutely.
How many pillows are on your bed? 2
What do you normally sleep in? jean shorts, tshirt
How many people can comfortably sleep in your bed? One, and a small midget.

What color is the carpet in your room? Blue

. . . H a v 3 Y 0 u 3 v e R. . .(Good lord, who wrote this?)
Mooned anyone? Yeah.

Been on a diet? ....No.
Been to a foreign country? Yeah..
Broken a bone? Nope
Swallowed a tooth/cap/filling? ..O_o...No.
Laughed so hard you peed your pants? No.
Told a secret you swore not to tell? Kind of.
Misused a swear word and it sounded absolutely stupid? Don't quite get you there, survey?

Been on tv? 3 or 4 times.
Been on the radio? twice.
Been in a mosh pit? ish
Been to a concert? Not really
Dated one of your best friends? No.
Deceive somebody close to you? All the time

Been to a rodeo? No

Been on an airplane? No.

Got to ride on a firetruck? No.
Came close to dying? Twice.
Cheated on a bf/gf? No.
Gave someone a piggy back ride? Ha, TONI!

Felt like you didn't belong? Alll the time.
Felt like the 3rd wheel? Often.
Had your tonsils removed? No.
Gone to camp? Boyscout daycamp, yeah
Written a love letter? ..Ish.
Gone out of your way to be with the one you love? Kind of.
Slow danced with someone you love? No.
Stolen a kiss? No.
Asked a friend for relationship advice? Not intentioanlly.
Had a friend steal your bf/gf? HAD to? O_o...No.
Had to wear a uniform to work? No work.
Won a trophy? 2001 Yankees, NWFALL champions. There's alot of story there. Alot.
Roasted pumpkin seeds? No.
. . .R a m d o m . . .
Do you play any sports? I played baseball for one and a half seasons.
What is the dumbest movie you've ever seen? ...Horror.
What is your dream car? The smurfmobile, which I already have
Do you think you're good looking? Sometimes
Do others think you are good looking? Bad ego, bad.
How many rooms do you have in your house? um...::counts:: 10.
Are you afraid of roller coasters? Absolutely Not.
Do you own a pool table? Used to.
Do you have a pool? Used to.
Ever wished on a shooting star? No.
Best Halloween costume you ever wore? Brooke's party, Dr Freakenstien.
Do you carry any weapons on you? Besides...um..No.

Future daughters name: Not quite sure.

Future sons names: Charlie, Wiley, Avery, Lindsay (all my grandfathers)

What is your ideal way to die? Tragically, in a heroic manner, with a long soliloquey.
How do you release stress? Go away.
Are you a trendy person? hahahahaha. No.
Are you an artistic person? artsy, yes, artisitc, no.
Are you a realistic person? Sometimes
Do you un-tie your shoes every time you take them off? No
Are you a strong person? Sometimes
What is your greatest accomplishment? Rocketman: The ultimate hero
Do you like to burn candles or incense? Terrible. No.
Worst feeling in the world? Loneliness.
Are you in love right now? Not anymore.
If so, with who? Lies.
What's your favorite phrase? What will be, will be.

The way to a zombie's heart is through his brain.

Smurfy — 2005-01-04T10:01:55-05:00

Lounge Against The Machine.

And are any of you aware that the remake of "Dawn of the dead" has, quite possibly, the best opening credits scene since "William Shakespeares Romeo and Juliet"?

Let me tell you what, layering one of Johnny Cash's last songs over broken footage of zombie attacks, and you have one heck of a show coming up.

School: Back in Session, ready to eat you ALIVE.

Smurfy — 2005-01-05T09:01:20-05:00

Well, school was in session again today, and it couldn't have started better. But, you know, by 2nd period I could tell I was on sucky-day-express. Short breaks were presented in the form of theater arts, where we have like, 8 new people. Two new guys in the class. Ghetto looking fellows. That can only be a bad thing. It bothers me, the new people. We need a name for them. Because, you know, they didn't experience any of the things the rest of the class did. Badddd.

Besides that, we got to enjoy on lecture on the importance of minor characters in acting, and listen to kate laugh and cough to death. She knows, yeah, she knows. Sarah and I exchanged a hearty chuckle, knowing kate wanted to flip mrs hubbard off, right there. Right then. RIGHT then. But excluding that, I had to listen to everyone in math class flirt with that stupdi gyu from florida or wherever, while I sat in the corner RELISHING how I managed to fail Biology, AND math exams.

AND.

::bangs his head on the desk:::

In other news, I managed to find "Nectar in a sieve", AND return the excorcist books.

But boy, did it feel good again today. Weatherwise. That's right, there, you crazy socialists. I said I love this weather. LOVE IT.

Woodrow Wilson's release date is so agonizingly close now, it's killing me.

"WELL NOW SMURFY, HYUK, IT'S FIVE LOLOLOL MONTHS AWAY!"

Yeah, I'm looking at you Blake. I'm looking at you. WITH A GUN.

:: points his fingers::

Want some, foo'?!

In other news, school food SUCKS.

3 hours= WASTED.

Smurfy — 2005-01-06T10:01:38-05:00

6:34: I am GOING to be at Rampage: World Tour today, seriously.

9:28: Son of a friggin dirty english salad maker, that was the worst ending ever.

You HAVE to be kidding me, now I have to buy Rampage: Universal Tour? HAHAHAHA!

NEVER.

And lo and behold, Lizzy actually HAS the lounge against the machine album. I'm all over that, fool. Also, speed bumps are the reason we invented mace and hairspray.

STRESS! OH STRESS! We put our BLAME on you!

Smurfy — 2005-01-07T06:01:45-05:00

This has been the longest, most stressful 3 day week of school I've ever gone through. I'm totally wore out...

In other news,

Census Lists Renamed Lake As 'Butthead'

LAKE STEVENS, Wash. (AP) - Someone in the Census Bureau may be watching a little too much MTV. Bevis Lake, a 5.7-acre body of water in a forested area about 25 miles northeast of Seattle, is now appearing in Bureau records with a different name: Butthead Lake.

Those two names - Bevis and Butthead - are almost identical to the 1990s MTV cartoon show ``Beavis and Butt-head,'' which featured a pair of slacker teenagers who watch music videos and make bad jokes.

Someone at the Census Bureau must have gotten bored and made a joke out of naming the lake, said Ken Brown, a land surveyor with the state Department of Natural Resources.

``It's got to be,'' he said.

It's not unusual for small lakes in out-of-the-way places to have different names because of variations in county, state or other official records, but there are no such indications in this case, Brown said.

``That means someone is playing a joke, I think,'' Brown said.

"GAR" roxorz.

Smurfy — 2005-01-07T11:01:52-05:00

You're right, I'm still not going to give you people a legitimate entry. I'm too busy reading up on "Land of the dead", courtesy of Sir Jason. The fourth in the "Night of the living dead" series by Geroge Romero. You know, Night, Dawn, Day, and what was going to be "Twilight", and "Dead reckoning". But, you know, Land works too. The premise you see, is that there is one last human outpost on earth. The zombie's have claimed everything else. All the humans are inside one giant walled city, which keeps out them bad zombies. The outpost is guarded by the tank team, "Dead Reckoning". It sound exotic, you know. It can't be as bad as "Children of the living dead", and it looks much better then "Day of the dead 2: Contagium" I'm a zombie whore. A zombie whore. You hear me? a zombie whore. It's so...SAD... Poor, poor, pitiful me....Hmmm... I'd lay my head on the railroad tracks And wait for the Double "E" But the railroad don't run no more Poor, poor pitiful me Poor, poor pitiful me Poor, poor pitiful me These young girls won't let me be Lord have mercy on me Woe is me Well, I met a girl in West Hollywood I ain't naming names She really worked me over good She was just like Jesse James She really worked me over good She was a credit to her gender She put me through some changes, Lord Sort of like a Waring blender Poor, poor pitiful me Poor, poor pitiful me These young girls won't let me be Lord have mercy on me Woe is me Well, I met a girl at the Rainbow bar She asked me if I'd beat her She took me back to the Hyatt House I don't want to talk about it Poor, poor pitiful me Poor, poor pitiful me These young girls won't let me be Lord have mercy on me Woe is me (Well, I met a girl from the Vieux Carre` Down in Yokahama She picked me up and she throwed me down I said, "Please don't hurt me, Mama")

Hot diggity!

Smurfy — 2005-01-08T07:01:04-05:00

Behold! The old mindsay AIM readable feature thing is back. I'm so overjoyed. Ish. You're right, I'm the only person in the entirity of the globe that wanted it back, but, hello, it's there. Funny thing about pizza delivery men. Are they allowed to speak, or do they have computer chips or slave collars that deny this power? Let's review here. A Pizza Hut delivery man comes to the door. The pizza I ordered is here. I look at him and say, Hello! how are you doing! He stares at me, then moves the pizza boxes towards me. I take them and say thanks. Then hand him $23 dollars because I'm a tip-whore. He then sort of leaves. Just, leaves. Just like that.

Odd, you know. The heck witht hat, why did I give him a $3 dollar tip. If you want a tip, Mr. Pizza Hut delivery man, you at least call me an obnoxuious little runt like the Little Ceaser's people do.

In other news, scientists announced today from the CN tower in washington, that weekends are too short.

Incidentally, has anyone ever sent a fax to someone, you know, 23 or 25 times that just reads "YOU SUCK AS A PERSON"? Or otherwise receieved a fax, 23 to 25 times that simply reads "YOU SUCK AS A PERSON"?

Courtesy of Leah

Smurfy — 2005-01-08T09:01:37-05:00

Simply go HERE! http://thesurrealist.co.uk/slogan.cgi

It's Good To Talk Smurfy's Blog.

The Smurfy! sign means KEEP MOTORING!

weekend blues

Smurfy — 2005-01-09T08:01:25-05:00

Another weekend full of my parents and I'm going to lose my mind. ...This is too much.

I took some new pictures, they are on my myspace. Check em out

http://profiles.myspace.com/users/7129907

Amy: Well, that looks like checkmate

Luke: Understandably, you cheated.

Amy: And understandably, you lost.

Luke: Lost?

Amy: Yes. Lost.

Luke- I think you’re wrong, Amy. Quite wrong. Because, you see, if I don’t acknowledge that you claim a checkmate, there isn’t a checkmate.

Amy- Just because you ignore the moves, it doesn’t make them disappear.

Luke-It does if I knock over the board.

(Luke knocks over the chess board)

Luke- Now the problem isn’t there. The problem that never was, of course.

Amy- There was no problem for me. And I won.

Luke- You didn’t win. I knocked over the board. The pieces are not in the right places.

Amy- Wait.

(Amy sets the whole board back up)

Amy- We will play again.

Luke- We never played the first time.

Amy- Yes we did.

Luke- There’s no evidence. You just keep saying things.

Amy- You’re a sore loser.

Luke- You’re a propagandist.

Amy- There’s no such word.

Luke- Checkmate. (Luke knocks over the chess board again)

Amy- You’re a very hard person to get along with, Luke.

Luke- And Amy, you’re a filthy liar.

(They sit in silence)

Amy- So you want to play Checkers?

Luke- Yes. Lets.

Noticeable

Smurfy — 2005-01-09T10:01:38-05:00

So I was at lunch friday. I was sitting beside carrie, and the pillowmaker children were as usual, discussing things which are above my level of concentration, right at the level where I zone out and notice that for some reason I'm no longer a straight a student. Then I slam my last half of sub down.

"I'm never eating another one of these stupid sub's again. This is terrible."

Carrie looks at me and says

"Smurfy, shutup. You eat that everyday, and you SAY that, EVERYDAY. You go up there, and you buy the same sub, with the turkey, and the pastuerized cheese, with the chocolate milk, aned the stupid potato chips. And you say, every single day, that it's terrible and you will never eat another one. And then you do, and then you do again, so, stop complaigning, or go through a different line."

"Did you mention the potato chips?" I asked.

"Yes, smurfy, I did. I mentioned the potato chips."

"Is it really that noticeable?"

(The table murmurs)

"Hm...Well maybe I'll eat a ham sub tommorow"

I thought to myself, as I walked off in the usual direction.

PLUS EMO PICTURE!

In other news too, the same thing happened.

Smurfy — 2005-01-10T07:01:54-05:00

I went to liberty resturaunt, up the road. I sat down and Lucy, the waitress who's been there generation upon generation, you know, since it was the dinner bell pre-liberty,

She comes over to to the table and asks what we want, blah blah, usual, then she goes to me and says

I bet you want the spaghetii with meat sauce, garlic bread...and....I think ranch dressing.

I sat there and said,

Well, yes, yes I do. I ALWAYS want the spaghetii with meat sauce with garlic bread and ranch dressing.

In english class, the usual happened, with, you know, the "Dude, we h8 u smurfy" stuff. It's happened alot lately.

We were quoting a little values poll thing, and I, being the most obnoxious person, led our group.

"So, question...8... It's good to never lose faith? I said 2."

Random girl A: um....One?

Random girl B: hahaha. One.

Random girl C: ...One.

Jason: ONE. Dude, you're a DICK smurfy.

Smurfy:....Fine, so, I guess our group number..is..um..One.

Jason: Right, not TWO.

Random Girls A & C: Yeah.

So, you know, as usual, I got the odd stares and the awkward laughter and the whole shpeal.

Yes, I said Shpeal.

Did I misspell it? Yes. Tough luck.

Get over it, poncho.

Then jason's contact popped out. Then in 7th period my contact fell apart in my eye and made things very uncomfortable.

But, you see, Katie, the reason I DIDN'T bring your camera back today was that ::static::.........::static::: And THATS the reason.

Merry christmas, my splendid and mostly confused bloggers!

It is doooooooone! ::dances::

Smurfy — 2005-01-10T09:01:28-05:00

The first thing I've started, that I've sat down and finished in a very long time.

I'm very happy with it. If you find any typo's, point them out.

"Checkmate"

(Amy moves her rook)

Amy- Well, that looks like checkmate

Luke- Understandably, you cheated.

Amy- And understandably, you lost.

Luke- Lost?

Amy- Yes. Lost.

Luke- I think you’re wrong, Amy. Quite wrong. Because, you see, if I don’t acknowledge that you claim a checkmate, there isn’t a checkmate.

Amy- Just because you ignore the moves, it doesn’t make them disappear.

Luke-It does if I knock over the board.

(Luke knocks over the chess board)

Luke- Now the problem isn’t there. The problem that never was, of course.

Amy- There was no problem for me. And I won.

Luke- You didn’t win. I knocked over the board. The pieces are not in the right places.

Amy- Wait.

(Amy sets the whole board back up)

Amy- We will play again.

Luke- We never played the first time.

Amy- Yes we did.

Luke- There’s no evidence. You just keep saying things.

Amy- You’re a sore loser.

Luke- You’re a propagandist.

Amy- There’s no such word.

Luke- Checkmate. (Luke knocks over the chess board again)

Amy- You’re a very hard person to get along with, Luke.

Luke- And Amy, you’re a filthy liar.

(They sit in silence)

Amy- So you want to play Checkers?

Luke- Yes. Lets.

Amy- But how can I be sure you won’t be pigheaded about checkers?

Luke- As long as you will stop making things up, we can live through any of my little mistakes.

Amy- What if you were the only one making mistakes, Luke.

Luke- Well, if I was, which I’m not, I would play checkers.

Amy- Luke, have you ever thought for a minute, (She starts setting up the checkers board) just ONE minute, that you’re a difficult person to get along with?

Luke- I’ve thought that for many minutes, Amy. Many minutes. But I always come back to the same conclusion. There is no such thing as checkmate.

Amy- You are a very difficult person to get along with.

Luke- I know.

Amy- It’s your move.

(Luke moves his piece to the other side of the board)

Amy- What are you DOING?

Luke- I don’t like how things are looking, so I changed them around a bit.

Amy- You can’t do that. That’s not legal!

Luke- Since when are you a walking RULEBOOK Amy. Just relax. Make up some rules.

(Amy stares at him in silence, then says “Checkmate”)

Luke- There’s no checkmate in checkers.

(Amy knocks over the board)

Luke- You clean up that mess.

Amy- I didn’t make it.

Luke- The heck you didn’t. Clean up that mess.

Amy- You knocked the board over Luke, I was singing.

Luke- You were not singing.

Amy- You’re right. You were singing Luke.

Luke- Amy, do you know that you’re a liar?

Amy- Luke, did you know that I know, that you know I’m a liar?

Luke- We’re not playing word games. We’re playing board games. We’re playing checkers.

Amy- You’re right. Which is why you’re picking up those checkers pieces.

Luke- I have a better idea. Let’s play clue.

Amy- Yes. Let’s.

(They sit there, in silence, staring at each other)

Amy- Well, do you have clue?

Luke- No, I haven’t a clue at all.

Amy- But do you have the game? Clue?

Luke- No.

Amy- You’re a very difficult person to get along with Luke.

Luke- I’m not usually like this. I’m usually a very cheery person. A person who loves to play clue. I am a clue master.

Amy- But you don’t have the game?

Luke- Have what game?

Amy- Clue.

Luke- I’ve never heard of that game, how do you play it?

Amy- You said you were the champion. Of clue.

Luke- No, you just said I was the clue champion. I have never played clue.

Amy- This conversation is very circular, you know, Luke.

Luke- I think it’s more of a square.

Amy- A square conversation?

Luke- Amy, I love you.

Amy- What?

Luke- I said I loved you.

Amy- Wh...What?

Luke- It’s not very complex. But it’s there. The love, that is.

Amy- I, on the other hand, have very little love for you.

Luke- That is alright. It must be hard for you to love people. You have problems connecting with people.

Amy- What do you MEAN I .a...WHAT are you TALKING about?

Luke- See, you keep yelling. And you lose your temper.

Amy- But you’re so annoying, Luke. I only have problems connecting with YOU. You are a plain outright jerk!

Luke- What if I’m not?

Amy- What if you’re not what?

Luke- What if I’m not a jerk?

Amy- But you are.

Luke- But, let’s hypothesize here. Let’s say I wasn’t.

Amy- Then....?

Luke- Then what.

Amy- Then maybe I could, “CONNECT” with you.

Luke- I don’t think you would.

Amy- I don’t think you think very much at all.

Luke- Because you’re a liar. You were a liar during the chess game, a liar when we tried to play checkers, and you’re lying now.

Amy- I’m going to leave. Goodbye.

Luke- Goodbye, Amy. Love you!

Amy- So long.

(They both sit there)

Luke- Amy, have you ever read “Waiting For Godot”?

Amy- No.

Luke- I see.

Amy- So, are we playing clue or not.

Luke- Why are you so repetitive.

Amy- I’m.. NOT.

Luke- Then I win. Checkmate.

Amy- You win WHAT.

Luke- The war of wits.

Amy- I wasn’t playing. We weren’t playing any game called war of wits.

Luke- Yes we were. And I got checkmate.

Amy- No you didn’t, I quit before you won.

Luke- Hahahaha.

Amy- What are you laughing at?

Luke- You’re so cute when you’re mad.

Amy- I am not cute when I’m mad. I’m very tough when I’m mad.

Luke- Oh, will you hit me?

Amy- I might.

Luke- I think you will.

Amy- I will.

Luke- I am sad, then.

Amy- Good.

Luke- Well, I think I’m leaving.

Amy- Bye.

Luke- So long.

Amy- See you later.

(Luke stands up)

Amy- Where are you going?

Luke- Away.

Amy- Why?

Luke- I want to play clue.

Amy- You are an idiot, Luke.

Luke- I know. I oft--

Amy- No, you don’t know.

Luke- Oh.

Amy- You’re an idiot.

Luke- I’m glad we agree then.
Amy- Yes. Me too.

Luke- Well, goodbye. And, you know, despite your blatant insecurities, and you’re obvious lack of entertainment value, with all the mental problems you have, not to mention the fact that you’re very plump, plump to the point that I would dare to call you a very fat little woman, or a very wide dwarf, I still somehow seem to find beauty in the fact that you’re obviously too intelligent to lose at Clue.

Amy- Wow...that....that kind of hurts my feelings...and you said you didn’t play clue anyway

Luke- I do now. I killed Amy with a knife in the board game room.

Amy- You don’t have a knife.

Luke- Yes I do. I verbally knifed you. I won. Checkmate.

Amy- Well, you know Luke, I would like to say that you’re a very inconsiderate person, who can’t stand to lose anything, a cheater, an egotistical masochist, and a fool. A FOOL. I can’t STAND you. You are the most IRRITATING person I’ve ever MET. PLUS, when we met on the phone, you said you were a red-haired man who played chess professionally.

Luke- And Amy, I’d have to say you’re right. Perfectly right. But I still won. I killed Amy with a knife in the board game room.

Amy- Well I shot you with a revolver. You lose.

Luke- No, we both lost.

Amy- Fine.

Luke- Exactly.

Amy- Well, let’s have a play-off with chutes and ladders then. Whoever wins chutes and ladders, wins clue.

Luke- Fine.

(Amy sits down, and set sup chutes and ladders)

Luke- You go first.

Amy- Okay.

(She moves)

Luke- Checkmate.

Amy- What?

Luke- I win. I killed Amy with a knife in the board game room.

Amy- You are a jerk, Luke.

Luke- Shut it, fatty. Let’s go to Taco Bell.

Amy- What did you call me?

Luke- I said give it up, gorgeous, we are going out.

Amy- Alright.

Luke- Then let’s go.

Amy- Yes, let’s.

Luke. Checkmate. I win.

Amy- Yes, you did. You’re very good at War Of Wits.

Luke- I try.

(They leave)

Middle School Madness

Smurfy — 2005-01-11T08:01:04-05:00

Far unknown to me, I was destined to spend 30 minutes inside what I fondly like to remember as "The place I'd like to forget", or, you know, Meadowlark Middle School.

I was picked up from my drama club "Board" meeting, which consisted of brooke being in a pissy mood and fussing at me for saying there was 47 dollars in the cans imply because thats what everyone int he world + norway told me, plus some random baby that someone had they just laid on a table and left. Really.

But, you know, in a way it was one of the best so far, I managed to stay focused and not say anything stupid like usual. Anyway, after I walked out and left, I was told we had to go pick up my ghetto/or preppy sister from Meadowlark. Unfortunetelly, it was from a middle school basketball game. More unfortunate, was that there was about 45 minutes left in the game. Or so.

I went and bought a bag of doritos outside their tiny gym from what looked like a 6 or 7 year old kid, but I suppose was in 6th or 7th grade or something. I then proceded to walk around the little buldings there, looking over the old PE field, going into the 8th grade hallway and looking into what was our art room, 2nd period B day.

It's still the same, really, but so different, looking on it with eyes of remembrence. Stupid school.

Plus, the doritios weren't very good. Very broken. Bad bag!

As I walked back in, listening to the kids scream "GO MUSTANGS GO", I just had to mentally flick them all off. But then, I setpped in mud.

And then, hey, meadowlark lost.

More of "Hallelujah" by Jeff Buckley, please.

PS thankyou for actually reading that bizarre twisted play I'm so very proud of all you crazy bloggers you.

~(The gramatically incorrect) Smurfy

Bloggin' in the math class!

Smurfy — 2005-01-12T11:01:26-05:00

Ashley Bowman sits here, beside me. Dying.

And you know, the funny thing about being in this computer lab again is that, you know, before, She wasn't dying, and now, amazingly, she is. DYYIIIIING.

(Also, I didn't draw that picture)

DROP IT LIKE IT'S HOT. BUT IT'S COLD.

Smurfy — 2005-01-12T04:01:29-05:00

You know, it may be a combination of an easy set of classes, with the temperture, (very groovy) along with lack of significant homework, no tests tommorow, sweethearts, it looks like for once I've had a good solid reggae stylin' day. It'll all come creshing down, in say, I dunno, 2.5 hours max, but until then, ladies and gentlemen, it isn't WEDNESDAY,

It is a GROOVESday.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-13T04:01:21-05:00

Bus freshmen suck slightly more then regular freshmen.

Anything, anything, anything goes.

Smurfy — 2005-01-13T08:01:54-05:00

Well, Anything Goes, eh?

So, you know, getting to decide when I want to leave and when I want to get somehwere is pretty intoxicating. Which reminds me! DON'T DRIVE DRUNK. I learned that from watching Reno 911, Because I like "Edu-tainment".

On the short side, I think having a license is swell. Swell. You know? Anyway.

In civics, us in the "Amen Corner" reminisced..e..re.a...rem...screw it, it's a typo. We were discussing the past events of the class that have proven to be our only means of entertainment. This focuses mainly on Amber spitting half a bottle of water out because she laughed at something, you know, that was a blast, and then theres the whole Schwarzeneggar/Kerry stuff, you know, politics, it's good for a laugh (Imagine that). After that, the coffee house substitute looked at us oddly, (As I was recalling how a sub once called me kung-fun man, and another, "Chipmunk laugh boy" ) . Thats right, Mr. Clyburn, don't get well soon. Freakin' idiot.

In other news, we offended Femi.

During english, Jason, Phillip, a random number of odd white ladehs and I, quickly learned the values of doing your homework. And also, that clothes disentegrate. Along with the fact that we're not taking a boombox, like femi is. No one takes a boom-box when you're running from the police. No one. NO ONE. Except, you know, Our beloved friend Femi.

Capital O.

In theater arts, of course, we played improv, to celebrate the 30-somethingeth year of hubbard's life, which was topped off by my playing of a chinese bullfighter, and kate sort...of...making disco references while doing the robot. (Disco SPACEMAN?!)

Also, some random fellow asked me if my last name was smurfy. I said yes, yes it was. He then demanded to know the "You got thrown throuhg a window" story, which for some reason I've been asked about alot lately. Yes. I got thrown through a window. Last year. CRRRRAZY STUFF!

-A rather odd fellow, named smurfy.

Are you going to copy this? Yes.

Smurfy — 2005-01-13T08:01:20-05:00

I am worth $1,980,300.00

Yeeeeeah, sucka! GO see how much YOU'RE worth, silly humans.

The mysterious 8:00 dog.

Smurfy — 2005-01-13T09:01:19-05:00

As I was looking at my window and throwing soda cans outside and shooting them with my Pellet Rifle, I heard an odd :Cling cling: noise. I saw in the shadows a small little terrier dog, and I saw as he ran towards the porch. I set the gun down, and ran outside to find the little dog on the porch. Long story short, 45 minutes later, and about as many dog treats, I had the sir cornered on the deck, just as I heard someone coming down from the queens driveway with a flashlight yelling for a dog. I ran out (In my now ruined socks, of course), and, you know, after a brief intermission, he took my last dog treat, and put ihm in a car and drove off.

Moral of the story:

Never go outside in the rain with your socks on.

NO ANECDOTES, CHILDREN.

Smurfy — 2005-01-14T09:01:39-05:00

After many misadventures with ...um...

Yeah, screw it, there are no anecedotes today.

I can't think of a single one!

Not ONE! Isn't it just depressing?

Although, there was that incident after theater, but that was bascially just getting eaten alive for saying carlos is a sucky person.

Apparently, I yelled it to loud at practice, or maybe hubbard was just giving a subliminal message to sarah and I (Along with kate, who just left), to turn it all offendeding gossipists. I myself, am going to refrain from not being annoying, simply because smurfy is a very annoying fellow.

Also, Chinese bullfighting!

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-15T12:01:47-05:00

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-15T05:01:01-05:00

So, we finally broke down and bought a new monitor. It's amazing. I can see colors again. And...Pictures..and./..

It's beautiful. Like a rainbow. OF POPUP ADS.

I can even see my headers now. And it looks like that one needs to go away. It's in development.

Also, circuit city techies are the most irritating people there ever could be.

TAKE THIS SEAN O'CONNER!

Smurfy — 2005-01-16T04:01:55-05:00

Sean O'Conner, for inventing "SLAY", (The hottest PC game since "DUKE NUKEM" ), you get SLAPPED.

::slap::

I GET the PICTURE

Smurfy — 2005-01-16T10:01:54-05:00

Okay, bad idea. We made that last entry "JUST ME" for the sake of getting rid of any lingering afterthought of what will from now on be called "The worst idea smurfy ever had for a blog entry"

To get your mind off that, here's the boxart for the coolest Star Fox game to date.

YOU LOSE +6 BONUS COMBO

Smurfy — 2005-01-17T02:01:42-05:00

I bet you can't guess what I'm NOT going to blog about today.

Answer: Anything.

Weapon of choice- Chainsaw, Baseball bat, hammer....or..S... SWORD

Smurfy — 2005-01-17T08:01:03-05:00

That "Pulp Fiction", is a right good movie. What's one thing John Travolta, Jason, And smurfy all have in common?

Why, betty of course!

HIRO SHUKAI

Smurfy — 2005-01-18T04:01:32-05:00

So, I woke up this morning, put on my new clothes, hopped in the jet car, and hurried off to school. Super School. For super heroes. Then, after dodging some mudlsides, and a rampaging bull of death, I arrived at my destination, fully aware that any movement in this camp of insanity would be my last. Then, of course, I woke up from sleeping in spanish as the bell rang, and I left.

Dissapointed that once again, nothing intresting or humourous had happened, despite an argyument between Jason and Phillip this morning about how to spell the word "Righteous".

I think that some good karma may have caught up with me, and it's killing me. Killing me. Where's the drama! The dissapointment! The ANGUISH. Where's it at? It's inside this Japanese heavy metal song from cowboy bebop.

"HEAVY METAL QUEEN"

::Jams::

Nothing like japanese heavy metal to get the blood and ramen pumping around in your system, you know? So, like all good children who blog about nothing but claim it has importance somewhere, I'm going to get my stuff ready for tonight's play practice. My character int he musical in an obnoxious rude loud flirtatious jerk. It's basically me on paper. And I love it to death. Plus, I get to bumble about when I lsoe my glasses. If there's one thing I like, it's bumbling about. Looking for glasses. While Japanese heavy metal plays.

HIRO SHUKAI!

Here's to hoping that something amusing happens soon, for the sake of my blog.

~Smurfy, the one man who lsitens to Japanese heavy metal.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-19T04:01:42-05:00

And in other news, the moon shone brightly at 3:45 today.....

"Second Term"

Smurfy — 2005-01-19T08:01:20-05:00

mannn, democrats, republicans, and you one or none libertarians, rejoice, there's a new jibjab, which is good.

http://jibjab.com/lowband/default.htm

NAHHHH

Smurfy — 2005-01-20T08:01:24-05:00

Check it OUT. http://readysetblog.com

Can you beleieve it, I got on there TWICE, along with Mr. Gramatically Correct himself, SecretSanta.

Suddenly, I feel like making sense is fun again.

Haha, just kidding. I don't.

Smurfy: Sing, or AntiSing

Smurfy — 2005-01-20T08:01:20-05:00

Well, Ladies and gentlemen, once again I was left without any anecedotes for the day. Of course there was something I wanted to write, but I forgot, as usual. Most of the afternoon was spent with myself feeling rather stupid.

Check THIS, so, it's 7th period, you know? And all the sudden, it's decided that all the honor roll kids can go to their little nerd-bash (Which I used to be a faithful member of), and suddenly, everyone but 5 kids in the class leave. Five. Leaving me, Ferris, Richard, (who left, because we made fun of his hair and et cetera) Christin, who just didn't want to leave for some unexplained reason, and that chris guy.

It's times like these, that make me wish I didn't make D's in Geometry. But, you know, stuff happens. Like nerd-bashes. Which I used to attend. Blah blah blah, we've been through this before. Let's move on with our lives.

__________

Exorcist III was on AMC last night, and it still caught my attention like the first time. Kinderman's final monologue is still amazing. I looked for an hour online for a script, or a copy of that monologue, but I can't find it. Anyone know where I could find it?

Kinderman's monologue.

Smurfy — 2005-01-21T10:01:53-05:00

Only one thing of importance occured today.

As I was leaving math, a tall man with a bad haircut came up to me.

"ARE YOU SMURFY?!"

I get alot of this these days. So I said,

"Yeah...why?"

Then the guy just punches me right in the shoulder

"I HATE GUYS WITH NICKNAMES"

Then leaves. I've never seen the guy before, and I didn't see him again.

It was a pretty nice punch too.

Also, Theater Arts guest-starred Blake for partially explained reasons,

And furthermore, Jason remembered that that movie was "Falling Down", and got that monologue. Not much of a day, but a day nontheless!

JAMES: So, have I helped your unbelief?

KINDERMAN: Oh, yes. I believe. I believe in death. I believe in disease. I believe in injustice and inhumanity, torture and anger and hate... I believe in murder. I believe in pain. I believe in cruelty and infidelity. I believe in slime and stink and every crawling, putrid thing... every possible ugliness and corruption, you son of a bitch. I believe... in YOU.

Here's to hoping for a Directors cut of Legion.

What time did you get up this morning? Later then usual.

What was the last film you saw at the cinema? um..Oh..u_u...Fat Albert.. ::kills himself::

What is your favorite TV show? Aqua Teen Hunger Force

What did you have for breakfast? Pop-tarts.

What is your middle name? James.

What is your favorite cuisine? Italian or Chinese

What foods do you dislike? Not many. Regular beans. Chilli is fiiiine.

What is your favorite crisp flavor? ..Crisp? O_o...Curse your english slang!

What is your favorite CD at the moment? "Groove Zone Volume 3 by Smurfy"

What kind of car do you drive? A '99 Grand AM SE, seagreen.

Favorite sandwich? Pepperoni from subway, with pickles cheese and black olives.

What characteristic do you despise? I can't stand anybody who is like me at ALL.

Favorite item of clothing? The Phoenix Shadow shirt Im planning an getting soon. Now? My "MEDIEVAL WARRIOR" shirt.

If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Wilmington.

What color is your bathroom? Blue.

Favorite brand of clothing? Whatever feels good.

Where would you retire to? Wilmington.

Favorite time of the day? Night

What was your most memorable birthday? ..Wow..um...maybe my 10th or 11th, I can't remember.

Where were you born? Right here, Winston.

Favorite sport to watch? Football.

Who was your childhood heartthrob? Psh, Amy Jo Johnson.

What fabric detergent do you use? Whaaaaaaaaaa....O_o...This quiz is lame.

Coke or Pepsi? Pepsi, Fool.

Are you a morning person or a night owl? Night. Night. Night. I used to be more of a morning guy though...

What is your shoe size? 11 1/2

Do you have any pets? Way too many. WAY too many.

What did you want to be when you were little? I wanted to be a comic book artist. This dream was stifiled, following the discovery that I can't draw or write worth crap. (My motor skills SUCK)

When theres-NO-evil ON THE ATTACK.

Smurfy — 2005-01-22T03:01:03-05:00

Never wait until 3 for Misterro to upload a movie at 12.

Evil on the attack...Right.

There's nothing attacking ANYTHING, MISTEROO

(Disaster_labs)

DUN DUN DUN

Smurfy — 2005-01-22T02:01:59-05:00

New HEADER, SUCKA!

Loner huh? Totally.

Smurfy — 2005-01-22T07:01:54-05:00

You scored as Loner.

Loner

81%

Drama nerd

69%

Geek

56%

Punk/Rebel

44%

Ghetto gangsta

44%

Goth

44%

Stoner

38%

Prep/Jock/Cheerleader

25%

What's Your High School Stereotype?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Loner.

Loner

81%

Drama nerd

69%

Geek

56%

Punk/Rebel

44%

Ghetto gangsta

44%

Goth

44%

Stoner

38%

Prep/Jock/Cheerleader

25%

Lone Survivor Picked Off India Island After 25 Days

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - A tribal man lived off coconuts for about 25 days on a tsunami devastated Indian island before he was rescued by a search boat, a military officer said on Saturday.

Michael Mangal was brought out of the tiny island of Pillow Panja earlier this week after the crew of a rescue dinghy saw him waving a flag made of his clothes, the officer said.

Mangal, who is from the Nicobarese tribe, told his rescuers the first giant wave which hit the Andaman and Nicobar chain of islands on Dec. 26 first sucked him into sea before subsequents waves threw him back to land.

"After that, once the waters receded he went to his village, but didn't find anybody," the officer told Reuters over telephone from Port Blair, the capital of the remote archipelago which are 1,200 km (750 miles) from the Indian mainland.

"It seems he just survived on coconuts."

Around 7,500 people, a majority of them Nicobarese tribals who normally live on the coast, have died in the island chain which had a population of more than 356,000.

Rescue and relief have been slow in coming to the islands mainly because all the harbor jetties were destroyed. Most of the 36 inhabitated islands in a chain of hundreds of islands can only be reached by sea.

And does anyone see that header, and think of the opening credits "In The Heat Of The Night"?

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-22T09:01:26-05:00

So, Evil on the atack turned out to be the funniest thing I've ever seen Misteroo do. And he's done some funny stuff.

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/214733

It was worth the months of waiting. Now, if only ArfenHouse 3 would come out this year...

Mindsay SUCKS at WIDESCREEN

Smurfy — 2005-01-23T02:01:08-05:00

It's so cold outside it feels like my britches done fell off

Also

Hahahahahaha. "When!"

Also, Mindsay sucks at being widescreen.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-01-23T04:01:07-05:00

Johnny Carson died, at 79.

The world suddenly just grew less funny for some reason

Assault

Smurfy — 2005-01-24T08:01:10-05:00

What a cold I'm getting.

Dust in the wind, that's it. Dust in the wind.

Right now, it's raining on Saturn. The shadows speak many stories.

Blue, Blue, Blue autumn.

English.:: Define Reality TV, class. Smurfy: Annoying things. Some guy: Stupid. Jason: ....NBC ::smile

Smurfy — 2005-01-25T10:01:19-05:00

Define Reality TV, class.

Smurfy: Annoying things.

Some guy: Stupid.

Jason: ....NBC ::smile::

Class: (Laughter)_

Some odd minutes later

Now, define Britney Spears

(Jason and Smurfy exchange glances)

Hahahahahaha.

Jason: A BAD Bobby Brown cover! Haha!

Class: ha..w..a..what? Who's Bobby Brown?

Smurfy: (Don't say slut, don't say slut, don't say slut, don't say slut)

(She's got....really...big....t....a.....t....talent...)

Also,

Smurfy — 2005-01-25T10:01:41-05:00

Just to make sure I aggravate everyonbe by making two entries

What Famous Leader Are You?

QUIT FRONTIN ME AND STEP OFF

Smurfy — 2005-01-26T10:01:26-05:00

Why do the idiots who drive with high beam on constantly ALWAYS get behind me?

And whats up with that AIRLINE food!

Regardless, today went by much better then the last few. There's a new girl at school, who's been here the past two days or so, she reminds me of Britini, who moved back to Pennsylvania. They have the same kind of eyes. She's in my biology class now, I hope to speak to her sometime soon.

Also, Musical practice was somehow enjoyable today. Mostly due to the incidents involving deeter. Because he is terrible with the lady-folk. Terrible.

But, on the other hand, Anything Goes is actually pretty good. I like the tap dance number. I dont think many people have seen that yet though.

Can you believe some people have never heard of the goo goo dolls!?!? QUESTION MARK

So, a few things happened of note today. First off, Ben Key had a revelation. On the bus, he announced,

"Smurfy, I know why you're single. You're a PLAYER!"

4 or 5 days ago, Kristen told me

"Smurfy, you're a PLAYER"

I'm NOT a PLAYER. (PLAYA)

Also, there was a man in the 1000 building. He had a sticky note on his back that said

"IM STUPID"

Some people were laughing at him, megan carrol and Julie Whelan, and I ran up to him and kicked him in the leg and said

"HAHAHA! DUDE! YOU'RE STUPID!" I laughed myself all the way to 6th period.

Also, ash said I was an

Epigrammist

Then THIS happened

SpottedPinkDuck: HA HA SMURFY!!!
Raining SkyFire: O_O
Raining SkyFire: JAZAM! Kristen!
Raining SkyFire: Hi!
SpottedPinkDuck: okay, my friend asked me what i was diong an di said taking this quiz thingy that i stole from smurfy's webpage
SpottedPinkDuck: and he goes "SMURFY? ive heard of him!" ha ha ha
SpottedPinkDuck: and then he said "Jana has heard of him too... adn she doesnt go to west"
SpottedPinkDuck: i found that ammusing
SpottedPinkDuck: EVERYONE knows you
Raining SkyFire: Holy crap, who the heck is Jana.

SpottedPinkDuck: lmao shes a girl
SpottedPinkDuck: my friends friend
Raining SkyFire: Snap!

Lalalalala lies of the living dead

Smurfy — 2005-01-27T09:01:56-05:00

Today was the biggest up and down day in qutie awhile. After listening to Ali about cry in theater because we told her she needed to change half a costume's color, you know, since she's right, ::EYE ROLL::, not much else went amazingly well for the day.

Lunch is always a hassle, you know? After I get bored at the eating place, I'll leave and try to find someone else to talk too, but inevitably my desire to always not be where I'm at is a problem. Also the obessive-compulsiveness.

Then the musical happened again. Musical practices are a mixed bag of laughs and just wanting to go away's. And they come fast, and furious, not ulike the rather crappy movie of the same name. Our only hope, is to figure out how to get to shallowford road.

Blast it, there's beens omething I've meant to write here for the past FOUR days, but I NEVER remember. U_U... Oh, yes, And I am supposed to wish Christin Stewart a happy 16th birthday to her awesomely fantsticness, or she may just kill me alive. Which brings me to another topic I wanted to discuss, Civics class! The best topic since..something. That rhymes with orange. Actually, no, that class sucks.

And the movie that will not suck, BEGINS NOW.

They are doing America, FOR FOUR MORE YEARS.

Smurfy — 2005-01-28T04:01:17-05:00

You ever seen a llama kiss a llama on the llama?

I KNOW IT MUST BE TRUE

Smurfy — 2005-01-29T06:01:21-05:00

So Spider-Man 2 turned out to be a good movie. I liked that.

It's snowing, you know?

You know what this means?

There's a yetti, somewhere around here.

THERE MUST BE.

And HERE are some examples of why talking to me online is a hazard to your health.

I will note, that this is probably why I think I suck at conversations. (And also why people often stop IMing me abruptly)

INCOMING AWKWARD MOMENT

And then sometimes, these kids just don't get that I do NOT want to talk to them. Like this fellow here, who aggravates me to no end often and usually. They got my screename from somewhere, and love to have 7th grade level chats.

Middle School Kid: hehe

Middle School Kid: so wut do u want totalk about

Smurfy: What do I want to talk about, eh?

Smurfy: Well, let's analyze LITERATURE.

Smurfy: I LOVE analyzing LITERATURE

Smurfy: let's do THAT!

Smurfy: It's so much FUN

Middle School Kid: wuts that

Middle School Kid: lik talkin about it

Smurfy: Like, I dunno, finding CRYPTIC and CONFUSING references, and making them FUN

Smurfy: like ZOOBOOKS

Middle School Kid: o ok

Middle School Kid: ok lets talk about something interesting (Smurfy Hint: She isn’t going to talk about ANYTHING interesting)

Middle School Kid: ill ask u questions

Middle School Kid: k

Middle School Kid: ?

Middle School Kid: wut is ur favorite color

Smurfy: Oh, mine is definetelly a unique shade of amber.

Middle School Kid: ok

Middle School Kid: lol

Middle School Kid: now u ask me a question

Smurfy: True or false:

Smurfy: What is the nature of the universe

Middle School Kid: idk

Middle School Kid: not a question lik that silly

Middle School Kid: ok

Middle School Kid: if u could be an animal wut would u b

Smurfy: Oh, me?

Smurfy: Well, let's think.

Smurfy: Oh, a CHUPACABRA.

Middle School Kid: ….ok

(Smurfy Blocks Middle School Kid)

Middle School Kid signed off at 8:18:26 PM.

Smurfy: Dont get lost in any paper bags

Erin: umm ok i wont

Smurfy: the heck you wont

Smurfy: they'll be WET paperbags too

Smurfy: And you'll be LOST

Smurfy: WITHOUT A MAP

Erin: …ok?

Erin signed off at 7:57:56 PM.

Smurfy: And it's STILL snowing.

Some Kid: no its not

Some Kid: is it really?

Smurfy: You must live in the section of the world that sucks right now, then.

Some Kid: let me c then

Smurfy: Because Im getting a snow surplus, fool.

Some Kid: we arent

Smurfy: Oh well.

Smurfy: Guess your life sucks now, huh.

Some Kid: i live in clemmons

Why not, it's cold.

Smurfy — 2005-01-29T06:01:40-05:00

3 Names you go by:
Smurfy, That guy, Smushy.

3 Things you like about your self:
...um...I enjoy my smurfy-funk, my groovy attitude, and my large ego.

3 Things you don't like about your self:
The same thing as above.

3 Things that scare you:
Doom House, A remote control massacre reunion, large amounts of 80's music.

3 Everyday essentials:
My blog, A crappy school turkey sub, wearing the same jeans for months/or years at a time.

3 Things you're wearing right now:
A class ring, headphones, and..oh, it looks like there are 5 popsicle sticks in this pocket, and some toothpicks and a napkin in other, along with a variety of coins.

3 Favorite bands or musical artists (at the moment):
Smash Mouth, Keane, Beck

3 Things you want to try to do in the next 12 months:
Get new jeans, lose some people/luggage, get a better view on life.

Two truths and 1 lie:
I wnated to write something really interesting here, but it's time to eat.

3 Physical things about the opposite (or same) sex that appeal to you:
Laughing at my stupid jokes, having a far-out uncommon view on life, better at conversation then me (I SUCK at it)

3 Things you just can't do:
I can't be serious, I can't finish what I start I ca

3 Favorite hobbies:
Blogging, making up STUPID jokes, writing.

3 Things you want to do really bad right now:
Play populous, talk to some people, finish DOOM HOUSE 2000

3 Careers you're considering:
Acting, teaching, and..um..I have no idea what to do with my life.

3 Places you want to go on vacation:
I only want to be in wilmington.

3 Kids names:
Charlie, James, Avery

3 Things you want to do before you die:
I want to be in/make/write/cameo a movie. I want to drift accross the country. I want to own at least 100 acre's of land.

3 Celeb Crushes:
Most celebrities piss me off.

Why not? I mean, what else is there at 12:30...

Smurfy — 2005-01-30T12:01:04-05:00

What Classic Movie Are You?

GO TO BED, IDIOT.

Smurfy — 2005-01-30T03:01:54-05:00

At 3 Am, the world is NOT ENOUGH.

I NEED CUBA TOO.

Which is why I did this. Apparently, you go do a google image search, and the first picture that comes up for each category, you put here.

Voila.

1. What is my favorite color?

2. What is my favorite game?

3. What is my middle name?

4. What is my favorite toy?

5. What is my last name?

6. What is my nickname?

7. What is the word I use the most?

8. What is my grandfather's name?

9. What year was I born?

10. If I had one wish what would it be?

BAM!

Now aint that somethin

Hahaha. Hey, hey fatty!

Smurfy — 2005-01-30T05:01:06-05:00

Ah boy. The stuff you find on the net.

IIIIII found the Land Of The Dead screenplay

Smurfy — 2005-01-30T08:01:36-05:00

10. INT. Dead reckoning - Night

RILEY and MIKE step into a tight uncomfortable space. Generators whir. Gears turn. The two men open a storage locker and strap on ammo belts as…

…SOMETHING TERRIBLE LOOMS out of the SHADOWS! It moves toward Riley and Mike, who can’t see it from behind the locker. Only scar-tissue remains, and a single usable eye bulging from a socket.

RILEY turns, sees the thing. And, surprisingly, he relaxes, recognizing CHARLIE HOUK, a heavily-armed guerilla whose intellect is as burned as his face.

CHARLIE

What’cha doin’, Riley?

RILEY

Havin’ a bad dream

CHARLIE

I have bad dreams. Hell, yes. Just look at me,

you can tell that I have TERRIBLE dreams.

RILEY

The town is FULL of Walkers

CHARLIE

EVERY town is full of Walkers.

RILEY

But these aren’t just walking.. these are like…

normal folks.

CHARLIE

But they’re DUMB Riley. Hell, dead folks is near

As dumb as ME.

RILEY

You learned how to make yourself useful.

That’s what they’re doing.

George A. Romero

town is full of walkers.

Whatever, call the cops.

Smurfy — 2005-01-31T10:01:11-05:00

So here's an example of bad timing/luck/karma/fate.

So, let's say you're smurfy, right? You want a drink. You go to the drink machine.

You put a magical one dollar bill into the said drink machine.

Now, this is peculiar here,

See, when I tried doing this, I anticipated paying a dollar to the soda machine, and getting a soda. Ah, but my expectations are so eaily thrashed. As I put the dollar in, press the CODE RED button, and it's sold out!

Imagine that.

I press the Dr. Pepper button

Sold out!

Pepsi?

Sold out!

Mountain dew?

Sold out!

So I click the button for your change. It says

VEND!

As in.

It's giving me a soda.

Only it doesn't give me a soda. No soda. No money. Then it goes back to being normal. Now as I stare at it in disbelief, the man with the soda cart wheels up to the machine,

He's refilling the drink machine.

I seriously hate myself sometimes, you know?

____

Turns out that new girl jessica moved back to georgia, you know, after being in north carolina for FIVE DAYS.

They called her out of class the 3rd day she was there, and she's been long gone ever since. It's a shame. A shame.

Today was a mixed bag of sucky endeavors, dancing for the 8th graders, mindless dancing for the hubbard, and, overall, dancing.

Also there was avoidance.

I was thinking, with that jessica girl and everything,

You know, sometimes it would be nice to move somewhere, to be able to start all over, to be able to just, you know....Leave.

It's very attractive, that leaving. But after you think about it, what can you learn by just making your mistakes dissapear. You'll just repeat them if you don't learn how to fix what you mess up.

It sounds so trite. So..Um.. Life skills class. But, it makes sense...

___

Blake and I are quite possibly the worst people to get to advertise for you're club, ever. Plus we can't dance. Honestly. But we did get..um.. Eleven people to sign up for drama club. Out of what..like..100? Yeah.

We suck.

But it was FUN. Plus there was also good classy awkward moments.

Then my thinking impediemnt tmejti pim.. impediment messed me up again. I need to learn how to think.

There's NOTHING better then ...um..Chicken nuggets.

Death to petunias.

Smurfy — 2005-02-01T08:02:13-05:00

Furthermore, anyone caught singing any song which mentions a cruise ship, is to be put to death on the spot.

Also, check out number ten on Blakes livejournal. It is one sweet ride. And by sweet ride I don't mean his favorite color, but whatever shakes your feathers.

I'm once again, left here, making non-paragraphs, and trying to find a point to throw in somewhere. Well, you know what? Screw points. I'm going to give you an English assignment Jason, Phillip and I had a while back. It's a very good paper.

____________________________

Definition of maturity: (How ironic!) Phillip, Jason, (Paritally erased, says: Smurfy)

Term: Class: Features

Maturity Growth Emotional and Spiritual

(Writting by phillip) "Maturity is a type of growth that is emotional and physical." (Written by smurfy) "It's caused by experience...and..."Hormones"." (Written by jason) "Like, when somebody's frontin' and you step off, that's maturity."

(Written by smurfy) F I N

(Teachers comments) Clearly, this assignment was not taken seriously by any of you.

D-

_______________________

Well, folks, that's what you get when you obviosuly don't take an assignment seriously. Sure was heckuva fun though. Ms. Fergusson is going to be so glad when we're gone...

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-01T11:02:12-05:00

So I got that crap theater assignment done. Anyone in my group says anything about it sucking can be pushed over in their chair.

Harry potter can go jump. Friggin lame idea.

RUN I SAY

Smurfy — 2005-02-02T05:02:36-05:00

Someday, I'm going to look back on all this stuff, and I'm going to wonder how I managed to be as odd as I am without the use of drugs/or nyquil.

Junior registration begins.

I'm thinking, Theater arts III, Spanish II, and Computer Accounting I.

Along with the general blah blah of honors US history, honors english, honors enviromental science, and...algebra II.

Sounds like a nice combination of rip your hair out work to me. Should be no problem.

_____________

Also, be on the lookout for the fight of the century,

JASON VS. PHILLIP

Coming to a hallway near you.

_____________

Should be a rockin' good time.

Today at school, a random ghetto lookin' girl grabs my shoulder and says

Hey, kid, you got fifty cents?

Well, after studying the situation, and realizing the only way I'm giving this girl 50 cents is if she begins to cluck like a chicken, much like the old burger king campaign that went nowhere.

So, I began to dance about, and after a little jig I say, oh, I beleieve I have a quarter or two! And I delve into my pockets and produce a piece of paper I found, along with the pencil I keep in my right front pocket at all times, and scribbled

"IOU 50 CENTS, SUCKA"

Too which such a string of middle figners and profanity arose!

Lesson of the day:

If a random ghetto lookin' girl asks for money, just run, kids, run like the DICKENS.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-03T09:02:27-05:00

That happy days special is pretty good.

And boy, have I got a dream to describe.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-03T09:02:11-05:00

Man alive, I've been looking all night for a pirated version of Adobe audition, but I don't have any serial numbers. Kazaaaaaa!

Behold, the rocking power.

And on and ON.

Smurfy — 2005-02-04T09:02:49-05:00

Dancing is the worst way to go. Dancing. Dancing for two hours to evil choreogrpahy. DANCING.

Naturally, I screwed up in the last minute, after most everyone was gone, and I was the last one left.

I really hate myself sometimes, you know?

But besides that, I'm trying to think of a good way to describe my "Zombie attack" dream. I think I've spent way to long reading over land of the dead and stuff. waaaay to long. I'm going to try to read about..um... movies..with...uh...

Crap.

ZOMBIE SCRIPTS.

I got sunshine, in a bag.

Smurfy — 2005-02-05T12:02:14-05:00

I'm useless, but not for long...

The future, you see, is coming on. is coming on.

The Boondock Saints

Smurfy — 2005-02-05T10:02:33-05:00

So, rejoice. The saints are maching.

What a freakin' awesome movie. (I'm spreading the word, by the way, by means of this bloggable medium)

That was a very very good movie. So those idiots on the IMDB boards are even more justifiably stupid. I hate IMDB message board users. Anyway.

So, you know what a good film to watch this coming friday night is? You know, with the family (HINT: DO NOT WATCH WITH YOUR FAMILY), it's "The Boondock Saints"

It's DO IT good.

(That's subliminal messaging)

______________________

Moving on, you know, I'm begginigng to loath dancing again. Every muscle in my body wants to throw up.

You know?

Friggin', what, 3 and a half hours choreographing "Blow Gabriel, Blow"

That's way wrong. TWISTED wrong.

Wrong like ordering a cheeseburger at olive garden wrong.

I'm reminded of this brief interaction with Kate, that I figured would end my life.

Kate asked me the eternal question of ultimate pain and suffering. She says to me,

Smurfy, do these jeans make my butt look big?

Fill in the blank for the answer, any way you do it it's wrong. \

Also, HAPPY WOOGY DAY!

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-05T11:02:05-05:00

To paraphrase Mr. TelevisonMan, every once in awhile you run into a flash movie that sticks with you for awhile. This is one of those moments.

http://www.channel101.com/view.php?media_id=447

Also, this man is a hero beyond comparison.

Stolen from approximately one hundred sixty thousand other users.

Smurfy — 2005-02-06T08:02:25-05:00

Post a memory you have of me in the comments. It can be anything you want. Then post this in your journal and see what people remember of you.

But, since I stole it, chances are you already posted it.

Also, the patriots are teh friggin stupid.

Hey juuuuuude

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-07T08:02:17-05:00

Fair weather has nothing on me.

Today was not amazing.

Traffic Circles SUCK.

Smurfy — 2005-02-08T10:02:29-05:00

The weather was beautiful again. Even this evening, as I drove back home. You know what would be a suitable thing to do now? A list of grievances. Against things. and STUFF.

AND MORE STUFF.

An essay by Smurfy, on why these last two days were not ver good two days.

Let's begin with yesterday morning.

I awoke, finding that Ferret had somehow been in my room all night, and had chewed up some random papers and generally made a mess. She later snuck back inside my room twice while I was trying to get ready for school. I then had to fish out the demented cat menace with a newspaper and a really terrible attitude. On the bus, my MP3 player had forgotten to remind me it needed new batteries. It was very very dead. Later that morning, while trying to escape from Brittany hijacking and escorting me to the 1000 building, I fell, and Jason for some bizarre reason I don't fully understand kicked the ever-living crap out of my stomach and hand.

Later I forgot my homework ine english and math.

Onward Ho!

Lunch time!

Now, normally in lunch, I get either those crappy turkey subs with a side of chips and chocolate milk. Or, on occasion, I'll get a slice of pizza with fries and chocolate milk. It was decided, you know, that whatever I got that day, the chocolate milk wouldn't like me. The chocolate milk. As I got to my table, and unpacked the tray, I noticed how oddly heavy the carton was. As I opened it, I discovered to my dismay that it was very very very frozen. As I grew more and more agitated with the day, I slammed the milk down on my lunch tray and proceeded to beat the crap out of it. Bad idea. After cleaning up chocolate ice cream for a few minutes, I left and stumbeled around lunch until I could head on over to class. In theater, I listened to Alli Lyle talk more about how FRIGGIN' AWESOME HARRY POTTER IS.

We aren't big fan's Of Alli Lyle these days. Then there was drama club! We auditioned the kids for parts in "This is a test", and everyone did a way awesome job (Imagine that, a highlight!). Jason and Blake were the only guys, so it was easy seeing where we could fit them. But then we had 60-19 girls. That'll be a bit tougher.

Warning: apostrophe errors.

And then there was musical practice.

Musical practice sucked ENDLESSLY.

The End.

AND THEN THERE WAS THE MORROW!

THE MORROW I SAY

I rememebered that my MP3 player was very dead, so I made it live again. This was of course after I fell outside, int he dirtish area. We had the old bus again, which just meant an uncomfortable seat. Apparently Asheeka (Ashieka) (As...screw it.) is going to stop doing our route, because they had some other guy riding in order to see how she drives it, or something. That's what she told us anyway. She's told us this before. She's very...

...

She's herself anyway.

Regardless, I arrived at school. Previously, the day before, Richard had come up with a cool plan to poke Jason. Blake was also involved. After we rushed him, I recieved a good knock to the eye that dislocated a contact, and I was very blind for the rest of the day.

Later on, I forgot my english homework again, my civics binder was Missing In Action, and Eric smelled terrible. Eric is my biology partner. Eric is a very tall very acne-endowed very mumbly non-understandable person who dislikes the act of showering. He smelled very bad, and I don't mean the "Jeez 4th period tired" smell. I mean it smelled like a cat took a dump all over him. I couldn't breathe for the most part. He later mumbled something about how he hated how no one could understand him. I said "What?" And he didn't say anything else.

And then we had musical practice tonight.

Musical Practice wasn't much worth attending again.

The End

Chapter Three: The gas tank scenario-

I noticed my gas gauge was getting low, so I decided I'd go get gas.

I pulled into the mighty EXXON station, and popped the gas button, and prepared to feed the magnificent* smurfmobile.

*The smurfmobile is generally a jerk.

I went around the car, and proceeded to pull the gas cap off. The gas cap would not come off. Now, THere were two people around me, and I attracted their attention by the fact that I was talking about how much I hated myself for not being able to pull off a gas cap. I ran around the car and re-popped my gas tank to make sure I didnt do anything stupid like usual, and see if it would work this time. It pulled off, and I put the gas nozzle up to the car. I accidentily squeezed the trigger to early and got gas on my hand, and then realized the gas cap had not come off, it had broken apart, and the end was still stuck into the tank, now I had gas on my car. The two general looking rednecks were laughign very hard at me by this point, so I threw the gass nozzle back into the pump, slammed the stupid gas door shut, and pulled right out in front of a car, and they flicked me off for a good 60 feet before I could get onto the highway.

I hate gas tanks.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, this is my January and February's worth of angst. Merry Christmas. Enjoy the weather!

I'm going off to ignore an IM from XOXOBABYLUVSMEXOX.

And I'll ignore it for hours.

The Royal Popcorn Tub

Smurfy — 2005-02-09T10:02:30-05:00

Well, Ladies and gentlemen.

Today's the day.

You know, the big day.

When..

Um..

Well, today was pretty average. But JAZZY.

No musical rehearsal, so I still hold on to some section of my sanity. Let's see.

Yeah, I got nothin'.

I'm really honestly trying to think of something...some...relevance...

Nah.

MERRY CHRISTMAS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

HAHAHA! IM DOING IT! AND NO CREDIT ANYWHERE!

YOUR PORN STAR NAME:
(NAME OF FIRST PET+STREET YOU LIVE ON):
Ferocious Hauser (I am a terrible pornstar)

YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME:
(YOUR MIDDLE NAME +GRANDFATHERS FIRST NAME):
James Charlie

YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME:
(FIRST WORD YOU SEE ON YOUR LEFT+FAVOURITE RESTAURANT):
Glinx Liberty

SOCIALITE ALIAS:
(SILLIEST CHILDHOOD NICKNAME+TOWN WHERE YOU FIRST PARTIED):
Nagrom Lewisville

"Rap Star" ALIAS (a la J. Lo):
(FIRST INITIAL+FIRST TWO OR THREE LETTERS OF YOUR LAST NAME):
M. STEW

ICON ALIAS:
(SOMETHING SWEET WITHIN SIGHT+ANY LIQUID IN KITCHEN):
Pepper Cholorox

DETECTIVE ALIAS:
(FAVORITE BABY ANIMAL+WHERE YOU WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL):
Pup West

BARFLY ALIAS:
(LAST SNACK FOOD YOU ATE+YOUR FAVORITE DRINK):
Strawberry Sundrop

SOAP OPERA ALIAS:
(MIDDLE NAME+STREET WHERE YOU FIRST LIVED):
James Hauser

ROCK STAR ALIAS:
(FAVORITE CANDY+LAST NAME OF FAVORITE MUSICIAN):

SKITTLES um...Oh screw this.

JUMP!

Smurfy — 2005-02-10T05:02:50-05:00

The following qutoe was recorded from West Forsyth at 3:15 PM

A fellow, "Paul", asked the following question:

"Mr Clyburn, I've always wondered, how much milk goes bad in grocery stores?"

Too which Ferris J. Sullivan replied:

"Who in the heck ever wonders about something so stupid."

___________________

At the sound of the music, everyone is dismissed.

3 seconds later, THE 90'S HIP HOP/RAP DEAT MUSIC ECHOED ACROSS THE ENTIRE CAMPUS:

"EVERYBODY JUMP, JUMP!

....EVERYBODY JUMP, JUMP!"

To which Smurfy replied:

"I hate my life so much sometimes."

As I glanced over my shoulder and saw one of the 700 building janitors waiting for all the kids to go past, I saw him nodding his head in shame.

JURASSICHICKEN

Smurfy — 2005-02-11T10:02:13-05:00

"Jurrasichicken"

In biology, we were given a sheet of paper with a bucnh of bones to cut out, and we were told to make some kinf of ani-beast, and explain what ti was with a story. I was paired with two freshmen girls and that partner of mine who consistently smells worse then a pile of decaying animals.

I said, you know, we need to make a bird looking thing.

I assemebeled an animal that could not possibly function, nor could it ever hope to exist.

The name name was

JurrasiChicken

After we invented a story, Mrs. Felder said that it was very funny, but didn't follow the guidelines for the project at all.

Project BEAST:.......

FAIL'D

Because I can.

Smurfy — 2005-02-11T11:02:48-05:00

Name: Smurfy
Age: 16
Gender: Total guy.
Sexuality: Straight
Religion (if any): Christian (Southern Baptist)
Current Residence: Lewisville. The only other place I'd rather be in the world is wilmington.

+::Either Or::+

Hot Topic or no topic: Go away, bad stores of no good merchandise.

Rain or Snow: Rain.

Shower or Bath: ehhh...Shower.

Tennis Shoe or flip flop: Absolutely tennis shoes.
Sunrise or sunset: Sunrise.
Glasses or Contacts: It depends. If I want to look....not smurfy-like, glasses.

Crayons or Markers: ....Um..Crayons.
Pens or Pencils: Hmmmm....Pencils. They produce a way cooler look in the writing.
Optimistic or Pessimistic: Probably a pessimist.

Crushed or cubed (ice): Totally crushed. But only sometimes. Mostly I dont like ice at all.
AIM or phone: Depends on who it is. If it's some idiot who can't type at all, the phone.
T-shirt or Tank top: T-shirt for SURE.
High Heels or No heels: ....Maybe I took the wrong quiz.

+Opinions::+

Abortion: hahaha. How in the heck can you be for it if you're friggin born.
Religion: ::lightning:: I'm a christian.

Gay Marriage: ...hahaha. No.
Death Penalty: Absolutely for it, depending ont he case. Muder? Yes.

Premarital Sex: Those hormones.

Drinking Age: I don't really care. I'm not going to drink, regardless.
The Draft: If abbbbbbsolutely necessary. Right now? In Iraq? No.
Legalize Marijuana: No real opinion.

Pornography: Oh, we had to bring that up didn't we.
Divorce: In my opinion, if you got married for the right reasons to someone you really loved, thsi wouldn't be an option. Fools who rush into something for lust, or who just feel confused, sure. Abuse too, sure.
Online Dating: ...How does that even work?

+::Curious::+

If you could have any magical power what would it be?: ....>D...Invisibility.
Do you believe in "perfect"?: No.
If you could have lunch with any three famous people, who would they be?: shoot..um..Some actors... I don't know really.

Do you wish on stars?: Not now?

Do you keep a journal or diary?: I have a real journal that I'vekept since age 6. First grade.

What is your profession?: Absolutely nothing. I'd love to act.
Do you drink or do any drugs/ have you?: I've ahd chewin' tobbacco. Terrible stuff.
Do you play an instrument?: No.
Have you ever been in love?:...No.

Have you ever cheated on someone or been cheated on?: Nu-uh.
Have you ever broken someone's heart or had your heart broken?: In way's.
If you could get inside one persons head for a day, who would it be and why?: I would love to see how someone like quentin tarention views things..

If you could ask one question to everyone else, what would it be?: What is that smell?
+::Favorites::+

Flavor of Starburst: Cherry

Kind of ice cream: Coffee, by breyers.
Beverage: Code Red, or sundrop soda.
Restaraunt: Olive Garden
Color: BLue
Pizza Topping: Pepperoni

Store: ...hm...Borders, or..GameStop
Holiday: Just summer
Season: Fall.Cold enough for jeans, warm enough for tshirts.

CD/Band: Not really a favorite CD. My favorite bands are smash mouth, a few others.

Place to relax: My room, or my grandpa's old hay field behind my house. I built this..bench there. It's verrrrry very pleasent. I go there alot.

Sport: Probably basketball. I pretty much suck at it, but...

Movie: Pulp Fiction, Sky Captain, Office Space, Willard.
Actor and Actress: Hmmm....Probably Jim Carrey. ..Conan O'Briend doesn't work here.

Book and Author: I think the best book I've ever read is "Legion", By William Blatty, thanks to Jason.
Artist/Photographer: ...I'm kind of artsy, not that artsy.

I AM MEGAMAN.:: :: how nintendo are you?

Smurfy — 2005-02-12T11:02:53-05:00

:: how nintendo are you? ::

SWEET.

Maybe I can be in MegaMan 6....

Really ironic. When I was little I used to have this blue cardboard paper towel roll and I would walk around with it on my arm and throw marbles out of it with my hand, and say I was megaman.

GO MEGABUSTER

Job Hours.

Smurfy — 2005-02-12T02:02:18-05:00

The job that I applied for back in July has just been unfrozen, the one at the library.

The hours are Mon-tuesday and 4-9, thursday through friday from 4-6, and saturday from ...I, how usual, I forgot to write it down and now I've forgotten.

So sudden.

Now I'm dead in the middle of the musical,

And I am so screwed.

Crawler Library.

Smurfy — 2005-02-13T12:02:59-05:00

MYSTERY!

Smurfy — 2005-02-13T05:02:28-05:00

I guess I just never really paid attention to what they actually SAID in "The Breakfast Club".

Now it all makes sense.

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-13T10:02:48-05:00

Now, I'm not one to brag about the good things.

But I think I just got off that bed leg for a second.

This is that brief period in-between times where everything messes up, and I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time. Not unlike Monica Lewinsky, or, for example, Jay Leno's chin and that anvil.

I PITY THE FOO'!

Smurfy — 2005-02-14T09:02:26-05:00

Man was wendy's awesome or what.

"Don't give me no back-talk, SUCKA"

Katie has this maginificent device. It's called

"Mr. T in my pocket"

It comes loaded with 6 Mr T voice clips.

It is HOTT, FOOL.

A TIMELY MANNER

Smurfy — 2005-02-15T10:02:02-05:00

Everything about my blog won't load right tonight. But anyway.

Wendy's is the new hangout, apparently.

Although, because of Hubbard's insistence that we ramble on for 45 minutes after practice ended, Kate and Blake weren't able to join us. Really it was depressing, but we're going to try to do it again next time. Next time will be much better, hopefully. And we will get out on time.

The cast list got posted, and they wouldn't let us give the teacher role to blake. Kind of takes out alot of the humor there. But anyway.

I do believe I don't have any more time right now. It's getting down to the wire with practices. And with homework, I'm running short on time stuff. Don't expect huge detail driven updates for the next few weeks. Every now and then maybe..

Anywho.

Walk on!

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-16T04:02:33-05:00

Man, it feels some kinda wiggy outside today. News of the day:

A power pole feel along the bus route.

Also, someone had a verrrry terrible day. Getting really dead.

I mean VERY dead.

Heres the story!

"Authorities said someone was walking in the far right-hand lane of the interstate, near the Lewisville-Clemmons exit, and was struck by a white Chevy Lumina with two people inside.

Investigators said that another vehicle, probably a tractor trailer, hit the person a second time.

The people in the Lumina didn't speak English, and authorities had to locate a translator to continue the investigation."

Any-the-way.

After quickly taking care of this hole in my wallett, IM OFF ON ADVENTURES THAT DO NOT INVOLVE HEROICS AT ALL! NOR NARCOTICS!

My Art is MADNESS.

Smurfy — 2005-02-16T04:02:18-05:00

And for all you (THERE ARE NONE) people who enjoy the headers, there's a new one.

Twice. AND ALSO VANITY!

Smurfy — 2005-02-16T09:02:41-05:00

I really hate my car sometimes.

This is twice.

Twice.

No dashboard lights, no high-beams...

No passengers,

Le sigh.

So, while Im trying to find a fuse to fix it, try this.

1. I ____ Smurfy.
2. Smurfy is ____.
3. Smurfy needs ____.
4. I want to ____ Smurfy.
5. Smurfy can ____.
6. Smurfy reminds me of ____.
7. Without Smurfy, ___.
8. Smurfy can be ____.
9. Smurfy is always ____.
10. The worst thing about Smurfy is ____.
11. The best thing about Smurfy is ____.
12. I think Smurfy should ____.
13. If Smurfy was an animal, he'd be a(n) ____.
14. Smurfy makes me want to ____.
15. Smurfy probably tastes like ____.
16. If I could spend the day with Smurfy, I'd ____.
17. I'd ____ for Smurfy.
18. Smurfy is made of ____.
19. If I could be Smurfy for a day, I'd ____.
20. The song ____ by ____ reminds me of Smurfy.

I HATE that guy.

Smurfy — 2005-02-17T05:02:27-05:00

The motorist children fixed my car for 20 dollars. I'm pretty sure they just hit switch under the dash that said "Cut Lights On".

On any account, that's better then the 350 dollar charge of last time, when it broke down after Jason and I unsuccessfully tried to cheat out the movie theater hoodlums. IS that how you spell that?

Hoodlooms..Eh.

Anyway.

In other news, Cicivs was ligthened today when I sat in the back of class with Ferris, Christin, Cole, and the short guy, and played calculator games all class and made jokes about captain planet and jeff foxworthy. I hate that guy.

"If you clip your fingernails with a lawnmower, you MIGHTTTT be a redneck!"

DEATH BE UPON YOU, SIR FOXWORTHY.

Office space..AGAIN?

Smurfy — 2005-02-18T05:02:07-05:00

So, as it turns out, it WAS a button that said "Turn Lights On" ...sort of. IM OFF TO ...um.. Oh, shoot, tech crew. Guess I'm watching Office Space again. Rawr. Also, in health, I learend that I wasnt fat

no subject

Smurfy — 2005-02-18T05:02:46-05:00

Also, in a very special Get Fuzzy:

How will you DIE?
Name / Username
You will die	horribly
At age	56

This cool quiz by Confused_Pete - Taken 303425 Times.